Stuck With My Christmas Crush (Sweet Christmas Kisses)

18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Charlie

I ’m in the Sparkle Entertainers van with Lou and Calvin. We have a booking downtown tonight. It’s a big corporate Christmas bash and we are providing part of the entertainment. Calvin and Lou are doing their Cirque Du Soleil style acrobatic/ magic show/ dance type performance that’s scheduled after the canapes and before the band. I’m the roadie and dressed as a fairy. My job will be to make sure the performance space is set up with the props, so Lou and Calvin have what they need when they need it .

As we drive to the venue at a hotel event hall, we talk through the routine. It’s not new but Calvin always likes to add something extra to make each performance unique and fresh.

“So, when Lou comes down from the ladder, that’s when we’ll do the cross-over juggling routine with the clubs, and then end off with the devil sticks with Lou on my shoulders. How does that sound?” Calvin slows down and changes gear to stop at a pedestrian crossing.

“Yep. Sounds good,” says Lou who is in the middle of the seat between me and Calvin.

I mentally place the clubs and devil sticks at the side of an imaginary performance space. We won’t know the exact dimensions or limitations until we get there, and we may need to alter the sequence accordingly. Lou and Calvin have been performing together for a few years and have developed a trust and bond that’s strong and deep. I never tire of watching them on stage and seeing the audience react. It’s amazing what they do.

As we pick up speed again, I gaze vacantly out of the window at the festive street filled with Christmas shoppers. I’m thinking about Jason and feeling sad.

As if Lou can read my mind, she says, “It’s done, Charlie. You went. You saw Jason.” She reaches over and gently squeezes my hand. “At least you know now. That’s why you went, isn’t it? To find out. One way or another. If there was a spark or if you just made the whole thing up.”

“Yeah. At least now I know.” I turn to my friend and force a smile.

The whole city is lit up and decorated like a Christmas tree. Seeing people hurry up and down carrying bags and boxes, buying the perfect gift for their loved ones lifts my heavy heart. It seems as if everyone is happy and full of Christmas spirit.

“Sorry. I don’t know why it got to me, but it did,” I say brightly. “And… Jason and I… Yes. The spark is there. I know he’s feeling it too. It’s insane how close I feel.” I pause as I remember his hand gently holding mine. “Felt. Past tense.” Somewhere on the street outside a mechanical version of Jingle Bells plays a tinny serenade as we pass. “It all stopped when we were talking in the garage about the big old car, and I had this…” I laugh to admit my romantic idiocy. “I imagined us driving along with the top down, and I just felt so happy. Now, I feel stupid because I’ve projected all my silliness and big ideals on that poor man. He doesn’t deserve it and…” I grab Lou’s hand and squeeze it back. “He’s nice… He definitely has issues, for sure. No doubt about that. But he’s not for me.” I shake my head. “I see that now. ”

“You sound pretty sure, Charlie,” says Calvin checking the illuminated green line on the sat nav.

“I think I just realized when we were talking about what was going to happen to the hotel, I felt so sad and disappointed. It’s just a classic, It’s not him. It’s me. scenario.” I laugh. “We are just so different.”

“Different is good,” says Calvin. “You know, yin and yang. You can be different and complement each other.”

“‘You complete me’,” Lou leans across and kisses Calvin’s cheek. “Like in Jerry Maguire, Charlie.”

“Yeah, but we couldn’t be more opposite. And we’re not simply opposites. We are on completely different planets.” I sigh. “How did I ever think we could connect at all?” I pause for a moment. “And I know I sound absurd, but I don’t know if I want to be with someone who is obviously so soulless they want to give up that house.” I shake my head again and laugh some more. “And let’s not forget, he didn’t even want to make a snow angel.”

The van is quiet for a moment, then Calvin says, “He’s practical, Charlie.” He slows down and indicates to make a turn. “And that’s a good thing, isn’t it? You can understand why he wants to sell. It must be a huge responsibility. And really expensive.”

“I know. And the land value is worth more without the building. How crazy is that? But it’s such a beautiful place. You should see it before it’s torn down. Then you’ll know what I mean.”

“You don’t think that maybe he’ll change his mind and… I don’t know, keep the hotel?” says Lou hopefully.

“No. I can’t see that ever happening. He’s already said he’s not that person and he never will be. You guys haven’t met him yet. And you probably never will now.”

Then Lou says, “But Charlie, you invited him for Christmas dinner, didn’t you?”

“Yes. But he won’t come. I mean think about it. Why would he?”

“We’ll see,” says Lou. “Stranger things have happened. Don’t forget, it’s Christmas and that’s when all sorts of magic happens.”

“Lou. Christmas magic happens in the show. And nowhere else. Oh, apart from in the movies.”

Lou laughs at me as Calvin indicates a turn into the hotel parking lot. He checks the rearview and pulls the van to a stop. I open the van door and slide out followed by Lou. Time to get into performance mode and stop thinking about something that is absolutely out of reach. I grab the gear from the back of the van and we wait for our contact from the booking. Soon a smartly suited young man with an iPad approaches us. He looks us up and down .

“Hello. I’m Tim. And you must be Sparkle Entertainers. I’ll show you to the dressing room.” He checks the time. “You’ll find the run sheet I emailed you in there. Let me know if you need anything.” His hand darts up to an earpiece but he keeps walking briskly. He nods a couple of times then he says, “The dressing rooms are just through here. The green room is at the end. Help yourself to refreshments.” He pauses to listen to his earpiece again, then says, “Excuse me, one moment.” He pushes open a door with a restricted access sign. “I’ll be right back.”

Lou, Calvin, and I watch him scurry away to where a crew of people dressed in black arrange balloons and decorations and rig lighting equipment onto scaffolding bars. Someone is testing the sound, one, two, one, two .

“It would be so awesome to…” I begin voicing a thought.

“To what, Charlie,” asks Lou who is close enough to hear.

“Ah, nothing. Just an idea.” I smile at my friends and shake the thought away. It’s time to concentrate on the evening’s show.