Quiet Longing (Quiet Love #2)

8.

Rhys

The room smelled like her.

When Charli had leaned into me earlier tonight, confessing that she thought I smelled good, it was mostly surprising because she smelled really good to me, too. A subtle mix of honey, almonds, and coconut. I couldn’t tell if it was her shampoo or some kind of perfume, but the scent was etched in my brain.

When Tristan suggested we hide out here, I’d tried to argue, but it was useless because he was right. Charli’s room was probably the one place Derek wouldn’t think to look for us. He certainly wasn’t going to barge in. He had too much respect for female privacy. I saw it in the way he behaved around his sister, always keeping an eye out for danger while at the same time giving her space to be herself.

I should’ve said no as soon as Tristan approached me with his prank idea, but Charli had left the party early with Nuala, and I was bored and aimless without her. So, reluctantly, I agreed. That was my first mistake. Tristan got it into his head that playing a prank on the birthday boy would be the perfect way to top off the special day. The problem was, Tristan wasn’t very good at pranks. He didn’t fully think through all the possible ways they might go wrong.

Now, I was an accomplice to his foolishness.

“Well,” Charli said, her voice husky from sleep. “Tell me why you guys are hiding.”

I felt bad about waking her, but I was also a bit mesmerised by her messy hair and puffy lips. The oversized, loose T-shirt she wore skimmed her thighs and hinted that she wasn’t wearing a bra. The way her eyes remained at half-mast, not fully alert yet. It was what she’d look like in the morning in a dream world where we’d spent the night together.

I knew it was never going to happen, but I could at least enjoy the fantasy.

Earlier, at the party, she’d been playful and surprisingly flirty. It had taken me completely off guard. I’d mistakenly thought she’d been toying with me, making me believe she was interested only so she could later reject me. It was a stupid thought, born of insecurity. Charli didn’t possess that sort of cruelty. At least, she didn’t seem like she did.

When she revealed she liked me and genuinely enjoyed my company, I was both relieved and disappointed. Relieved because she wasn’t playing a game and disappointed because I knew “liking me” was all there was to it. She was comfortable around me. I was safe . The sort of bloke she could chat with, have some amusing banter, but I wasn’t the one she’d choose romantically.

No, that would be some other lucky bastard.

I’d never felt as comfortable with a girl as I did around her. She’d somehow managed to penetrate the ache inside me. It was an ache I’d barely even known was there before I met her. I wasn’t entirely sure what it meant, but it felt a lot like longing. Longing for connection, for someone to understand me, to know and accept all the things I normally kept hidden. I wanted to show her all of me, the good, the bad, and the ugly, because some voice at the back of my head said she’d accept me even if she knew it all.

It would be dangerous to trust that voice, though, because there was a large chance her feelings were platonic. A friendship was all she intended, one that would likely end when she went home in two months’ time.

“First off, you need to lower your voice,” Tristan whispered as he went to sit on Charli’s bed.

“Okay,” she replied, hushed. “What was the prank?”

Tristan and I shared a look, and I knew at that moment he regretted it just as much as I did. Perhaps even more so. We were both wracked with guilt because the person the prank was intended for—Aidan—wasn’t the one who came to be on the receiving end of it.

Just thinking about what happened made me feel sick.

“Well, it was a pretty straightforward prank,” Tristan whispered while Charli glanced at me. She noticed me standing awkwardly at the foot of her bed and reached out. Her warm fingers wrapped around mine as she pulled me over to sit. I went willingly, obviously, because I was like a doting puppy being led by its owner when it came to her.

“We filled a bucket with ice water and situated it over the door to the pantry so when Aidan went to get more beers, the ice water would fall on his head and drench him,” Tristan explained.

Charli glanced between the two of us, eyebrows raised, “And you thought he was going to find that funny?”

“Hey, it’s kids’ stuff compared to the pranks he’s pulled over the years. On my birthday last spring, Aidan hid in the front seat of my dad’s Audi, the one he was letting me take driving lessons in. Aidan let the car roll down the hill of our driveway while getting Theo to run into the house and shout at me that I’d forgotten to pull up the handbrake. Aidan only stopped the car about an inch away from crashing into the front gate.”

“That’s fucked up,” Charli said, her voice kept low.

“Right? I nearly had a heart attack thinking the car was going to crash. Dad would’ve blown a gasket. I figured Aidan deserved a little payback.”

“And your payback didn’t go to plan? What happened? Did Derek get drenched instead of Aidan?”

“No, worse. Milly O’Shea, the girl Derek is obsessed with, walked into the pantry and got soaked instead. Milly’s the tiniest, sweetest girl you’ll ever meet, and she immediately burst into tears.”

“Oh, no,” Charli breathed, her eyes widening in horror.

“She fled the party, and Derek was fit to be tied,” I put in. “He’d seen Tristan and me conspiring earlier, so he put it together immediately that we were behind it.”

“Which is why we fled and are now in hiding. So, thank you for providing sanctuary,” Tristan finished.

“Well, I just hope I don’t get punished, too, for harbouring fugitives,” Charli said with a hint of humour. “That poor girl, though. She must’ve been mortified.”

Tristan grimaced. “She’s such a shy person. Derek was even surprised she came to the party because she rarely goes to stuff like that. And as you can imagine, his protective instincts went into overdrive. Right now, he wants to punish us for upsetting his precious Milly, but I think if we can avoid him until the morning, he’ll have calmed down.”

“Hold on,” Charli replied. “You two want to hide here all night ?”

“We’ll owe you one, cuz, seriously. Please don’t kick us out. Besides, your bed is gigantic. There’s more than enough room for all three of us.”

Charli blinked at him, her gaze flicking to me as a hint of red coloured her cheeks. She touched the side of her neck. “Um, I’m not sure if—"

“I can sleep on the armchair,” I volunteered, motioning to the chair in the far corner of the room. I didn’t plan on making Charli uncomfortable by trying to sleep in her bed even if it was gigantic.

“No, it’s fine,” she said, shaking her head. “My bed is big enough for us all to have our space, and you’ll hurt your neck sleeping on the chair.”

“Great, so it’s agreed,” Tristan said, immediately kicking off his shoes, then pulling off his jumper and jeans before hopping into the unused side of Charli’s bed. I inhaled sharply, about to insist on sleeping on the chair, even if it did mess up my neck, but then Charli grabbed my hand again, and every logical thought fled my brain.

“Go on, get in. You look exhausted,” she murmured.

Tristan was already asleep, snoring his head off. Charli glanced at him in amusement then whispered to me, “Clearly, his conscience isn’t too weighed down by the prank if he can fall asleep that easily.”

“Right, I’m going to be wracked with guilt for weeks,” I replied, whispering, too. “Milly was in my class in primary school. The girl used to be so shy she wouldn’t even read out loud when the teacher called on her.”

“Oh no,” Charli said, her eyes downturned in sympathy. “What a mess. Maybe you guys could apologise to her in the morning?”

“Yeah,” I sighed. “If Derek even lets us anywhere near her.”

I still hesitated. Charli motioned to my clothes. “Hurry up and get undressed. You can’t sleep in all that.”

Feeling a tightness coiling in my chest at the thought of lying down next to her, I swallowed thickly and nodded, my hands going to my shirt first. Next, I unlaced my boots and set them at the foot of the bed. Charli was still waiting, watching me undress.

“You can get in. I’ll just be a minute,” I said, a bit stiff.

“Oh, no, I’m not sleeping next to Tristan. He looks like the type to starfish and steal all the blankets.” I almost smiled because I’d shared a bed with Tristan once or twice over the years, and he was exactly that type.

Charli looked away, giving me some privacy as I stripped down to my boxer briefs and T-shirt. I moved past her, our arms brushing as I climbed into the bed. She followed suit, sliding me a pillow, which I took silently as she reached over to turn off the lamp.

Then we were in darkness, and all I could focus on was her soft breathing. She was on her side, turned away from me, her hair tumbled across her pillow. My eyes wandered over the shadowed curve of her neck and shoulder, the rest of her body hidden under the duvet.

Lying there, I was even more surrounded by her scent. It had engrained itself into my memory like my brain had decided it was important somehow. Being around her made me forget about all the things I should have been worrying about like my parents, the house, how we were going to arrange our lives now that Mam was determined to leave Dad. I expected she’d want a divorce, but I also knew getting him to sign the papers was going to be near impossible.

I must’ve been lost in my thoughts for a while because Charli’s breathing had evened out, her shoulders rising and falling as she slept. I wasn’t likely to get much rest since Tristan was snoring like a foghorn behind me. It was a miracle Charli had managed to drift off. I closed my eyes, trying to clear my mind of stressful thoughts, when, suddenly, she shifted, turning over to face me. She was still asleep, just closer. I’d had my arm raised above my head, and I froze when she cuddled into me, resting her head on my chest.

Ah, hell.

This was awkward.

I stared at her, my eyes adjusted to the dark. Her thick, silky hair brushed my chin, causing my pulse to spike. I’d only been this close to a girl once or twice in my life, and I was panicking a little. Charli moved again, making a cute little noise in her sleep as her arm came to rest across my stomach.

Great, I was getting a semi.

I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to think of un-erotic things, like mouldy fruit or wearing wet socks. It worked a little, and I managed to keep my dick at bay, but my nose was still full of her scent, her breath fanning across my neck.

My arm started to ache so I lowered it. Charli immediately snuggled in deeper as though drawn by my warmth. She was so fucking pretty it hurt. So soft . If this was all I ever got, that was fine. I could live with being her friend.

I hoped.

With how edgy I felt, it was a miracle I managed to fall asleep. I wasn’t sure how many hours I was out for. When I woke up, I was drowsy, having momentarily forgotten where I was until I became aware of the warm body nestled in my arms. Fuck. Charli and I had moved while we slept, but it was me who’d gravitated towards her. I was spooning her, my hand splayed out across her stomach, my front flush with her curvy backside. I needed to move, preferably without waking her.

Because I was also sporting some serious morning wood.

Then, before I had the chance to untangle us, she shifted, and I hissed in a breath when her arse rubbed against me. I remained still, staring at the back of her head, frozen with indecision. Then she turned just enough to look at me, her beautiful hazel eyes confused and sleepy as she took me in though she didn’t move away. Our gazes locked. She seemed … oddly fascinated, her focus wandering over me. I drank her in, the way a few loose strands of hair framed her face, her smooth, olive skin.

For the briefest second, my eyes lowered to her breasts but I quickly dragged my gaze away.

“Sorry,” I finally managed, swallowing the thick lump of arousal wedged in my throat.

“It’s okay,” she whispered then finally shifted away before slipping out of the bed.

I was unsure how to feel as she went into her bathroom. She hadn’t seemed bothered about our position waking up, but I also couldn’t read her thoughts. There was no way she hadn’t felt my cock eagerly pressing against her arse, and I was so fucking embarrassed I didn’t want to think about it.

Tristan was still out cold. I heard water running and expected Charli was taking a shower. That was the last thing I needed to be visualising. I climbed from the bed and quickly dressed. I’d rather deal with Derek’s wrath than face Charli again. I’d just end up rambling more apologies and making myself look a fool.

I found Derek in his room, looking like he’d been up all night fuming. His eyes narrowed as soon as he saw me.

“Where the fuck have you been? And where’s my brother?”

“Hiding from you,” I replied. “Shit, Derek. I’m sorry. I never should’ve gone along with Tristan’s plan, but it was meant for Aidan.”

“Yeah, well, Aidan wasn’t the one who got drenched in fucking ice water. Milly was left shivering and humiliated. I had to beg her to let me walk her home. She barely leaves the house outside of going to school as it is, and the first time I manage to convince her to come hang out at a party, this happens. It’s unforgiveable.”

“I know it is. And Tristan and I both feel like shit about it. We’ll go to her house today and apologise in person.”

“No, she’ll hate that, just …” he trailed off, and I saw his worry etched into his features.

“You really care about her, don’t you?”

For a second, he looked a little bit helpless. “Things have been tough for her lately. Her Dad’s been sick, and her mother has to work two jobs to keep things going. Milly’s been taking care of her father and her two little sisters for months. I thought the party would be good for her. She could take a night off and just relax.” He cast me a cloudy look. “Obviously, it didn’t end up that way.”

“Fuck,” I swore, dragging a hand down my face. “I feel terrible. There must be some way we can make it up to her. Maybe Tristan and I could do some work over at her house, mow the lawn, dig out weeds, power wash the driveway,” I suggested.

Derek perked up a little. “That’s not a bad idea. Her dad normally takes care of those things, but he hasn’t been able to, and the front of her house needs some work.”

“So, we’ll go over there and freshen the place up,” I said. “Show Milly we really are sorry. It’s better than just saying it, right?”

Derek nodded, looking mildly assuaged.

Working at the hotel, I was used to hard labour. Tristan, on the other hand, was probably going to bitch and moan throughout the whole thing, but he’d do it, especially if it meant making it up to Derek. He looked up to him a lot, and the last thing Tristan wanted was to fall out with his big brother.

“Okay,” Derek said. “Wherever he’s skulking, go find Tristan and tell him the plan. We’ll leave in thirty minutes.”

“Can I at least grab a change of clothes first?”

“Yeah, but you don’t have time to shower. There’s no point since you’ll be sweating by the time you’re finished today.”

I changed into a clean outfit and washed up before going to find Tristan. Thankfully, Charli wasn’t in her room when I knocked. The lazy fucker was still snoozing away in her bed. When I managed to wake him up, he was less than enthused about how we were going to make things up to Milly, but he reluctantly agreed to it.

Mainly, I was just glad to get out of the house for the day and avoid Charli. She probably thought I was a horny creep with my morning boner.

God.

Maybe she wouldn’t want to even be my friend anymore. The thought stung. It bloody hurt .

Derek drove us to Milly’s, a bunch of gardening and cleaning equipment packed into the boot of the car. She lived in a modest semi-detached house with not too long of a driveway, but I could see how the front of the house needed work. This was the first time Derek had mentioned her father being unwell. Tristan and I hung back while Derek went to knock on the door. It took a while before anyone answered.

Milly appeared, her eyes looking like she’d been crying for a while last night. Hell, and I thought I couldn’t feel like more of a piece of shit. I looked to Tristan, and he wore an equally guilty expression. Derek bent his head to the petite brunette, speaking softly to her as he reached out to tuck some hair behind her ear. She seemed stiff at first but then slowly nodded when Derek motioned to us over his shoulder.

Tristan and I came forward, telling her how sorry we were, how the prank was never intended for her. Then Derek went inside the house with Milly, and we started to work on the front drive.

By the time we were done, all I wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep. The house was quiet when we got back, and we went our separate ways to shower. I’d just emerged when Derek came into the room.

“There you are,” he said. “Charli’s been looking for you.”

He didn’t sound pleased, and I remembered his warnings about his cousin being off limits. Derek must’ve noticed we’d been spending time together, especially with how she’d perched beside me on the armchair at the party last night.

“Listen, Derek, there’s nothing—”

“Just be careful, okay?” he said, cutting me off. It struck me as odd because his concern didn’t seem to be for Charli. It was directed at me .

“Uh, yeah, I mean, I’m always careful,” I said, frowning.

Derek nodded stiffly then went into the bathroom.

Self-consciousness bit when I realised why he was concerned for me. He clearly saw I was crushing on his cousin, and the crush wasn’t mutual. With Aidan and Theo, Derek would be worried about Charli getting taken advantage of, but with me, it was the opposite. He knew I wasn’t a player, knew that, aside from one or two kisses, I hadn’t ever even been with a girl. My best friend thought I was going to get my heart broken like a lovesick puppy, and it was fucking embarrassing to be honest.

Trying to push down the feeling of mortification, I wondered what Charli wanted me for. Then I remembered how we’d woken up this morning. Ah, hell. She didn’t want to talk about that, did she?

Well, I guess I should face the music , I thought as I headed downstairs.

When I entered the kitchen, Charli stood by the counter arranging a giant plate of snacks.

“Rhys,” she said, smiling.

Okay, a smile was a good sign.

I scratched the back of my head. “Hey, Derek said you were looking for me?”

“Yes, I heard what you and Tristan did to make things up to Milly. It’s such a sweet gesture. Did she seem less upset when you saw her?”

“A little. She seemed to appreciate us doing the chores,” I replied.

“Well, I thought you were going to be exhausted when you got home, so I put this plate together for us. I found the Xbox you mentioned, in the playroom.” She waggled her eyebrows like she considered it a funny name for a room. “They don’t have Fallout , but I figured we could play Mario Kart then pig out on these snacks.”

Eh, was I dreaming? She was too fucking perfect.

I must’ve been standing there for a while, unsure how to respond, because Charli continued, “You said we could game together this weekend, remember? It’s okay if you’re too tired.”

I shook my head. “I’m not too tired. That sounds great.”

Her smile widened. “Cool, come on. I’ve set everything up.”

She moved to lift the plate, but I intercepted her. “I’ll carry that.”

Charli appeared to flush, her eyes flickering to mine and then away. “Thanks.”

I followed her to the room, where the game was already running. Setting the plate down on a table, I turned to Charli, gently touching her arm to get her attention.

Her gaze rose in question.

I wasn’t sure why, but I felt like I needed to broach the elephant in the room. I just wanted to make sure I hadn’t made her uncomfortable that morning.

“About earlier,” I began, and her eyes widened, a flush rising in her cheeks again.

“Oh, Rhys, you don’t have to—”

“I didn’t mean for us to wake up like that. And I certainly never intended to—”

She lifted her hand, her delicate fingers meeting my chest. “You don’t have to explain yourself. I know how the male anatomy works, and that certain things occur first thing in the morning. Really, it’s fine. It’s probably my fault. If I sleep in bed with anyone, I tend to get a little snuggly.” She gave a chuckle, and I was struck with a pang of jealousy at the idea of her snuggling with other lads. “That’s what my friend Gwyn says anyway,” she finished, and instant relief set in. She snuggled with her friend; that was all. Or at least that was what I was determined to believe because imagining anything else would just have the uncomfortable jealousy hurtling back.

I swallowed and nodded. “You’re sure you’re okay? Because I’ve been feeling like a fucking creep.”

“Oh my goodness, no! Don’t feel that way. I wasn’t uncomfortable, seriously. I know you’re a good guy, Rhys.”

“All right,” I breathed, feeling mildly better.

“Now, can we please get gaming? I’m dying to dig into these snacks and I know I’m going to beat your ass at Mario Kart .”

Heat spread across my chest. This girl. There just something so … amazing about her. She made me feel like a better person than I was. Maybe she wouldn’t think I was such a good guy if she knew the thoughts I’d had about her. The daydreams while we stood scrubbing dishes together at the hotel.

Mustering a smile in return, I replied, “Challenge accepted.”