Roll For Initiative

28. Cassie

T he water feels amazing on my skin. I could stay in here forever, but my stomach rumbling reminds me that I haven’t eaten a thing since Nina’s this morning. All I know is I need a margarita after that shit. Just one. A singular margarita. Not like the other night. We don’t need a repeat of that situation. Mmmm, but two guys now? Chill. The. Fuck. Out. Damn, my pussy has a mind of her own. I towel dry my hair, letting my natural curls take over. Slip on a pair of black shorts, a tank top, and some eyeliner. I had to go braless because that one was filthy from sweat and dust, and I forgot to pack another. Oh, my mother would have a fit right now if she seen me.

When I step back into the living room, Lucian is sitting on the couch, lost in his own mind. Jayme must still be in the shower. I pop down next to him and pull my legs up crisscross. The sun is starting to set in the distance. I have a perfect view of the sunrise at my place, and Lucian gets the sunset here.

“How was your shower?” He asks.

“Great. I’m jealous of how much hot water your place gets. Mine seems to run out after like 15 minutes.”

“Good, yeah, it does last a long time. There was something I wanted to talk to you about.” He angles his body on the couch to face me more. Fuck here it is he is telling me he is going to leave. He takes my hand, staring down and toying with the friendship bracelet I made us when I was 14. It is the only piece of jewelry I own. My prized possession. He has the matching one that he keeps on his keychain, always with him. Yep, this is definitely about California. “So, Jayme and I were talking...” He trails off, and my stomach is in my throat.

“About what?” I can’t keep the hurt out of my voice; I have to pretend I know nothing. I know I said I wouldn’t stop him, but can I really do that? When he locks eyes with me, something changes. It’s like his mood shifts in a split second.

“Um, Jayme and I were talking. How do you feel about Romero’s for dinner.” Whoosh. The air is pushed out of my lungs. I didn’t realize I had been holding my breath. What the hell? I thought it was about California.

“Hell yeah, that sounds amazing!” I say, trying to keep my voice level. Why isn’t he bringing up California?

“What’s amazing?” Jayme walks back into the front room barefoot and shirtless, looking like a delicious God. Good lord. His jeans hug his hips so nicely. As mad as I am at him for earlier, I can still appreciate how good he looks.

“I just told Cassie where we were going tonight. She loves the idea.” Lucian stands up and starts walking toward the hall. “I’ll be quick, then we can leave. You two play nice.” He walks away, leaving Jayme and me alone on the couch. Awkward!

“Sooooo.” Jayme starts, but I cut him off right away.

“Nope, not talking about it. You didn’t see shit, nothing happened. Drop it!” This makes him laugh.

“Sure thing, sweetheart. I totally didn’t see you pleasuring yourself in your best friend’s bathroom. Were you fantasizing about him?” My face turns red again, and I swear it will soon be my permanent color. “Ha! I thought so. You two really should talk. You are hopelessly in love with him, too, aren’t you.”

“In love? No! He is my best friend, so I love him, but I’m not ‘in love’ with him.” OK, who am I trying to convince here? Even I don’t believe that anymore.

“Mhm, go ahead and lie to yourself, just like he does. But I can see it, you two are crazy about each other, but you are both trying so damn hard to convince yourselves there isn’t something more there; why is that?” He looks at me like he is trying to get inside my brain and pick it apart.

“You don’t know what you are talking about.”

“NO? So, I didn’t hear about you almost every single day while he was in California? And he didn’t pick random things out and talk about how much you would love or hate them. He totally didn’t comment about how you would approve or disapprove of the shit we did. Shit, Cassie, I bet I know more about you than any other person in his life. The man is head over heels in love with you. And I am sure you do the same when it comes to him; you are always thinking of him.” I’m too stunned to speak. This guy, who has known Lucian for nine months, thinks that he knows our friendship better than we do. We are just insanely close. “So, tell me, Cassie. Why? Why don’t you tell him the truth? Get it out in the open.”

“Because! If it didn’t work out, I would lose him forever, OK? He means everything to me. He has always been by my side, no matter what. And if we tried dating and broke up...” I pause; my chest and stomach are hurting. “If we broke up, there would never be an US again. And I can’t, no, I won’t let that happen. I would much rather just keep him as my best friend and never fear losing him.” I bury my face in my hands. I can’t believe I just blurted all that out.

“Or, you two date, and you both get what you have always wanted. Lucian told me about all of his failed relationships. He discovered some things about himself in California. He seems to enjoy it for the most part, but he always said it felt like there was something missing... Maybe you are what he was missing all along.” He puts a hand on my back. Why is he being so nice? And how the fuck is he so aware of what I just realized a few days ago. Fuck him.

“Everything good?” Lucian comes over to me on the couch and kneels in front of me. “Cass, why do you look like you’ve been crying? Jayme, what the hell did you do now?”

“He didn’t do anything. I was just dealing with some guy issues, and he gave me some good advice. I’m OK, though. Let’s get going.” I see his jaw tense at the mention of a guy; little does he know it was about him.

*Ding* *Ding*

My phone starts going off with text messages. Geeze, I wonder who that could be. I swear to God, I’m going to lose my shit.

Theo -* Good evening, little one. I hope you are behaving. I am sending over a little something for you to wear on Saturday; it should be at your apartment tomorrow night. I think you are going to like it. *

Theo -* Have a wonderful rest of the evening, little one. And remember what I said earlier: I don't share what is mine. So, make sure your two friends keep their hands to themselves. *

Gotta love it. Just add more chaos to my plate. He is 100% either stalking me or is having someone keep tabs on me now because how else would he know there are multiple friends now, not just Lucian? I toss my phone into my bag without replying. I will deal with that later, especially since Jayme is trying to look at my screen. Fucking snoop.

“Hey, you good? Ready to go?” Lucian asks, grazing the back of my arm with his knuckles. It sends chills up my spine.

“Yep, just got to grab my keys.”

“Nope, we are taking my car, sweetheart.” Jayme really does love calling me that pet name. “So, who’s blowing up your phone? Seems to have pissed you off.” So observant.

“Just a friend. No big deal.” I glance back over at Jayme. He still has his shirt off. “Jayme put a damn shirt on. This isn’t like California; you can’t just walk around half-naked.”

“Hmm, what a shame. You should try it sometime. You might like it.” Fucker.

“Hard pass. Now let’s go.”

As we head out to the parking lot, I realize what I need to do!

“Shotgun!” I scream as I go racing across the parking lot toward Jayme’s car. I am almost to the door, just a few more feet.

“Oh, no you don’t!” I’m suddenly lifted off the ground. Strong arms wrap around my waist, and he spins me around, facing the other way. He takes me by surprise and is able to turn and grab the handle. “HAHA, I win, you lose!” Geeze, what a child.

“That’s such crap. You cheated!”

“You are just a sore loser, Cassie. You don’t know how to use all your options to win.” He stands there gloating as Jayme approaches the car.

“Hey, sweetheart, catch.” He tosses me the keys. I can’t even speak; I am so stunned. “Just don’t crash us, okay? I borrowed it from a friend while I was here. She needs to be returned without a scratch.”

“Oh, Fuck yes!” I look at Lucian and stick my tongue out at him. He looks like you drop-kicked his puppy.

The feeling I am going to get from driving this baby is going to be pure ecstasy. Zero to 60 in 4 seconds, hell fucking yes.