Sorrow (Cape Frost #1)

11

Hayes

The second she leaves my room, I want to follow her. I don’t know why, but something about the way things ended today has me feeling off-kilter. I expected to feel weird after touching my best friend’s little sister, but that isn’t what’s giving me pause.

It’s just... her.

Aside from her usual attitude and ‘fuck you’ personality, I’ve never seen anything that told me there was so much going on inside of her. But after stripping her bare in one of the most personal ways and hearing her open up to me, it feels almost cruel to let her go sleep alone.

Not that I can do anything about it .

With my hand gripping the door handle, I let my forehead rest against the wood and give myself a moment to think. I can’t go into Boo’s room where she’s sleeping, I can’t invite her to stay. So where the hell does that leave us? Her as my fuck-doll at night and someone I don’t say more than two words to in the sunlight? It’s kind of fucked up, but in reality, I’m not the one who initiated this.

I’m not using her, she’s using me. She’s using me for the one thing she knows I’m good for, and then she’s going to leave this town behind with a man that isn’t me. One she believes to be husband material, not fuck-buddy material.

And why do I care?

I don’t.

But why is it — nah. No. I don’t.

I won’t.

––––––––

The next morning, I stay in my room longer than usual. I listen to her and Boo have breakfast before I even shower for the day, then stall for a couple more hours until I finally make my way out around noon. It’s probably a cowardly move, but it’s hard to know how to react in this situation. It isn’t like there’s a How To Secretly Fuck Your Best Friend’s Little Sister guide for dummies, so I’m winging it here. I don’t exactly have a choice.

Maybe I should write one after she’s got her two-and-a-half kids and a white picket fence.

“Damn, you slept in,” Boo chides, grinning at me like he knows I got laid. I didn’t, not really, but I definitely did... something. “Fun night?”

“Something like that.” I’ll humor him. I have to if I want to keep this up. Luckily for me Samara’s in Boo’s bedroom at the moment, so I don’t have to worry about how she feels about it. Not yet, anyway.

“Is this a repeat or a new one?”

“New.” I glance over at the hallway before I can stop myself, then back at him quickly in hopes he didn’t notice. He didn’t. He’s looking at his phone again. “You?”

Puzzled, he frowns up at me like he doesn’t know what I’m asking, so I nod down at his phone. “You’ve been on that a lot lately. Are you having luck on those dating apps?”

“Pfft. No. I’ve been working so much I haven’t opened any in a while. Probably should, though.” It’s his turn to look around for his little sister. “Need to fuck something, if you know what I mean. ”

“Fuck yeah, I do.”

He chuckles at me. “You got laid yesterday, Hayes. There’s no way you know what I mean. You don’t even know what a dry spell is. You can pick up your phone right now and have your dick inside someone within the hour. Not all of us have that luxury.”

He’s wrong, but I’m not really in a place to tell him that. He needs to believe I can fuck anyone at any time if I’m going to get away with fucking the hell out of his little sister and walking out of my room with marks everywhere on my body. I can tell she’s the type, I just have to awaken it.

Just the thought has me hardening in my jeans. I lean forward to brace on my knees to hide it. “Yeah, that’s true. I’ll probably just call the new one over again tonight.”

“You fucked someone with Samara in the next room?” he asks. “I assumed you went to her house.”

Well shit, I didn’t think of that. “We were quiet.”

“Bullshit,” he whispers with a laugh. “There’s no way she didn’t hear it.”

“Did she say something?”

Shaking his head, he releases a sigh. “Guess she didn’t, and I’m not really in a place to tell you not to have sex in your own house. I’m just thankful she’s here and I know she’s safe. I don’t trust anyone else to protect her.”

Yeah, I’m gonna need him to stop saying shit like that.

“Besides,” he continues. “I know you’d never invite someone over here that you didn’t trust. You don’t let many people even know where you live, so you must really like this new girl. Is she worthy of meeting me?”

He’s right. I don’t usually invite friends here, and I’ve never invited a hookup. He knows that, so now he thinks I’m in love or some shit. Great. “Not yet. I’ll let you know if that changes.”

I turn the tv on before that conversation goes any further, then move over to the kitchen to put together some breakfast for myself. Or lunch seeing as it’s late as fuck, but whatever. I just need to eat.

For a while, I forget about everything else as we watch SportsCenter together like old times — well, I watch and he mostly sleeps — but the second he stands up to go get ready for work, all of it comes rushing back.

Samara only came out of the room once in that time, and I swear I could feel her gaze even though it was obvious neither of us had the balls to look at the other. How the fuck did I get here?

When Boo leaves, the sound of the door cracking open has my dick swelling like it’s being summoned by a siren. And I guess in a way, it is. A virgin siren fucking up the way my brain is wired every time I think of how it’s going to feel when her blood is coating my cock and I own her in a way no one else ever has. A way no one else ever can . She can cast me aside and try to forget I exist, but I will always have her virginity, her innocence.

But not yet.

I have to have patience.

“Is he okay?” she asks quietly. “Other than needing to get laid, I mean.”

“You heard that, huh?” I look her up and down, taking in her tight little black tank top and green panties. I can’t help myself now that I know the face she makes when she comes. “He’s fine. Stressed and tired as hell, but he’ll be alright. Are you okay?”

She nods, licking her lips slowly enough to draw my gaze. “I’m as fine as I can be.”

“And what about last night?” I ask. “Are you still fine with all that too?”

Her cheeks tinge pink as she walks a little closer. “Yes. Thank you for doing this, Hayes. I know it can’t be easy for you. ”

Touching her is easier than she thinks, it’s the rest of it that’s hard... especially holding back. I just can't say that out loud. “You’re welcome. Are you ready for another lesson?”

“Yes.” The steadiness in her voice surprises me. She’s barely breathing, barely moving. At least she’s convincing. “What did you have in mind?”

It should be embarrassing how quickly my cock thickens, but I don’t care. I want that pretty little mouth. Beckoning her forward with two fingers, I spread my legs wider to accommodate her, then nod down toward the floor. “Kneel for me.”

Her little hands ball into fists as she wills herself to obey me, stutter-stepping forward until she’s ungracefully sinking down. We’ll need to work on that, but for now? Just seeing her like this is good enough.

It’s clear she isn’t wearing a bra, and my hands reach out of their own accord to cup her breasts and swipe my thumbs over her hardened nipples. “We’re going to take this a step further today, Hurricane.” I brush under her chin and tilt her gaze up. “Do you know what a safe word is?”

“Not really.”

“It’s a word you say when you want me to stop everything I’m doing. If you want to just say stop, then we won’t touch on that kind of play, but I personally think a safe word is better. Sometimes your mouth says ‘stop’ or ‘I can’t’ when your pussy says keep going. They’re just not always on the same page.”

She nods, letting out a soft breath. “I understand. What about ‘Frost?’ Would that work?”

“Yeah, Frost works just fine. Only say it if you mean it, and I won’t stop otherwise. Since my cock is going to be in your throat, just tap me if you need to breathe. Here.” I guide her hand to my knee where I want her to tap, then sit back on the couch. “Take off your tank top and then pull me out. Don’t put it in your mouth yet.”

Her fingers tremble as she slides her top off, but her eyes don’t leave mine. “I just want to make sure you mean that if I tell you to stop, you’ll keep going. If I say no, you’ll keep going. Frost is the only way to get you to stop?” As I nod, she reaches to pull me out of my sweats. “Good. I don’t think I’ll be able to handle very much, but I need to learn. Even when it hurts.”

“Yes, you do. Something tells me you might enjoy it more than you think. Stroke it, and as you touch me and suck me, make sure to look up at me every so often. There’s nothing like the sight of your cock in a woman’s mouth as she gazes up at you. It’s like we can feel that you’re enjoying it too and you want to please us.”

We’re about to find out if she’d ever make it as an actress. We both know she doesn’t want to please me, not after everything I’ve put her through, but if she wants her little endgame badly enough? She’ll fake it hard enough to convince me.

“Like this?”

Her hand twists too gently as she pumps it up and down, stopping just shy of my balls and my piercing with each movement. Fuck, it honestly wouldn’t be enough to feel good, but just knowing I’m the only one she’s ever touched like this? That I’m the one taking this little piece of innocence from her?

It’s fucking unraveling me.

I don’t even recognize my voice as I growl down at her that she’s a good girl. “Such a fast learner. Squeeze just a little tighter for me.”

She overcompensates, but backs off when I tense up. That middle ground is fucking perfect. With wide eyes and without being told, she leans forward to lick a bead of precum from my tip .

It makes me hiss. “Do that again, slower. Savor the taste of me so you never forget it.”

“Trust me, Hayes. I won’t forget.”

Samara slides her hand faster and tongues my slit, letting out a breathy, heady moan that makes me want to split that pretty mouth in two.

“Wrap your lips around it and suck it how you think I’ll like it. Show me what you got.”

My hips thrust up to chase her down, but nothing could’ve prepared me for what it would look like when this girl slides me into her mouth. Seeing her cheeks hollow out and her eyes flutter sends a wicked bolt of desire through me, and when she sucks? It’s every sick fucking fantasy I’ve ever had come to life.

Eager to please, she tries to take too much at once and chokes when my piercing reaches the back of her tongue.

Watching her sputter around my dick feels almost as good as it does when she’s sucking. She needs to be ruined just like I am. “That was good,” I praise, reaching out to press on her forehead right between her eyes. “This will help with the choking. Take a deep breath and try again.”

As startled as she looks by the gesture, she trusts me enough to sink lower. She’s just not opening her throat. Reaching down with my other hand, I grip her neck lightly and tell her to relax it for me.

She tries, she does, but she still has to pull off to catch her breath twice before she finally figures it out.

It feels almost too good when she succeeds.

“Oh fuck,” I groan. “Just like that. Throat is so tight, Samara. Look at you sucking your first cock like you were always meant to be on your knees. I’m not going to guide you with words for a little bit, I want you to pay attention to my body language.”

Slowly, I roll into her to urge her to keep going. She’s not the most naturally gifted, but she’s smart — keeping her eyes on my face, adjusting when I tense up or don’t seem as into it, and she knows without being told that if you find something that works, you don’t fucking stop.

This girl has me so close to the edge I have to pull her off by her hair just to catch my breath. “What?” she gasps, face covered in saliva. “I wasn’t done.”

Fucking little Hurricane.

Fighting against my hold, she gets me halfway into her throat in one movement. It’s as far as she can go without help, but now, I don’t care if she likes oxygen or not.

Time to see what she’s really made of.

I place one of her hands on my knee as a reminder and brace both of mine on the back of her head, then rock deeper than she’s been able to comfortably take me this entire time. “Now you’re gonna take it, girl. You’re gonna take every drop of your big brother’s best friend’s cum. Fuck, all the times I imagined fucking your little throat.”

I definitely didn’t mean to admit that, but the way she bucks like she’s trying to get off me feels so good. She’s still not tapping, so I don’t consider stopping until she has tears streaming down her cheeks.

Even then, with the way she’s gagging, choking, and struggling, I find it difficult to pull myself away. But one thought has me tugging her off and allowing her to have air. “Say my name.”

I need to hear it.

I need to hear it right now with her voice wrecked and breathless all because of me, and I need her to know exactly who’s making her fall apart.

Me .

“What?” she gasps out, tits catching the saliva dripping down her chin. God, she looks good when she’s a mess for me.

It’s intoxicating.

“I don’t ever want you to forget who you’re pleasing, or who’s making you feel like this. Say my name.”

“Hayes,” she whispers, almost reverent. “I know who you are, and I know what you’re taking from me. I won’t forget.”

Taking? Or what she’s giving? It’s hard to remember at this point. I stick my fingers into her mouth and tug down on her jaw, then lean in to spit straight into her mouth. “Use it.”

Pushing her back down, I groan as the head of my cock sinks into her throat again where it belongs. It’s so fucking wet, so hot and tight that the first time she gags, I lose it.

My fingers tangle in her hair as I start fucking up into her throat like this isn’t her first time. She’s right, I absolutely am taking. “Fuck.” My cock throbs. “Gonna come. Don’t fucking pull off.”

Her nails draw blood on my thigh as she squirms, but she doesn’t tap. She wants to, her chest is heaving and she’s choking so hard I don’t know how she can stand it, but she holds on for me .

For me. Not Nate fucking Jackson or some other asshole. For me.

I blow almost immediately. Every pulse of my cock makes her moan, and the vibrations have me flooding her mouth, throat and lungs with so much cum I’m sure she’s about to drown.

It would serve her right for making me want her like this.

Her icy blue eyes are cloudy when I’m finally done and she’s swallowed it all, looking up at me but not really seeing me.

She’s exactly where I want her, exactly where she needs to be. Suddenly I’m forced to admit I’m not training her for some other dude, not really. I’m training her for me .

I just can’t ever admit that again, not even to myself.

“I still don’t want you to pull off. Rest your head right here and breathe with me. Keep me warm, my beautiful Hurricane.”

I don’t know why I just called her that, but I can’t help it after the way she just surrendered herself to me completely.

I’m not sure I deserved it.

Yet as she lays her head on the same thigh she drew blood from and settles in, I see what that took out of her. What the world has taken out of her. There are bags under her baby blues again and scars I’ve never noticed before, and the way her shoulders slump makes me want to murder everyone who’s ever hurt her.

Unfortunately, I’m at the top of that list.

I don’t know how to fix what I’ve done, but for now, I can ensure that nothing and no one causes her harm. I’ll never tease her for this, never use it against her in any way, because I know it took everything in her to allow herself to be vulnerable for me. This is a gift, and as I feel her slip away and slowly reach out to pet her face, I don’t know how I could ever make her feel shitty again. After everything, she trusts me enough to sleep in my lap, and I’d be a real asshole if I forgot the level of devotion she’s offering me right now.

Nothing about this feels temporary, but I’m going to have to remember that it is — or else I’m going to watch her walk away with my fucking heart in her pocket.

There’s no world where I let that happen.