The Coast is Clear (Breakaway Shores #1)

Izzy

Brother

His face was basically one big bruise, and that was just one part of what made me sick to look at him. The nurse had stayed behind in my room with the boys, claiming to have something special for them to play with. I didn’t think our visit to Luke would be very long, and I didn’t think too much could be harmful to them with a nurse around. Zander had told me she’d been with us the entire time.

But Luke looked terrible. His face was bruised, a big angry cut at his hairline was stitched together, and there were tubes coming out from all around him. His arm had them, and there was a big white tube coming out of his mouth. Apparently, he hadn’t been breathing well when the ambulance had brought him in.

I held his hand, reaching up from my wheelchair that they’d insisted I use. Zander was behind me, his eyes on the ground. The doctor was standing outside after giving me a very balanced speech about Luke. Balanced in the fact that it was equally grim and encouraging. He had swelling in his brain and stress to his lungs, but he was improving. They thought the swelling was going down, and he guessed that within the week, he’d wake up.

But he didn’t know for sure.

My big brother was lying so helpless in front of me. And I couldn’t stop myself from picturing Jack in his place. Jack had never made it to the hospital, though. He’d died almost instantly. That’s what they told me. But he had probably been banged up, bruised, broken.

It hurt my heart to see my brother lying here just like that. “I should have noticed the truck,” I whispered, almost to myself.

Zander’s hand found my neck, running his fingers over my skin. “Don’t blame yourself. It could have happened to me or Luke, too. It’s not your fault.”

I squeezed Luke’s fingers and then set them back down on top of his brown hospital blanket. “Let’s get back to the boys.”

We didn’t speak as he wheeled me back to my room. The doctor had told me that I had a concussion, and they weren’t sure why I had been unconscious for so long. But they weren’t too concerned. All their tests showed nothing abnormal. I was going to stay one more night and then be released tomorrow.

Zander brought me back to his house, telling me that in a week, it would be mine anyway. I didn’t complain, especially since the boys had been staying there with Zander’s mom.

She was out in the backyard when we came home. I was walking slowly, if only because I felt a bit weak after being in bed for a few days. “Hey, Mom, we’re here,” Zander called out through the open French doors.

She stood up out of the chair on the porch with a book in her hand. Her eyes matched his. Her hair was brown but with silvery shimmers. She had a soft smile on her face, and she stood. Zander wrapped her up in a hug. She stood almost a foot shorter than him.

“This is ,” Zander said as he pulled away, his face blank.It felt strange to be meeting her under this circumstance, with my hospital ID band still on my wrist when she’d been watching over my children for the last few days. “And , this is my mom, LeAnn.”

LeAnn’s face lit up, and she held out both hands for me. I grabbed onto them, and she moved me over to the chair. “Come sit with me while Zander makes us something to eat.” She threw a look at Zander, who shook his head with a laugh.

Christian and Kingston were playing in the dirt, which, by the looks of the big plastic mixing bowls they had next to them, was probably more mud than anything else. They hadn’t noticed me yet, and that was okay. “You’ve got two great boys there.”

“Thank you for watching over them,” I told her, twisting so I could see her better.

She rested her hands on her stomach. “It was my pleasure. They’re so busy, and it's such a fun age. I remember when Zander and his brother were that little. I thought I was going to drown, like I’d never have a free moment again. Now, I wish I could go back and be with them just for one more day when they were that small.”

“I wish I could go back to when Kingston was small. I barely remember that first year. I would go back and just hold him, let him nap on me.” My chest burned as I admitted that out loud. It was something that ran through my head regularly, but I hadn’t told anyone.

LeAnn nodded. “Did Zander tell you that my husband died when he was a child?”

“He did.”

“When my husband died, my whole world fell apart. Zander’s older brother, William, was older. But he didn’t handle it well. Zander was young enough that we were able to adjust and work together to move forward. But after a number of years, I met someone. He was kind and caring. He loved Zander like my husband would have wanted. But I remember being terrified. I’d lay in bed, and all these horrible scenarios would fill my mind. Him dying in every way and my world imploding all over again.” I knew the feeling. I’d had the same anxious thoughts about Zander. The ones that led to my freakout when we were camping. “I might be speaking out of turn, but it’s okay to be scared of losing him. You just have to decide if you want to push through the fear and enjoy whatever time you get or let it control you.”

I wiped away a tear that fell down my cheek. “He told you I tried to end things?” LeAnn nodded again.

“I don’t blame you. I remember doing something very similar with the first man I loved after my late husband.”

“I don’t know a lot of other widows.”

LeAnn smiled, “It’s quite the club to be a part of.”

Zander came out from the kitchen, and I couldn’t meet his eyes, wondering if he’d heard every word his mom said. He handed me a small blue bowl with some delicious-smelling soup inside.

I cleared my throat, “What brought you over to this coast, LeAnn?”

She smiled and blew over her hot soup, looking over at Zander, who was leaning on the railing of the deck. “Well, this one told me he bought me a house. And I knew that I needed to come say thank you in person. A little voice in my head told me to get on a plane that day, and I did. Here I am.”

“Thank goodness you were here,” I said, taking a small spoonful of my soup. It was delicious, with some warm spices inside.

Christian noticed me and threw his hands in the air. “Mommy! You’re back. ”

I waved at him and loved that he instantly sat back down, getting back to his game.

LeAnn stood. “I’m going to eat my soup inside. Give you two time together.”

I smiled at her as she walked back into the house. Zander took her chair, and I couldn’t help but take him in. Even with some dark bags under his eyes, he was ridiculously handsome.

I placed the bowl in my lap and cleared my throat. “I freaked out. All I could think about was how you were leaving at the end of the summer. Because we had made these plans, plans that would only happen if you stayed, but I just… We spent every day together, and the boys love you. I was terrified that you’d leave, sick of your fun fling with a widow, and then I’d be left trying to put together those pieces. But I think I made myself more scared about it to justify my choice. You’re not that guy; you’re not the guy who just leaves. I know that, and I’m sorry that I painted you that way. I love you, Zander, and I haven’t felt like that for anyone since Jack. It’s terrifying, but I want to try. I want to push past the fear and make this work. I don’t care if you take that job and have to travel a couple nights for work. I want you to do what you love and be with us on the other days.”

Zander watched me, not moving. I was frozen, afraid that I’d already ruined it. He leaned over the side of the chair and smiled, brushing my hair behind my ear. “I love you, too. And I love Christian, and I love Kingston. In a weird way, I even love Jack for everything he gave the three of you.”

My heart swelled, and I pressed my lips to his. It was soft sweet, and it made everything inside me warm. “Look, they’re kissing!” Kingston yelled from across the backyard.

It was all going to be okay.