Ruin’s Embattlement (Tenillo Guardians AIMC #19)

Desi Chapter 2

Yesterday, I procrastinated as long as possible before joining everyone at the clubhouse to welcome Tanner home. I used the excuse of needing to finish up some work. Mom and Dad knew I was lying, but they didn’t call me on it. All they said was to hurry up and that I had to make an appearance. Even if I was an adult, I knew they were laying down the law, and I’d better obey.

The thing was, they didn’t need to say it. I might push our meeting off, but I would never totally diss him. I was happy he was home and safe. No matter how badly our friendship had tanked, I still cared about Tanner. However, it would have been much easier on my heart and mind if I didn’t.

Being close to him and making small talk was torture. Thank goodness his friend helped run interference, even if he didn’t know he was. From what I saw, Konrad was a nice guy. He might have what it took to be an Infidel. He’d told me about his interest in possibly prospecting. I wished him luck and told him they were a great bunch.

I was as amazed as those who hadn’t known it was coming when Sin and Saint gave that speech about Tanner and presented him with his cut. Ruin… I wondered where that name came from. He seemed pleased with it. I stayed long enough to see him accept it. Then I had to leave. I couldn’t stand it anymore. Although, I was curious to know what they were referring to when they mentioned things he’d done in the Marines.

I spent a restless night tossing and turning due to my thoughts about Tanner. He hadn’t been back a day, and I was more mixed up and on edge. This told me that staying here was out of the question. I needed to move up my timeline to get a place. I had enough money for deposits and such. I’d just wanted a bigger money cushion.

With this in mind, I texted Isaiah first thing this morning. I asked him if he was available to go apartment hunting with me. Being the amazing friend that he was, he said yes. We’d become super close, and even though we were no longer in college, we remained friends. I didn’t know what I would’ve done these past few years without him. He couldn’t replace Tanner, but he held his own special place.

Recalling Tanner’s criticism of me as a mother, I decided to take Shane with us. Besides, he should have some say in where we lived, to a point. I’d tried subtly to talk to him about how fun it would be to live elsewhere. I wasn’t sure he was buying it, but I was his mother. In the end, he’d live where I told him. I knew it would be hard for him to leave the compound. He’d known nothing else his entire life. But he was now in school and making friends away from the compound. He’d be alright. It wasn’t as if I would prevent him from seeing everyone. Play dates and such could be arranged.

Shane was excited when I told him we were going out with Isaiah. Not only had I become close to Isaiah, but so had my son. They had fun together. I didn’t trust anyone with my son except those in the club and Isaiah. More than a few times, he’d taken Shane, and they went to do things without me.

Isaiah had been to the compound enough that the club knew him and trusted him, so when he came to visit or pick me up, the prospects knew to let him in, regardless of who they were, no questions asked. I was checking again to be sure I had everything when there was a knock at the door, and then it opened. It was Isaiah. That was another thing he’d learned. He was free to walk into the house like everyone else on the compound. At first, he’d been wary of doing it, but Mom and Dad had assured him they were okay with it.

He smiled and greeted me by opening his arms and saying, “Good morning, sunshine. Come give me a hug.”

I laughed as I walked to him and let him hug me. I needed it. I raised on my tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. “Good morning. You’re sure in a good mood.”

“Of course I am. I get to spend the day with you and Shane. Where is he?”

“Right here,” my son yelled before he ran in and tackled Isaiah’s lower legs. I barely got out of the way. As Shane tried to wrestle him to the floor, Isaiah pretended to be fighting not to go down. They wrestled for a good minute before Shane admitted defeat. He grinned up at my friend.

“I’ll get you one day. I’m getting stronger, Is,” he said, flexing his tiny arms to show his muscles.

“You sure are. Okay, are we ready to go? Oh hey, morning, Omen. We didn’t disturb you, did we?”

Despite knowing my parents well, Isaiah admitted that Omen always made him feel a bit wary. He said it was the way he could look into your soul. I didn’t tell him that he wasn’t far off the mark. Omen’s abilities, or Cajun mojo, as the club called it, worked. No one knew why, but it had grown stronger over the last several years.

“No, you’re fine, Isaiah. Where are you off to? Going somewhere fun?” Omen asked as he went to the kitchen, which was off the living room. I knew he was probably after coffee.

“Not sure where we’ll end up, but it’s always fun when I’m with these two. I promise to keep them safe and return them without a scratch.”

He’d started telling Omen this right after they met, and he realized how protective my dad was. Omen came out of the kitchen with a cup of coffee. He smiled and raised it to Isaiah. “I know you will. You always do. Hey, are you doing anything tonight?”

“No, why?”

“Why don’t you come over for dinner? Hang out. It’s been a while since we’ve had a chance to chat,” Omen said. It wasn’t unusual for Isaiah to spend time with my family, but I wondered why tonight.

“Sure, I’d love it. What time do I need to be here? Depending on these two, we may all return at that time.”

“Be here by six, dinner at seven. Jackie will want time to chat, and I know you. You’ll want to be in the kitchen with her.”

Isaiah grinned and nodded. “Yes, sir, we’ll be here, and I love my lessons. We’ll see you later. Tell Jackie and Tyson I said hello, and I’ll see them later.”

“I will. Have a good time and be safe,” Omen said before he walked over, kissed my cheek, and then bent down to kiss Shane’s.

“I’ll be back soon, PawPaw. Don’t worry,” Shane assured him.

“I’ll be waiting for you,” Omen told him. Shane knew Omen only as his grandpa, PawPaw. He adored his PawPaw.

“See you later, Dad,” I told him.

It had taken me a while to be comfortable calling him that and Jackie, Mom. They had offered soon after I came, but I worried it was offered out of a sense of duty on their part. When I realized they meant it, I was able to do it. Occasionally, I would still call them by their names, but only sometimes.

We waved as we went out the door. Isaiah opened the car door for me, then the back one for Shane. He had my son in his car enough that he had a booster seat in the backseat. Is, as Shane called him and I did too, at times, insisted it was stupid to take my booster in and out of my car every time we went somewhere.

God, he was so sweet. I wished he’d find someone who deserved his sweetness and returned it tenfold. He’d make someone a great husband. It was sad that he was still hiding his sexuality out of fear of what his family would do if they knew. He had one more sibling who was still under eighteen. He was biding his time for her to become an adult, then he planned to tell them and let the chips fall where they may.

After securing Shane, he got into the driver’s seat, and off we went. At the gate, as we waited for it to open far enough to get out, I saw Niam watching us. I didn’t know what it was, but something about him set my nerves on edge. He’d never said or done anything to make me distrust him, but the feeling remained. When he saw I was looking at him, he raised his hand and returned to work on whatever he was doing near the watch house. It appeared he was working on it.

Just as we started to go through the gate, something made me look to the right. It was this sensation pulling at me. When I did, I saw Tanner standing there. He was staring at us with a frown on his face. I quickly turned away and thrust thoughts of him out of my head. I had a mission today, and thinking about him would only derail it. Other than knowing it was due to him that this was so important, I refused to think about him. I was praying I’d quickly find a place.

Isaiah distracted me by handing me a printout. Glancing at it, I saw a list of addresses and names.

“What’s this?” I asked.

“I took the liberty of compiling places appropriate for you two to live at.”

“How? I called you three hours ago. How would you know if they’re appropriate?”

“Desi, you’ve been telling me for months, ever since you found out you-know-who was coming back, that you’d have to move. I wanted to be prepared, so I researched, asked around, and compiled this. All I had to do this morning was go online to see if they still had availability. A couple didn’t, so I removed them. I have another one if this list doesn’t get you what you want. The other one is of houses for rent, but I know you said an apartment would be better and cheaper, so we’ll start with those.”

I was astonished, but I shouldn’t have been. This was Isaiah to the T. I reached over and squeezed his upper arm. “Thank you. Have I told you that I love you lately?”

He flashed me a grin. “Not today, so get on with it. Oh, and you’re welcome. No way do I want you and Shane living somewhere less than safe. The compound is my first preference, but I understand why you have to leave. Was it as bad as you thought it would be last night?”

Isaiah knew of my feelings for Tanner and almost every secret I had. I sighed. I had to be careful what I said in front of Shane. He was very observant. “It was worse in some ways, but we’ll talk later. Right now, I want to concentrate on this. I need to find a place soon, Is.”

This time, he reached over and squeezed my hand. “We will. If all else fails, you know you can move in with me.”

He’d offered that before. He had ended up with a three-bedroom house a great-aunt had left him. He had the room, but I didn’t want to cramp his life. “We’ll see,” was all I said.

???

Hours later, I was ready to admit defeat and cry. We’d gone to so many places I lost count. While on the surface, most appeared to be decent places to live, there was something about each one that made it a no. It wasn’t just me being too picky. In several cases, Isaiah was the one to point out an issue and deem the place inappropriate.

In Shane’s case, he’d been bewildered as to why we would ever want to leave the compound. I tried to couch it as I was just looking in case it ever came about, but he wasn’t happy. He was mostly quiet as we toured the apartments. When asked his opinion, he’d shrug. I knew he’d be a hard sell, just like the rest of the family, but I had to be strong. I knew staying would eventually destroy me. First, I had to find a place and then battle my family. They had to let me go. My hope was I might meet someone one day. It was almost a certainty whoever I settled down with wouldn’t be a biker, which meant not living on the compound.

By the time we drove back through the compound’s gates, all I wanted to do was go to bed and forget. My feet ached, and my head felt too full. Finding a place might not be as easy as I thought. Isaiah parked in our driveway. Shane gave a whoop and then was out of the car, running inside.

“Don’t give up. Today was a bust, but I have more places for us to see,” Isaiah said.

“I know, but if they end up like the ones today, I’ll never find a place. Maybe I need to revise my list and not be so critical.”

“The things we balked on were legit. You guys leaving here and ending up in a terrible home or somewhere dangerous isn’t happening. I won’t let my friends do that. And I was serious. You can live with me. Hell, I’ll charge you rent and everything if you want. It’s too much for one person.”

“Isaiah, I appreciate the offer, but you’re not thinking. What happens when you want to bring someone home, or if I do? Having us around all the time could get on your nerves. You won’t be able to escape to your house for peace and quiet.”

“If I need the latter, I’ll go to my room. As for bringing people home, I wouldn’t. As for you doing it, I don’t see that. If we end up in serious relationships, then we’ll talk and figure it out. Come on. Say you’ll truly consider it.”

“Okay, I’ll think about it. Now, we’d better get inside before someone comes looking for us. You have cooking to do.”

A huge grin appeared on his face. He practically jumped out of the car, ran to open my door, and then hurried me inside. The man loved to eat and cook, and Jackie enjoyed teaching him. Every time he was around, and it was mealtime, he would be in the kitchen with her. They had a blast cooking and talking.

Walking into the house, I lost Isaiah as he took off for the kitchen. I smiled as I heard him greet Jackie. I waved at Omen in the living room, talking to Shane. I went to my room to put my purse away and to change into something more comfortable. After doing that and tidying myself up, I returned to join the others.

When I got there, I saw that Tyson had joined us. I was glad to see him. He’d been so busy lately we hadn’t seen much of him. He was working double-time to finish his degree in computers. We were all waiting to see what he’d do with it. Many thought he’d work with Phantom or the club in some way. I wasn’t so sure. Whatever he did, I knew he’d do a great job. The angry kid from several years ago was gone, and in his place was a wonderful young man.

“Hey, I didn’t know you’d be home. It’s good to see you. I thought you ran away,” I teased Tyson as I went over to him. He opened his arms and I stepped up to receive his hug. He squeezed me tightly and gently shook me.

“You can’t get rid of me that easily, Des. I heard Isaiah in the kitchen with Mom. I think he only comes around to hang with her. Better keep an eye on him.” He directed the last remark to Omen.

“Don’t you worry. I won’t let anyone steal her. Although now that you mention it, I may have to warn him. I thought he was all about our Desi, but maybe not.”

I rolled my eyes. “Come on, Dad, you can’t be afraid of Isaiah stealing any of us.”

“But he does. I’m tempted to kidnap Jackie, but I know he’d for sure murder me, so I’ll stick to snatching you and Shane,” Isaiah said as he walked out of the kitchen. Mom was with him. He said it around a mouthful of something.

“That’s not fair! He gets to eat, and we don’t?” Tyson protested.

“If you cook, you get to taste. It’s the rules,” Mom said.

We were playfully bickering as a group. We were so into it that I didn’t notice anyone had joined us until the voice I both dreaded and loved interrupted us.

“You started the fun without us? That doesn’t seem fair,” Tanner’s voice boomed.

Of course, that got Mom and Tyson’s attention. They hurried over to greet him. I saw Konrad was with him. Shit! Why hadn’t I thought this out? It was a no-brainer that Tanner would be here if we were having a family dinner. I’d gotten so used to him not being around that I zoned it out. I looked over at Isaiah. He was checking out the two additions. When he glanced at me, he mouthed Wow . He’d never seen Tanner in person, only in pictures. I made sure not to let them meet. I hadn’t wanted to hear Tanner’s criticism of him, which he would have given. Isaiah must’ve sensed I was about to run because he came over to me, wrapped his arm around me, and whispered in my ear.

“Desi, breathe. You can do this. We’ll talk later if you need to. I’ll get you out of here if it becomes too much. Just wink, and I’ll think of an excuse. I’ve got your back.”

Tears smarted my eyes. I turned to face him and wrapped my arms around his neck. I held his head down so I could whisper back in his ear, “You are the best. I love you.”

He grinned as he raised his head. Loud enough for others in the room to hear, he said, “I love you, too, sunshine. Who’s going to introduce me to the additions? I haven’t had the pleasure.”

He dropped a kiss on my cheek as he let go and moved closer to Tanner and Konrad. Konrad was giving us a speculative look. Tanner was glaring at us. Screw him. It was Omen who came to the rescue. I was glad I wasn’t left to do the introductions. I wasn’t sure my voice would work.

“I will. Isaiah, you haven’t met our son, Tanner. Wait, belay that. He’s Ruin now. He was patched in last night at his homecoming party. And this is his friend, Konrad, who just got out of the Marines with him. This young guy is deciding whether he’d like to try and become an Infidel. If so, he’ll be relegated to prospect duties. Guys, this is Isaiah. He’s a welcome addition to the family. He and Desi went to college together and have been inseparable since. If it tells you anything, I trust him with her and Shane, and Jackie does too. Plus, he’s your mom’s cooking partner when he’s here,” he told Tanner with a chuckle.

There was the slightest pause before Tanner came forward and held out his hand to Isaiah. Konrad was right behind him. Tanner, or Ruin, as I needed to remember to think and call him, wasn’t smiling, but he did give my friend a chin lift and shook his hand.

“It’s good to meet a friend of Desi’s.”

“Oh, Desi and I are more than friends, but thank you. I’ve heard a lot about you from your family. They’re very proud of you.”

Ruin scowled, then let go of his hand. Isaiah presented it to Konrad, who willingly took it and smiled as he shook it. “Hey, it’s great to meet you. You’ll have to tell me the secret to winning this club and family over.”

“Well, it starts by being honest and protective. Believe me, when I first came around, Omen almost made me piss myself, and I’m man enough to admit it. Still, to this day, I know if I don’t protect Desi and Shane, he’ll make me regret it. However, I’d do anything to keep them safe, so no worries. That’s a good place to start.” I was a little amazed at how Isaiah was talking. He was always friendly but more on the quiet side with those he didn’t know well.

Omen clapped Isaiah on the shoulder. “I have no worries about their safety when they’re with you, but you’re right. I was impressed as hell when I didn’t scare him off. Alright, now that we all know each other, let’s relax. Mon Bijou , my jewel, do you need my help with anything in the kitchen?”

“No, honey. I think Isaiah and I have it under control. We’ll pop back in and finish one thing, and then we’ll join you. All that’s really left is to let it cook, and then we can eat. Does anyone need something to drink?”

“Mom, we’ll wait on ourselves. You do what you must, then relax,” Ruin told her.

I was too upset to drink, so I sat on the couch. Isaiah went to the kitchen with Mom. Dad was in his favorite chair. Tyson had taken a seat on the loveseat. Since this was a common place to gather, we had a lot of places to sit. There was the extra-long couch, a loveseat, and two oversized chairs. If needed, we brought chairs in from the kitchen or threw oversized pillows on the floor and sat on those.

Shane was content to play with some of his toys. We kept a box of them in the living room for him and the other grandkids. At the moment, he was playing with one of his toy motorcycles, racing it all over the floor and making bike sounds. Lord, help me when he is old enough to drive. If he rode the way he played, I’d never survive, and neither would he.

When Ruin and Konrad came back, they had extra drinks. Omen already had one, so Tyson was handed one. I was startled when Konrad sat next to me and gave me my favorite coke. “Oh, thank you, but you didn’t need to.”

“You can’t be the only one who doesn’t have something. I asked Ruin, and he said this would be what you wanted. Is it alright?”

“It is. Again, thank you. So, tell me, what do you think of Texas and the compound so far? Or is it too early to ask?”

Last night, I discovered he was from Arkansas. We didn’t get into why he chose to come here rather than go back home. I wondered but thought it might be too personal to ask.

“I’m enjoying it so far. We mostly hung out here, and Ruin took me around to see most of the compound. I gotta say, this place is fantastic. The pool and barbeque areas are awesome, and so is the kids’ play area. If I had that growing up, I would’ve lost my mind. It’s better than any playground I’ve ever seen.”

“True. The club went crazy when they built it, and they kept adding to it as time went by. Shane’s school playground doesn’t even come close to this one. He often laments it.”

“What grade is he in?”

“Kindergarten.”

“Kindergarten? I thought he was older. He’s a tall kid.” He was right. Shane was taller than all the others in his class.

“He’ll be six in three months, and yes, he is tall. He towers over the other kids, even those in first grade.”

He was about to say something else, but we were interrupted by Tanner, I mean Ruin, coming over. He stood in front of the couch, staring at me. I had no idea why. “Yes, can I help you?” I asked.

“Yeah, make room. Why don’t you scoot down, Desi?”

If I did, it would put me between him and Konrad. I wasn’t sure I could take it. I was about to stand, offer him my spot, and make an excuse when Isaiah walked in and came to my rescue.

“Hey, Desi, while dinner is cooking, I thought you could show me the issue you were having with your spreadsheet. I bet I can figure it out.”

“What problem? I can help if you need,” Tyson immediately offered. I wanted to strangle Isaiah for making up a lie that would capture everyone’s interest.

“Nah, it’s not with the program. It’s about figuring out where the money is coming from. If you’ll excuse us, we won’t be long. I don’t want to forget it,” Isaiah said, directing it mainly at Omen. As Omen nodded, I couldn’t figure out why my dad had a tiny smile on his face. It was like he knew something the rest of us didn’t. Weird. I popped to my feet, eager to get away.

“Where do you need to go to work on it?” Ruin asked.

“Her room. That’s where her laptop is, isn’t it, sunshine?” Isaiah asked. I swear the way he said it sounded suggestive. The way he was smiling at me was the same. I needed to leave the room ASAP, so I went with it.

“It is. Thanks for reminding me. You know how things like this bug me. Let’s go. Dad, we’ll be back shortly.”

Omen nodded. As we walked out of the room, I swear I could feel Ruin’s eyes boring into my back. Waves of disapproval were coming off him. I knew what he was thinking. He thought Isaiah and I were going to my room to fool around. If he only knew. As soon as we were in my bedroom and the door was shut, I rounded on my friend.

“What the hell are you up to? What’s up with the tone and the looks? You’ve never acted this way before. If you keep it up, everyone will think you and I are more than friends.”

“So what if they do? It’ll do them good to think of you being involved with someone, and it might just help you get them to accept your move. It’s all I want. Can I tell you something, and you won’t kill me?”

“Sure, go for it.”

“Oh my God, Tanner’s pictures don’t do the guy justice. I mean, I always thought he was hot, but he’s twice as hot in person. And his friend, Konrad, ain’t anything to sneeze at. When I’m here, I’ve always felt like I’ve landed in a gay man’s heaven with all the yummy men, but it’s gone through the roof with those two here. Is there any chance Tanner plays for my side? Or his buddy? Please, let it be so.”

The eager look on his face made me lose it. I laughed until I was in tears. When I calmed down, he stood there glaring at me.

“Exactly what’s so damn funny? I’ll have you know, if they are on my team, I’m a damn fine catch.”

“I know you are. I have no clue about Konrad, but as far as Tan—Ruin goes—all I’ve ever heard is he’s all about the ladies.” As I said it, my remembered pain filled me. Instantly, Isaiah sobered and came to hold me. He rocked us from side to side.

“I’m sorry, hon. Forgive me. I can see that thought hurts. Desi, I know that you’ve been in love with him for years, and your friendship was all but destroyed, but the guy out there isn’t happy to have me or Konrad talking to you. Are you sure there are no feelings there?”

“Isaiah, no, there isn’t. Ruin doesn’t even like me anymore. He sure as hell doesn’t have feelings like mine. God, why can’t I just forget him and move on? I’ll be twenty-two this year. I’m ready to have someone in my life. I’m hoping whoever it is, he might be the one, but if not, then at least I’ll be living and growing. I’ve come so far these past six years. This is the last hurdle I have to conquer.”

“Can I make a suggestion, and you seriously consider it?”

“Yes, you know you can.”

“From what you told me last night and the tiny bit I saw out there, Konrad is interested in you. There’s no mistaking the vibe, even if it does crush my dreams.” He pouted out his bottom lip. I giggled, and then he kept going.

“I think you should see if Konrad might be that guy. You find him attractive, don’t you?”

“Well, umm, yeah, he’s handsome.”

“And he’s interesting to talk to. From what I saw, you’re not jittery if he’s close to you.”

“True.”

“Then I say, give it a week, and he’ll be asking you out. When he does, I want you to say yes. If he wants more than one date, and he will, you should go. Give him a chance. Forget he’s Ruin’s friend. You’ve got to try. Why not with him?”

I stood there thinking over what he said for a couple of minutes. In the end, I had to admit he was right. Konrad was handsome, articulate, interesting, and funny. I’d be stupid to say no if he asked.

“You’re right. I need to say yes if he asks. Although, if he’s Tanner’s, shit, Ruin’s friend, he’s probably badmouthed me to him.”

“It won’t matter. Trust me.” He winked.

Inhaling, I made the promise. “I will. Pinkie promises.”

He chuckled as we hooked our pinkie fingers together and shook. It was our sacred oath. I was now committed no matter what to doing it. All I had to do was suck up my courage and go back out there and survive. It wouldn’t be easy, but I could do it with Isaiah at my side.

“If you can scope out when you go on that date if either one swings my way or both ways, put in a good word for me, please,” he slipped in.

I choked on my laughter. Isaiah’s humor never got old. I couldn’t even get mad at him for lusting after Ruin.