The Coast is Clear (Breakaway Shores #1)

Izzy

Paw Patrol

“Can we call Grandpa and Grandma?” Christian asked, holding two dinosaur figures. We were playing with their toys in Kingston’s room. I hadn’t showered yet. We’d had breakfast and spent the last hour building towers that they would knock down aggressively. I hadn’t slept well. I’d tossed and turned, thinking entirely too much about Zander. And then I felt stupid for caring so much about it and then spiraled even further. I’d thought about how we’d almost kissed and struggled with some guilt. Guilt about wanting to kiss him and then guilty because I didn’t think I should feel guilty about that.

“Sure, let’s call them,” I said, remembering that they hadn't answered the last time we called them. They hadn’t answered the time before that either.

But I didn’t want to say no; I didn’t want to be the one holding my kids back from knowing Jack’s parents. They were doing that well enough on their own. I grabbed my phone off the ground as Kingston stood, stacking Legos atop the tower. I called Jack’s mom and put the phone on speaker. It rang three times. Christian stared at the phone before it went to voicemail. He pressed the red button before I could ask if he wanted to leave a voicemail. “Mom, I miss Grandma and Grandpa.”

I pulled him into my lap, his arms wrapping around my neck. “I know, honey.”

“Why did they move away from us?” His voice was so small, so fragile.

I wanted to be careful with my words. “You might not remember your uncle, your dad’s brother, but he got married and had a baby. So, your grandma and grandpa wanted to be close in case they needed help.”

Christian didn’t say anything, but I held him anyway. I wished I could take away this part of losing Jack, of growing up without their dad. But I knew the best thing I could do was just be there for him. “Hey, should we see what Uncle Luke is doing today?”

Kingston rammed a stegosaurus into the Lego tower, making a loud roaring sound as he did it. Christian sat up, nodding, “Can we call him now?”

A knock sounded on the door as I sat the boys down for a snack. “Door, Mom!” Christian yelled, and it made the ache in my head even worse. I padded to the front door in my favorite sweatpants and black tank top. I pulled it open without even checking and found Luke and Zander standing side by side.

Luke held a white paper coffee cup, “Brought you a chai, dear sister.” He came inside and handed it off to me, brushing a kiss against my cheek.

“Thanks,” I muttered, moving to the side as Zander came in and copied my brother. Only Zander’s hand found my waist first before placing a kiss on my other cheek. It made my back stiffen, and I swore I could hear him chuckle.

“Boys, what are we doing today?” Luke was already in the dining room talking to Christian and Kingston.

“Snack time, Uncle Luke,” Kingston said with what sounded like a mouth full of food.

Luke nodded as I closed the door. After the night I had, I took a sip of the fragrant chai and felt grateful that my brother brought it. “Well, I got us movie tickets. Are you guys ready to see the new Paw Patrol movie?” Luke said, drumming his fingers on the table.

Christian dropped his carrot stick and looked at me. “Mom?”

I knew nothing about Luke’s plans, but I knew that the boys wanted to see the movie. “It sounds like an Uncle Luke day.”

Christian squealed, standing up in his chair. Kingston had a mouth full of cheese and didn’t seem to be paying attention. Zander went to the kitchen, pulled out a water bottle, and Luke walked over to me, smiling. “I hope that’s okay. Figured you could use a few hours break.”

“Thank you, Luke. I didn’t sleep well at all last night.”

He nodded and then shooed me away. “Go, I’ve got this. Movie is in an hour, and I’ll text you when I’m done.”

I stepped backward and caught Zander’s eye. “I didn’t take you for a Paw Patrol fan.”

“I’m definitely not. I wanted to show you something at the house, actually,” he said, raising his eyebrows.

Luke looked at me, “You better go before they realize you’re not coming with us.”

My boys weren’t clingy and didn’t have significant separation issues, but Kingston could be challenging at times. I couldn’t blame Luke for not wanting to deal with a meltdown right now. “Going, going.”

Zander followed me out of the kitchen and trailed me as I went up the stairs. I stopped, and he froze on the step right below me, his body almost touching mine. “I need to change quickly.”

He nodded and stayed where he was as I went to change. I didn’t want him to think I was trying to impress him, so I pulled on my favorite pair of boyfriend jeans and an oversized t-shirt. It was my mom uniform and did not scream date me in any way. That’s exactly what I needed right now. He was waiting right near the door when I came back down, and I could hear Luke and the boys still in the dining room. Zander and I snuck out, grabbing my small purse on the way out. “I told your brother I needed to show you something at the house, but I just really didn’t want to go to that movie. I figured I could keep you company instead.”

“I don’t want to make you regret your choice, but the Paw Patrol movies are well done. I may or may not have cried at the first one,” I said as we walked down the street toward his house just a few blocks away.

Zander turned on a dime and started to walk back toward the house. I caught his hand, and we both laughed. I could feel the calluses on the inside of his fingers, and he squeezed my hand, smiling at me as he turned back around. I let go of him, unsure why I was still allowing myself to do this. It wasn’t smart.

We walked close together, our arms brushing against each other. “Want to walk on the beach first?”

I craved the freshness of the ocean air, hoping it would help me keep my head on straight. “Yes, let’s.”