Sorrow (Cape Frost #1)

15

I’m almost irrationally nervous when Boo shuts his door to go to bed and I’m left alone with Hayes. Why my overly-protective brother agreed to this, I’ll never know — but looking into Hayes’ deep brown eyes almost makes me wish he hadn’t.

The man looks hungry.

He’s scanning me like he’s never seen me before, gaze lingering on the exposed skin between the hem of my shirt and my pajama shorts, and then he jerks his chin toward his room without a word.

Romantic.

I really shouldn’t be surprised.

With my heart where my stomach should be and my stomach somewhere lower, I carefully walk past him, praying I don’t trip.

There’s no way he’ll fuck me with my brother in the next room, so why are my fingers trembling as I grab the door handle ?

And why does it get worse when I hear him getting closer? I feel every step he takes until he’s locking us both inside the room. “Did you use my body wash?”

“Maybe,” I deflect. “Did you use mine?”

The left side of his lips twitches like he almost smiled. “Maybe.” One step closer. Two. “Come here.”

He beckons me closer with the same two fingers that have been inside me, drawing my attention as my feet seem to move on their own.

Whatever he’s about to do to me, at least I’ll get paid for it.

I don’t stop until I’m so close to him, my breasts brush his shirt. “Yes?”

His hand finds my jaw as he leans in, inhaling just under my ear in a way that has a shiver working its way up my spine. “I’m going to need you to stay quiet, Hurricane.”

Fuck. Oh, fuck. My hands ball into fists at my sides as I will myself not to make a sound. If he wants me to be quiet, it can only mean one thing.

He’s absolutely going to fuck me.

“I’ve never been very good at that,” I whisper. “You know it’s true.”

“I know.” For once he doesn’t look like he’s disappointed in me for something, he looks understanding. “Maybe we should cover this up, hmm?”

Leaning in, he swipes his tongue into my mouth like he couldn’t stop himself from getting a taste, and it’s enough.

It shuts me up for now.

A low growl vibrates through me a split second before he tugs himself away as if he didn’t mean to do that.

Without any other words, he slowly slides my shirt off my body.

So I guess he means really quiet.

I let him undress me until his fingertips find my panties, and all at once it hits me that this is really about to happen.

He’s going to fuck me, right here, in this house.

And I have to keep my fucking mouth shut the entire time.

It isn’t until I’m completely naked that he moves deeper into the bedroom, lifting me off the floor as he goes. “Lay back and keep your legs wide,” he says low and deep, then tosses me onto his bed.

Clinical, then. Of course.

“Wait,” I say quickly, settling into position. “Just... one second.”

I try not to look at him as I exhale slowly. After all this time, I’m finally getting what I want, but at what cost? Am I going to wake up one day and regret that I gave it to him, that my first time is basically going to be an anatomy lesson from someone I hate?

It sucks. I have to give myself a moment to admit that it sucks and I wish things were happening differently. But this is what I chose. This is what I asked for. This is what my future will be — meaningless sex with an asshole.

I might as well get used to it and never know any alternative.

“Okay. Go ahead.”

He watches me curiously a second longer, then tentatively reaches out to swipe his finger up my pussy. “Your face says one thing —” he lifts his fingers to show me how wet they are “— and your pussy says another. You’re in your head again, girl. Just breathe.”

Leaning down, he flicks his tongue on my clit before I can respond, but I catch my bearings quickly.

“I was getting myself out of my head. I’m good.”

“Mmhm.” Two fingers slip inside teasingly as he sucks on my pussy hungrily, reminding me this doesn’t have to be all bad .

He may lack empathy, kindness, or any kind of positive emotion... but the guy knows his way around a cunt.

Biting my lip, I focus on the way he looks down there. Handsome and cruel, hungry and exacting. The way his fingers stretch me makes it hard not to moan.

Every loud gasp he forces out of me only makes him slow, and when I lose the battle and whimper, it makes him stop completely.

He’s rock hard when he stands straighter and licks his lips, his sweats tenting. “Higher.” He pushes my legs up to expose me even more, then steps back to admire me fully. “Fuck.”

Adjusting himself, Hayes moves over to his nightstand to grab a bottle of something I can’t see, but maybe it’s lube? I can’t imagine his piercing fits very well without it.

“What changed your mind?” I ask.

Tilting his head, Hayes pops the bottle open to squirt some onto his fingers. Definitely lube. “About?”

When he reaches down and touches a very different hole, I forget what I was talking about.

What the hell?

“Um... ”

Smirking, he pushes my legs apart again when they close of their own accord. “Shh... You’re going to have to relax if this is gonna work.”

He tries again, sending a whole new type of fear through me.

“If what is gonna work, exactly?”

Huffing, he presses a little harder. “Hold your breath.” When I do, he raises his eyebrows as his finger struggles to slip inside. “See? Now exhale.”

Nervously, I do as told only for him to take my breath away completely when his finger enters my body.

Clearly, he still has one more thing to take from me before I get what I really need.

Somehow though, having any part of the King of Sorrow inside my ass is almost intoxicating.

I’m almost embarrassed by how wet it makes me.

“So when you said you’d fuck me, you didn’t mean my pussy, huh?”

“Oh I will fuck this pussy, Samara. I’m making my way there in my own time.”

He hums a little as he continues to stretch me, palming himself with his other hand. I may not be an expert, but I’m damn sure no one’s asshole has ever stretched enough to take someone his size.

Let alone their very first time.

Swallowing thickly, I try to relax when he narrows his eyes at me. “I talked to him, you know. Nate. He said blood makes him squeamish, that’s why he wants someone else to fuck me before he does. Do you have that problem?”

Freezing, Hayes stares at me disbelievingly for a solid ten seconds before he laughs. “Wow. Squeamish from a little blood? What a fucking bitch. No, I don’t have a problem with blood. I’d paint your fucking skin with it and still eat you alive.”

His voice deepens the more he speaks, sending goosebumps down my spine.

I wonder what he would do to me if I handed him a knife?

My stomach squirms with curiosity, a little fear, and more lust than I’d like to admit. Pain I ask for after a lifetime of pain I was forced to endure? Yeah, I think I might be okay with that.

“You like it.”

He nods, seemingly lost in thought. “Your skin is like a blank canvas, Hurricane. It’s hard not to leave my mark on you every single day, and when I think about your blood coating my dick, I —” He snaps out of whatever daze he was in, squeezing the life out of his cock through the fabric as he takes a steadying breath. “Yeah. I like it.”

Stretching me further, Hayes adds more lube as I think about his words. I fucked up by admitting Nate would never want that. Now if we ever do it, we can’t use training as an excuse. It would be for us. For me. For him.

It seems too intimate.

I want to change the subject, but he’s got three fingers inside of me and it burns. Talking seems to be the only thing distracting me. “So, you’re paying me now, right?” I remind him. “Stop holding back. You’re paying me to be your little whore, so... make me your little whore.”

Something I can’t read flashes in his eyes, but he pulls his fingers out of me without responding and begins lubing up his cock. “Keep quiet,” he warns, kicking off his pants completely before flipping me over onto my stomach.

I hear the ruffle of his shirt falling to the floor a second before his weight joins me on the bed, and I realize I might’ve made a mistake .

He was holding back for me, to protect me. To make this easier on me.

And I allowed myself to forget who I’m dealing with.

I don’t have time to gasp before I feel the head of his cock splitting my ass open. It burns more than his fingers ever could, the solid mass stretching me so wide I know I’ll be ruined when this man is done with me.

“Fuck,” he breathes, his forehead falling against my shoulder as he continues to fill me up more with each passing second.

It feels like a mercy when I feel his hips against my cheeks, knowing he has nothing else to give me. I already feel too full, like if I move even a fraction of an inch, my body will break.

And then he starts to move.

Slow, deep thrusts at first as his hands roam my body, and he fucking whimpers against the back of my neck. “So... tight.” He snaps his hips harder, shocking my system to the point that I can’t get any sound out at all. Grasping the sheets, mouth open, eyes wide — all I can do is take it.

But hearing him, knowing how it must feel? Something happens. My body shudders, I relax, and a rush of heat floods through me .

It may not be where I wanted, but Hayes Sarro — my brother’s best friend — is actually fucking me. My ass screams at me in protest the harder he snaps his hips, but feeling this man lose control because of what my body is doing for him makes it feel good. Like I want more.

“H-harder,” I gasp out, noting the way that one word makes him pulse inside of me. He may tell me to be quiet, but he could never deny what my words do to him.

“Samara,” he growls, speeding up as he covers my mouth with his left hand.

It becomes too much too quickly, making me squirm, making me scream — making me cry. But it’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. It’s awkward and painful, but satisfying in ways I couldn’t have anticipated. Hayes Sarro is tearing my ass apart.

He can grandstand all he wants, but I feel him shaking. This isn’t some training exercise with his best friend’s little sister... he wanted this. At least a little part of him wanted this, maybe even with me specifically.

The moment he moves his hand, I blurt, “Have you pictured this, Hayes? All the times I had an attitude, the fights we got in? Did you picture bending me over and splitting my tight little ass open? Punishing me?”

“Yes!” he admits loudly, all growly and angry like he didn’t mean to say it. “Fuck.”

His hips falter, fingers dig into my skin, and I swear I become a god. I get it now, why people use their bodies to get what they want. The power here, the control? He can do whatever he wants to me. I’ll always know the truth.

“You wanted to mark me, Hayes, then do it. Inside and out. Show me.”

Teeth sink into my skin so hard I gasp loudly, the warm trickling sensation of blood dripping down my shoulder making my eyes widen in shock as he continues to fuck me like an animal.

He didn’t even hesitate.

My blood is in his mouth, and instead of pulling away in disgust, I can tell it’s only made him more feral.

My head swims as my stomach gets tight. For a moment, I think I’m going to throw up or something — and then he touches me.

The friction on my clit shatters me, pushing me into an orgasm I didn’t even know was building. My tears are salty as they drip from my face onto my tongue, and I know I’m too loud .

Too fucking loud.

“Good girl. I knew it wouldn’t take much to make you come with my cock in your ass. Knew you’d be worth every fucking dollar.”

His hand clasps over my mouth again just before he shoves two fingers inside to gag me, and when my entire body tenses from the intrusion, I feel his cock jump and then a burning warmth as he floods my ass without any attempts to pull out.

His deep groan vibrates against my neck, grounding me as he continues to throb. The feeling is jarring, but... fucking addicting. I suck his fingers gently as I let my eyes close, enjoying the weight of him on top of me, how full I feel, what a mess I am. My cheeks are sticky with tears and I can feel the cold, tacky feeling of drying blood on my shoulder, but I did it.

I survived.

For a while, we just lay there coming down together with heavy breaths, his touch turning softer after he removes his hand from my face and caresses my throat. “You took me so well, Hurricane.”

Fighting a sarcastic laugh, I mumble, “Not really. I don’t think I was supposed to cry.”

Tentatively, he reaches up to swipe away my tears before the unmistakable sound of him sucking them clean fills my ears, and then I feel that sinful tongue swipe over the bite mark he left behind. “Yeah... you were.”

Fuck.

He wanted me to cry.

He wanted me to bleed.

Something tells me I should hate him even more for it, but I don’t. It’s the only thing he’s ever done to me that was honest. No holding back, no hiding. Just Hayes.

And now it’s over.

Bracing myself, I wiggle underneath him just enough to signal that I want him to get off of me. I’m surprised when he doesn’t fight me at all. Both of us hiss as he slides out, and his cum drips down my ass as he curses under his breath. “Stay right here.”

I listen. I stay there as he cleans me up like I’m something precious, allowing myself to feel vulnerable for just a little while. Every time we do something, I feel like I understand him more. He wants to break me, but maybe it’s because he likes putting me back together again when we’re done.

Once we’re both dressed and clean, Hayes pulls me in to lay on his chest, his hand mindful of my shoulder as he holds me to him and releases a sated sigh. “Sleep, Hurricane. I’ll give you the money in the morning.”

The reminder makes me jerk. Holy shit, there’s no way I forgot he was fucking paying me for this.

It’s not real. It was never supposed to be real, it’s never going to be real.

No matter how gentle he gets, I can’t forget that again.

So I sing.

It’s an old song, a quiet one, whispered to the point where my voice cuts out completely every few words — but it’s familiar to me. It’s the song I used to sing the monsters under my bed, but this time, I’m the one in the monster’s bed.

And I’ll sing him to sleep too.