So Pucking Wrong (Thin Ice #9)

Chapter Four

If he didn’t have Tanner at his side, Harlan might have been nervous. Security had alerted them of Rider’s arrival. They had taken their time cleaning up and dressing. Things had moved even slower because they kept stopping to kiss. It was like Harlan moved through a dream. He knew any second he would wake up and everything would feel incredibly insane. But like any dream, nothing felt wrong because it wasn’t real. In no time, this would be over. They would look back on this and laugh. For now, Harlan clung to the wisps of the natural high. Being with Tanner was exhilarating, which was exactly how Harlan knew it couldn’t last. Someone like Tanner didn’t get tied down like this. Harlan was the same. They were unique to each other for now. Soon enough, that would fade.

Together, they headed for the sitting room, prepared to face the firing squad together. As they approached the doorway, Tanner’s hand landed on the small of his back. It was the tiniest gesture, but he knew they looked like a team as they stepped into the room. Rider looked thunderous. Ben sat on the loveseat, looking completely unfazed. Of course, he was the calmer of the two.

“What in the fuck are you two doing?”

At Rider’s question, they exchanged a glance. A silent message passed between them. Harlan would handle his brother.

“It seems you already know the answer to that, or you wouldn’t be here.” He moved to the couch and sat. Tanner filled the spot next to him. He draped his arm across the back, crowding Harlan’s space and showing a united front.

Rider pinched the spot between his eyes. “This is so fucking wrong.” He dropped his hand and focused on Harlan. “Exactly how long has this been going on?”

Harlan didn’t know how to answer that one.

Thankfully, Tanner obviously did. “Since I threw that surprise party for you.”

Rider dropped into the spot next to Ben on the loveseat. He looked between them. “That’s almost a year. Neither of you said anything.”

Harlan shrugged. “It’s not like we talk. Why would I tell you this?” As the words left his lips, he realized he was kind of pissed. Rider never called and asked how he was. Now he was here, demanding answers. “I also don’t recall hearing anything about you getting married until Mom told me.”

Rider didn’t take the bait. “There’s no way this is for real. What are you two up to with this? Tanner is too spoiled to ever settle down and you’re too much like Dad.”

Oooh, Harlan was good and pissed off now. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Rider’s light blue eyes softened. “You know what I mean, Harlan. He never stayed faithful to Mom. With the number of women who claim I have nieces and nephews running around, you can’t tell me this marriage will be any different from theirs. You can’t even take care of those kids and they’re your blood. Tanner will be acting like Mom in under six months. I care about both of you, and I can already see you two hating each other’s guts in under a year. This won’t end well.”

With every word Rider spoke, Harlan’s anger grew. While he recognized he had never truly defended himself against any baby-making claims, he hadn’t thought he needed to with his family. “It seems you made up your mind about me a long time ago, so this seems like a pointless visit. Go home and go back to forgetting you have brothers. You’re better at that than this meddling.”

“Harlan, I know I’ve—”

Harlan swiped his hand through the air. “No. I don’t want to hear it. You ran away from this family as fast as you could and didn’t look back. Now you’ve decided to show up just in time to prove you don’t know me at all. If you did, you’d never accuse me of abandoning a kid. I don’t want to defend myself anymore about those false claims. You don’t deserve to hear me say I’ve been struggling against people who tell lies just because they want money. All the while, I’ve had nowhere to turn. Until this moment, I didn’t fully understand why I’ve felt that way. Thank you for clearing up the matter. I have nowhere because I have no one.” Harlan knew he had to look as outraged as he felt and sounded. He couldn’t stop.

“Tanner is the only person to ever listen to me and believe me without question. All the while, my so-called family has walked around like I’m their secret shame. As far as I’m concerned, you don’t deserve to know about my relationship with Tanner any more than any other detail of my life. Go home and believe whatever the fuck you want. You’re not needed here.”

Ben looked genuinely sad.

Rider’s expression had closed halfway through Harlan’s speech and hadn’t changed. He stood. “I’m sorry.” For a moment, his mask slipped, and Harlan saw his brother. Sadness washed over him. For both of them. They were who their parents had made them, which was two very different people. Without making excuses on top of his apology, Rider focused on Tanner. “Thank you for being there for my brother. I hope you two have an amazing life together.” He turned away and held his hand out for Ben.

Ben accepted. He cast them a quick glance before letting Rider pull him to his feet. “Congratulations.” Without another word, the pair left them behind.

Harlan stared straight ahead, focusing on nothing. Seeing nothing. He regretted every word he had said. Unfortunately, that didn’t make them any less true. Tanner was the only person who treated him like he was proud to know him. He was heartsick, and the worst part was, this marriage wasn’t real. Tanner would make it go away, and Rider would think he had been right all along. For the first time since he woke to this new reality, Harlan questioned himself. A drunk mind reached for sober dreams. Maybe he really wanted this marriage after all.

Tanner sat in silence with his arm over Harlan’s shoulders. He brushed his thumb back and forth across a cut valley there that kept him fascinated. He didn’t know what to expect. It was very possible Harlan would explode at any second. It was equally possible he would shake it off and act like he hadn’t just poured out his heart. Either way, Tanner was here for it. He would follow Harlan’s lead.

“As much as it pains me to admit, I like you a lot more than anyone else.”

A laugh burst from Tanner at Harlan’s words. He could be such an asshole. Tanner loved his company. “The feeling is mutual.”

Harlan didn’t laugh, nor did he look Tanner’s way. “I said that to say this. I can’t let Rider be right about us.”

Everything inside Tanner froze. He didn’t dare hope. He had thought he would have to use his lawyer and the courts as a stalling method. “What do you mean?”

Harlan finally turned his head and met Tanner’s stare. There was so much pain in Harlan’s eyes, it hurt Tanner’s chest. “What can I do to convince you to stay married? I don’t mean permanently, and I don’t expect you to change your life or anything. I just don’t want Rider to have another excuse to think less of me.” He looked away. “That probably sounds dumb as hell. I need to let you go. None of this is your problem.”

Tanner kissed the shell of Harlan’s ear. He didn’t want this moment to be about Rider, but he would use him as an excuse. His lips moved to the spot behind Harlan’s ear. He pressed a light kiss there. “You’re incredibly beautiful and amazing. Anyone would be honored to be your husband, especially me. I won’t embarrass you.”

Harlan drew a shaky-sounding breath.

Tanner knew he had him. He touched Harlan’s chin, hoping for his attention. Harlan didn’t hesitate. He turned his head and let Tanner have the kiss he wanted. Their tongues stroked. Desire crackled in the air. Triumph roared through Tanner. He wasn’t a fool. He knew they had a huge mess of complications in front of them. Not only did they live in two different countries, but their homes were also over twenty-five hundred miles apart. He could relocate and live here, but New Orleans honestly wasn’t much closer to Los Angeles. Harlan had a career people would die to have. He couldn’t give that up for Tanner, and Tanner would never ask that of him. He had a few months until his season started. Tanner would fix everything somehow. They would figure out something. What Tanner wouldn’t do was let Harlan get away. He needed to give Rider a raise. In a span of minutes, Rider had sealed a deal Tanner had been working toward for a year. He had practically handed Harlan to him, gift wrapped. Now Tanner had to find a way to make it last forever.