40. Talia
forty
Talia
I trudge up the stairs to the kitchen, and grab a cheese stick and a cold bottle of water from the refrigerator before heading to my room. My bed is calling me.
I’m completely exhausted from my shift at the hospital. Dr. Winters has been working me to the bone, but in the best way possible. This week, she tested us on a case, and I passed easily when I caught the irregularity in the patients’ lab results. I feel like she sees my potential and has given me tips when diagnosing patients, verbally guiding me through procedures while I perform them independently.
At the end of my rotation, I can easily see myself staying on staff at the hospital to work with her. To be honest, if I had met her sooner, I probably would have become a doctor and followed in her footsteps.
She’s that amazing.
I flick on the light in my bedroom as I walk through the door and kick off my shoes. I place my snack and water on my desk, then pull my cell from my crossbody purse before chucking it on the floor near my shoes. The smell of hospital cleanser and sweat make my stomach turn.
A shower is definitely needed before bed.
I reach for the bottom of my shirt when, out of nowhere, a man’s voice yells, “Stop!” scaring the absolute piss out of me .
“Jesus!” With a spin, I jump back, clutching my chest as my heart pumps wildly in its cage. “You idiot! What are you doing here?”
My brother is lying in my bed with his ankles crossed and sleep wrinkles imprinted on his cheek. His voice is thick with sleep. “I was waiting for you, but I must have dozed off. What time is it?” He rubs his face, blinking his eyes open.
“It’s after midnight. I got stuck waiting for another nurse. I didn’t want to leave Dr. Winters without coverage. Now, answer my question. What are you doing here?”
He shrugs. “I came to check on you.”
“Nico. Don’t BS me. You haven’t come by to”—I use my fingers to emphasize—“ check on me in years. Is something wrong?”
I don’t say Cameron’s name, because I don’t know where my brother is at, but Nico is smart. He knows that’s what I want to know.
No matter how busy I was at work, Cam was never out of my thoughts. I’ve missed him so much.
“Relax, lover boy is fine. Well…” Nico scratches his head, eyes squinted, and hesitates.
“Nico, if something is wrong, you have to tell me.”
My brain goes into panic mode. Is Cam hurt? Did he get in an accident? Did something happen to his family?
“Chill, Lia. Miller’s not hurt, if that’s what you’re worried about.”
“Oh, thank God.” I don’t know what I would do if Cam got hurt.
Would he want to see me? We’ve texted here and there, but for the first time in our relationship, I don’t think either of us knows what to say.
“But…” Nico hesitates before sitting up and back against my headboard.
“But what, Nic? Spit it out already.” I’m going to smack him if he doesn’t tell me what’s going on.
He shakes his head and whistles. “He’s playing like shit. ”
“What?” That can’t be true. Cam was on a streak.
My thoughts stop dead. He was on a streak before the whole thing with Nico happened and I went back to work. And I stopped calling.
“No.”
Nico tugs on the back of his neck uncomfortably. “Yeah. It’s bad. He asked Coach to bench him.”
My mouth feels cottony and dry. Cameron is so dedicated to being the best and giving his all, every game. There is no way he would want to sit out. Right?
“Please tell me you’re kidding.”
“I wish. Even I feel bad for him.” Nico slaps the bed. “Come here and let me show you something.”
Waving a hand down my body, I tell Nico, “I need a minute. I can’t wear these dirty scrubs anymore.”
My brother nods in understanding.
I grab some pajamas and rush to the bathroom. I don’t even wait for the water to warm before getting in and scrubbing myself clean as fast as I can. When I return, Nico is watching something on his phone.
I can hear the announcer say Cam’s name. “What are you watching?”
Nico pauses the video and looks up at me. He gives me a sad, crooked smile. “Last night’s game.”
“Was it bad?”
“Come see for yourself.”
I crawl into bed beside my big brother and rest my head on his shoulder.
He leans his cheek on my head. “Ready?”
“Not really, but I have a feeling this is why you’re here.”
“Such a smart girl.” Nico pats my leg and pushes play.
Cam is standing on the mound, and I can already see the distress in his body language. His shoulders are tense, and he has a furrow between his brows. Cam is usually all smirks and knowing looks, but right now, he’s anything but happy to be on the field.
Nico, in his full catcher’s gear, makes a hand gesture behind the batter, and Cam nods. I watch him rub his hat and get into his stance.
“The pitch. You can see that distinctive stretch style of Cameron Miller, but Swanson sees the change coming and hits it right down the middle for a double, and the Evaders give up another run. This is uncharacteristic of Miller, coming off a perfect game. You’ve gotta ask yourself: is something wrong with him? An injury we don’t know about?”
How can Cam go from throwing a perfect game to this?
Because it messes with his head when you run away scared, instead of pulling up your big-girl panties and talking to him.
Water wells in my eyes as I watch a defeated Cam lift his hat and run a hand through his shaggy hair. My big guy looks as broken as I feel inside.
Nico pushes pause, cutting off the announcers. “You don’t want to see what happens next or hear what they say after this. It’s not very kind.”
“It’s that bad?”
“This was the nice clip. I can’t bring myself to show you how bad his batting was the game before.” Nico turns off his phone and tucks it into his pocket.
My chest is heavy, like an eight-hundred-pound gorilla is sitting on it, and I lose the fight against my tears as they stream hot and heavy down my cheeks. “This is all my fault, isn’t it?”
Nico hums, not agreeing or disagreeing.
“What do I do?”
“I can’t answer that for you.”
“But you have an opinion.” It’s no secret Nico doesn’t like Cam .
“If you had asked me last week, I would have said fuck that guy. But now? I get what you see in him. I’m not saying I approve, but I’m also not disapproving. Does that make any sense?”
A watery chuckle escapes as I nod. “Yes. I just… I don’t want to hurt you by being with him.”
“Neeyeh.” Nico makes a weird sound between nah and meh, making me smile. “You can’t let other people get in the way of your happiness, especially not me. All I want for you, my baby sister, is to be happy. So decide: do you love him and want to be with him or not?”
I know my answer, but I’m scared. What if my fear of being abandoned made Cam feel like I was abandoning him? Could he forgive me?
“Do you think he still wants to be with me?”
“Ugh. Why? I just want to play baseball. I do not want to talk about this mushy shit. Ever.” Nico growls, mumbling under his breath, “But if it’s the only way to get your stubborn ass to see how much you two idiots love and miss each other, fine.” He reaches over and places a bag on my lap.
“What’s this?” I ruffle through the bag, biting back my smile.
In Nico’s own way, he just gave me his approval and support. I could burst from happiness right now.
“Inside, you will find a ticket for tomorrow night’s game, as well as a locker room family pass and something to wear. And to answer your question, yes.”
Yes?
I’m only confused for a second before I remember the question I asked first.
Cam wants to be with me.
I could do a freaking dance right now. I’m so happy. Instead, I settle for hugging the first man in my life who showed me love and loyalty. The man who took care of me and wants me to be happy more than anything on the planet, even if that means me being with a guy he doesn’t like .
I throw my arms around my big brother, so thankful that I have him in my life. He might be an overprotective ass, but he really has my best interests at heart.
“I love you, big bro.”
“Love you too, sis.” He kisses my head and stands up. “Now, I need to get home because I’m fucking tired and I have a big game tomorrow.” He slips on his shoes and walks over to the door before turning back to face me. “This should go without saying, but never—and I mean never—bring this up to anyone. Especially not to Miller. Do you understand?”
With a grin, I make a cross over my heart. “I promise.”
Not! I’m so going to tell everyone how wonderful my brother is, whether or not he likes it. Starting with Mamma.
Nico exits my room with a nod.
I pull out Nico’s gift and put it on over my pajamas. As I lie back and close my eyes, all I can think about is the look on Cam’s face when he sees what I’m wearing.