The Christmas Ornament (Evergreen Lake: Under the Mistletoe)

Chapter 8

eight

RUBY

A few hours later, Sab and I are sitting where I fell earlier. She found me sitting here when she popped in early and as soon as she saw me, she walked behind the bar, grabbed a bottle of wine and two glasses. She poured us each a glass of wine and sipping on my wine with my bestie, my mood started to improve. Especially when I handed her the latest Cassie Laelyn novel from her Fallen Guardians series. Sab excitedly gushes over all her heroes and then she gets onto Blaine, the bad guy. Cassie somehow has made the bad guy hot and intriguing and I cannot wait for his book. I’m totally rooting for him and fate to end up together and if that doesn’t happen, I’m gonna be pissed off but whichever route she takes, I know it’s gonna be phenomenal.

By the fire, she pours me another glass and I tell her about my encounter with Maddox and then I broach lunch with Joel. “Joel and I had a lunch date earlier but he, umm, got me mushroom soup to go with my grilled cheese.”

“He got you what?” Sab screeches, her tone reaching banshee level, indicating she’s just as shocked as I was.

“Fungi soup,” I repeat .

“But you hate mushrooms. Everyone in a hundred-mile radius knows that.”

“Mmmhmpf,” I nonchalantly reply.

“Does he not know you at all?” A shrug is all I can manage in reply, and my ever observant best friend knows something is up. “Spit it out, Olsen.”

“Spit what out?” I’m trying to play dumb because I’m not sure I want to voice it, but she gives me her “don’t insult me” look, and then my mouth opens and I spew out all of my fears. “Am I making the right decision marrying Joel? Because right now, I’m so confused. I don’t know what’s up and what’s down. I know I love him but is love enough? Nanna and Pop loved one another and even without words you could tell that. Can you tell that with Joel and me? I want an all-encompassing love like they had, and I don’t know if I have that, and if I’m marrying the man, shouldn’t I know what type of love we have?”

When I finish my word vomiting, Sab just sits here, blankly looking at me. Then, without a word, she jumps up and walks into the other room. I hear the flip of the lock and the sounds of the “Open” sign being turned off. Then she walks back into the room and behind the bar, where she grabs another bottle of wine. She returns, fills my glass to the top, and does the same to hers. Then she sits back down and stares at me.

“Why do I feel like I’m in trouble?”

“You’re not in trouble with me but I do think you’re in trouble. Rubes, you just dropped a massive-ass bomb on me, and I need time to process so I can best help you.” She takes a sip of her drink. “When did these doubts start?”

“I don’t know exactly, but last night, I dreamed about a faceless man who evoked feelings in me that I haven’t felt in a very long time, and when Joel kissed me earlier when he arrived, I felt nothing. Not even a tingle and then the soup thing happened, and now I’m doubting everything. ”

“Do you love him?” I nod because I do love him. She shakes her head. “No, I mean do you love-love him? Or are you in love with the idea of him as your husband?”

My glass is halfway to my mouth, and I pause as I process her words. “I … I love him.” Then I quietly tack on, “I think.” My eyes well with tears, and I look over at my best friend.

“Ohhh, Rubes.” She stands up and walks over to me. Dropping to her knees before me, she takes my wine from my hands and places it on the table next to hers. “Talk to me, why have you not said anything?”

All I can do is shrug because I don’t know. I don’t think I even realized Joel and I had fallen into a funk until today. “You know I’ve always been able to confide in you about everything”— well, almost everything— “but I honestly didn’t really think about it until just now. I’ve been stewing on it ever since, and I guess I didn’t want to voice it out loud because if I did, then it would be real, but we’re getting married soon?—”

“Do you want to marry Joel?”

My head begins to bob up and down, but then I stop and shrug. “I don’t know,” I whisper. “These last few months, it feels like he’s pulling away. I put it down to the stress of the wedding because I’m stressed too, but last night…” Shit, I have to stop myself because I can’t tell her seeing Maddox again after all these years brought up all the memories of us from all those years ago. This is why secrets are bad.

“Last night what?”

Looking at her, I decide to go with a half-truth. “You gave me that ornament and then Maddox knocked?—”

“You want my brother?”

Yes . “No, what I mean is, I made that wish and then not Joel appeared. If that thing is magical, shouldn’t my one true love have appeared?”

“We both know magic isn’t real. ”

“Magical love is all around us.” I wave my hand around my store.

“Books and real life never really match up, and as much as I would love to have you as my sister-in-law, you can do so much better than my brother. He’s”—she pauses and shudders—“my brother, but since we’re being honest, I don’t think Joel is the one for you either.” She titters. “It’s funny, when I got you that ornament, I didn’t expect anything to come of it, and I know I just said magic isn’t real, but maybe it’s subconsciously telling you Joel isn’t the one and your Mr. Forever is still out there.”

“Sab, I’m supposed to get married in sixteen days. Sixteen days. Everything is booked. My dress is hanging in my closet. The cater?—”

“Plans change,” she says, as if it’s that easy. She takes my hand in hers and squeezes. “Just think about what you really want. If it’s Joel, I will be there in sixteen days’ time at your side smiling brightly in my non-shitty bridesmaid dress, and if it’s not him, I will be in the driver’s seat ready to whisk you away.”

“You really are the best friend a girl could ask for.”

“You still think that after my gift has opened up a can of worms?”

“I think I would have felt like this regardless of your gift, but I’m happy to place blame on you to alleviate my stress.”

“And as your bestie, I’m happy to take said blame. Now, let's get out of here, we have a girls’ weekend to start, but do me a favor?” I nod. “Try not think about it this weekend. Have fun. Focus on you and then next week, focus on the bigger picture.”

“I’ll try,” I tell her. “Now, let’s do this.”

Together we clean up, making sure everything is tidy for Charlene tomorrow. I’m so thankful she’s here. If I had to deal with these thoughts by myself, I’d stress myself to death, but with my best friend by my side, I know I’ll be fine.