Queen of Stars and Shadows (Dark Fae Guardian #3)

Zyren

Chapter Twenty-Two

Zyren

I watch Sarielle as she sleeps next to the tiny spring I’d dragged her to after she passed out. I’d made her drink, which I don’t even know if she was conscious of. Her eyes had been darker than midnight. And then she’d fallen into a deep sleep.

I’d slept, too, for how many hours I’m unsure. When I’d finally awoken, I said a prayer that we made it, and that we have a source of water that can keep us alive. Sarielle’s inner nightmare must have taken over, had led us to this water. We’d be dead otherwise.

Now we just need to find a way out of here.

I’m tempted to let Sarielle sleep longer, but I gently nudge her awake. When her eyes flutter open, they’re black for a moment, and she jerks back away from me suspiciously. But the darkness recedes, the golden hue returns to them, and then Sarielle’s body slackens in relief.

“Zyren,” she sighs. Her voice sounds scratchy still.

“Here, have some more water.”

I point to the spring bubbling up from the rock a few inches from her face. She bends down to it and drinks thirstily, scooping handful after handful into her mouth.

“Thank the dark goddess,” she murmurs, wiping the back of her hand across her lips.

“I already have. A few times,” I say with a chuckle.

Satiated, Sarielle sits up and looks around at the narrow chasm of stone. The walls are about a dozen feet high, and it’s no more than twenty feet across. The spring bubbles up at one end of the valley, and trickles along the floor of it until it curves from view a few hundred feet beyond.

“My nightmare found this place,” she says softly. “I fainted, and she took over.” A shiver moves over her.

I know the unease she feels. It’s been my constant companion for centuries, ever since I discovered the truth about myself. That there was a darkness within me, a darkness neither of my brothers had. A darkness that had skipped everyone in my immediate family but chose me. I may not have more recent memories, but I’ve lived with this one for so long, I remember it all too well.

That’s how the nightmare blood worked in House Lyonian, and Sarielle’s family as well. It skipped generations, landing only with a select few. All stemming from the union of an Otreyas woman and a nightmare two thousand years before. And of course, spreading to my own family when we intermarried. I know it’s just a random blood trait, something I hadn’t chosen or earned, but I’d never been able to shake the deep shame I felt, to have this monster inside me.

Never knowing, every time I unleash my most powerful magic, if that darkness will take me over for good.

“You’re back now, though,” I say, attempting a comforting smile.

She cocks her head to the side, contemplating something. “Riya didn’t seem concerned that she’d lose herself to her nightmare.”

“You know Riya?”

Sarielle’s shoulders droop slightly. “Yes. It was during the time you don’t remember. We sought refuge with her when House Septarus was looking for us. It seems an eternity ago now.” Her expression turns wistful.

It’s true, my best friend in the whole world is part nightmare, probably my best friend for that very reason. She’s the only one I’d been able to share my secret with. If Sarielle knows her, and we stayed at Riya’s house…

“You’re right, Riya doesn’t fight her inner nightmare. But then, Riya isn’t concerned about many things in life.” A small smile crosses my face thinking of her. “Does she still have that little gnome cooking for her?”

Sarielle gives me a strange look. “A small dragon, not a gnome. Wyn.”

So she does know Riya, and had truly been to her house. I can’t imagine I ever would have taken Sarielle there if she’d been my enemy, as Jonavus told me. Which means Sarielle has been telling the truth, like my gut was telling me this whole time, even as my head warred with me.

Because if Sarielle is telling the truth, then that means my brother isn’t.

“Tell me everything, Sarielle,” I say, sliding closer to her along the smooth rock at the spring’s edge. “Tell me how we met. Tell me what brought us to Riya’s house. All of it.”

And she tells me.

When she’s finally done, she looks at me, tears glistening in her eyes. “Do you believe me now?”

I nod slowly. “I do.”

She lets out a shuddering breath, and one of her tears breaks free and slips down her cheek. I can’t imagine what it must have been like for her these last few days, thinking I’d betrayed her. She looks so fragile, so delicate, but she’s the strongest woman I know.

“I’m so sorry, Sarielle. I still don’t remember, but I believe you.”

I lean forward and cup her cheek in my palm, brushing my thumb along her jaw. She leans into my touch, and I run my hand up into her hair, stroking the silky strands of it. Her golden eyes burn into mine, and I wish I could take away every ounce of pain she’s ever experienced, and every ounce of pain she’ll experience from this day forward.

I fell in love with this woman once before, and now, for the second time, I’ve fallen for her all over again. She’s a song written for my soul, and my soul alone, and that melody is etched into every fiber of my being. Maybe it wasn’t so much that I’d fallen for her again, because that song had never left my heart, even if the memories in my head abandoned me.

Slowly, I pull her forward into the circle of my arms. She tilts her head up and I lean toward her, my lips hovering just over hers. I pause and breathe in the scent of her a moment before pressing my mouth against hers, tasting her tears and her magic. Her lips part for me, and I deepen the kiss, sliding my tongue against hers. She moans into my mouth, shivering and sliding her hand up the bare expanse of my chest.

My inner nightmare surges. He doesn’t want to be sweet. He wants to take her up against the stones, hard and fast, until she screams my name. I let him buck against me, but I have no intention of rushing this. I’ve finally realized that this woman is truly mine, not someone deceiving me, leading me astray. She’s my wife, even if I don’t remember everything that happened.

When Sarielle climbs into my lap, straddling me, I realize she may have different plans entirely. She kisses me ferociously, arms wrapped around the back of my neck, one hand in my hair, the other digging into my shoulders. My body responds viscerally, and I can feel the length of me hardening against her. She makes a sound that’s half gasp, half moan, and bucks her hips against me.

“Zyren, I need you now …”

The earth begins to shake, and for a moment I think it’s our magic, our nightmares coming out to play.

But I quickly realize that it’s this whole place—the stone, the chasm, the land itself. An earthquake. Pebbles begin to fall from the ceiling above. I crush Sarielle against me, pulling her head down into my chest to protect her from the falling rubble. I can feel the pounding of her heart against mine, in panic now, not lust. Outside, a howling wind rages across the dunes, spraying bits of sand down into the valley, pelting our skin and our eyes and ruining any thought of climbing to higher ground to escape the rocks.

We cling to each other as the world seems to come undone around us.

The quake lasts for nearly two minutes, an eternity during which I say every prayer I know to the dark goddess. I want to survive this. I want to get back my memories. I want Sarielle to know how I feel, even if I never regain that part of our life. When the earth finally quits shaking, we hold onto each other for another few minutes, relishing that we are alive.

When we finally pull apart, Sarielle’s eyes are wide. “There were a couple quakes like that back in Valaron, on the way to the Court of Memory.”

I cock my head to the side. “That’s odd…”

“It was Avonia, using dark magic to pull nightmares across the border of their territory. Breaking through the spell we wrought when we married, to keep them locked away from the rest of the realm.” She sucks in a deep breath. “There were other things, too. The rifts, of course. And night turning to day, and vice versa. The whole realm was starting to come apart.”

“So, if that’s happening here…”

“That means there must be a rift in this realm. A rift connecting to Valaron.”

My gaze locks onto Sarielle’s. “And if there’s a rift, that means we can get out of here.”