Teach You to Love Me (Lindon U #4)

Chapter Seventeen

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Matt

T he two coffees in my hands warm my palms from the cold air nipping at my skin. Stepping into Anders Hardware is an instant relief when the heat encompasses my otherwise frosted body. The cold snap that hit the northern east coast made it abnormally cold. It took everything in me to come here when Caleb told me to meet him to talk about something.

“Hey,” I greet, passing the former running back one of the cups I got from Bea’s Bakery. “It looks great in here. You’ve done a lot of work.”

Ever since his dad passed away before the new year, he’s been working ten times harder on cleaning up the store and trying to drum up business again. DJ and I have helped him a few times, but I think he prefers the quiet time to himself because it makes him feel closer to his father.

“What did you want to talk to me about?” I ask, leaning against the countertop. “You said something about whatever it is being a good opportunity for me.”

Normally, he isn’t so vague. But my curiosity was piqued enough to drag my ass out of bed and bear the cold.

“You know a kid on the football team named Wells? He’s one of the new running backs that took over my position.”

I rack my brain for a face to go with the name. It sounds familiar, but I can’t picture anybody off the top of my head. “I don’t know. Maybe? I’ve only been to a few of the games. One of the new coaches is a fucking snake, so I don’t really feel like going and watching him fuck up the team more than Pearce did toward the end.”

Okay, maybe it’s judgmental of me to call Coach Kelly a snake since I’m mostly bitter about his obvious interest in Rachel. But still. He hasn’t exactly built a name for himself at Lindon. Certainly not like Pearce did.

“I’m actually kind of glad you said that,” Caleb says.

Confusion twists my expression.

He shuffles through his bag until he produces a piece of paper, sliding it across the counter toward me.

“You thought of me when you saw a job posting for the university?” I ask in confusion.

“It’s for coaching. Wells came up to me a while ago saying he thought I should consider it, but I had way too much on my plate to even entertain the idea. Then I wondered if I should reach out to someone in HR because they’re willing to pay for grad school during my employment.”

I look up at him from the paper. “Why didn’t you reach out then? If they could take some of that stress off your shoulders, then it’s worth a conversation.”

He’s been stressed about grad school—paying for it and having the time to go to classes and take over the store. They don’t have much help here, especially not when he’s at school.

“I’m actually going to be taking a break after this semester. Right now, I want my attention to go to the store and family stuff. Dad was right. I don’t need this degree. If I change my mind, I’ll come back to it, but I have other things to focus on. Adding coaching into my schedule would have been impossible when I barely had time to even get my schoolwork done as it is now. It’s not in the cards for me.”

I frown at the thought of losing my friend. I’d still have DJ, but still. Damn. “That sucks, man. So you’re leaving the university in May?”

“Don’t miss me yet. I’ll obviously be here, and you know where my apartment is. But yeah. It’s time for me to step back and stop trying to do it all, like you guys keep telling me.”

I’ve been trying to tell him that all semester, whenever we’d find time to meet up. He’s been beating himself up for not being able to juggle a million things at once. The poor guy thinks he can be Superman, but he forgets he’s human. I’ve always respected his hustle and dedication, but everybody has a breaking point.

Glancing down at the paper again, I can’t help but feel a nudge in my gut that I don’t quite understand. “So you think I’d be good for this? I’ve never been much for leadership.”

I didn’t even know any coaching positions were still being looked for. And the thought of me helping the new players…Well, it would put me back on the field. But how would I feel not being one of the guys on it?

Caleb nods. “You know the same things I do, and you said yourself the current coach is a joke. What better way to change that than to be the change the team needs? You’re in grad school too. You’d be just as well off getting the financial help. Plus, if you’re on staff, then maybe things with you and Rachel won’t seem so damning.”

Her name perks my ears up. Normally, everyone is telling me to quit pursuing her. Not that they know the actual details of what has or hasn’t happened between me and our former adviser. “You’ve really thought this out, huh?”

He shrugs a shoulder. “I’m looking out for a buddy. You should call them or pop by the office if you’re interested. But, Matt? You’d make a great coach. This is your chance to prove that. I know how you miss that life.”

I do miss it. So damn much. Having to sit and watch the games, watch the Dragons struggle through every single one, kills me. But I never considered being part of the coaching staff until now. And with Rachel…

Maybe I’m a dick for admitting it, but I do. “I have to admit, part of the fun with Rach was the chase. That got old though.”

I’ve barely seen her since coming back from break. I don’t go to her office. Don’t text her. I want to do both of those things, but I know she needs space to think. To figure out what she wants. I remind myself that every time I see her across campus and step toward her before stopping myself.

I grab the paper and fold it, tucking it into my back pocket. “Thanks for this,” I say, patting the paper safely tucked away. “I think I’ll reach out to them this afternoon.”

I glance briefly at my phone to check the time, then at the door, before turning back to Caleb. “You’ve probably heard this a lot from your mom, but I know your dad would be proud of you. I’ll miss bugging the shit out of you on campus, but I think the move you’re making is a good one. Selfless.”

His tone is a little rugged when he offers me a thick “Thanks” in response. He clears his throat. “Hey. Before you go…”

I wait, seeing him shift his weight from one foot to the other. “You okay?”

“You’ve had a good life, right? Being adopted didn’t make any big changes that you regret or anything, did it?”

I blink. “Wow. Uh…”

I wasn’t expecting a question like that. Caleb is only the second person that I dropped the truth bomb on about being adopted when we got talking about my parents. Rachel was the first. I never felt like I had to divulge that information, but it was obvious that they both needed to hear it because of their own situations.

“No. All the changes I went through were good ones because of my parents. I doubt I’d say the same if I were with my biological ones, whoever they are. My dad says life has a funny way of putting us where we need to be. We may not always understand it, but we should never fight it.”

His Adam’s apple bobs. “Thanks. Again.”

I dip my chin in acknowledgment, backing toward the front door. “Oh, by the way, DJ texted about the celebration party for Shelldon.” I want to roll my eyes over his tortoise’s name. “They’re doing RSVPs so they know how much pizza to order. It’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles themed.”

Caleb snorts and can’t help but smile at the ridiculous event. Because seriously. Who plans a party for a pet tortoise? DJ does. “I still can’t believe Skylar agreed to getting him a tortoise.”

“The things we do for love. Am I right?”

Caleb glances down, that smile only growing bigger. He must be thinking about Raine when he says, “Right.”

After I head back into the frozen tundra, I can’t help but think about Rachel.

What things would I do for love?