The Anti-Heroes

Chapter Twenty-Four LIV

Chapter Twenty-Four

L IV

“Happy housewarming!”

I’m greeted by Vishnu and B-Money, both of whom come bearing gifts. Vish is holding a giant Boston fern, which will look amazing on my new front porch. And B-Money is carrying something that looks like ... a frozen daiquiri machine? Fun!

“I can’t wait to see the craft room!” Vishnu exclaims. We recently discovered our mutual love of doing arts and crafts while listening to murder podcasts, so we have a date next week to do both. Not sure if it’s a date or a date , but I’m inclined toward the latter and I imagine he is too. We shall see. He did recently admit to me that his brother is a complete player, so I’m really glad to have dodged that bullet, even though it hurt at the time.

“Is this a shoes-on or -off house?” B-Money asks before stepping off the entry rug.

“Whatever you prefer,” I say.

Vishnu says, “Look at these beautiful floors! They are newly refinished. Remove your shoes right now.”

“But it’s gonna ruin my drip!” B-Money grouses.

Vishnu swats him on the back of the head with his free hand. “Remove them right now!”

Begrudgingly, B-Money slips off his sneakers and places them next to the pile of shoes by the front door. Behind B-Money’s back, Vishnu winks at me. So maybe it will be a date date after all. I feel a delightful twist of anticipation in my stomach.

Emily approaches the still-open door and hands me a gift basket of wine, cheeses, and crackers, my favorite! “Sorry, there’s no plastic around it, but you know, I couldn’t.”

She kicks off her sneakers and heads to the kitchen for a drink. She’s already been here, so she knows her way around. You never know how good a friend is until they help you move. The guys follow her. “If you want to go back to the great room, Miles, his date, and Zeus are already here, playing with Romeo and Juliet. Bit of a love story going on there between Zeus and the dogs. Anyway, I’ll do the tour once everyone arrives,” I say.

The tour of my house. My house. I closed on it a week ago and moved in the next day. My very next stop was the shelter. Romeo and Juliet are senior dogs, but they deserve to spend the rest of their lives being loved and cherished, so that’s exactly what I’m going to do.

The bedrooms are still a mess, but the public spaces are practically set. I keep walking through it and marveling at how peaceful and serene it is. I’m so happy! I never knew how much I loved the word “mine.”

Michael arrives next. He’s brought me a silver whistle enclosed in a wooden shadow box. “You’ve earned this,” he says. Then he looks around. “Or you will have, as soon as you call a decorator.”

“Thank you, this means a lot to me,” I say. And it does. I place it in the center of the mantel.

“How much longer will your mom be in traction?” he asks.

“Until the hip sets, probably another week,” I say.

“Guess that was the wrong time to take a stand,” Michael says.

“No,” I assure him. “It was the perfect time.”

Ironically, the experience of actually being injured was so jarring that my mother hasn’t had a single other symptom in the last month. I’m not optimistic enough to think that her hypochondria has gone away, but in moving to my own place, I’ve stopped enabling her, and that’s the first step. That they’re making her talk to a counselor at the rehab facility is another. At some point, Dee will start speaking to me again, most likely when I tell her I scored Taylor Swift tickets through Zeus’s connections. I know we need to discuss boundaries so I’m not sucked into old habits, but I feel more hopeful than ever.

Even though my mom and sister protested, I’m in the middle of some much-needed cosmetic fixes to my old place. And when that’s done, I’ll either sell it for them or rent it out at market price. I suspect when things feel less tight financially, they’ll both be in a better headspace.

Everyone’s gathered on the couches, set up with drinks. “To Liv,” Vishnu says as I enter, and we all raise our glasses.

“To Fearless Inc.,” B-Money says, and we toast again.

“To the Eras Tour!” Zeus says.

Miles’s date, Rachel, is his female double. She found him through Instagram. Apparently, she has five Devon rexes and she thinks he hung the moon. He holds up his glass. “She’s my favorite recording artist!”

“Me too!” Rachel exclaims.

“I’m willing to admit that I don’t hate Midnights ,” Emily says, grudgingly holding up her glass.

In the last month or so, Emily has morphed back into an approximation of her old self, wearing her long hair loose and piling on woven bracelets with tie-dye tanks and jean shorts. She looks more like one of her students now than a tenured faculty member. I make note of how closely she and Zeus are sitting. Interesting.

“How’s the writing going?” Zeus asks.

“So very well!” Vishnu says. “My synopsis is finalized and I have written more than ten thousand words.”

“That’s amazing,” I say.

“Are you going to quit your job?” Michael asks.

“Well, no,” Vishnu says. “That would be a terrible idea. I must eat and pay my mortgage. Maybe someday I will quit. If I finish my book and get an agent and we sell it. And, of course, if I am able to make a living as a writer. But now, I have many things in my life to look forward to and I am no longer unhappy or afraid.”

“What’s everyone else been up to?” B-Money asks. We haven’t seen each other as much in the past month as we’ve all been so busy. I’m sure we’ll get together more regularly once we start the fall course. “I’m doing another open mic at Subterranean next week. Trying out my newest material. So amped about how last week went, I’m letting that momentum carry me.” We all congratulate him. That performance gave us a sneak peek at the potential he’s unlocking, and I feel like a proud mama bear.

“Well, I have huge news,” Michael says.

“What’s that?” I ask.

“I hired a new assistant! He does everything for me. He even carries my phone! I feel like our long national nightmare is over,” he says. “I never have to touch another computer again.”

If he wants to pretend he’s still a technophobe, I’m not going to tell how he went online all by himself and sent flowers to my mom in the rehab facility last week. It will be our little secret.

“What has been happening with you, Emily?” Vishnu asks. Look at him, leading conversations. You cannot tell me Fearless Inc. didn’t work. You just can’t.

“Well, I was thinking of taking a road trip before the fall quarter begins,” Emily says.

“Where to?” he asks.

“The Great Smoky Mountains. I haven’t been camping in ages and there’s great hiking there. It’ll be fun and you’re all invited,” she says. I wonder if her plan doesn’t include some revenge, as she’ll be just a few hours away from Nashville. She’ll tell me if she wants to.

“Do you mean sleeping outdoors?” B-Money asks.

“In tents, but yes,” she says.

“Pasadena,” he says.

“I am working that day,” Vishnu says.

“I haven’t given you the dates,” Emily replies.

“No, I am quite sure my calendar is full,” he says, as the rest of us offer up excuses too. I’ve been camping with Emily and I am never doing it again. Her idea of fun is an eight-mile hike with incline the entire way. No, thank you.

“I’m happy to go alone,” she says.

“I didn’t say no,” Zeus says. “One stipulation, though.”

“What’s that?” she asks.

“I pick the playlist for the car.”

Emily lets out a laugh. “Not on my watch.”

Our gathering extends all evening. My capellini pomodoro (minus the chicken for Emily and Miles) is a tremendous hit. It’s amazing the ingredients you can pick up when you don’t let the LuluMoms stand in your way. I feel like we’re all at new stages of our lives, stages that will be more satisfying, fruitful, and connected. I couldn’t be prouder of how far we’ve come.

As everyone begins to drift toward the door, B-Money asks Emily, “Are you at all bummed that our man’s not James Bond; he’s just James Bird ?”

“Not one bit,” she says. “I’ve had enough espionage and subterfuge to last a lifetime.”

“Hey, it’s gotten too dark for you to ride your bike home. Do you need a ride?” B-Money asks.

“No,” she says. “I’m just going to put it in the back of Zeus’s Suburban.”

Wait, they’re leaving together ? Before I can say anything, Emily makes a slashing motion across her neck. Message received. I’ll just scream inside my heart then. Woo!!

“Hey, before everyone goes, let’s get a class picture for Insta,” Zeus suggests.

Rachel poses us around my fireplace and the dogs gather at our feet. “Scooch closer, everyone. Closer!”

We throw our arms around each other, delighted with the odd little family unit we’ve formed.

“Everyone, say ‘cheese,’” Rachel instructs.

“No,” says Zeus. “Say ‘fearless.’”