Runaway Bride’s Guide to Love (Guide to Love #1)

25. Emmett

25

emmett

“Uncle Met!”

I kneel down as my nephew comes running into my arms. “Hey, buddy.”

Jack plows into my body and wraps his tiny three-year-old arms around my neck, squeezing me as hard as he can. Winnie starts jumping next to me, clearly wanting in on the moment. And I hug him back. I squeeze his little body, and for the first time in what feels like forever, I relax.

This is exactly what I needed. I’ve been in a funk ever since Stella came to my house last week. I ended up texting Maddie and canceling our plans. Hell, I’ve barely left my house except for absolutely necessary site visits. I made a horrible excuse to get out of going to Rolling Hills this week. I thought a few days away would make me feel better, but it hasn’t. Now I’m behind at work, and I feel like a fucking schmuck.

I need to suck it up. I need to get over these feelings and get back to normal. That’s what I’ve been telling myself for days now. That I’m a grown man and I should be able to turn the switch off. Or at least, stick to a strategy.

Desensitizing is going to take forever to work, if it even does. Being a dick just made me feel like, well, a dick. Avoidance has been my strategy recently, but that’s failing on multiple levels. Plus, she doesn’t deserve my cold shoulder. I’m the one in the wrong. I got too close when I had no business doing so. And I’m taking it out on her. I don’t want to quit my job, but that might be safer for my sanity than seeing her every day.

Because if I see her every day it might drive me mad. I’m starting to think there’s no getting over Stella Banks.

“How’s my favorite kiddo?” I ask Jack as Winnie continues to run around us.

“Good,” he says. “I brought a ball!”

“That’s fun,” I say as he shows me the foam football he’s holding. “Where did you get that?”

“Brock,” he says, like I’m supposed to know. Before I can ask any more questions, Jack throws the football, well, as far as he can, and Winnie promptly goes to chase it. The two start playing as Maddie walks up, taking a seat with me on the bench at the dog park.

“Who’s Brock?” I ask.

“My neighbor,” she says. “Or as Jack likes to say, his new best friend.”

“Does this new best friend have a last name?” I ask. Because if there’s a man living next to my sister, who is giving my nephew toys, I need to check this guy out.

She lets out a sigh before answering. “Napier.”

Did she just say…”Brock Napier? As in pro football player for the Nashville Fury Brock Napier?”

“The one and only,” she says. “But before you go all big brother on me, we’re just friends. Jack thinks he’s cool and likes his cats. That’s it.”

“That’s it?”

“Cross my heart,” she says, making the same motion. “Believe me, I doubt a pro football player is just jonesing to get with the single mom next door.”

“Why not?” I ask. “He’d be fucking lucky.”

Now it’s her turn to give me the raised eyebrow look .

“What?”

“It’s just funny.”

“What’s funny?”

“That just the mention of a guy on my radar—who’s not even on my radar—and you quickly say how lucky he’d be to have me. Yet, when I say the same thing but about you, that any woman would be lucky to call you theirs, I’m met with a look meant to terrify. Oh! Like that one! That look right there..”

I don’t know at what age I stopped being able to rattle Maddie. I think it was when she was two.

“And! Since we’re on the subject,” she continues. “Do you want to tell me why you canceled on our park date last week?”

“No reason,” I say, making sure not to make eye contact with her, instead focusing on Jack and Winnie playing in front of us.

“Interesting. You know. You’ve been a little weird since you got back from your vacation. You know, the vacation where you had a date that I’ve still not heard about.”

I groan, but that’s the only follow up I make to her statements. I know she’s going to keep going, and I’m going to let her. But I’m not going to add fuel to her fire.

“You might ask, ‘how have I acted weird?’ Great question, I’d love to tell you! For starters, your already short and sweet text messages are even shorter than normal. When Jack FaceTimed you the other night, you looked stressed. And, the biggest signal of them all, I heard you agreed to go to dinner with Mom and Gary. You never do that without two weeks of a fight.”

“His name’s Larry,” I correct.

“And you know his name! You’re not calling him by a nickname. Something is definitely up.”

I hate that she knows all of this. Sure my texts have been short. I felt myself being cold to Jack the other night. As for Mom? That one was just because I’m too tired to fight.

Before she can add on to my list of offenses, I’m saved by my nephew, who comes running over to me and jumps on my lap.

“What’s up, buddy? ”

“Water please,” he says, reaching over to Maddie for his water bottle.

I take Jack’s distraction and let myself cuddle him for a second. He still asks to sit on my lap, which I know won’t last for too much longer, so I take it in when I can.

I remember when Maddie told me she was pregnant. She was young, scared, and alone after the sperm donor took off after she told him. From that moment, I knew what I needed to do. Step up. Be who she needed me to be. Do whatever I could for her and Jack. Whether that’s a babysitter, someone to teach him to eventually throw a baseball, or just to show him what a man should be, I was ready. Being Uncle Met has been the best thing that’s happened to me.

“I know you’re going to yell at me, but I’m okay with it; you know you’d be a great father.”

I huff out a laugh as Jack climbs off me and heads back to playing with Winnie. “Sure. Because I know so much about being a father.”

Maddie turns toward me on the bench. “Do you think any of us know what it’s like to be parents before we have a kid? Newsflash: No other parents, books, or Mom hack videos can prepare you for having a child. Do you think I knew what the fuck I was doing when I found out I was pregnant, just because I technically had a mother growing up? I didn’t. If I were to write an autobiography of my parenting, it would be called ‘You Grew Up with Rhonda: Here’s How You Do the Opposite.’”

I laugh, because she’s right. Don’t get me wrong, we never went without a roof over our heads or food on the table. But how did those things get paid for? That we still don’t know, and frankly, I don’t ever want to know.

“That’s fair,” I say. Normally, I’d end this conversation with silence. And I don’t know why I don’t, but yet again my actions are going rogue from my rational brain. “Do you think I’m like them?”

This catches her off guard. “Like who? ”

“Mom. My dad. Am I like them?”

Maddie doesn’t answer right away. Which I appreciate. Because she could easily just say “of course not!” and move on.

“I can’t speak for your dad, because I never met him,” she says. “As for Mom? A little. But in a good way.”

That takes me aback. “How’s that?”

“You do what needs to be done for the people you love. Mom might not have had the most conventional way of parenting, but she made sure we never wanted for anything. You do that with me. No matter what it takes, or what you have to sacrifice, you make sure Jack and I don’t want.”

I never thought of it like that. “Thanks, but that’s not what I meant.”

“Oh. What did you mean then?”

Shit. I’ve said too much. “Never mind.”

“No. Hold up,” Maddie says, grabbing my face and turning it toward her. “What were you going to say?”

“Nothing.”

“Bullshit,” she says firmly. “How about instead of you talking, you listen, and I tell you what I think you’ve been wanting to say and that I’ve been thinking for years now.”

This ought to be good.

“I think the real reason you’ve never dated seriously, or considered being a father, is because you’re scared you’re like them. You’re scared that you are either a flake like Mom, who will come and go and never settle down, or that you’re like your dad, and that you don’t have it in you to be in a committed relationship or take on the responsibilities of a father. So, because you don’t like to take risks and would rather have the mundane because it’s safe, you’ve never allowed yourself to try.”

Do I tell her that she’s spot on? Judging by the smug look on her face, she knows she is.

“I don’t want anyone to get hurt,” I say in defense of her accurate description. “Why would I hurt someone if I don’t have to? Myself included. ”

Maddie takes a second and looks over to Jack. “When his dad told me he was out, I was hurt. Devastated. But I’d take that pain in triple if that meant I’d still get Jack out of the deal.”

I never thought of it like that.

“I think it’s too late,” I admit. “Can I just turn a switch with someone? For years I’ve been the anti-relationship guy. And what? Now all of a sudden after one day in the park and lightbulb moment I’m going to be asking her to marry me?”

This gets Maddie’s attention as she whips her head back my way. “Emmett Michael Collins, is there someone you want to marry? I was just hoping you thought a girl was pretty!”

I really need to get out of this funk because I have zero control over my reactions or words anymore. “No. Maybe. Fuck…I don’t know.”

“Is this Florida girl? Please tell me this is Florida girl! I’m not going to stop asking until you tell me so just tell me pleeeeease.”

Sometimes Maddie is wise beyond her years. And then at times she’s my annoying little sister. “Yes. It’s Florida girl.”

“Squeeeeeeeeee.” I don’t know the sound that just came out of Maddie’s mouth, but she’s also kicking her feet rapidly.

“You good?”

She lets out one more loud noise before composing herself. “Yes. I’m good. Now where were we?”

“I’m hoping I’m not like my parents because I’m pretty sure the feelings I’ve thought for weeks were just lust and attraction are something else.”

“Oh! Yes. You’re in love. Got it,” Maddie says. “Just go talk to her. Tell her all this.”

“Pass. Second option please.”

Love her? I love her? I don’t love her.

Why am I even trying to lie to myself anymore? I do. I love her like crazy. I love her smile. I love how she always wants to do a good job with everything she does and puts her whole self into it. I love how she snuggles next to me like she was meant to fit into my side. I love how she feels in my arms. I love how she makes me do things I never thought I’d do, like go to the fucking beach. I love how she’s inquisitive and always wants to learn.

Holy fuck, I love her…

Maddie lets out a groan, but doesn’t continue because the sound of my cell phone ringing interrupts us. It’s Simon—probably calling me to ask when he’s going to see my face again.

“Hey man. What’s up?”

“What are you doing right now?”

The urgency in his voice takes me aback. “I’m at the park with Maddie and Jack. Why? What’s up?”

“I hate to ask you to do this, but I’m in a bind.”

“Ask me what? Just tell me and I can help.”

“Stella’s going to Duncan’s right now to pack her things. She’s been adamant that she doesn’t want anyone’s help and she’ll be fine but…”

“No. She shouldn’t be alone with that asshole.”

“Exactly. The problem is, Charlie has to work at the restaurant tonight and Lainey is throwing up everywhere. I was going to just show up so she couldn’t protest…”

“I’ll go,” I say before he can say anymore. “Text me the address.”

“Thanks, man. I owe you one.”

We hang up the phone and I quickly stand up from the bench. “Can you take Winnie for the night? I need to go to Stella.”

Maddie studies me for a second. “Sure. Is everything okay? And who’s Stella?”

“It will be.”

I don’t answer the second question as I start jogging to my truck, but not before I hear Maddie call out to me.

“Emmett!”

“Yeah?”

“It’s her, isn’t it?”

I nod, not even caring about hiding it anymore. “Yeah. It’s her. ”

“Perfect. Then go get your girl.”

My girl.

Mine.

Stella’s mine.

Actually, change that. I’m hers. She’s had me from the first day we met. She had me the second I saw her in that wedding dress. She’s had me from the jump.

Now I just hope I’m not too late.