Shadow’s Heart (Devil’s Inferno MC #3)

Chapter Forty-Two

Wreck

I didn’t think I could feel closer to Shadow, but after having him inside me last night, I can honestly say I’ve never felt closer or more loved than I did during those moments or than I do right now. It’s brought a whole new layer to our relationship, and I’m fucking here for it, but at the moment I need to stop thinking about it all. We have more pressing matters to attend to this morning. Rex is coming to The Clubhouse so that I can hand over everything I have on Dre and my search for him.

Despite the fact Shadow agreed with my plan, his face and tense body language are all telling me just how much he still holds a grudge against Rex. There isn’t much I can do to change that other than give him time to work through all his feelings. I’ve explained how I feel and my reasoning behind it. Now it’s just down to him to work past everything he’s still feeling. I know he went through a different type of hell than I did when I was in the hands of Rex, and he’s fully entitled to feel however he feels. I just hope he doesn’t take it too far with Rex when he arrives. I truly believe Rex doesn’t deserve Shadow’s wrath. The only person I believe deserves that is Megan, and she’s well and truly out of the fucking picture now.

“Are you going to be able to deal with Rex being here?” I ask him from where I’m lounging in the chair next to him. We’re both currently sitting in his office behind his desk waiting for Rex’s arrival.

“Yes, because there’s no fucking way I’m letting you meet with the guy who tortured you without me.” Shadow says, and I can still hear how much what happened to me bothers him by the tone his voice takes.

“I know you still blame him for his part, Alex, but we’ve spoken about this.”

“Yeah, I know. Doesn’t change how I feel inside though.”

“I know, and I love how protective you are over me, but Rex may be my best chance at finding Dre.”

“I’ll behave. I promise. I want Dre found too.”

Our conversation is interrupted by a knock on the office door. Exchanging glances with each other, I nod my head, letting him know I’m ready, and Shadow shouts for whoever is on the other side to enter. I’m pretty sure it’s going to be Rex; it’s not like we’re expecting anyone else. The question is, has he come alone or has he brought someone with him?

We both watch as the door opens and Rex steps through. I’m taken back by the state of the man. Gone is the confident, massive man who put my body through some of the worst pain imaginable and stood in his place is the shell of a man. He’s clearly lost weight and isn’t sleeping half as much as he should if the dark rings surrounding his eyes are any indication. It’s the look in his eyes that catches me totally off guard. They are filled with regret and sorrow. It actually makes me hate Megan even more for what she did. I wasn’t sure that was actually possible, but apparently it is. God the woman has impacted so many lives, and not in a good fucking way.

This man in front of me is the embodiment of a protector. Someone who has always fought for justice, and she used that against him. She turned what makes him who he is into a weapon for her own use. You can tell what happened plays on his mind; he’s lost confidence in himself, and that is not a fucking good thing when you think about his job and all the good he does. I really fucking hope my plan works and he can move past everything because the world really would be a darker place without him doing what he does.

Glancing at Shadow, I can see the shock in his expression. Even knowing Rex has been struggling since the truth came to light, I don’t think either one of us expected him to look this bad. We watch as he closes the door behind himself, answering the question about whether or not he brought anyone with him. He stands in front of the now closed door alone, looking as if he’s facing a firing squad. To my surprise, Shadow stands and walks over to Rex. I have no idea what he’s planning; I’m just hoping it isn’t something violent.

* * *

Shadow

Before Rex stepped into my office, I was all for being a hardass, but my first look at him changed that fast. The man is fucking broken. He’s so weighed down with guilt for what he did that it’s eating him alive. I can’t, in good conscience, make this man feel any worse than he already does. He clearly regrets his actions.

Without a second thought, I stand from my chair behind my desk and head for Rex. The look on his face as I head for him clearly shows he’s expecting me to do something to him, and he’s resigned to the fact. Actually, no, he’s accepted it and thinks he deserves it. The shock that overtakes his face when I gently place a hand on his shoulder is like a punch to the gut. This man doesn’t deserve my anger. Wreck was right when he said Rex was a victim too. Seeing him this way in front of me has brought that home in a way just Wreck’s words couldn’t. Sometimes seeing is believing.

“Rex, neither one of us is going to hurt you. Wreck doesn’t blame you one bit, and after seeing you now. Seeing the way this has clearly affected you, I no longer blame you either. You’re a victim too.” I say, keeping my voice calm and gentle.

“I don’t know what to say to that. The guilt I feel for what I did.” He stops abruptly swallowing hard.

Removing my hand from his shoulder, I wave him to follow me over to my desk and take a seat. He follows without a word, clearly trying to get his thoughts and feelings in order. I retake my seat by Wreck, taking his hand and squeezing gently.

“Rex.” Wreck says to gain his attention. “We don’t need to speak about what happened. I know you’re sorry for the role you played, and I forgive you. Now you need to forgive yourself.”

He nods his head but doesn’t speak straight away. This has got to be a total head fuck for the guy. “Thank you, but my Mom mentioned you had something only I could help you with, and if you don’t mind, I’d like to focus on that.”

“That’s fine, but let me make this clear, Rex. Whether or not you find Dre, you are forgiven.” Rex doesn’t speak, so Wreck continues. “Around a year ago now, my brother Dre disappeared, and when I say disappeared, I mean one day he was there, and the next there was no sign of him anywhere. I spent six months physically searching for him, finding and following every lead I could and nothing. There was no sign of him anywhere. It’s like he just vanished into thin air. Eventually I had no other choice but to come home and hope Tech could find something online that would lead me to him, but unfortunately he hasn’t had any luck either. I have copies of everything here for you, and I’m asking you if you’d please try and find him. I honestly believe if anyone can, it’s you.”

For the first time since Rex stepped into my office, I can see the man he was before all this shit took over his life. The task of finding Dre has just lit up the fierce man of justice inside Rex. You can literally see the determination to find Dre filling him, and for the first time in months, I actually feel real hope that Dre will be found.

“Give me everything you have, and I fucking promise you I’ll use every resource in my arsenal, and I will find Dre. Whoever is behind this would never have expected you to have my resources, and that will be their downfall.”

Wreck passes over all the physical files as well as a flash drive, and I can tell Rex is impressed with just how much information Wreck has gathered. Yeah, my man didn’t leave any stone unturned when it came to trying to find Dre, and I get it. I’d have been the same way if it was Wrath. I feel for Wreck; I have since he found out Dre was missing. I can’t imagine the pain and worry he’s constantly living with, not knowing what happened.

“This is more than I was expecting and will help me figure out where I need to focus and what’s going to be a dead end. You’ve just handed me one hell of a head start in this case.”

“I’m glad all this is going to be of use to you because it’s been fucking useless to me. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask.”

“I won’t. As soon as I have anything, I’ll let you know.”

“Thank you.” We both say in union as Rex stands and leaves my office.

His walk out of my office is nothing like how it was when he entered. Now, he’s walking with his head up, shoulders back, and full of confidence. It’s good to see, because we need him on his A game if he’s going to find Dre.

When the door closes behind Rex, I glance at Wreck and see a small smile playing on his lips. I think we’re both thinking the same thing. This plan is going to work. Rex will get back in the right frame of mind and forgive himself. He’ll also be the one to find the answer to our most plaguing question. Where is Dre?