Taken by the Blood God (Devil Springs #4)

Chapter 32

Chapter

Thirty-Two

Minerva

As soon as I cast the spell to keep Davian and Talant out of the house, I took a long, scalding hot shower. I washed dirt, dead grass, leaves, and ash from my skin. I tried not to think about what created the ash as I scrubbed it away because every time I did my stomach clutched and rolled, threatening to rebel.

Once I was clean, I braided my damp hair, dressed in my rattiest, comfiest pair of yoga pants and a loose t-shirt that nearly reached my mid-thigh. I needed the comfort of soft clothes and warm blankets. At least for today.

My stomach growled after I got dressed, but the idea of food also made it turn over. Finally, I settled on a bowl of orange sherbet. The icy treat settled okay, but I still didn’t feel well. Probably because my heart was broken.

I’d fought against my feelings for Talant for as long as I could. And just when I accepted that I was falling in love with him, he proved that I couldn’t trust him.

I was half-tempted to pick up the phone and call Sela, but I knew she would come over, and I wasn’t ready to talk to anyone yet. I needed some time to sort through my thoughts and feelings. Basically, I wanted to stew. And brood. And maybe get drunk.

Getting drunk sounded like a good plan at the moment. Sure, the responsible part of me knew it wasn’t my best idea, but my heartbroken side said that numbing the pain for a little while was necessary.

I was in the kitchen pouring myself a glass of sweet red wine when the back door opened, and Davian walked in from the sunroom. I set the bottle of wine on the countertop with a thud. “You have got to be kidding me! What the hell, Davian? How did you get past the spell?”

He stopped a few feet away and crossed his arms over his chest. His eyes dropped to the glass of wine in my hand. “Drowning your sorrows?”

I rolled my eyes. “You know what? I don’t give a shit how you got past my spell. Get out if you’re going to be a dick.”

He sighed. “I’ve told my brother time and again that love makes people stupid. I see that it even applies to you.”

I snarled at him and set the glass of wine aside as well. I pulled up the long sleeves of my t-shirt, preparing to throw his ass out using whatever means necessary.

He held up a hand. “I’m sorry. All I meant was that you’re a very smart witch, and you should have realized that the binding spell you placed on me carried a trace of your magic, which means?—”

“My ward recognized you and let you through,” I finished for him with a sigh.

He nodded.

“Okay, that still doesn’t explain why you would bother coming inside when you know that I’m not happy with your brother. Or you.”

“How am I to blame in this?” he asked.

It was my turn to cross my arms over my chest. “You mean you didn’t know the same things that Talant did? And you didn’t keep them a secret either?”

He winced at my words. “Good point. But, in my defense, I told my brother he should discuss this with you, sooner rather than later.”

I rolled my eyes and snatched up my wineglass, swallowing half of it in one gulp.

He took a step closer. “You’re not her,” he stated. “Not truly.”

My only answer was to glare at him and finish off the glass of wine. I reached for the bottle to pour another glass, but his next words stopped me.

“Cassia was nothing like you, Minerva.”

I took a deep breath and continued to pour myself another glass of wine.

Davian seemed to take that as an invitation to continue, because he kept talking.

“You have sharp edges and a dark sense of humor. Your tongue is edged like a blade. You never back down from a confrontation, even when it might be safer to do so. Cassia was pure sweetness. She never let a cross word pass her lips. If she was angered, she wanted to talk it out, to discuss what happened until she understood. Then the situation could be handled in a way that she felt was appropriate. She loved unreservedly, but she wasn’t fiery or full of passion. She was peace. And joy.”

I lifted the glass to my lips, ready to drain another glass of wine because his description of her just made me feel worse instead of better. It sounded like Cassia was everything I wasn’t.

Davian took another step forward. “You aren’t her. Talant knows that. What he feels for you isn’t because you carry her power or her memories. You aren’t Cassia reborn, like you said. You’re a vessel for her magic, not a new version of her. My brother fell in love with you because you are so different than she was.”

I shook my head, drinking more wine. “It doesn’t matter. He lied to me. He knew what I was, and he didn’t tell me. It wasn’t just selfish, it was dangerous.”

He cocked his head to the side and studied me. “You want to be loved for who you are. That’s understandable. So does he. What are Cassia’s memories of him, witch? The god he was then—is that who you want?”

I flinched. I couldn’t control it. There was no way I would have fallen in love with Talant if he was anything like he was then.

Seeing that his question had gotten beneath my skin, Davian continued. “He wanted to give you time to see him for who he is now. As someone who’s been in his shoes, spending over a millennium imprisoned but conscious, that kind of experience can change someone. He is different now. I told you that before.”

He paused, as though he wanted his words to truly sink in. “I’m different as well. I still don’t share your love for or desire to protect humans, but I no longer wish to rule them or harm them. I just want to live in peace. Even if I must exist among them.”

“He may have changed, Davian, but he lied. I’m not sure I can get past that. It wasn’t a small fib. He kept a pretty damn important piece of information from me. How can I ever trust anything he tells me again?”

He was clearly getting impatient. “And you’ve never lied to anyone because you were worried that it would cause them pain? Or that it would change the way they saw you?”

I winced again because I hadn’t exactly told Ally about what was going on with Talant and Davian. Or that I’d been hurt. As much as I hated to admit it…he had a point.

“If you’re afraid, you should be honest about it.”

“Why would I be afraid?” I asked.

He scoffed. “Because you’re not in control here. Neither is he. You two are the biggest control freaks I’ve ever known. You can’t call the shots with each other, and neither of you knows how to handle it.”

The sadness that clung to me earlier was getting pushed out by annoyance. Because I knew he was right, but I wasn’t ready to admit it.

“And you know better?” I asked.

Davian shook his head. “No, I don’t know better. I’m as fucked up as the two of you. Just in different ways.”

I sighed. How could I argue with that?

“Once you’ve cooled off, talk to him, Minerva. Treat him the way you would want to be treated if you made a mistake or the wrong choice.”

Fuck. How did the biggest asshole I’d ever met become the voice of reason in this situation?

“Fine, I will. It may take me a while to calm down, though. I’m pretty pissed off at him at the moment.”

“He’ll wait. As long as it takes.”

I wasn’t sure if Davian was right, but this talk did convince me of one thing—Davian needed to have his freedom. He’d been trapped for far too long, and it was clear that he’d changed. It was time for him to move on if he was ready.

“I release you from your vow to remain in Devil Springs, Davian.” The magic chimed as the binding spell was broken.

Davian stared at me in shock, apparently rendered speechless by my actions.

I smirked at him. “I can’t wait until you’re the one who makes a mess of things so I can be all superior and knowing and throw advice at you.”

That seemed to break through his surprise because he smirked. “I look forward to it,” he said, bowing his head. When he straightened, he continued, “I’m not leaving yet, though. Not until I know my brother is okay. But after that…”

I nodded.

“Now, I’m going to gather some things because you need your space, and my brother needs me. Though you won’t let him in the house, I doubt Tal will go far, so I supposed we’ll be nearby.”

“Have at it,” I said, gesturing with my now empty glass. “Just be sure your brother keeps his distance.”

Davian shrugged as he headed out of the kitchen toward the staircase at the front of the house. “I’ll do my best.”

I topped off my glass of wine and carried it into the front parlor. I needed to take the time to calm down and think. I also needed to give myself the space to feel. Suppressing my emotions in favor of logic would only help me in the short term. I would have to work through my feelings and figure out what I truly wanted.