Runaway Hearts: Seduced by Danger

29. Letter To My Little Dreamer

Chapter 29

Letter To My Little Dreamer

I slump onto the bed, my body weary and mind overwhelmed after an hour of sifting through cryptic documents.

“Ah… Bonsa?.” I let out a heavy sigh and squeezed the teddy bear.

My gaze wanders up to the ceiling, seeking respite from the endless stream of information that holds no clue. Suddenly, a sharp voice shatters my thoughts.

My gaze wanders up to the cracked ceiling, searching for a moment of peace among the chaos. But Kai’s sharp voice jolts me back to reality before I can collect my thoughts. “Marianne,” he calls from the sofa. “Look at this.” He thrusts a crumpled envelope toward me, the stamp of British Columbia’s postal office peeking out from the corner. “It’s anonymous,” he continues, excitement lacing his words. “There’s a letter inside.”

My eyes lock onto the envelope, my heart thudding in sync with the rain’s rhythm outside. Kai carefully unfolds the fragile paper, his fingers trembling.

“Here,” he says, moving to hand it to me but then stopping himself. He reads it aloud instead, his voice filled with dread and curiosity. “‘To whom it may concern: If you are reading this, then you are likely caught in the tangled web I left behind.’”

Rain pelts against the window, creating a soothing rhythm that defies the tension in the room. I wrap the blanket tighter around myself.

It’s story time.

Kai’s voice continues, unwavering yet heavy with the weight of the message. “‘Hiro, my little dreamer… This letter is your nineteenth birthday gift.”

Hiro? A nickname for Hiroshi.

Kai’s face freezes in shock and confusion, his eyes wide as he takes in the crumpled letter. “There are things I couldn’t explain to you while I was alive. Secrets too dangerous to speak aloud.” The pitter-patter of rain intensifies outside, almost drowning out Kai’s voice as he reads the mysterious letter aloud. “But know this: everything I did was to protect you. The people I dealt with and the risks I took were all for your safety.’” Kai’s breath catches, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he sits on the bed.

And then, plot threads start to connect in my head. The death of his mother, his quest for answers, and then, the B & E into Vancouver’s safe house and the pile of documents scattered around.

That letter is from his mother.

Kai pauses, his watery eyes meeting mine across the bed, and I don’t have the strength to refuse his hand in mine, offering comfort and understanding in this unexpected moment.

“Do you want me to read it?” I ask.

He sniffs and nods. “Please.”

My fingers tingle with anticipation as I take the letter from Kai’s shaking hand, feeling the paper’s texture and the slight weight of the letter in my palm. I clear my throat. “‘I have done terrible things, things I’m not proud of. But there are reasons, explanations that may never justify my actions but might offer some understanding.’” A soft smile stretches my face at the careful handwriting.

Kai’s head falls into his hands.

His shoulders shake with silent sobs, the weight of his past crashing down on him. I move to sit beside him, hesitating for a moment before wrapping an arm around his shoulders.

“Keep reading,” he breathes.

My eyes start to water as memories of my mother’s absence flood my mind. This letter kills me, too. It serves as a poignant reminder of the love I never received. The words on the page seem to emanate a gentle warmth, filling me with bittersweet emotions. Compassion and a little jealousy.

I keep reading. “I never wanted this life for you. I yearned for a life where lies and deceit were nothing but fiction.” Kai becomes a wild creature, born of unexpected twists and turns, with a mane of electricity and eyes that glimmer with disbelief and wonder. “Rowan helped us devise a plan, but Six’s brutality was something I could have never imagined.” He recoils. “I told him I was in love with Christian, that you had nothing to do with it, so he would leave you alone. I’m sorry, my little dreamer.”

The weight of his mother’s words crushes him. Every syllable sends tremors through his entire frame, his chest sinking dryly, and the tension spirals out of control, only to be released in heart-wrenching cries.

It’s breaking me.

I put the letter aside and slid off the bed to breathe.

I can’t.

The man I love is being torn to shreds by tender words, and I want this to stop. But I can’t. A mother’s sacrifice is nothing short of extraordinary in his world.

Even though I want to console him, I’m pissed he lied to me.

So, I read. And soul-shattering sobs escape from his chest.

“On your nineteenth birthday, you will have access to an account I opened under my maiden name for you if you ever want something else in your life other than hurt and manipulation.”

His fists are red under the pressure of hanging to the sheets, his body swaying in a wave motion as a torrent of tears flow down his face.

I didn’t know a man could cry so hard.

“I’m going to…” Kai starts but doesn’t finish. He takes a shuddering breath.

I continue. “Rowan is the holder. He is the key to your freedom if you ever want it. You can choose another path, my little dreamer. You have the fundamental right to a better life. To the freedom I wished for us. I love you. Mom.”

The air thickens with a solemn quiet as I finish the letter.

“I’m going to die…” Kai chokes.

From heartache.

The rain outside morphs from a gentle tap to a steady downpour.

Kai’s sobs reach my ears, the echo bouncing off the walls of our tiny safehouse, but each cry drives a nail into my heart. I want to mend him, piece him together from this shattered state, but his pain is too raw.

And it hurts me, too.

Words of reassurance exit my mouth on automat, my soul yearning to soothe his. “It’s okay. I’m a nurse. I’ll bring you back to life.”

I reach for his hand again, locking our fingers with an iron grip. Kai pulls me closer, his body trembling like a leaf in a raging tempest. My lips find his forehead, pressing silent vows of comfort and love.

“All this time,” he whispers in a tremolo. “I could’ve been someone else.” His words splinter with the weight of regret. “Could’ve been free.”

His eyes, red-rimmed and shimmering, reflect unseen universes of pain, something that resonates with me. A tear rolls down my cheek unnoticed. I brush his hair back, fingers tracing the lines of his face.

“You deserve…” But a pressure crushes my chest and steals my breath away. “Every.” I can’t breathe. “Word.” I gasp, vision blurring as my fingers shake.

“She wanted so much for me,” he says, and I break.

A sledgehammer of emotions shatters the walls of my soul, and a flood of feelings rushes through my body with such intensity that it shakes me to my foundation.

I gasp.

Opening my mouth wider, but it feels as if someone is sitting on my chest, pushing the air out instead of in.

Shit, I might faint from empathy.

Luminous points dance before my eyes.

That’s not empathy.

“Too tight...” I manage to grunt under the weight of Kai’s embrace.

He loosens his hold a little, and I gasp again, my head spinning from the onslaught of feelings.

The weight of his emotions presses on the small canoe of my mental stability, threatening to capsize us.

I gently disentangle myself from Kai’s embrace, guiding him to sit up straight while keeping a supportive hand on his shoulder.

“Ice cream?” The thought pops into my mind to distract us from our emotions. “I want ice cream,” I say without thinking.

Kai gives me a deadpan look but shakes his head.

I need ice cream more than anything else in the world right now.

Even more than coffee.