Tell Me It’s Right (Sweetspire #1)

Chapter 47

Chapter Forty-Seven

GRACIE

Weeks pass, and my days start to feel more like a routine. The girls are nice in the office, but I decline the next time they invite me to happy hour, then they don’t ask again. The only people I’ve run into in my building so far have been much older than me. I’ll get an occasional smile in the elevator, but everyone for the most part minds their own business.

The check-in calls and texts from family and friends die down as the novelty wears off. All except Liam. Talking to him every day is one thing I can count on.

But other than driving up to see me the first weekend I was here, I haven’t seen him in person. He’s had a lot going on with his family, so it seemed even if I made the trip out there, it wouldn’t have been a good time.

But now as my third weekend in a row with no plans rolls around, I throw together an overnight bag, climb in the car, and drive.

“Oh my God, Gracie! What a surprise!”

“Hey, Mom.”

She opens the door wider and waves impatiently for me to come inside, her eyes on the duffel bag in my hand.

“I hope this isn’t a bad time.”

“Of course not! Your father is at the grocery store. I’m just baking some banana bread.”

“So that’s what smells so good in here.”

She beams, and I follow her to the kitchen. The counter is covered in junk, as usual, and I grab a bar stool and start clearing myself a little area.

“So are you just back for the weekend?” she asks lightly.

My hands freeze around a pile of mail. I have no idea why that’s what tipped me over the edge. I thought I might cry it out on the drive over here, but the hour and a half passed in a daze, like my body was moving on autopilot and I was barely conscious the entire time. But now with my mother staring at me, surrounded by the house I grew up in and the comforting smell of my favorite treat, my lower lip trembles.

Mom turns when I don’t respond, her eyes going wide when she sees my face. “Oh, honey, what’s wrong?”

I laugh. I cover my face with my hands and laugh , softly at first, then it turns into something of a sob, then it rises a few octaves and borders on hysterical.

Mom drifts toward me. “Gracie…”

“Everything,” I say around a gasp. “Absolutely everything is wrong, Mom.”

We end up at the kitchen table, and she makes me a hot chocolate to go with my banana bread, just like when I was a kid. A graveyard of used tissues surrounds us as I recount the past few weeks and talk in circles trying to explain what the hell is going on with me.

When I’m done, the concern has faded from her eyes, like she’s…relieved?

“You want my honest advice?” she says.

“Of course.”

She tilts her head back and forth like she’s arguing with herself over her next words. “I think you should break up with Liam.”

“I— what ? Wh-why?”

She shows me her palms in a what can I say? gesture. “I don’t think you’re giving this new chapter a fair chance. And I don’t see how you can like this. If you had been in a relationship before you’d gone off to college, I would’ve given the same advice. I think you need a truly clean slate. How can you really say you gave this a fair shot when you’re always wondering when you’ll talk to him next, or waiting for him to call, or coming home as much as you can to see him? You’re living your life with one foot in the past, one in the present. And Liam—I love him, I really do—but he is never going to leave this town. And I think deep down, you know that. So you feel like you can’t leave. Like you can’t find somewhere new to love, because if you do, there’s no way the two of you can work. Because he won’t follow you. He might wait around for you to come back, but he won’t move forward into this new phase of your life with you. So you feel like you can’t move into it either.”

“You think he’s holding me back,” I whisper.

The smile she gives me is the saddest thing I’ve ever seen. “I do. If you want to come back here, Gracie, by all means, you know how much I would love to have you close. But I want to make sure you’re making that decision for you. And that’s an impossible choice to make if you don’t know what other options are out there—if you’re not in a place to give those other options a fair shot. I want you to be the happiest you can be, my love. I don’t want you to look back on this ten years from now and wish you’d seen it through.”

I scrunch my nose against the burning sensation as tears threaten to boil over again. I try to picture what she’s saying. But Liam is one of the few things in my life that feels right . How could cutting out the one thing that’s making me happy help?

“I love him,” I choke out.

She grasps both of my hands in hers. “I know you do. But loving him is not a replacement for loving your life. You’re still gonna have to work that one out on your own. He makes you happy. Anyone can see that. But he can’t be the only thing that does.”