Talk About… Rivalry (Rockwood Valley Omegaverse #2)

6. Sidney

Sidney

I was an absolute fucking wreck. I couldn’t find it in me to reject his date offer, but I hoped the note and my number would distract him for now. I’d ducked out of The Landing while Taylor’s back was turned and practically flew home with how fast I was driving.

Honestly, I was lucky I didn’t wind up with a ticket.

Uncle Dale was in the fields and I saw him try to get my attention but I ran straight to my cottage slamming and locking the door behind me.

The moment I leaned against the door, chest heaving, I lost it. Tears streamed from my eyes as a sob choked out of me. I collapsed where I was, hugging my knees to my chest and sobbing out every ounce of hurt in my soul.

It was just too much. My body ached from holding it all in and my heart hurt.

My phone dinged and I pulled it out, blinking away my tears to read the message from Taylor. I responded with a quick joke to try and make myself feel better before tossing it across the room.

This was all I ever wanted. To be truly seen by one of the men I’d pined over. Yet now I just felt worse. They wanted me and I could never fucking have them.

They may say they choose me now, but I knew when they found their scent match it would be over in a heartbeat. I always heard omegas and packs gushing about scent matching. How it was this all-consuming urge to have the other person, to commit their scent to memory, to ride out heats together, and no one else mattered as much.

Fate and biology mixed in perfect harmony.

Except within me.

I was and always would be damaged goods.

Pushing myself to my feet, I stumbled to my couch before collapsing again, snatching a pillow and screaming into it with everything I had. The tortured yell helped unwind some of the tension in my chest but it wasn’t quite enough to mend the gaping wounds this week had left behind.

It was only half past one, a good six hours before I could get a drink. Maybe I’d been to Whitaker Brews a bit too often in recent years, but I swear some days it was the only thing keeping me together.

What I needed was a distraction and a shower. I could easily text Avery but I knew damn well she’d see right through me and my best friend had enough on her plate being pregnant with triplets.

The walk to the shower nearly drained what little energy I had left, but I couldn’t just sit here and wallow. I’d done enough of that over the years.

As my old therapist always urged, allow myself to feel it then find a way to cope. Fuck, I really needed to get in contact with her again.

I dropped one of the shower bombs I’d bought from Cohen’s shop into the shower and kicked up the heat. It needed to be almost skin melting to bring me out of this one-woman pity party.

The scent of fresh forest air and morning rain hit me. I always preferred the earthy scents over sweet. Soon the bathroom smelled like I was taking a shower in the middle of the forest. I stripped out of my clothes and stepped inside, letting the hot water soothe me.

With my eyes closed, all I could see was Taylor’s eager face. He was full of hope and excitement as he asked me on that date and I had to try and let him down easy.

Only when the water started to cool did I rush through washing up. My phone was ringing in the other room and this time I didn’t shy away from it, wrapping a towel around myself and hurrying to catch it before the ringing stopped.

Grace’s face was on the screen since she only ever video called. I answered and flashed her a view of my towel.

“You always call me when I’m half-naked. I’m starting to think it’s on purpose,” I joked.

Grace’s face flamed red but she rolled her eyes.

“It’s a better idea than spending another night alone in my apartment. Tell me you’re up for a sleepover? I’ll even make you food and mixed drinks.”

“Girl, sign me up, I could use a drink or two and this way the Whitakers won’t judge me for drinking at the bar again,” I half-joked. Drowning my bad days in alcohol couldn’t become a habit.

She laughed but started going on about her day at work and her awful messages on PackVlog’s dating app. Not everyone got lucky like Mama Whitaker did. She found Charlie in a few days. Poor Grace has been fighting off creeps for months. They took one look at her sweet face and love for all things pink and cute and figured she was an easy target.

Grace was cute but she was more stubborn than me. She didn’t get mad often but she would be a force to be reckoned with if she did unleash the full brunt of her attitude.

“Alright, see you as soon as you get here, I’m going to go set up,” she said, hanging up with a bright smile. Apparently, she needed company and I needed a distraction.

Grace and I had been friends for years and we were almost as close as Avery and I, especially after Avery left. I had a feeling Grace worried—with Avery being back in town—I’d drop our friendship, but I wasn’t that type of friend. We all hung out together now and individually. Plus, they were very different people, it wasn’t like either was replaceable.

It took every bit of energy I had left to throw on comfy clothes and drive across town.

Grace had a cute, little house just off of Main Street. It was painted dark blue with white accents, reminding me more of a coastal vibe than mountain, making it stand out. Then again, so did Grace. It fit her.

She had the door open before I even climbed out of my car, ushering me inside with a wide, cheerful smile. Everything about Grace exuded happiness. Maybe that was why we worked so well as friends. She could brighten a mood without effort and I craved that happiness more than I cared to admit.

“My mom tried to come over but I turned her down. Girl’s night sounds way more fun,” she said, giving me a conspiratorial wink. “Plus, all she’d want to do was talk about work and no thank you. I don’t need to know all of the latest nursing home gossip.”

“Sounds riveting,” I snorted.

She huffed out a laugh. “Girl, the stories she’s told would shock you. Those geriatric baddies know how to get down.”

Now we were both laughing. Just like that some of the heaviness weighing me down lifted.

Grace had already set up the sectional like a cozy nest, full of pillows and blankets like usual. The TV was waiting on her list of Romcoms. That was about all Grace watched. I saved my trash reality TV watching for mine and Avery’s hangouts.

“So, are you going to tell me what’s wrong so we can enjoy The Princess Bride ?” Grace called out as she shuffled around the kitchen loading up a tray with snacks and sweets. Instead of diving into the cozy nest she made, I followed her in and made two glasses of ice, added straws, and grabbed drinks from the fridge.

I didn’t answer her until I sat down and took a handful of gummy bears, chewing on one before looking up to find her watching me expectantly.

“Ugh, why do you hate me?” I groaned, not really wanting to get into it, though I knew it would make me feel better. Grace was fairly level-headed, even if she liked to think the best of people.

“I don’t, Sid, I’m trying to help,” she reminded me. Her patience had never wavered when dealing with me. Sometimes our friendship felt like it started with a hostage situation and now we just were friends and there was no going back. Honestly, wasn’t that how the best friendships started?

“So, Taylor asked me out today,” I said. Even though I was quiet she was listening intently enough to catch it, her gasp breaking the silence.

“Shut up. You accepted, right? You’ve been pining over that omega for months.”

I glanced up and her smile faltered, then fell completely.

“Dammit, Sidney!” She growled. “Stop punishing yourself. You don’t even know how he is going to react to finding out about your scenting.”

“It won’t matter,” I said, letting my head drop so she couldn’t see the tears forming. “In the end, every relationship I have will end the same.”

“No, you only think it will,” she accused. “Not everyone finds their scent match. Some mates are chosen and that’s okay. If they choose you, I don’t see the problem. Stop punishing yourself for things out of your control.”

“I’m not punishing myself.” I was saving myself. There was a difference.

“You are,” she said, refusing to budge. “You are miserable and you want him and he wants you. Yet, you’d rather force yourself to be miserable than give him a chance. Is it worth saving yourself some potential but unlikely heartbreak?”

“Yes?” I asked before realizing how awful it sounded said out loud like that. “It’s safer.”

“And lonely,” she said gently.

“I gave him my number so we could be friends. I didn’t outright reject him. Yet.”

She perked up at that.

“Wait, so you didn’t say no? We can fix this, Sidney!”

“Uh, no, we can’t,” I said, clutching my phone to my chest like she might snatch it. Her green eyes flickered down to it and back up to me. She was no longer cute and sweet, she was a woman on a mission.

“Text him,” she demanded. “I bet he flirts. Just let him take you out once and see how you feel after.”

“I’ll feel the same,” I bit out. She winced and nodded, sitting back like I’d slapped her.

Fuck.

“Grace...” I trailed off, not sure what I was even going to say.

“No, it’s fine. Hailey always tells me that I’m pushy,” she said, giving a small smile. “Sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped,” I said. “It’s just stressful.”

“Movie time,” she announced, snatching the remote and starting the movie. She had relaxed again, snuggling against me, but wasn’t going to be letting it go.

My phone was heavy in my hands as the movie played, only half paying attention and half fighting with myself on texting.

As if Taylor knew I was thinking about him, my phone dinged with a message. Grace sat up so fast she started to tumble from the couch until I caught her.

“Is it him?”

I peeked at my phone and nodded, mouth open but words not coming out.

Taylor: Hey sunshine, how is your night going?

It was a simple message, too. God, I felt like such a dork. This was ‘high school crush’ behavior, not grown-ass woman behavior.

“Text him back,” she demanded, eyes dancing with excitement again. I didn’t want to dim that light for a second time, or at least that’s what I told myself as I picked up my phone to message him back.

Sidney: Just watching a movie with my friend Grace. How is your night?

There, that was simple, easy, and I sounded normal. That was a win at least.

Taylor: Oh, what movie?

Sidney: Our favorite. The Princess Bride.

Taylor: Shut up. I love that movie.

“Oh, invite him over!” Grace said, snorting when I glared at her.

“No,” I grumbled, knowing damn well that would be awkward. Even if he was an omega, too.

Taylor: Leading up to my last heat, I had a movie marathon. It helped distract me while the suppressors worked their magic.

I had nothing to say to that. Suppressors were useless for someone without a normal heat. Which, he obviously didn’t know about me.

“Just tell him. If you’re right, then you won’t have to keep talking to him. If you’re wrong, he may just stick around,” Grace said. Her voice was gentle as she hedged around the topic that haunted me. She knew how it affected me and was just looking out for me, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it.

Sidney: How is your night going?

Taylor: Better now. I like talking to you, sunshine

“Ugh, he even has a nickname for you,” she groaned longingly. “Girl, you’re crazy.”

Grace started the movie again. I hadn’t even realized she’d paused it during my inner crisis.

“I am, but I’d rather be crazy than heartbroken.”