Sacrifice

Chapter Eleven

I 'm being cruel. Her resistance drives my anger to the point where I don't know how to control myself. Watching her shrink into herself kills me. Her fiery spirit is what calls to me, and I want more of it.

"On second thought, no. You aren't allowed to leave. I won't allow it."

Aribella is mine, damn it. If she thinks I'd let her go and not chase her down, she's sorely mistaken. Fuck, I hope she runs. The chase would be so sweet, and I'd get to show her just how much of a goddamn beast I can be. She spirals down a hole of despair and the regret eats at me.

Swallowing it down, I remind myself now isn't the time to regret anything. This woman has been mine secretly for a year and now that she's here, I'm unwilling to let her go. Aribella stands up and I make no move to bring her back to the couch.

"I..." her soft whisper is like a tidal wave of anguish hitting my body. Tears run down her face and she looks ill. Her blood pressure is probably too high.

"You need to calm down and rest, mi reina ."

"You killed him and..." She sways and I move, pulling her to me. Fuck, I shouldn't have told her. Hell, I could have made up a story about him dying on a yacht or something similarly fitting.

Sighing, I gently rub her back. "Yes, I did. It was either kill him or have the other families come looking for you. I'm the lesser of two evils."

Her feet aren't moving, but I feel her body giving out. She's trying to faint on me and it makes me worry, but I'm in this for a pound. "If you run, you'll never be safe, Aribella. You'll be hunted down."

What she doesn't know is that I'll die before I let them have her. She needs to understand—I'm doing all of this for her. Even if it is selfish and I'm resorting to blackmail. Emotional warfare is my strong suit. Then again, I'm used to dealing with the scourge of the earth, not innocent’s.

Aribella sobs into my shoulder and I'm sick to my stomach knowing I'm the cause of this.

"I'd like to be alone for a bit." She trembles as she takes a step out of my arms.

Backing away, I let her leave. My home is wired so I can see every hall and room. Sending a text to Mossimo, I huff in annoyance.

Me : Family meeting in half an hour.

I hate when the bastards call a meeting, but that's what the phone call was earlier. Now isn't the best time to leave, but when they call I must go. Fuck, they are going to complain about every little thing happening, and it's exhausting.

My phone pings, and I look at it.

Mossimo : Now?

Looking at the camera feed, I see Mossimo turn towards my office. The door to the library opens and I smile. Of course, mi reina would go there.

Me : Yes. Take the cat to the library. We leave in five.

I touch my phone as Aribella's face comes into view, and I think about how much she affects me. I'll let her have the library as a sanctuary—a refuge of sorts. For now, I won't barge in. Being with the families will be a distraction.

As Mossimo drops off Espresso, I get dressed. When he gets here, I've changed into a suit. "What?" I demand as I tie the final knot into my tie.

"You know, for a man who was so happy in the kitchen earlier, you look like someone has died."

"Fuck off." Goddamn him. He's the only person who can get away with talking to me like that.

Mossimo shakes his head and laughs as we walk out of the office. "You told her then."

As the garage door opens, I growl. 'Yes. I had to. There was no choice in the matter. The fact I fucked her before telling her was wrong."

Mossimo opens the door of the Mercedes G Class for me and I get in. A sigh leaves me as I look at him. "I'm sure she feels betrayed not only by me but by her brother as well. The bastard gave her to me like she was nothing more than money to be handed from one person to another."

He cocks an eyebrow at me. "And yet, you love her." The fucker closes the door on me so I can't refute him. He walks behind the car to get in on the driver's side.

"No, I don't." What a fucking crock of shit. I adore her and want nothing more than for her to love me as well.

"Stop bullshitting yourself. You love her." He starts the car and the garage door opens. "I saw you pull every picture, written word, and social media interaction on Carlos and Aribella. Hell, you spent hours watching her at the college campus."

He's right. To admit it would make him smug.

"You love her and made sure to set up the trap so Carlos wouldn't have a fucking way out of it. His only choice was to give you Aribella."

"I did it to save her life," I mumble as I watch the camera in the library.

Mossimo laughs but says nothing more.

"You're right." Admitting he's right is a damn bullet to my pride. But he is. I've been in love with her since last Christmas and it only gets stronger by the second.

"Of course, I am. Now stop moping and let's go see what the hell the families want so you can get back to your girl."

I look out the window, feeling like a whiny little bitch. Yeah, this isn't my style. Aribella will see reason. Or I can always make her see it. With that thought, I smooth my hands down my thighs and formulate a plan.

Mi reina is on the window seat reading a book when I enter the library hours later. I didn't get to her immediately after I arrived home. There were too many plans I needed to finish after my meeting. Besides, my damn anxiety about fighting with Aribella forced me to calm down first. Otherwise, I would have thrown her to the floor, forcing her to see things my way.

"Aribella."

She jumps, and the book falls from her hands. "Oh!"

Looking away from me, she curls into herself. A growl leaves me at how skittish she's being. The tiny devil in my ear cackles. Espresso looks at me and meows. I shake my head and pick up the book. "You should be aware of who enters your space," I reprimand her.

"I was busy reading. Seriously, you expected me to hear you?" That sassy retort makes me smile. Yeah, it looks like her spirit is back. Good.

Taking a calming breath, I hand her the book and sit down next to her. "Have you decided on whether or not you are staying here?"

I let her think she was in here to conclude her next move. In reality, I was letting her stew with the finality of her predicament. Aribella doesn't say anything and keeps her head down. Damn it. My anger at her not fighting back boils deep within me. Yet, I control it. I'm not trying to be the beast she thinks I am.

"Ah, so your silence must mean you've decided to be a good girl and stay here." Like she ever fucking had a choice. I smirk at her, but she refuses to look at me.

"Where else would I go? The farm was the only place I had." She glares at me as I slide my hand along her calf. I rather like it when she's glaring at me. Her tears and sadness make the guilt rise to the surface. If she's being sassy, bratty, and feisty, I don't feel it so much.

Now would be the most opportune time to have the finest of homes built for her, but I can't. Not until she's willingly mine. "This is true. It's been demolished." Another lie slips past my lips. What the fuck am I doing? I want her begging me. Not the other way around. Fuck that. She will beg to stay with me.

Aribella closes her eyes and turns her head away from me. I want to demand she look at me, but I don't. Instead, I grab her hair and force her to face me.

"Then I guess I have to stay. I can't be homeless and fight off the crazy cartel families."

Mi reina looks so defeated and it eats at me. "I'm sure you hate me and you have every right to do so. But know you'll be safe here." I should promise I'd rather die a thousand times over than her not be happy.

No promises leave my lips, though. "But you're here now and you're choosing to stay, so I expect you to behave."

Fuck me. It seems I can't be gentle with her, even when she needs it the most. Aribella looks at me and I squeeze her hair and move my other hand that was on her calf to her cheek. Wiping the tear away, I chastise myself. You damn idiot.

"The problem is, I don't hate you." She tries to get loose from my hold, but my hand is firm. "I can't trust you. You killed my brother. That's the problem."

Her eyes plead with me to let her finish. I nod and she continues. "I'm furious with my brother for trading me. It doesn't make any sense to me. All this betrayal and the lies. They keep adding up to one thing, and it's me getting played on both ends."

Massaging her hair, I don't know what to say. Damn it. How do I make this better? My mind mocks me, urging me to force her, but I shut it down. I might as well be honest with her.

"This is true as well. You'll have to figure out on your own how to trust me. Or not. It's totally up to you on how your life here goes."

I let go of her hair, and she huffs at me. Aribella turns back toward the window. "I'm aware." With her head turned, I can't see her eyes, and that irritates me. I need to see what she's feeling. Even the sadness.

Espresso climbs into my lap and meows. He causes me to smile and I realize why Aribella has him. He's therapeutic.

"It's not going to be easy. I understand you need time and I'm willing to give you some. Just know you are safe. That's what matters."

Goddamn me. I keep playing those emotionally fearful cards. I hate myself for not showing her more kindness, to let her know that we can make things work. But it seems I can't let my guard down, either. Aribella sucks in a deep breath but doesn't turn to me.

Gently, I use my hand in her hair to turn her back toward me. With my other hand, I place it on her thigh. "Look at me, mi reina ."

Slowly, she turns and I see the hurt, distrust, and confusion in her eyes. The way her hurt shows takes me a step back in confidence. I can't blame her for feeling it. Not at all, but shit. I didn't know how unprepared I was to face her strong emotions.