Shadows of Recovery (Everhart Family #3)

Chapter 30

Thirty

S ophie wept and whimpered, her breaths coming in ragged gasps. The man tightened his grip, but his voice was soothing. "Hey there, you're safe now. I'm Tristan."

Could she believe him? Her mind was filled with fear and confusion, the nightmare's grip tightening with each passing second. The fear was suffocating, an invisible weight crushing her chest. Her pulse pounded in her ears as she tried to calm the frantic beating of her heart. She felt Tristan let go, and panic surged through her.

"No, please stay," she begged, her voice trembling. She believed him.

Tristan opened the door and called out, "Chris! We need help in here!"

Moments later, Chris entered the room, accompanied by a woman. Sophie blinked. Was her mind playing tricks on her? Was this her mother? She wanted it to be, needed the comfort of a familiar face.

“Momma?”

“Yes, I’m right here. Momma is here.”

Chris approached her gently. "Sophie, we're going to help you feel better. We’re going to give you some Ativan. You can trust us."

She thought about it, the rational part of her mind reminding her that Ativan would ease the suffocating panic. She nodded weakly, clutching Tristan's hand as if it were a lifeline.

Chris took her hands, his voice steady and calm. "You're doing great, Sophie. We're here for you."

Another man entered the room carrying a syringe. He introduced himself with a kind smile. "Hi, Sophie, I'm Matt. I'm going to give you some medicine to help you relax, okay?"

She glanced down and noticed the IV lock in her arm, something she hadn't noticed before. Matt moved slowly, ensuring she could see everything he was doing. As he injected the medication, a wave of drowsiness washed over her. She held on to Tristan's hand.

Her eyelids grew heavy, and the dark edges of her vision began to blur. The fear receded, replaced by a growing sense of calm. She clung to Tristan until she couldn't anymore, her grip loosening as sleep took over.

In those final moments before sleep claimed her, Sophie felt a glimmer of quiet. Maybe, just maybe, she could trust these people. As the darkness of the nightmare faded into the background, she drifted into a deep, restful sleep.

* * *

The first light of dawn filtered through the blinds as Sophie stirred awake. The remnants of the nightmare still clung to her, but the soft, familiar purr of the morning routine in the facility began to seep in, grounding her in the present. The door to her room opened quietly, and a nursing assistant rolled in equipment for taking her vital signs.

"Good morning, Sophie, I’m Renee," she said with a gentle smile. "I'm just going to take your vitals and draw some blood."

She nodded weakly, her eyes darting nervously around the room. She still felt the tight grip of anxiety around her chest, making it hard to breathe. Renee worked efficiently, checking her blood pressure, pulse, respiratory rate, and temperature, all the while explaining what she was doing.

As the vitals were taken, a nurse entered with her morning medication and a menu for breakfast. "Hi, Sophie, I'm Kayla. I’m here with your meds and the breakfast menu. You can choose whatever you like."

Sophie glanced at the medication cup. “What are they?”

“Prozac and a beta blocker. Your heart has been racing.”

Her hands trembled as she took her pills, washing them down with a sip of water. When she looked at the menu, the words swam before her eyes. Trying to shake off the feelings, she felt Tristan's presence beside her.

He was seated in the recliner chair next to her bed, his expression filled with concern. He leaned forward, taking her hand in his. "How are you feeling this morning, sweetheart?"

She managed a small, shaky smile, but her anxiety was still palpable.

Tristan's eyes softened with understanding. "I need to leave for a little while to shower and change. Will you be okay if I step out for a bit?"

Sophie's immediate reaction was to shake her head, fear gripping her heart. She couldn't bear the thought of being away from him, not yet. Seeing her distress, Tristan scooped her up into his arms, holding her close.

"It's okay, Sophie. I'll take you with me," he murmured reassuringly. He wrapped her in a blanket and asked Renee to accompany them.

Carrying her, Tristan walked out of the facility, cradling her protectively as they crossed the driveway to the home across the way. Snow crunched under his feet. Renee followed them, adding another blanket over Sophie. The morning air was crisp and fresh, a stark contrast to the suffocating atmosphere of her nightmares. The brief walk calmed her slightly, the vague familiarity of the home providing a small sense of comfort.

At the house, he explained to Renee his plan, ensuring there would be help nearby if needed. He carried her up the stairs and into the master bedroom, setting her gently in the chair by the window. The early sunlight streamed in, casting a warm glow over the room.

She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. The odor of sage and lime were familiar. Was this their home, or was it part of her crazy dreams? What if another woman lived there?

"I'm going to shower and change, but I'll leave the door open so you can hear my voice," Tristan said, his tone steady and reassuring. "I'll be right here, okay?"

Sophie nodded, her eyes following him as he moved toward the bathroom. True to his word, Tristan left the door ajar, his voice a constant presence as he talked to her from the shower.

He spoke about mundane things—the weather, plans for the day, little anecdotes from their past—anything to keep her mind occupied and connected to him. She listened intently, her anxiety slowly ebbing with each word. The sound of the water running and his familiar voice created a soothing backdrop, easing the tight knot of fear in her chest.

As Tristan emerged from the shower freshly dressed, he walked back over to Sophie, sitting on the edge of the bed beside her. "See? I never left," he said with a warm smile.

Sophie reached out, taking his hand in hers. "Thank you," she whispered, her voice trembling but sincere.

He squeezed her hand gently. "We'll take this one step at a time, Sophie."

He gently picked her up from the chair by the window, holding her close as he carried her back to the Institute. She nestled against his chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat, a comforting reminder that she was safe. As they walked, he spoke softly to her, his words a soothing murmur against the backdrop of the morning. “I promise, we will be able to go home together.”

She listened to the beat of his heart. Her head started to clear. It was their house.

When they arrived back at the Institute, Tristan set her down on the edge of the bed in her room, looking at her with a gentle, reassuring smile. "Sophie, I know you need to keep your bandages dry. Would you like me to help you take a sponge bath, or would you prefer Renee to assist you?"

Sophie's cheeks flushed with embarrassment, her eyes darting to the floor. "Can Renee help me?"

Tristan reached out and lifted her chin, meeting her gaze with kind eyes. "There's no need to be embarrassed, Sophie. It's perfectly okay to ask for help."

She nodded, feeling a bit more at ease. Tristan spoke to Renee, who had accompanied them on his shower excursion, with a warm smile and a gentle demeanor.

"Hi, Sophie," Renee said, her voice calm and soothing. "Let's get you cleaned up, okay?"

Tristan stepped back, giving them privacy but staying nearby in case Sophie needed him. Renee carefully helped her with the sponge bath, making sure to avoid her bandages and being as gentle as possible. Sophie's anxiety lessened slightly with Renee’s calm presence.

Afterward, it was time for Sophie's first Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) session with Chris Skylar. Tristan walked with her to the therapy room, staying close to offer support. As they entered, Chris greeted them warmly.

"Good morning, Sophie, Tristan.” He motioned for Sophie to take a seat. "Today, we're going to work through some of the trauma you've experienced. It's important to remember that you're safe here, and we're taking this step by step."

Sophie nodded, taking a deep breath as she sat down. Tristan took a seat nearby, ready to support her through the session.

Chris began gently, "Sophie, Tristan is with us as sort of a security blanket. Eventually, you and I will make it through these sessions without him. He’s going to only listen. Okay?”

Sophie chewed her lower lip and nodded.

“Good. Let's start by talking about a safe place. Can you describe a place where you feel completely safe and at ease?"

Sophie closed her eyes, thinking of the place that brought her the most comfort. "It's my home with Tristan. It’s cozy and warm," she began softly. "The porch is a calm place, and the trees around it are tall and green. I can hear the birds singing, and there's always a breeze. And the den has a wonderful reading corner."

"Good," Chris said, nodding. "I want you to hold on to that image. Whenever things get too overwhelming, imagine yourself in that safe place.

“Now, let's talk about what happened to you. It's going to be difficult, but remember, you're in control here. Pick any point you want to talk about.”

Sophie took another deep breath, bracing herself. "He killed Gene. He shot him because I made the mistake of smiling at him. Then…it was afternoon," she began, her voice trembling. "I was in the hospital basement by the pharmacy, and Damon... threw me into the gate. I hit my head and lost consciousness. After I woke up, he wanted to go to Central Supply. I told him to release a hostage. He threw me to the floor. I wanted him to release some hostages. He did. But then he said ‘You're mine now, Sophie. And you're going to learn to be obedient.’ He...dragged me into Room 15. An isolation room in the ER." Sweat broke out on her forehead. She started to shake.

Chris spoke encouragingly, "Take your time, Sophie. You're doing great."

"He hurt me," she continued, tears welling up in her eyes. "He beat me, and then... he..." Her voice broke, unable to finish the sentence.

Chris leaned forward slightly, his voice gentle but firm. "I want you to know that what happened to you was not your fault. You did nothing to deserve that. Can you tell me how you felt in those moments?"

Sophie choked back a sob. "I felt terrified and helpless. I thought it would never end. He was happy. His smile… his smile was evil.”

Chris nodded. "Your feelings are valid, Sophie, and it's important to acknowledge them. Let's talk about some ways to cope with those memories. When you start feeling overwhelmed, remember your safe place. Focus on the details—the sounds, the smells, the feeling of safety. Can you try that now?"

Sophie closed her eyes again, picturing her home. She imagined the calm breeze, the rustling leaves, the birdsong. Slowly, her breathing steadied, and she felt a small measure of safety.

"You're doing great, Sophie," Chris said, his voice encouraging. "Now, let's talk about some grounding techniques. When you feel a flashback coming on, try to focus on your surroundings. In the current moment, name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This can help bring you back to the present moment."

Sophie nodded, absorbing the advice. "Okay.” She did as Chris asked.

The session continued, with Chris guiding Sophie through various techniques to manage her pain. By the end, she was emotionally exhausted, her body trembling with the effort of confronting her raw memories.

"That's enough for today, Sophie," Chris said kindly. "You've done really well. It's important to take care of yourself now. If you need to rest, that's perfectly okay."

Sophie looked over at Tristan, her eyes filled with fatigue and a silent plea for comfort. Tristan immediately moved to her side.

"Can you hold me?" she whispered.

Tristan nodded and wrapped his arms around her. "Of course. I'm right here."

He held her close, his presence a comforting shield against the lingering shadows of her ordeal. As she leaned into him, the exhaustion began to ebb, replaced by a fragile sense of security. In Tristan's arms, Sophie felt the strength to face another day, one step at a time.