Talk About… Rivalry (Rockwood Valley Omegaverse #2)

20. Sidney

Sidney

T he waiting room was filled with a mix of pregnant and nervous omegas. I was definitely in the latter category. My leg was bouncing incessantly while my fingers twisted in the hem of my shirt.

If they didn’t call my name soon, I might scream.

Thankfully, the doctor had fit me in as soon as he could today. My frantic email last night was enough for him to jump into action.

I honestly doubt half of it was coherent.

By the time the nurse had taken my vitals and put me in a room to wait for him, I was even more of a mess.

My anxiety had gone to new heights, making it hard to breathe. Nausea was rising with every single breath and my head started to spin like I was going to pass out.

Dr. Graves opened the door and took one look at me before closing it firmly and walking over. He rested his hands on my shoulders, eyes determined and voice firm.

“Sidney, you take a breath right now,” he ordered. There was no arguing with the gruff tone.

I sucked in a shaky breath that sounded pathetic even to my ears, but I clung to the calming sound of his voice as he eased me through several more breaths.

Finally, after a few minutes my breathing had calmed to normal. My head was still throbbing but no longer spinning and my stomach had settled a fraction.

“Now, walk me through what happened.” He wasn’t wasting time, likely hoping like I was that getting this over with would help.

My cheeks burned as I recounted the details of the night. He listened to every word, no judgment, his gaze as he soaked in all the details. I gave him everything from my jealousy spiking at Maverick being asked out on a date to the rest of the events unfolding on said date.

“And you caught a hint of someone’s scent? Not just a normal, everyday scent?”

If it wasn’t asked as gently as he did, I might have been angry.

With another shaky breath, I nodded. “Yes, it was like two overlapping together. Maybe, more. I don’t know for sure. It happened so quickly, then it was gone again. It was… different.”

“Different? How so?” he questioned, looking concerned now. Nothing about my case had ever been normal so I don’t know why he was surprised.

“My chest has been tight and my emotions are kind of all over the place. I’m not due for heat yet, or a pretend one, but then again who the fuck knows when that’ll actually come?”

The bitterness in my tone was sharp, but I couldn’t help it. All this chaos wouldn’t be an issue if my heats and scents were normal.

He let out a small chuckle and nodded his head. “As I said before, I had a feeling that when you meet mates that it could kickstart this part of you that’s been dormant. I’m unsure which, if not all of these men, that you’ve described are your mates. But someone assuredly is. For you to get a glimpse of a scent like that is a huge step in the right direction, Sidney.”

Now that I’d unloaded everything, I was exhausted. It felt like I hadn’t slept in years. Thanks to this newest mindfuck, I tossed and turned all night, barely sleeping.

It wasn’t like this doctor was a counselor. I wasn’t about to unload everything on him, but then again he was used to working with omegas and he knew me better than any other medical professional in my life.

He knew all the deep intricacies of my lack of scents and messed up heats.

So, when he looked at me and asked what happened next, I didn’t hold back.

“I freaked out and I left.”

He chuckled. “You wouldn’t be the first omega to find a mate and then run from it. Meeting a scent match is this visceral, vulnerable moment that is overwhelming. The more you get to know them, the more your reaction will even out.”

“What if it doesn’t?” I questioned, swallowing hard. “What if this is all I ever get?”

“You asked me that question almost every time we meet, Sidney. This is already more than you’ve ever had before. This could be exactly what you need.”

Then he shifted in his chair, fingers gripping the file in his hand as he gave me a serious look. Dread pooled in my stomach. Whatever he was about to say, I wasn’t going to like.

“We now know that you have the ability, it’s just been dormant. I am even more convinced now that when you find your pack and are claimed by your alphas, biting and setting that bond, that it will fix itself.”

The world screeched to a halt as my pulse thundered in my ears. He was asking me to take a leap of faith and gamble with not only my future, but theirs.

“I can’t ask this pack to claim me if I’m not their match. If we’re wrong then I’m taking away their chance at fate.”

“Not all of us find scent matches, some of us just find someone we are scent compatible with, and that’s okay. Chosen mates are just as important.”

The way he said it was too familiar and convincing to not be something that he held close to his chest. He chuckled a little at the way I was studying him and nodded his head.

“In fact, my omega is chosen,” he confirmed. “There are too many factors in this world for every pack to perfectly align. If you think you found someone that you’d like to spend your life with, then you have to embrace that, Sidney. You can’t hide forever.”

“I know,” I admitted, my voice small. I closed my eyes and took another calming breath not wanting to let any panic get in the way. “What would you do if you walked out of this office today and found a scent match?”

He gave me a soft smile. “I would explain to her that I was a bonded alpha.”

The way he spoke, as if it were that simple, was wild. The pessimist in me wanted to say that everyone would say that until faced with that moment.

He gave me a moment to process before continuing.

“Now, I could give you some heat suppressants so you don’t go into a heat, but I think from the stress, and the scenting, your heat is coming. Swiftly. It will likely be a true heat, not like the ones you’ve experienced. In my professional opinion, I think suppressors would hinder any chance you have at fixing this.”

I let those words sink in.

For all my other short bursts of heat, I’ve been locked away in my tiny cabin alone. I couldn’t exactly waltz three men to my tiny cottage on my father’s property.

“How long do you think I have?” I asked in a quiet voice. He looked relieved that I wasn’t panicking.

He let out a breath and ran a hand over his chin trying to think it over before answering. Everything Dr. Graves did was well thought out and I trusted him implicitly.

“I’d say no less than a week to two weeks. It would be smart to get your plan in place now. You do have options. There are heat rooms at the Network Clinic if that’s what you’re worried about. It’s not always ideal for every omega, but you can reserve them early and rent a nest there ahead of time, Sidney, if that’s what you need.”

His compassion wasn’t helping me hold myself together.

“I’ll think about it,” was all I said.

With that he patted my shoulder one last time before gathering his things. “Call the office anytime. They will route the call right to me, I’ll make sure they know. Be careful, I wish you luck.”

“Thank you,” I whispered. My doctor gave me one last reassuring smile before leaving the room.

My head was spinning and I really didn’t know what to do with myself now.

Honestly, my first instinct was to call Avery but she’d been so busy with her pregnancy and was also insanely close to giving birth. I didn’t want to burden her or stress her out.

Not to mention, I was a terrible fucking friend and had yet to admit that I wanted her brother.

Fuck, this just got even more complicated.

Hopping down from the table, I stumbled my way out of the office and out to my car. My hands were shaking so bad that it took me three tries before I could even get my keys in the ignition.

If I were to try to drive like this it would be an accident waiting to happen.

Instead, I pulled my phone out and called Grace. She answered me on the first ring, taking one look at me and her smile faltering.

“Sidney, talk to me, what’s going on?”

Just like I had with Dr. Graves, the moment I opened my mouth, the entire story was spilling out. I gave Grace quite a few extra details I’d kept from Dr. Graves, but by the time I finished she had a hand over her mouth, eyes comically wide, as she absorbed every detail I threw at her.

“Holy shit, Sidney, this is huge. This means you could actually have a pack and scent matches. You didn’t think you would ever have that.”

“Yeah, and I’m still on my dad’s property and I don’t want to go to the clinic.”

“Dude we’re in Rockwood Valley. There are cabins you can get all over. Just rent one for the week, or the next two weeks. You barely go out and don’t pay for your drinks. You can’t tell me you have nothing in your savings.”

We both knew I did, but that wasn’t the problem.

“As enticing as that sounds, there’s also the issue that most of them don’t allow heat rentals. There’s too much risk for damage.”

“You have to talk to your pack, Sidney. You have to tell them what’s going on.”

“What if they walk away?!” My voice was now bordering on hysterical.

“Then they’re idiots, Sidney. You can’t change that if they are, but I have a feeling that not one of them is going to walk away.”

She said it with so much confidence. I wished I could do the same. All I ever wanted was to have a pack.

Now I have a chance to have one. This heat could change everything for me.

Taylor had made his intentions clear. He may not have a knot, but he would be there for me.

Maverick was still a wild card. I had no idea if he wanted in or out. I’d been in love with him since we were teenagers and the thought of not having him there made my skin crawl.

Then there was Leo. It was clear there was hesitation when he first connected with me again and I felt like some of the rivalry we had when we were kids was still there. But now, after spending the evening together, there was something different. He was Taylor’s best friend, so he couldn’t be all bad, but during the dinner it felt like we were on the same team for once. I liked it more than I could reasonably explain.

Could I even trust him with this?

“Sidney!” Grace yelled, her voice loud enough to shake me out of my panic. She was concerned enough now that she started talking in a huge rush. “You can’t drive yourself anywhere and I can’t leave work, but I’m calling someone to come get you.”

Before I could protest, the call ended.

I leaned forward, banging my head against the steering wheel, wishing that I could just get my shit together. I’d never felt so vulnerable and unsettled in my life. I’d always been strong and independent. I took care of myself.

The idea of letting them in knowing that they could really hurt me was so fucking hard. I didn’t know how to do it.

Tears started falling before I realized it until I was full-blown sobbing. All of the emotions had come to a head: anger, frustration, hope, need. It all spilled down my face in hot tears, evidence of years of pain.

I was so fucking lonely that it hurt. Every night that I went back to my cabin to just my sweet cat, it was a reminder that I didn’t have a close family and I had no one to come home to.

Sure, I had friends, but it was different. They were there for me but had their own lives, were forming their own packs.

I’d be forgotten again.

I was crying so hard that I didn’t hear anyone approach my car. The door was wrenched open, the sound jarring me out of my panicked breakdown.

Maverick was on his knees next to me, his hazel eyes full of concern.

“Sidney, baby, talk to me. What’s going on?”

I tried to open my mouth to speak and it didn’t work. The tears just fell faster. He cursed and I heard him tapping at his phone for a few moments before he unbuckled me and pulled me into his arms.

He settled right there on the concrete in the parking lot. He held me to his chest, rocking me back and forth as he whispered words of encouragement. I didn’t absorb a single one in my fog but I clung to the deep rumble of his voice.

The years of tension were leaking out of me, bit by bit, and Maverick was here to witness it all. He didn’t protest. He just held me close, wiping the tears away and smoothing out my hair.

I wished I could believe it, that those words would be enough to chase away the fears that had been clinging to me for god knows how long.

When the sobs had quieted to silent tears, he shifted me so I was sideways, his hand firm but gentle on my jaw as he turned my face toward him.

“Sidney, tell me what’s wrong.”