The Cowboy and the Hacker (Farthingdale Valley #5)

30. Zeke

Chapter 30

Zeke

Z eke could feel the sweat all over his body as it cooled, sending shivers down his spine. He sat on a boulder at the edge of the gravel parking lot. As he rubbed his left thigh, he remembered this was the exact same boulder he’d sat on to wait for Cal to arrive in the white prison van.

The memory was made even better when Cal followed him into the shade and stood there for a moment, hesitating as if asking for permission to come closer. Not because he was afraid of Zeke, Zeke knew that. But because he was giving Zeke the choice. And he would wait forever, it seemed, as long as Zeke needed it.

The inside of Zeke’s palm felt bruised from gripping the rifle so tightly. His shoulder felt worn and sore from where he’d braced the butt of the rifle.

He knew enough about rifles to scare away wild animals from livestock, to scare off bears from a herd of mustangs. To protect Cal. But he’d never pointed a weapon at a man before. Never felt the impulse to hurt another human being like that.

But Preston had been hurting Cal . The bruises around Cal’s neck, as Zeke looked up at him, were darkening as he watched.

Nobody deserved to be treated that way, especially not Cal, and all over again Zeke felt the rage rise up in his heart, taking him over so fast, he felt like he was turning into a dark version of himself. A horrible version when he wanted to be the best version of himself—for Cal.

There was only one solution. He reached out and drew Cal close, wrapped his arms around Cal’s slender waist, and buried his face against Cal’s belly.

“I’m not a violent man,” he whispered.

The words weren’t loud, but Cal must have heard him because he cradled Zeke’s head against him, and leaned to kiss the top of his head.

Maybe there were people watching and maybe there weren’t. Zeke didn’t care either way, not when he felt the sweep of absolution moving through him.

“You’re not,” said Cal. “But you were protecting me. Nobody’s ever done that before.”

“I could have done it without the rifle,” Zeke ground out.

What an idiot he was. Anger had taken over, and that was so unlike him. But perhaps the strong feeling went along with other, even more powerful feelings, unlike those he’d felt when he’d been with Betty Lou. What he felt for Cal was different, and engaged all of him, his body, his passion, and his rage.

“Maybe,” said Cal. He held Zeke even tighter before letting him go to tip Zeke’s chin up in his fingers. “But nobody got hurt. We’re both here.”

As Zeke looked around him, he realized they were alone in the shade next to the parking lot. Everything felt still and quiet, almost peaceful. As if Zeke hadn’t almost become a murderer only seconds before.

He didn’t imagine that Galen was going to run to Gabe or even Leland and tell them all about it. That responsibility lay with Zeke, and Zeke alone. As for now, he needed to make sure of Cal.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his hands going to Cal’s hips as he looked up at him. “He went at you pretty hard.”

“Nothing I’m not used to,” said Cal in a flippant way.

The words were like a stab to Zeke’s heart. Nobody should accept such treatment as normal.

At least Zeke was there to make sure Cal would never be subjected to that kind of brutality again. And just as he would with a young, abused horse, he stood up slowly and held Cal against him.

“I’ll take care of whoever needs to hear what happened,” said Cal. “Gabe. And maybe Leland, too.”

“We’ll go together,” said Zeke, feeling fierce about this. “You’re not on your own now. But I need to know what happened.”

“Because I went to prison?” asked Cal, sounding like he was worried that his time behind bars would be a reason for Zeke to reject him.

“I know why you went,” said Zeke, tightening his hands on Cal’s hips, but gently. “To get away. I guess I never understood—” He paused, thinking this over before he spoke it out loud. “I never understood why you would steal from Mr. Simms, who’d done nothing but work hard all his life for money he needs in his old age.”

To his surprise, Cal smiled, and moved between Zeke’s thighs, and laced his hands around Zeke’s neck, resting on his shoulders. Zeke looked up at him and waited.

“He never lost a dime,” said Cal. “I took money out of his account and routed it to nowhere. Even if the money had gone somewhere, it was insured, and Mr. Simms wouldn’t lose any of it. I purposefully made a mess out of the theft, so the FBI could spot it right away. They arrested me inside of a week. It was all a ploy. I never wanted to steal from him, but Preston was at me and at me.” Cal sighed and hung his head. “I caved, but I was at the end of my rope. After all my other attempts, I didn’t know what else to do, so I got myself arrested.”

“I guess I can understand that,” said Zeke slowly, leaning back to feel the pressure of Cal’s hands on his neck. “Now that I’ve met him, at least.”

“Hopefully, you’ll never have to meet him again.”

Zeke considered this as he lifted his chin, an invitation for a kiss.

They would have to be witnesses and maybe appear in court. They certainly needed to explain to Gabe and Leland what happened, and that needed to happen before anything else did. He valued the standing he had in those men’s eyes, and he was proud of his reputation as a hard working man.

“We need to get this over with.” Zeke stood up and clasped Cal’s hands in his, as a deterrent to what he really wanted to do, which was to pull Cal into the quiet shadows and kiss him hard, kiss him good. Make it plain how he felt. “I reckon it won’t get any easier.”

Cal smiled at him and rose on his toes to kiss him on the mouth. And Zeke sighed. Who knew that kissing another man—that kissing Cal—would be so simple, yet so amazing?

Gabe came out of the shadows of the woods, with Galen at his side, and who knew where Galen’s team was except that they were probably obediently at work, in spite of having no supervision. But that was Galen’s gift.

Gabe’s gift was to listen to Zeke explain the events of the morning, how Preston had abused Cal, and kept coming around even though he’d been told to stay away. Beneath those words was Zeke’s desire to put this behind him, and quickly so he and Cal could build their future together.

“What about the rifle?” asked Gabe, his voice level.

“It was pure impulse on my part,” said Zeke. “When I heard Preston had come by to harass Cal again, I grabbed it from my tent. It was beneath my cot.”

“What was it doing under your cot?” asked Gabe. “It should have been stored properly in a locker in the supply hut.”

Zeke felt the sweat ring his neck all over again. “I’d cleaned it and meant to take it back.” He said. “I forgot it was there until Preston showed up and then?—”

He had to stop. Gabe knew what happened, but as the vision of it raced through him, Zeke knew there was no excuse for behaving like a man with no thought to the consequences.

“He only meant to scare Preston off,” said Cal, his voice rising. “Like he’d done with the bears.”

“Is that true?” asked Gabe.

The silence that filled the air around him brought Zeke to a halt. All of this rested on his shoulders.

“I can’t rightly say,” Zeke said, reaching for the truth beneath what he’d done. “I’ve never killed a man and I don’t think I intended to today. I was only going to shoot off his kneecap?—”

“Only one?” asked Galen, half a laugh lacing through his words.

“Just to scare him.”

“That’s what I told Leland when he called me.” Gabe looked Cal over. “I also told him that we have the right to defend ourselves and those that are in our care. He agreed, but I think he will want to talk with you, just the same.”

“I’m willing.” Zeke straightened his spine. “Do you think he means to let me go? Ask me to leave?”

“No.” Gabe’s answer came quickly, as if this conversation had already occurred between him and Leland. “You were defending Cal’s rights, just the same as you would have done for anyone.”

“What happens now?” asked Cal.

Zeke could tell Cal was getting wound up, anxiety taking over like a bad habit kicking in. He reached out to place his palm alongside Cal’s arm, and he left it there.

“You get back to work after you patch yourselves up,” said Gabe. “At the end of the day, take a truck up to the ranch, and have that face-to-face with Leland. But like I said, he’s already on your side. He just wants to get the details.”

“I can do that,” said Zeke.

“ We can do that,” said Cal. He whooshed out a breath. “I could have tried harder to stop him, to make him go away, but I didn’t.”

“Nobody should have to handle that man on their own.” Zeke knew for a fact that if Cal ever had to talk to Preston again, Zeke would be there for it. Then he said to Gabe, “We should get back to work.”

“Go take care of those bruises first,” said Gabe. “Work will wait.”

“Yes, sir,” said Zeke, grateful that he’d get a bit of a break so he could make sure Cal was okay, really okay.

As Gabe and Galen took the path that led toward the main part of the compound, Zeke curled his fingers around Cal’s hand and pulled him close.

“We’ll get some ice for those,” he said.

“I’m fine,” said Cal.

“Ice,” said Zeke firmly. “Ice and Tylenol. And ice cream.”

“I’d rather have Bugles and a Coke,” said Cal, because, as it was easy to see, he remembered, as did Zeke, one of their first conversations. How they both preferred the savory to the sweet.

He took Cal to the first aid hut and applied an ice pack while Cal downed the Tylenol. Hopefully, this would be the last time he’d be patching Cal up after an encounter with Preston.

As Zeke trailed his fingers over Cal’s neck, he followed the touch with kisses. He knew he couldn’t kiss those bruises away, but hopefully, the kisses would remind Cal that he was safe now and that Zeke would do anything in the world to protect him.

Cal leaned into the kisses and asked, suddenly pulling the ice pack away, “Are there more bullets in your tent?”

“More bullets?” asked Zeke, puzzled.

“In your tent,” said Cal, firmly, and maybe a bit loudly.

Without another word, Cal hopped down from the exam table and led Zeke out of the first aid hut, carefully and quietly closing the door behind him. Then he led Zeke along the path, past the mess tent, and down the road of team leads’ tents.

“What’re we doing?” asked Zeke, though the way Cal dragged him up the wooden steps to his tent might have given him a clue if he wasn’t so lunkheaded about all of this.

“You can guess,” said Cal as he zipped the tent flap closed and began tugging Zeke’s shirt from his jeans.

“You should rest.” Zeke took Cal's hands in his, clasping them to his chest, drawing Cal close. “You should.”

“Later.” Cal breathed a kiss against Zeke’s mouth, making Zeke’s blood quicken, tension dropping away from him. “Later. For now, this.”

This. Cal unbuttoning Zeke’s shirt with careful fingers. Cal drawing the shirt away and kissing the breadth of Zeke’s chest. It was mid-day. Zeke wasn’t a prude, but it was mid-day.

“Don’t worry about anything now.”

Cal took off his own shirt, and led the way as both of them took all of their clothes off and stood hip to hip in the tent as the sun warmed the green canvas, bringing with it the scent of pine trees and soft, water-scented air.

Everything slowed down to an easy pace as Cal pulled him to the cot and they tugged a single white cotton sheet over them both. Zeke leaned on his elbow and let the moment soak into them.

“A dalliance in the middle of the morning is not exactly in the guidelines,” said Zeke, quietly and a little playfully as he curled his fingers around the back of Cal’s neck.

“I need this.” Cal sounded a little desperate, still a little shook, so Zeke tugged him close and kissed him until his breathing evened out and he settled in Zeke’s arms, and they were chest to chest, naked against each other.

“Tell me what you need.”

“You,” said Cal without a moment’s hesitation. “Just this. Just you.”

Nobody had ever wanted Zeke the way Cal did. He didn’t expect Zeke to be anything other than what he was, it seemed, and this idea wound through him, easy and sweet. To be so wanted. So loved.

Yes, that was the word, and he knew it would be right to say it out loud, but it was still hard. He’d only said it to Betty Lou when the occasion warranted it, when she seemed to expect it. And looking back, that seemed a short-minded way to treat someone he’d been intending to marry.

“I love you, Cal,” he said before he could stop himself.

He kissed Cal on the forehead, and then on the nose, and cheek, and then his lovely mouth. Taking his time, expressing everything he felt in every touch, every place his hands touched Cal.

“I’ve felt it for a while, but didn’t quite know how to go about saying it.”

“You’re saying it now.” Cal’s smile was sweet, his blue eyes focused on Zeke, a flush rising in his cheeks. “I know it’s not easy to say. But I can say it to you. I love you, Zeke Molloy. You make me feel safe.”

Zeke smiled at this. “I aim to make you feel more than safe, Callahan Tamalin.”

Cal’s small gasp of pleasure was unexpected, as was his flinging his arms around Zeke’s neck, and almost making them bang foreheads. With a laugh, he let Zeke go and kissed him hard.

“You can aim to do anything you want with me,” said Cal, stroking his fingers along Zeke’s chest. “Anything at all.”

“One day,” said Zeke, gathering up his courage. “We might go all the way, you know. Like men and women do?—”

“We might,” said Cal with a smile, as if he meant to tease, but then he ducked his chin and looked up at Zeke, sweetly, through his lashes. “When we’re ready.”

He sounded so wise, like he’d experienced everything the world had to offer, but only wanted what Zeke wanted to give him.

What Zeke wanted to give him was everything in the world he’d ever wanted. For now, he would do what he could to make Cal feel loved.

So he pushed the sheet aside and eased down between Cal’s legs and took Cal’s cock in his mouth and let it sit there, warm and still.

He could feel the blood pulsing on his tongue as Cal grew hard, taste the salt, and heard Cal gasp as he arched his head back into the pillow.

The last time he’d done this, given Cal a blow job, it had all felt so new, even foreign. Strange to feel so, when he’d gotten any number of blow jobs in his time, good, average, sloppy, even hurried.

For Cal, though, he could easily push past the strangeness, and do to Cal what he himself enjoyed. Soft strokes, gentle licks. A bit of hard sucking followed by soft.

Cal tasted good, salt and sweet at the same time, the feel of Cal’s cock luxurious beneath his tongue. When Cal began to tremble, his body tightening, Zeke looped his arm around Cal’s hips to hold him still so Zeke could focus on bringing Cal right to the edge of pleasure and then over it.

This time, when Cal came, he swallowed and smiled as Cal groaned. He let Cal slip from his mouth and wiping his own mouth with the back of his hand as he sat up, propped on one hand so he could look at Cal, open-mouthed, head tossed back on the pillow as he relaxed and sighed. Then he smiled up at Zeke.

“Well?” asked Zeke. “How’d I do?”

“You need a lot of practice,” said Cal, and just as Zeke opened his mouth to defend himself, Cal smiled and tugged Zeke on top of him. “Lots and lots and lots.”

“I reckon I can manage that,” said Zeke. He balanced himself on both elbows, like any gentleman would, and kissed Cal soundly anywhere he could reach. “If you don’t mind me being fumble-handed about it—I’m just not used to being gay.”

“Easy now,” said Cal. He placed his hands on Zeke’s shoulders. “It’s not a competition. You can’t compare. Remember what I said? Everybody’s different. With you, I’m different, that’s for sure.”

“What do you mean?” Zeke wanted to know, but his leg started to cramp up, so he slid down until his head was on the pillow beside Cal’s head, and he could lay his hand across Cal’s middle, and ease into a more relaxed state.

“With you, I don’t feel so afraid.” Cal pulled Zeke’s hand up to kiss his palm, tugged on Zeke’s bear scare, then laid Zeke’s hand back down like a protective ward against all the dangers in the world. “With you, I feel brave. With you. Well, everything is possible. Hope that makes sense.”

“I think it does.” Zeke knew that was the truth.

Before Cal, Zeke had felt aimless, wavering between wanting to stay in motion and wanting to settle down. He had been going to settle down with Betty Lou, but that dream was broken up along with his leg. Now there was another option.

Now there was Cal. Cal and everything that he brought with him, his unhappy past, and his unwavering faith in Zeke, and the life they would build together. And they would.

“When the summer is over,” said Zeke. “When you’ve got your certificate—” He stopped, feeling a little overwhelmed by the idea of a life with Cal. Overwhelmed by how sweet it would be. “What do you reckon you and I go down to New Mexico?”

“New Mexico?”

“There’s an old family farm there, a ranch, really.” Zeke pulled Cal close until he was half on top of Zeke, resting easily in the curve of Zeke’s arms. “My grandmother used to raise mules. We could, too. Raise them and train them. I thought about how a pack mule would have been so useful on our trip to Aungaupi Valley.”

“But what about Dusty?”

“He was fine.” Zeke nodded to make sure Cal knew he truly believed this. “But he wasn’t trained for carrying a load like that. Mules are smart. They’re sassy and funny and so darn strong. Anyway.” He stopped and bent his head to touch it to Cal’s. “Something to think about. When the summer’s over.”

“That sounds good,” said Cal. “To me. Anywhere with you sounds good.”

Zeke bowed his head, overwhelmed by the tender words, the promise in them.

This was how love was supposed to feel, only he’d never known it until now. And now that he knew, truly knew, how it felt, he would do everything in his power to make sure Cal felt loved in return.

“Now,” said Cal, in a slightly bossy way that Zeke was growing to love. “Put your head right here and close your eyes for ten minutes. Then we’ll get to work, like I know you want to.”

Here was the curve along Cal’s neck, where Zeke nestled right beneath Cal’s jaw. A warm place. Sweet and soft and still, with Cal’s arm around him, the white cotton sheet fluttering down. Keeping him warm as his body cooled.

“Rest now.”

Cal’s fingers swirled around the curve of Zeke’s shoulder, reminding him that he was supposed to relax.

Later would come everything else. The difficult conversation with Leland. The hard work that would fill the rest of the summer.

For now he had this, Cal, satisfied and safe, the pain in his leg lowered to a vague dullness that would be dealt with later. The soft breeze that came from beneath the tent flaps. The scent of pine. The drowsy satisfaction. And the light kiss on his temple from Cal.

He had all the blessings he’d never thought he deserved. Until now.