Taken by the Blood God (Devil Springs #4)

Chapter 26

Chapter

Twenty-Six

Minerva

Sela came back within ten minutes, a tray holding two iced coffees in one hand and a big brown paper bag with thin handles in the other. The scent of vanilla, cinnamon, and chocolate wafted into the shop with her.

She locked the door again. Then, she turned toward me.

“You’re taking the rest of the day off.”

“Oh, I am?”

“You are,” she confirmed.

She ushered me back toward the reading room, using her body to herd me. I found myself laughing as she bumped my hips with hers and said, “Hurry up. I’m dying to dig into this bag.”

“What did you get?” I asked as we went back into the reading room and shut the door behind us.

“I don’t know for sure. I told Marjorie to give me a bag full of treats for someone who was having issues with their love life and to be sure there were two of everything.”

I laughed again. “She probably thinks you and the police chief are having issues.”

Sela rolled her eyes. “She knows that’s not true, but I also didn’t want her to know this was for you. You like to keep your personal life private, and I don’t blame you, so I wouldn’t even tell her if they were for a man or a woman.”

I stopped next to the round table and blinked at her, surprised she’d noticed that about me.

“Thank you,” I murmured.

She took one of the iced coffees from the tray and put it front of me. “Since I went whole hog on the pastries and cookies, I got basic iced coffee with milk.”

“That sounds good,” I replied, picking up the cup to take a sip.

As usual, the coffee was perfect. Marjorie might be a banshee, but her food and drinks were sheer magic. Well, not really magic, it was skill, but she was the best, and we were blessed to have her in our little town.

“Let’s see,” Sela muttered. “We have brownies, snickerdoodle cookies, macarons…oh, she put in some fried pies, too! There’s apple, peach, and chocolate.”

“I’ll take a chocolate fried pie.”

Sela looked up at me and grinned as she handed one to me.

While I took a bite of the fried pie, Sela dug a snickerdoodle out of the bag.

We ate our treats in silence for a few minutes. My body relaxed as the taste of chocolate and coffee mingled on my tongue.

“Okay, now that we’ve had the first hit,” Sela said. “I have a question for you.”

“Shoot,” I said before I took another bite.

“You told me what happened but not how you feel about it.”

“What do you mean?”

“How do you feel about all the things that have happened lately? About Talant?”

My stomach twisted at her question. I hadn’t really thought about it. As soon as I realized that my chest joined my stomach in writhing. I had no idea how I felt. About any of it. About what happened in the cave. Talant. Davian. Even Ally being mated and never coming back to our house. My house.

With shaking hands, I tucked the last bite of the chocolate fried pie in my mouth and chewed. The bite seemed to dry out in my mouth, so I washed it down with a swallow of iced coffee. Sela watched me silently as I did all this, her expression sympathetic. Finally, I swallowed the pastry and chocolate in a hard gulp.

“I don’t know,” I admitted.

It was the first time in decades that I wasn’t in touch with my emotions. Since my power had manifested at the age of thirteen, I’d sought to identify how I felt, especially when my life was so chaotic. Understanding and moving through emotions was the only way a witch could control her power. A witch without control was a danger to everyone around her. Maybe that was the problem. I’d exerted so much control that I’d completely distanced myself from how I truly felt. I wasn’t in touch with my emotions because they were on the other side of the wall I’d built around my heart. To keep others, no, myself safe.

“I haven’t thought about it before today,” I continued.

“So, think about it now,” she replied.

This called for more chocolate. I reached out and snagged a brownie. Marjorie made the best I’d ever tasted. I couldn’t quite figure out how to make mine taste as good, though I knew she added a dash of instant espresso powder and a little extra vanilla.

I broke off a corner and popped it into my mouth. The fudgy goodness seemed to melt on my tongue. As I savored it, I tried to sort through my tangled emotions, but they slipped through my fingers like thin threads of silk. I broke off another piece of the brownie as soon as I swallowed the first. It still didn’t help me figure out how I was feeling. Defeated, I slumped down in my chair and looked at Sela.

“I can’t do it. Every time I try to name my emotions or untangle them, it’s like they shift away. The inside of my head is so chaotic and messy.”

“That’s because falling in love is chaotic and messy,” Sela said, popping an entire macaron into her mouth.

Suddenly, I was no longer slouching. I was sitting stiff and straight, staring at her in disbelief. “I’m not falling in love. Who would I be falling in love with?”

She arched a brow at me and smirked. “An arrogant blood god with a smoking hot body and a tendency to bite?”

I shook my head. “No. No. Absolutely not. Whatever is between us is too…too furious and crazy to be love. Real love is warm and sweet. It’s gentle. Not toxic and…and…” I threw up a hand. “Whatever the hell he and I have. It hurts just as much as it feels good.”

I followed Sela’s example and shoved the rest of my huge brownie in my mouth, chewing viciously.

The smirk on her face faded and she leaned forward to put her hand on mine. “Minerva, I realize that you’re my mentor in all things magical, but I’m going to say something, and I want you to really listen to me.”

I nodded, still chewing.

Sela’s fingers wrapped a bit tighter around mine. “You said that things between you and Talant are furious, and they hurt. That love should be sweet and gentle.”

I kept nodding as I swallowed the brownie.

“Well, maybe it hurts because you’re fighting this so hard. You talk about a witch being in touch with her emotions and how that’s the key to controlling her power. To be in touch with your emotions, you must accept them. To move through them.” She squeezed my hand. “If you accepted them and dealt with them head-on, would it change?”

It was my turn to raise an eyebrow at her. I sipped my iced coffee to wash down the last bit of brownie. “And how do you know so much about this?”

“Lots of therapy during my teen years,” she answered, waving her free hand. “Stop avoiding my questions.”

I sighed. “You’re right. I’m fighting myself.”

Sela released me and sat back.

“But I know that letting myself fall for a blood god is a disaster waiting to happen.”

She shrugged. “I thought the same thing about falling in love with a werewolf, and now look at me.”

I scowled at her. “That’s different. Talant isn’t like Garrett. That werewolf worships the ground you walk on. He would do anything for you. He lives to take care of you.”

“It sounds to me like Talant wants to take care of you, too.”

My first instinct was to brush off her words, but I stopped myself before I opened my mouth and thought about what she’d just said. I also thought about Talant’s words and actions over the past few weeks.

Why didn’t I want to believe that he cared about me? The epiphany seared through me like a lightning bolt, making my scalp tingle and my eyes burn. I didn’t want to believe it because it was less dangerous if I kept him at arm’s length. If I didn’t let myself care about him.

A strange stillness washed over me, the tumult in my stomach and chest calming almost instantly. I’d been in such a state of stress for the past few weeks that I’d no longer noticed the fine tension that ran through my muscles every waking moment.

“You look like you’ve come to some sort of conclusion,” Sela commented.

I blinked, focusing my gaze on her.

“I have.”

“Want to share?”

“Not really.”

She scowled at me. “I just bought you one of everything from Marjorie’s bakery. The least you can do is tell me if I helped you or not.”

“You helped me,” I replied, getting to my feet.

Sela stared at me, annoyance practically dripping from her pores. “And?”

“And I feel better.”

Dropping her head back to stare up at the ceiling, Sela groaned in frustration. “You are the most irritating woman I’ve ever met. And that’s saying something considering that Cari is my best friend, and she lives and breathes to irritate me.”

It was my turn to smirk at her. “I’ll be sure to tell her that the next time I see her.”

Sela got to her feet, gathering up the treats and stuffing them back in the paper bag. “She already knows because I say it to her face at least once a week.”

I laughed and stood, moving to wrap my arms around her.

“Thank you for bringing me coffee and pastries and forcing me to talk to you,” I said, squeezing her in a tight hug.

She sighed and turned to hug me back, her long arms squishing me into her. “You’re welcome, my annoying little witch friend.”

I laughed, and she flinched, pulling away from me.

“That tickles!”

“What?” I asked, stepping back and holding my arms out to the sides.

“You laughing against my boobs!”

I couldn’t contain my snort at her words. “Well, you were the one shoving my face against them by hugging me like the Hulk!”

Sela snatched up the bag of baked goods and her coffee. “I’m taking these with me since you’re keeping secrets. I’d take your coffee, too, but I’m pretty sure you have blood god cooties since you’ve been slobbering all over him.”

I kept laughing as I followed her out of the reading room. “Can’t you just be glad that you helped me?”

Sela stopped next to the locked front door of the shop. “Oh, I am glad. But that doesn’t mean I’m not pissed that you won’t tell me what you were thinking.”

“How about I tell you after I talk to Talant about it?”

Her eyes narrowed as she stared at me. “Fine, but I’m still taking the food.”

“That’s okay. I’ll go buy my own.”

“That’s it. I’m leaving before I lose my temper,” Sela shot back.

I flicked my fingers toward the door, unlocking the bolt. She rolled her eyes and shoved the door open.

Before she walked out, she winked at me. “I expect you to tell me all about it tomorrow. The day after at the latest.”

I shrugged. “We’ll see.”

Her irritated scoff lingered in the store as she marched out, letting the door shut heavily behind her.

I couldn’t stop smiling as I watched her march away. It had been so long since I had a true friend that I’d forgotten how much the presence of someone who cared and who listened could help.

I wouldn’t forget again.