Raw Bloody Power

Chapter 31

31

SAY IT

Ivory

Xena hops over Katana and plops herself right next to me in bed, pulling me out of the mental Rolodex of memories as she drops her head on my chest. She’s getting so big and she’s so damn smart, an emotional support pup in the making. I peck her little black nose and stroke the top of her head. “Spoiled brat.”

She huffs as if she can understand me and closes her eyes, something I should be doing, too. But I can’t. It’s well after midnight, and still, sleep eludes me. I promised myself there would be no repeats after the parking garage indiscretion, yet I let Rio have his wicked way tonight. He caught me off guard, and I was useless to stop him. Hell, I didn’t even try. I succumbed to his advances after nothing but a few mind-numbing kisses and granted him this sense of ownership he no longer has the right to .

“I’m so fucking stupid,” I whisper to myself, staring into the darkness of my room.

More like sated and sore, my subconscious whispers.

Facts, though . He destroys me every time he puts his hands on me, leaving me satisfied and hurting in places I don’t think about on the daily, and still wanting so much more when it’s all said and done. Somehow, it’s never enough, though, and?—

“Ugh.” I groan into my hands, dragging them down my face in frustration. “Stop it. Stop thinking about it. Stop thinking about him.” Blindly reaching for my phone on the nightstand, I swipe my way into my apps and open up my Kindle.

Book boyfriends are great distractions and always help me get to sleep.

Until I’m halfway through chapter one of this morally grey romance, that is, and realize the MMC is literally Rio on paper.

Even the book world is against me, apparently.

Tapping back into my library, I scroll down to one of my favorite comfort reads—a badass underground fighter who’s deliciously possessive, and kinda, sorta, maybe has BPD—and settle in for the opening scene. The heroine sits on the outskirts of the ring with her best friend, watching two fighters brutally go at it. Unbeknownst to her, one of them is her future man. I’m already anticipating the moment they meet; it makes me fan myself every time.

Unknown

You’re making it really hard to hate you .

The drop down at the top of my screen interrupts my excitement, though, and has me gasping so loud in the silence of my bedroom, poor Xena stirs again.

He’s awake, too…

I spend several long moments debating whether or not to reply as Xena huffs in annoyance and scoots her way over to lay on Draco instead.

Pros: I can redraw a new line and remind him this needs to stop. It’s not good for either one of us.

Cons: Talking to him. Every interaction only brings us closer, blurring out the past with such ease, sometimes it feels like a bad dream. Like it never even happened and eleven years didn’t fly by.

Like he’s still mine and I’m still his…

His palm touches down on my face in a gentle yet purposefully delicious slap, the pads of his fingers digging into my cheeks. “Then look at me while I bury my cock inside you like the little slut you are,” he demands, easing the tip in and right back out.

I whine but hold his stare like a vise, my lips parted, chest heaving. He waits just a second longer, likely reveling in the way I tremble against him in need. A singular thrust and he’s in, filling me until he bottoms out. There’s no fighting the gasps that blasts free, my eyes widening as my nails scrape the back of his neck.

“Again. Do it again,” I beg.

“What? This?” Repeating the same motion, he pulls out to the tip and slams back in, dropping my head back around a ragged moan.

“Yes.”

I blink out of the flashback and suck in a heap of air. Yeahhh. Definitely have to redraw the line, scribble over it a million times until there’s no confusing what it is or maybe even go over it with permanent marker. We can’t do this.

“We can’t fucking do this,” I mutter to myself, my thumbs tapping across the screen in a speedy resolve as the heartbeat of my clit thumps wildly.

Down, girl. No more.

Me

Same.

We can’t keep doing this. It has to stop.

Can’t do that.

Why?

Your pussy is my therapy.

I wish I could say I’m offended, objectified even, but the smirk quirking my lips says anything but.

Go call Nadia, or Gigi, or Rissa.

I don’t want them. I want YOU.

MAKE yourself want them. We can’t fall back into this pattern again.

We really can’t…

It’s why I haven’t even added his contact to my phone. Any trace of Rio is dangerous for my health.

Give me one good reason why.

Because it broke me the last time.

Enemies with benefits has a nice ring to it tho, don’t you think?

Um, no? How do you get to continue blowing up my life but have a fast pass to fuck me whenever you want? Make it make sense.

Because you want it.

I don’t.

Fucking liar .

Didn’t seem that way earlier when I was eating your pussy like a five course meal…

Moment of weakness. You caught me off guard.

So you’ve had a moment of weakness 3x?

Lmao okay.

What if we call truce?

We tried that already. You played me, remember?

I mean permanently.

Wouldn’t exactly file under enemies with benefits then, would it?

Reformed enemies with benefits?

Lol you’re ridiculous.

Ridiculously obsessed with you.

My insides could out perform a circus right now, flipping and spinning wildly at that last reply. It’s so dumb, so fucking dumb, but I’m cheesing like an absolute idiot, trying to play it off and miserably failing at setting any sort of boundary or fending him off.

Like always…

Ridiculously insane is more like it.

How so?

Be so for real rn. Forget Sweet Cheeks and my dad’s shit. You hurt my brother.

Repercussions for your actions. Your boyfriend went after mine.

Get fucked, Rio. HE’S NOT MY BOYFRIEND.

Relax, Princess. Ik he’s not.

STOP IT.

Why are you yelling at me?

Cause you’re calling me that stupid name again.

Cause it works you up. My favorite kind of foreplay.

I hate you sm.

I’m waiting for the “No, you don’t” reply to come through, but a call pops up instead. Against my better judgement, I tap the green button and lift the phone to my ear. “What?”

“You’re so full of shit, that’s what,” he chuckles, the sound infinitely deeper and darker, rougher around the edges in that undeniably sexy way that could incinerate any woman’s panties. Mine almost go up in flames.

Fuck my life.

Swallowing down the rush of desire that floods me, I shift onto my side. “How am I full of shit?”

“You stopped hating me the moment I shoved my dick inside you, that’s how.”

“False. I hated you even more in that moment because it felt so good.”

One-hundred percent true, too—you know, for the record and all that.

“What was the turning point, then?” he hedges.

“There was no turning point. I still hate you,” I retort.

“Ivory, please.” Almost sounds like he laughs, but it’s too hushed for me to be certain. “You couldn’t pay me a million dollars to believe that. You’re as caught up in this as I am.”

I am.

I know I am, which is why I don’t answer. I can’t, my lips smashing together thinner than paper. Admitting it is like signing my death sentence. There’s no universe where Rio and I can exist as one. I mean, we were star-crossed all those years ago, destined to fail. Why would it be any different now? Picking up where we left off is a recipe for disaster, our untimely crash and burn inevitable.

“It’s too good, Petal. You know it is,” he says after a long bout of silence, his voice soft.

My eyes squeeze as tightly as my lips. “Don’t call me that,” I whisper, earning me a throaty laugh I can definitely make out this time.

“Now Petal’s off the table, too?”

“Everything’s off the table. We have to stop, Rio.”

“I have zero intention of stopping.” A rustling resounds through the line, like a body shifting beneath the sheets.

Just imagining Rio in his bed, the hard, sculpted lines of his body bare, tattoos on display, has me almost foaming at the mouth. “We have to, period point blank.”

“Why? Tell me what’s standing in the way of me having you so I can do us both a favor and get rid of the problem. Is it Koshka?” he questions.

Of course he would think Benedikt is the problem. “Do you suffer from memory loss or something?”

“No. I remember everything. You fucked my best friend, we split, had a petty little war eleven years later that should’ve been infinitely worse if we weren’t so goddamn obsessed with each other still…then we fucked again and now I’m over it. I want you, Ivory.”

Hearing him say it aloud— you fucked my best friend— hurts. A lot—even after all these years. I suppose that’s because we never talked about it. He didn’t let me explain, didn’t give me the opportunity to prove myself innocent. He simply took Jonathan’s word as bible and left me to rot in the dust.

“You really still believe I did it?” I ask, and I can all but see the cock of his brow.

“Did what?”

“...Jonathan?”

Rio sighs. It’s not profound or irate in any way, but rather, exhausted…as if he’s asked himself this question a million times, too. “I don’t know what to think anymore, and honestly, I don’t fucking care at this point. We were kids. Kids do dumb shit.”

“What about Sandro?” I roll onto my back again, staring up at the ceiling. “We weren’t kids then. He was seriously hurt.”

“I know…” he pauses, expelling another breath. “And I’m sorry. I knew better than that. I was just so…angry. Dino might be able to walk, you know, but he also might be walking straight into juvie.”

My shoulders crawl up to my ears as guilt sinks its claws in deep. I feel like shit knowing I had a hand in possibly ruining a child’s life. That was never my intention when I agreed to join forces with Benedikt. If I’d known he was going to do something like that, I would’ve stopped him, suggested another course of action.

“God, I’m so sorry.” Emotion clogs my throat. “I had no idea Benedikt would do something like that. If I did, I?—”

“There, we apologized. Can we move on now?”

My jaw almost unhinges at his casual interjection. “ Rio!” I laugh, half amused, half frustrated because what the fuck?

“What?” he chuckles, too,.

Rolling face front into my pillow, I mumble a, “Why are you making this so difficult” into the silk.

“Because I want you, and I know damn well you want me, too.”

“I don’t w?—”

His laughter cuts off me, the words jamming against my tongue. “God, if I was there right now, you’d have my cock down your throat, shutting you the fuck up. Quit the bullshit, Ivory. I wasn’t born yesterday.”

The grit in his tone. The visual he’s painted. I’m mewling before I can stop myself.

“You like that, don’t you?” He heard me loud and clear. “You like when I’m rough with you, when I treat you like my personal slut and fuck you so hard you can’t breathe.”

Yes.

“Rio, stop.”

“Why? ‘Cause you know I’m right? You almost squirted on me earlier. Did you know that? I could feel it.”

Yes, again. I was so close. If he’d had me on my back, I would’ve exploded like a geyser. “Rio…”

“I was five seconds away from pulling out to taste it.”

That word—t aste —rematerializes the sight of him between my legs, eating me out on my fucking work counter. His mouth is magic, that tongue of his wicked, expert. I have to roll over and fist the sheets to avoid sliding a hand between my legs…

“Rio, I swear to God.”

“What’s the matter, Petal? Turned on already?” he murmurs all too knowingly, bobbing my head subtly regardless of the fact he’s on the other side of the phone.

“You’re not fighting fair,” I breathe.

“I never have. That’s pussy’s mine, baby. Just admit it already.”

It’s yours.

It’s always been yours.

“Good night , Rio. I’m going to sleep.” My legs quake as thoughts of what’d he’d do if I actually admitted such things fly to the forefront.

“Go on. Be a good girl and admit it,” he presses cockily.

“No.”

“‘It’s yours, Rio. I’m all yours.’ Say it,” he demands, my cheeks burning hotter than hell.

Click.