Quiet Longing (Quiet Love #2)

4.

Charli

I was lounging on Nuala’s bed flipping through a photo album. There were lots of her and her friends. I recognised a few from the group that showed up at the party the other night. Nuala hadn’t mentioned them since. In fact, she didn’t mention any of her friends, which I found strange since, from what I’d gathered in our emails, she was popular at school. It made me wonder what exactly had gone down with the blonde Tristan had ordered to leave the party.

“I can’t decide which swimsuit to wear,” Nuala said, distracting me from my perusal of the photos.

Glancing up, I saw she held two options. A plain black one-piece and a bright pink bikini. They were so opposite I hardly believed the same person owned both.

“Which would you be more comfortable in?” I asked.

“Well, obviously the one-piece, but …” she trailed off.

“But?” I prodded.

Nuala cast me a look like she was being indulgent. “I’d feel prettier in the bikini.”

“So, wear the bikini.”

“There’s just the hazard of my boobs slipping out. And Derek won’t be pleased.”

“Derek shouldn’t be looking at his own sister in a bathing suit,” I said, still a little peeved about the whole warning his friends away from me thing.

Nuala sighed. “It’s not like that. He just knows what teenage boys are like because he is one, and he wants to protect me. Well, us . Now that you’re here for the summer, he’s taken you under his wing of brotherly protection as well. There’s not much you can do about it.”

“I don’t need a protector,” I grumbled. “I should talk to him.”

“You can try, but he won’t listen. Anyway, never mind about my overbearing brother, which swimsuit am I wearing? You pick for me.”

“The pink,” I said with a smile, and Nuala grinned.

“The pink one it is, then.”

I didn’t have the same dilemma as Nuala since I’d only packed one bathing suit. It was dark blue and functional, though I planned to wear a maxi dress over it since I was still undecided about swimming in the sea. It was summer, and the weather was nice—by Irish standards—but I still suspected the water was going to be very cold.

There was also the fact that I was sometimes a little self-conscious about my body. If only I’d taken after my mother’s side of the family. The Balfe women were naturally slim and waifish. Delicate. Me, on the other hand, well, I had big boobs, a definite belly, and a butt that often struggled to fit into jeans. Let’s just say, if I were to don Nuala’s tiny pink bikini, it would be considered downright indecent.

“Right, you better go get ready. The boys will be leaving soon,” Nuala said, shooing me from her room since I was still wearing my sleep shorts and ratty T-shirt.

I took a quick shower then changed into my bathing suit and patterned maxi dress before sliding on my flip flops. I twisted my hair up into a knot then put on a little lip gloss and mascara. I figured there was no point putting on too much makeup in case I did end up going for a dip.

There were voices out front, and I went to my bedroom window, peering down onto the drive. The boys were loading stuff into the back of a grey SUV. It was Aunt Jo’s car, but she must’ve been letting them borrow it since there were too many of us to fit into any of the other vehicles.

Grabbing the bag I’d packed with a towel and some water, I went downstairs to join the others. Nuala was already there chatting with Theo and Tristan.

I was making my way towards them when Aidan called, “Moretti! Come sit next to me.”

He waved me over, wearing shorts, a blue shirt, and a pair of Ray Bans resting on top of his head. I was sceptical of his overt friendliness since the other night he’d expressly stated I wasn’t his type. Maybe he was just a genuinely friendly sort of guy, which was fine, but if he was manipulating me, then that wasn’t fine. Had he said I wasn’t his type so I’d start wondering why I wasn’t his type and then begin obsessing?

Hmm, maybe Irish boys were into mind games.

I’d had two boyfriends back home. Lee Sunny when I was fifteen for three months and then Art Collier for six months when I was seventeen. I hadn’t slept with either of them though we had kissed. Both were quiet, artsy, a little shy, and very studious. They were sweet boys and definitely not into playing games.

I walked up to Aidan and smiled politely, “Hello, all ready for the beach?”

He opened the car door and motioned for me to get in. “Yep, all set.”

“Thanks,” I replied, feeling his hand on my elbow for a second before I slid in and found Rhys sitting on the far side next to the window. For some reason, seeing him made me catch my breath. We’d spent the entire day working together yesterday, and he’d been so patient with me. I still had his hoodie in my bedroom since I hadn’t the opportunity to wash it yet.

Rhys stared at his phone, his frown and tense shoulders making him look like someone who had the weight of the world weighing down on them. It struck me as unusual. Everything in his aura depicted a boy who was emotionally exhausted. He hadn’t seemed that way before.

“Hey,” I said softly, and his eyes flicked up. As soon as he saw me, his frown dissolved, a faint smile taking its place. I liked seeing him smile, but he did it so seldom and never fully. I felt like making it my mission this summer to encourage him to smile as often as possible. I was talking wide, teeth showing, eye-twinkling smiles. I wasn’t sure where the instinct came from. I just had this odd urge to make him happy.

“Charli,” he said, sliding his phone back in his pocket. “How are you today? Not too sore after yesterday?”

“ What did you just ask her?” Aidan, who’d climbed into the car behind me, interjected. Rhys winced, closed his eyes for a second, then opened them and cast me a look of embarrassment.

Enjoying the idea of bothering Aidan since he clearly imagined himself to be the stud of the group, I slid close to Rhys, our thighs touching. I turned to Aidan, tilting my head.

“Rhys asked if I was sore after yesterday. Not that it’s any of your business.”

Aidan’s eyebrows jumped while Rhys cleared his throat. “We’re working together at the hotel,” he quietly clarified. “Yesterday, Charli helped me clean the freezer.”

I chuckled, dipping my head to Rhys as I whispered, “You’re far too honest.”

Rhys’ eyes met mine, still looking painfully embarrassed about his choice of phrasing.

Aidan appeared surprised. “You’re working at the hotel?”

“You might not realise, but some people work for a living. Haven’t you ever had a job?”

Aidan rubbed his jaw. “Well, technically, no, but—”

“Is everyone ready to go?” Derek asked as he climbed into the driver’s seat. Our conversation about jobs was cut short when Tristan, Theo, and Nuala huddled into the car, and then Derek was reversing out of the driveway. He turned on the radio, some dance song blasting as we headed down the coastal road towards the next town.

“Are you all right?” I asked Rhys quietly while the others chatted over us. I hadn’t forgotten how stressed he’d seemed staring at his phone earlier.

“I’m okay,” he replied, glancing at me briefly. I got the sense he was lying, but then again, I hardly knew the guy. Whatever was going on with him wasn’t my business even if some part of me wanted to keep prodding.

I looked out the window at the passing scenery, excited to do some sun bathing. I was typically a little tan, but I tanned even more when I spent time in the sun. Next to me, Rhys’ phone vibrated in his pocket. I watched as he pulled it out and glowered. The name “Dad” was on the screen. Rhys ended the call and gruffly shoved the phone back in his pocket. I looked away, wondering why he wasn’t answering his father’s call. Had they gotten into a fight? That would explain why he seemed so stressed.

I just hoped it wasn’t anything too serious.

We arrived at the beach a few minutes later. It took a while for Derek to find a parking spot, and I was surprised to see the beach was already crowded with people. We were clambering out of the car when my phone rang with a call from Mom. Nuala shot me a questioning look, but I motioned for her to go ahead.

“It’s my mom,” I said, holding up the phone. “I’ll catch up with you in a minute.”

“Okay, well, text me if you get lost.”

I nodded and answered brightly, “Hey Mom.”

“Charli, how are you? You never called yesterday. I was worried.”

“I’m good. I had my first shift at the hotel, so I was exhausted by the end of it. I’m sorry I forgot to call. How is everything at home?”

I heard her blow out a breath. “Everything’s fine here. The usual. I just wanted to check in with you before I went to work. Are you getting along okay with your cousins? And what about the job? Are your coworkers friendly?”

“The job is tiring but manageable. One of Derek and Tristan’s friends works there, so he’s been showing me the ropes. I’m getting along with my cousins just fine. You know I love Nuala. Derek seems to be a little overprotective though I’m sure I can handle him.”

“Overprotective?”

“He told all his friends I was off limits.” I gave a chuckle. “Sounds like something out of a cheesy teen movie, right?”

“Hmm, he must take after his father. Padraig used to be the same with me,” Mom replied. “Although he never had any friends I was interested in so it didn’t make a difference. It’s probably for the best anyway, hon. You don’t need some boy turning your head. Before you know it, summer will be over, and you’ll be going off to college. I don’t need you coming home heartbroken and telling me you want to move to Ireland permanently.”

“Mom! As if I would ever do that. You know how excited I am for college. I worked my butt off for that scholarship.” As I said it, a trickle of guilt seeped in because I wasn’t being completely honest. Don’t get me wrong, I had no intention of falling head over heels and messing up my future, but a little fling would be nice. I could lose my V card before college, get some experience …

“Right, good. Well, I’m glad we’re on the same page.”

“We definitely are.”

“So, what are your plans for today?”

“I’ve just arrived at the beach. Nuala and I are going to sunbathe and maybe take a swim.”

“How lovely. Oh, I do miss the beaches back home, especially in the summer. Well, I’ll let you go, then. Enjoy your day!”

“You, too. Talk soon, Mom. Love you.”

“Love you, too, hon.”

We hung up, and I dropped my phone in my tote bag, scanning the beach for Nuala and the others. It was completely crowded, and I couldn’t see them anywhere. I was about to pull out my phone again to call Nuala when Derek suddenly appeared.

“Thought you might need some help finding us,” he said, shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Right, thanks. It’s like a maze of people here. I had no idea it was going to be so busy.”

“Give Dubliners a sunny day, and they’ll flock to the beach like ants,” he replied with a grin.

Thinking this might be a good moment to have that talk with him, I said, “So, Aidan mentioned something about you warning him and the rest of your friends away from me?”

Derek cast me a glance then blew out an irritated breath. “Of course, he did. Aidan can’t keep his mouth shut to save his life.”

“Well, I just wanted you to know there’s no need for you to give any warnings on my behalf. I mean, I understand you being protective of Nuala. She’s your sister. But you don’t have to worry about me in that way. I’m a smart girl and can take care of myself, and I can certainly fend off any unwanted advances.”

Derek eyed me speculatively for a moment. “You obviously aren’t that smart if you’ve let Aidan Finnegan turn your head. He’s a player. Girls are a challenge to him, and once he has them, he moves on to the next.”

I barked a laugh. “I’m not interested in Aidan. Please give me more credit than that.”

“Then, why do you care that I told him to leave you alone?”

I pressed my lips together, a flash of Rhys’ handsome profile entering my head, the intense way he regarded me, and those blue eyes. “It’s the principal of the thing.”

Derek must’ve seen something in my expression because he stopped walking. “Wait, do you like one of the others? Theo?”

“No, I don’t like any of the others. I’ve barely spoken to Theo.”

He stared at me, again seeing I was holding something back. “Rhys?” he asked, and my expression must’ve wavered because his eyes widened. “Oh, fuck, you like Rhys? That’s a plot twist.”

“I don’t like him like him,” I hastily explained. “I just think he’s nice. I enjoy his company and general vibe.”

“Uh huh. Well, now, I have to do something I never imagined I’d do and warn you to keep away from my friend.”

“What?! Why?”

Derek’s expression sobered as he glanced out towards the water. “Rhys is my best friend. He’s not like Aidan or Theo. A girl like you, all you’d have to do is give him some attention, and you’d have his heart on a platter. He’s the best person I know, loyal to a fault. He doesn’t need you batting your eyelashes at him, making him fall for you, and then flitting away back to America when the summer ends. You’ll fuck him up, and the lad already has enough on his plate.”

I was certain my expression displayed my annoyance. Though I admired Derek’s protectiveness over his friend, I didn’t appreciate being cast as some femme fatale who’d stomp all over poor, innocent Rhys’ heart. I was a decent person, and I cared about other people’s feelings. I would never intentionally toy with a boy’s emotions.

I placed my hands on hips as I responded, “First of all, I would never do something like that to anyone. Second of all, I only said I enjoyed his company, I didn’t say I wanted to turn up at his door wearing a trench coat with nothing on underneath—"

“Well, thank fuck. You’d end the poor lad if you did that. He’s never even had a girlfriend.”

I blinked at this piece of information, filing it away for later, before I continued, “And third of all, what do you mean he already has enough on his plate?”

Derek frowned, not answering me right away, then said, “I don’t know exactly. Rhys doesn’t talk much about his home life, but I suspect his family struggles for money. His dad’s a bit of a prick and kicks him out of the house for the smallest of offences. I sometimes fear it could be even worse than that, but as I said, he doesn’t talk about it.”

As I listened, I remembered Rhys in the car not answering that call from his father. My stomach did a funny little twist. I hoped Derek wasn’t right about things being worse than just his dad being a general asshole.

“If it were worse, wouldn’t he tell you? I mean, I tell my best friends everything.”

Derek dragged a hand across his face. “Maybe. Maybe not. Not everyone’s an open book, Charli.”

I nodded, my mind on Rhys. I felt uneasy. The idea of him having a turbulent home life was upsetting to me.

“You surprise me,” Derek said then, breaking me from my thoughts.

I glanced at him. “I do?”

“I would’ve sworn a good looking bastard like Aidan might’ve turned your head, but you saw right through him. Most girls we hang out with are too dumb to see Rhys is the best of us, but you spotted it right away. Maybe you are as smart as you say.”

“So, the girls you’re friends with don’t ever flirt or show an interest in Rhys?” I asked, finding it hard to believe. He was so handsome, not to mention freaking tall . Sure, he was a few pounds overweight, but I was kind of into it. Not surprising since I’d spent several years with a giant crush on James Gandolfini.

“Nah, they’re too blinded by Aidan’s money and charm.” He paused to smile. “You know, I’d almost encourage you to go after Rhys just to see the look on Aidan’s face. He hates not being everybody’s first choice.”

“Yeah, well, he wouldn’t even be my tenth, so let him swallow that bitter pill,” I said with a wry chuckle. “And just so you know, I have no plans to go after Rhys, but I’d still like to hang out with him. You have my word I won’t break his heart or screw him over. I’m not that kind of person.”

Derek cast me a sad look though he seemed sad for Rhys rather than for me. “Just because you don’t intend to break someone’s heart, doesn’t mean you won’t. You can’t control the level of feelings another person has for you, Charli.”

Just ahead, I spotted the others setting up camp on a section of sand. Derek didn’t say anything else as he went to join them, but his parting words stayed with me. My eyes went to Rhys. Unlike the other boys, who were all going shirtless, he kept his T-shirt on as he sat on a towel next to Nuala. Maybe Derek was right. I couldn’t control what someone else felt for me, and I shouldn’t start anything with Rhys, especially not if he was dealing with a troubled home life. The last thing I wanted to do was cause a kind, sweet guy like him any pain on top of whatever he might already be going through.

A simple friendship seemed like the best course of action.

“Hey, mind if I set up here,” I asked, motioning to a spot next to Nuala.

“Of course, babe,” she replied, smiling as she slid her sunglasses into place and glanced out at all the people swimming in the water. The tide was out, so you had to walk a good distance from the sand to reach the sea. “What are we thinking? To swim or not to swim?” Nuala asked, tapping her lips.

“You’re at the beach. Of course, you’re swimming,” Tristan replied like it went without saying.

“Well, I nominate myself to stay put and watch over everyone’s belongings,” I said. “My mom told me about the jelly fish here. I don’t plan on getting stung.”

“Don’t so be boring, Charli. You’re on vacation,” Tristan cajoled, putting on a faux American accent, and I narrowed my eyes at him. Maybe I deserved it after all the times I’d teased Mom by mimicking how she spoke. Although growing up with her was good preparation for spending time with my cousins because I was used to hearing Irish turns of phrase around the house. My friends Lydia and Gwyn used to tease me when we were kids for sometimes calling cookies “biscuits,” or referring to hair ties as “bobbins.”

“Everyone has their own interpretation of vacation. Lazing on the sand and avoiding jelly fish is mine.”

He waved me off. “Pfft, whatever. Charli can play mother and mind our stuff, then. The rest of us kids are going swimming, and I won’t hear any objections.”

Rhys raised his hand. “I think I’ll stay here, too. I’m not a great swimmer.”

Derek’s gaze met mine, a slight look of accusation in his eyes that said, See? He’s already making up excuses to be around you. As if I’d somehow intentionally led his friend on, which wasn’t the case at all. Rhys and I could be friends without either of us getting the wrong impression.

Tristan frowned at Rhys. “Fine. Are there any more objections or are we going?”

“We’re going,” Derek replied just as Nuala stood and pulled off the T-shirt and shorts she’d been wearing over her bikini. Derek glowered but was smart enough not to tell her to cover up. I would’ve had something to say about it if he did. He seemed to swallow down his irritation, especially at the way both Theo and Aidan took several long glances at her. I noticed Rhys was the only boy not related to Nuala to keep his eyes to himself. In fact, he’d pulled a book from his backpack and was already reading.

He was a reader. Yet another reason for me to like him.

The group headed out towards the water, and I watched as Theo picked up what appeared to be a dead crab and flung it at Nuala. Wow, teenage boy flirting techniques really were something to behold. She squealed then chuckled and leapt out of the way. Derek gave Theo a slap on the head, and Theo raised his hands in surrender.

It was official. Derek was the father figure of the group.

“How long have you been friends with Derek and Tristan?” I asked Rhys, who raised his eyes from his book, Duma Key . It was Stephen King’s latest, and I wondered if it was any good. He slid his sunglasses up his head and levelled his eyes on me. They seemed even bluer with the sun shining through them.

“I think you call it kindergarten?” Rhys replied. “That’s where I met Derek, and then I became friends with Tristan through him.”

“That’s a long time.”

“You don’t have any friends who you met at that age?”

“Actually, I do. Lydia and Gwyn, and I can do you one better because we met in preschool when we were, like, three.”

Rhys smiled faintly, his eyes tracing over my bare shoulders and neck before returning to my face. “Will you miss them, being here all summer?”

“Yeah, but Lydia’s doing an internship at a newspaper for the summer, and Gwyn’s working at her dad’s restaurant, so I wouldn’t have seen a whole lot of them anyway. Besides, this way, I get to spend time with Nuala.”

Rhys nodded then fell quiet, his eyes wandering out to the water for a moment.

“How’s that book, by the way? Would you recommend it?”

He glanced back at the paperback on his lap. “It’s great. I can hardly put it down.” He paused then said, “You can borrow it when I’m done if you like.”

“Really? Yes, I’d love that. I love reading.”

Rhys smiled. “Me, too.”

We shared a long moment of eye contact before I dragged my gaze away. Reaching into my bag, I pulled out a small bottle of sunscreen and squeezed some onto my arms. Rhys looked away then picked his book back up and concentrated on reading.

“I haven’t had the chance to wash your hoodie yet, but I’ll do it today when we get home,” I said, and his eyes returned to me. His expression was unreadable.

Then he said, “Keep it. You might need it the next time we have to work in the freezer.”

Something about the way he’d said Keep it made my chest flutter. I knew I should decline, insist on returning it, but another part of me wanted to accept it, and that was the part that won out. I kept my mouth shut, and feeling brave, I pulled my maxi dress over my head. This way, I could get an all-over tan. Rhys’ attention flicked to me, his cheeks darkening before he looked away again. Something thrummed in my chest as I returned to putting on sunscreen, though I had trouble reaching my back. My swimsuit dipped low and I didn’t want to get burned, but my stupid arms just wouldn’t seem to reach.

“Here,” Rhys said quietly. “Let me do that for you.”

“Oh,” I replied, my voice breathier than intended. “Sure.”

A second later, he took the bottle from me, his fingers sliding along mine before he squirted a small amount of sunscreen into the palm of his hand. I watched him, my pulse spiking, then turned around to grant him access to my back. I didn’t need to hold my hair because it was already tied up, but I stilled when I felt him brush aside a few of the strands that had fallen free.

Next, his large, warm hand spread across the centre of my back, and I sucked in a sharp breath. I knew he heard when his hand paused before he asked, “You okay?”

I turned my head slightly, glancing at him over my shoulder. “Mm-hmm.”

A moment passed as our gazes held, and goose bumps rose on my arms. I hoped he didn’t notice. It was startling to realise that this quiet, unassuming boy had an effect on me no one else had before. There was just something about him. His energy drew me in. And his eyes, the way he was looking at me right then, it made my pulse spike in a new and unexpected way.

Rhys resumed applying the sun screen. The sun warming my back was nothing compared to his hands. The salty sea air filled my senses, combined with the coconut-scented sunscreen. Seagulls cawed in the distance and nearby families laughed and chattered; kids squealed in delight as they built sandcastles.

Rhys’ fingertips traced down my spine then travelled over the curve of each shoulder blade, his thumbs rubbing in a distractingly soothing motion over the expanse of exposed skin. His warmth and closeness seemed to be everywhere as I momentarily closed my eyes, lost to sensation. I sucked in another sharp breath when his fingers glided over the nape of my neck. His hand stilled for the briefest second before resuming.

I felt every sweep of his fingers across my skin as he quietly rubbed in the cream. Too soon, his touch was gone, and he handed me back the sunscreen bottle just as his phone began vibrating.

Yet again, he pulled it out and glowered, but this time, he didn’t end the call. Instead, he answered, “Yeah?” A silence followed, and I could just about make out a gruff, angry voice talking to him on the other end. Something squeezed in my stomach. I didn’t like the tone of whoever was talking to him—his father, most likely.

Rhys looked stressed, his profile in relief against the sunny, sandy backdrop of the beach. He ran a hand through his hair. “Look, I’ll be there in half an hour, okay?”

The gruff voice responded with something else before Rhys hung up and let out a weary sigh.

“Everything okay?” I asked, a little worried.

Rhys nodded. “It’s fine.” His expression turned apologetic. “I have to go. Can you let the others know something came up, and I’ll see them later?”

“Sure, of course,” I replied, wanting to ask more questions, offer help if he needed it, but we didn’t know each other that well yet, and I shouldn’t pry.

Rhys packed up his things and stood. “See you, Charli,” he said, seeming regretful to be leaving.

“Yeah, see you,” I replied as he went.

I watched him walk back in the direction where we’d left the car until he slowly disappeared into the crowd, all the while wondering what was going on with his dad and why he’d had to leave so abruptly.