The Coast is Clear (Breakaway Shores #1)

Izzy

Date Night

I came downstairs to Christian and Zander, whispering on the couch. Kingston was sitting on the floor, rummaging through his backpack. There was another backpack at Christian’s feet. “What do we have here?”

Zander and Christian jumped, and Christian let out a giggle. “We’re going on a sleepover to Uncle Luke’s!”

My stomach twisted, and I gave Zander a face. The front door popped open, and Luke walked in with his arms wide. “You boys ready?” They both attacked his legs, wrapping their arms around him like crabs. He pretended to be stuck, unable to walk.

“Hey,” Zander said, crossing the room and coming to hold my hand. “This is a surprise and I figured then you’d have less anxiety about it. We’re going on a date of the overnight persuasion.”

I widened my eyes and felt the rush of excitement and a boil of anxiety. I hadn’t been away from Kingston, ever. We’d spent every day of his life together and never been separated overnight. Jack and I had been on a couple overnight trips away from Christian, but since he died, they’d been my buddies. But Zander had probably guessed that. He was being sweet, and I needed not to be upset by this sudden change in plans. It was going to be fine. They were safe with Luke, and I was going to get some much-needed alone time with Zander. It was going to be okay.

“Thank you,” I said back to him after a very long pause and squeezed his hand back.

He kissed the side of my face and turned to the boys. “You gotta give your mom some love. Say, ‘See you tomorrow!’”

The boys detached themselves from their uncle and rushed over to me, giving me quick side hugs and mimicking Zander’s see you tomorrow. Luke shot me a smile as he led the boys out the door. And then, they were gone. A panic began to erupt in my chest, and I wanted them to come back. I wanted them to come back so I could know where they were, that they were safe.

But it was okay, I tried to remind myself. They were just with Luke, and he wouldn’t let anything happen to them. Zander came over, pushing a piece of hair behind my ear. “Do you need a minute? Because we need to head out in about thirty minutes.”

I was taken aback. “Leave where?”

“It’s a surprise, . Can you indulge me?”

I nodded, reminding myself again that this was okay. It was going to be just fine, maybe even a ton of fun if I could let myself relax. “I’ll go pack a bag.”

Zander kissed me softly on the lips and I could see how excited he was.

We were in Portland, and I hadn’t been to Portland in years. Since before having the boys. It was different than I remembered, a little grungier. I had my hand wrapped around Zander’s bicep as we walked down 23rd. It was a cute street, full of little shops and restaurants—a must-see on the list of things to do in Portland. “Luke just texted,” Zander said, pocketing his phone, “The boys are doing wonderful. Very happy campers.”

I loved how much he tried to reassure me that everything was okay. “I’m glad. Now, where are we off to?”

Zander put his hand on top of mine, squeezing my fingers. “We are going to get some dinner. Have you ever been to Papa Hyden?”

Had I ever. “Yes, definitely.”

“Perfect. It’s one of my favorites.” There was a bit of a line coming out of the very poorly planned doorway, but apparently, we had reservations. A young woman dressed entirely in black led us to a tiny circular table in the corner. There was a single candle lit on the table.

The restaurant was busy tonight. There were families around bigger tables and couples surrounding us. That’s what we were, a couple. “So, how did you end up in Portland? I don’t think I’ve ever asked that.”

Zander sat his menu down on the table softly. “Well, I guess it’s kind of an embarrassing answer. Natalie, my ex, had family here and we came to visit once. It was early on in our relationship, but I remember loving the quaintness of the city and the coast, of course. It was stormy that day, and I just thought it was incredibly cozy.”

“That’s not embarrassing. She introduced you to this part of the Pacific Northwest, so that’s something positive.” I knew exactly what I was going to have, so I folded my hands over the large menu.

“If you say so.”

It felt like as good a time as any to get deeper into the ex-girlfriend conversation. “What happened with Natalie?”

Zander pursed his lips as the waiter came to the table. He took our drink orders, and then Zander cleared his throat, “She was…a lot. And I don’t say that in the way some people do about women where it’s a dig. Natalie was loud, always full of energy, and just wanted to do what she wanted to do. She didn’t much care for what I wanted to do a lot of the time, and we just wanted di fferent things.”

“Did you end things, or did she?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. We had a huge fight. She was angry at me for not wanting to go on this ridiculous trip with her and her friends. She was packing in the closet and started throwing stuff at me: clothes, shoes, her bags. I feel like I’ve blocked out most of what she was saying to me, but it wasn’t great. I told her I was done and packed a bag, and left. She went on her trip, and when she was gone, I moved out. That was it, really.”

His eyebrows were furrowed, and his eyes flickered down to the flame between us. “That does sound like a lot.”

“Yeah,” Zander shook his head. “Did you and Jack ever fight?”

I leaned back in my chair, trying to remember. I feel like I’d memorialized our relationship. Everything turned rosy because of what had happened to him. “We fought like people fight. Jack was very sarcastic, too sarcastic, and it was hard for me. Jack was a little more traditional discipline-wise, so sometimes we disagreed on how to handle things with Christian. Jack was very into his hobbies, and I remember struggling with that as a new mom who had no freedom to do anything.” I paused for a moment and knew that it hadn’t been perfect. We’d had our hard times, but it all seemed unimportant now. “We did, yeah.But normal fighting, I think. We didn’t fight like my parents did when they were married. ”

“What do you mean?” Zander asked simply, placing his folded hands on his menu.

“They fought a lot, like screaming matches, but most of the screaming was my mother. I just remember playing with Luke in his room at the furthest end of the house to try and not hear their argument. It was… well, I don’t know. To this day, I get anxious in a serious way when confrontation comes my way. Jack knew that and so I think we both tried to work things out before it got to that point.” I smiled weakly, hoping that that wasn’t too much to share.

Zander nodded, and the waiter came back to our table. I ordered a chicken sandwich and a slice of cake. You couldn’t go wrong with any of their desserts. Zander got a burger and another piece of cake. The waiter left, and Zander reached his hand out for mine. His skin was warm, and his fingers were rough in places, but I liked the way it felt. “I hate fighting, for the record. But I will say that I struggle sometimes to say what I’m feeling.” He smiled and then squeezed my hand. “Just so you know.”

“That’s good to know. What I’m feeling is usually written all over my face. I’m bad at hiding my emotions.”

“I’ve figured that much out,” Zander chuckled.

The food was delicious, and we opted to finish the cake over our main dishes. It was the right choice. The night air was chilled when we walked outside, and I slipped my arm through Zander’s. He glanced at me before saying, “Okay, so the next stop is one that I think you’ll really like, but it’s about a mile walk. Want me to call a car or just go for a stroll?”

“Stroll.”