Redeem Me (Beckett Brothers #2)

13. Ivy

Chapter Thirteen

IVY

Caelon’s lips and tongue devour me like he’s enjoying this as much as I am. However good he is with his fingers, his oral skills are sublime.

‘Do you do this to all your nannies?’ I pant, my legs trembling.

His tongue pauses and I curse my big mouth for talking once again. ‘No.’ His voice is low and guttural.

I grip the edge of his desk, my head inches away from his computer screen, his keyboard between my knees. I hope to fuck it’s waterproof because I am saturated.

‘I’m so close,’ I hiss, bucking my ass back against his face. His fingers grab my hips and still them as his tongue slows to almost a stop.

‘You don’t come until I say you can.’ Every word causes his lips to brush over my clit, sending shock waves radiating down my thighs.

‘I won’t be able to help myself,’ I whisper.

‘Now you know how I feel, faced with this sight all damn day.’ He slaps my ass with the palm of his hand, hard enough to sting in the sexiest way, while his other hand reaches for my breast, squeezing and kneading.

‘Let me take the edge off for you.’ I buck my hips backwards again.

‘No.’ His fingers still my hips and his mouth returns to my pussy. He offers one long, slow lick that sets my legs shaking again. ‘Next time you think about going out and getting fucked, I want you to think about this. Be a good girl and go up to your room and play with yourself instead. Got it?’

‘Yes.’ I’d agree to absolutely anything right now. Anything. The need to come is overriding all rationale.

‘Good girl,’ he purrs, slipping two fingers into my core and pumping as his lips capture my clit. ‘Now that’s settled, you can come now, Ivy, darling. Come all over my face,’ he commands, and I’m gone, spiralling into an earth-shattering release that shakes every cell. Explosives detonate from my core, sending shock waves in every direction. White hot pleasure bursts through my entire body, and as he continues to lap at me, I shake and shatter on him.

Even when I stop shuddering, his tongue still works me, licking, savouring, cleaning. Eventually, he stills, gives my ass another playful slap and then turns me over until I’m sitting, legs spread on his desk again.

He inspects my pussy carefully. Another woman might feel shy, but after having him tiptoe around me, barely looking at me for three weeks, being the focus of his unwavering perusal is hot as fuck.

‘I did mention I’m more than capable of cleaning up my own messes.’ He sounds oddly satisfied.

‘If you keep looking at me like that, there will be another one really fucking soon.’ My breath is ragged from my release.

His low chuckle resounds through the air. ‘Greedy girl. Now get out of here before I do something I’ll regret. ’

‘Like what?’ I challenge him, parting my legs wider in a less than subtle invitation.

‘Like fuck my best friend’s sister.’

‘I won’t tell if you don’t,’ I promise.

‘It’s never going to happen, Ivy.’ His dark eyes fall to something beside his computer. I turn my head to see what he’s staring at. My gaze lands on a picture of his wife.

I swallow thickly, slide off his desk, pick my dress up from the floor and pull it over my head. The cold sting of rejection rapidly replaces my post-orgasm glow. Tall, Dark and Tortured is obviously not over Isabella.

It shouldn’t matter.

He’s my boss, not my boyfriend, for God’s sake.

This was supposed to be a release and nothing more.

The problem is, I want more. I’ve been crushing on him ever since I arrived. I want him inside me so badly it hurts.

And it’s never going to happen.

I need to put it, and him, out of my head once and for all.

‘You know, I might go out, after all…’

He glowers. ‘That wasn’t the deal, Ivy.’

‘Deals are broken and renegotiated all the time.’ I shrug, strutting out of his office, leaving my lingerie lying on his floor.

Before the door clicks behind me, I hear him mutter, ‘She’s going to be the actual death of me…’ To whom, I can only imagine.

An hour later, I tiptoe out of my room. The sun has set, and the sky is an eclectic mix of deep pinks and purple hues.

My Uber should arrive any minute. I’m not going out to find a man, but Caelon doesn’t need to know that. I can’t just sit around here and wait to see if he’ll throw me a bone – pun intended. After what just happened in his office, it’s better if I put some distance between us, for a few hours at least.

I can’t think straight when he’s near.

It’s not natural. I’ve never known attraction like it. It’s so visceral. So primal. So animalistic. Hell, I don’t even particularly like the guy, yet every bone in my body longs to jump his. The way my body responds to his touch is like nothing I’ve ever experienced before, nor am ever likely to again, unfortunately. Which is why I need to get out of here.

I felt used by the way he dismissed me after such soul-shattering intimacy. Even though I wanted that intimacy more than I wanted anything before. He warned me that was all it would be. I thought I could handle it. But I thought wrong.

Which is why he’s right. It can never happen again.

I smooth a hand over my black silk. It’s a short number that I picked up in Macy’s last summer. I don’t particularly miss the States, but I miss the shopping. I miss hanging out with my nanny friends at Union Square. I miss Saturday nights drinking in Irish bars with other Irish people who are living away from home. I miss adult company. I’ve been away so long, I don’t have any real friends in Dublin. Maybe it’s time I made some new ones.

I check on the kids briefly. Orla is asleep with her hands thrown above her head and Owen is clinging onto his favourite teddy, unable to part with it even in his dreams. I creep down the stairs, listening for any movement, but I’m greeted with silence.

‘Going somewhere?’ Caelon’s low, velvety voice greets me through the twilight. He steps forwards from the shadows.

I jump. Has he been waiting here, on guard, this entire time?

‘Yes, I am, as a matter of fact.’ I straighten my spine. I’m only five foot five, but with these five-inch stilettos, I don’t have to crane my neck to meet his glare.

‘And where would that be, exactly?’ He positions his body between mine and the exit.

‘For a drink in the city, not that it’s any of your business. I’ll be back long before the kids wake up.’ The scent of his cologne wafts through the air, deep and rich and sensual.

‘And how do you plan on getting to the city?’ Gold flecks light his irises as he inches his body closer to mine.

‘I called an Uber. It’ll be here any minute.’

He places a palm on my lower back and guides me towards the front door. Tingles shoot up my spine. My treacherous nipples stiffen at his touch. He eyes my dress and smirks. He fights dirty, and he doesn’t even try to hide it.

He opens the front door for me, and I inhale a lungful of balmy, fresh air. Headlights swing up to the gate, but when I step out onto the step, Caelon catches my wrist. Heat sizzles over my skin. His eyes lock on mine.

‘Don’t go,’ he bites out, and I glimpse a rare flash of vulnerability.

‘What?’ The man all but kicked me out of his office an hour earlier after I offered myself to him naked.

‘Don’t go,’ he repeats, slightly softer this time. That tortured look flashes in his eyes.

My anger melts. I’m still a sucker for a tortured bad boy. ‘On one condition.’

‘I can’t have sex with you.’ He shakes his head briskly.

‘I wasn’t going to ask you to,’ I huff. One rejection today is enough. ‘Have a drink with me.’

‘A drink? Haven’t we had enough?’

‘One more, for the road.’

‘We’ve already established you’re not hitting the road. You’re not going anywhere, Ivy.’

‘Which is why you should have a nightcap with me.’ My shoulders sag, the fight falling from them. ‘I like spending time with your kids, but I could do with some adult conversation from time to time. I don’t have many friends. I’ve been away so long, they’ve all moved on, formed new friendship groups. Have a drink with me, please.’

His shoulders relax a fraction and his lips curl up into a half-smirk. ‘I suppose it’s easier than tying you to your bedposts.’

I press my thighs together. What a visual. Another pair of panties ruined. Not fucking helpful. ‘That’s my ultimate fantasy,’ I hiss.

His eyelids squeeze shut like he’s forcing away the image. ‘Why am I not surprised?’

‘I’ll speak to the driver.’ I start towards the driveway.

‘No need. I already told Damon to send him away with a tip.’ There’s a smug edge to his voice.

My mouth falls open. ‘But what if I’d said no?’

‘Then I would have tied you to the bedposts. Wine? Whiskey? Beer?’

This man is giving me whiplash.

‘Whiskey. I have a feeling I’m going to need it.’ I ditch my handbag at the bottom of the stairs as we pass. I head for the patio as Caelon fetches the drinks.

Crickets chirp in the distance. The scent of freshly cut grass and lavender lingers in the air. I kick off my shoes and get comfortable on the L-shaped couch overlooking the pool.

Caelon appears with two tumblers of whiskey. He hands me one, then sits on the other end of the couch like he’s worried I might throw myself at him or something.

‘I don’t get you,’ I blurt. ‘You say you don’t want me, but you don’t want me to go out either.’

He taps his index finger against the side of his glass. ‘I want you, but I shouldn’t want you. In case you haven’t already gathered, I’m fifty shades of fucked up. ’

‘Really?’ I tease. ‘I hadn’t noticed.’

Caelon gazes out across the shimmering pool. ‘It took me eighteen months after Isabella died to even look at another woman. Then it took me another month on top of that to take one to bed.’ He pauses to sip his drink.

For once, I manage to keep my big mouth shut and wait for him to continue.

‘I felt guilty, you know? But then, after the first few times, I kind of let loose. I liked losing myself in someone else, for a while at least.’

‘We’re human. It’s what we were put here to do. Our purpose is to procreate.’ That’s what I tell myself on the days that I feel bad for wanting kids instead of a high-flying career, anyway.

‘I have a different purpose.’ His face darkens.

My curiosity piques. Work? His kids? Both? The revenge Dermot hinted at? The more I get to know Caelon, the less I’d put it past him. He has a dangerous edge to him. Like he’s got nothing left to lose, which isn’t true. He has his kids.

He pauses for a beat before continuing. ‘Which is why I can’t get involved with anyone. Even if their mere presence in my house is sending me demented enough to do things I’d never have dreamt of.’

I swallow. ‘Do you want me to go?’

‘Hell, no!’ His gaze snaps to mine. ‘Was it not obvious when I sent the Uber away? I want you to stay. You’re great with the kids. You’re… just great. But I need you to stop walking around my house looking like this, okay?’ He flicks a hand towards my dress. ‘You’re a distraction I don’t need right now.’

‘So, where does that leave us?’ My teeth dig into my lower lip. I can’t work him out. More like five hundred shades of fucked up.

‘Well, the second you walked in the front door, we were already more than employer/employee. I know what you taste like. Know how you shudder when you come.’ Our eyes meet with an intensity that could start a fire. ‘The chemistry between us is insane, but we can’t act on it again. But maybe we could… I don’t know, try to be friends?’

Warmth flares in my chest. ‘You know, I was only thinking earlier that I could do with some new friends.’ I reach across the couch and clink my glass against his. ‘Cheers to that.’

‘That doesn’t mean I’ll stop wanking over you, though,’ Caelon quips, and his lips stretch into an actual grin. However handsome he is when he’s brooding, he’s beautiful when he lets his guard down. The effect is devastating. ‘Thanks for the lingerie, by the way.’

I snort. ‘You know, this is the first time I’ve seen you really smile.’

‘It doesn’t happen often,’ he says, as his lips return to their usual grimace.

And just like that, it becomes my mission in life to make sure it does.

But there’s no way I’m going to stop walking around his house in tiny outfits. If I have to endure this chemistry between us, I have no intention of making it easier on him.

Quite the contrary, in fact.