The Dance We Remember (Love and Other Dreams #4)

Chapter 25

Aurora

Dim veils of mist lay over the city. The exhaust fumes from the rushing cars pollute the air. Clutching my yoga bag tightly, I stroll along the street. Like many of the people coming my way, I bury my face in my woolen scarf. It would have been better to put on gloves, but my bare fingers are exposed to the damp cold as I reach into my pocket to dial Vico's number.

We last spoke on the phone about three months ago when I moved here. I tried to reach him only once, but he neither picked up nor called back. I'm sure he's as busy as I am. However, I have ten minutes before my yoga class, and I want to use this time.

It rings.

I maneuver through a group of businessmen engaged in animated discussion.

He doesn't pick up.

Once again.

Thoughtfully, I gaze at the city lights. I'm starting to worry. Is something wrong with him?

"Hey," my brother says. "Sorry for not calling back. It's been so hectic here."

I grunt in agreement. "Yeah, here too. But tell me about yourself first."

"I finally found a coach, Matteo. He trains the biggest names in the scene," he shares with excitement. I can envision his eyes gleaming and his cheeks glowing.

"That's fantastic," I reply with equal enthusiasm. Seeing him so happy is not something to be taken for granted. He has always tried not to show me how much our mother's death affected him. But I know. Among all of us, he lost his footing the most.

"Next spring, I can participate in my first competitions." His voice overflows with excitement. He's always loved adrenaline, but now, diving from the highest cliffs of Italy, that's something new.

My brother continues chattering cheerfully. He talks about his training schedule, the camper he bought, and the joy of freedom that comes with his new life.

Vico is so full of enthusiasm that it almost seems exaggerated. The longer I listen, the stronger the feeling that his euphoria is just a cover-up for something he doesn't want me to see.

"And what's going on with you?" he suddenly asks after his monologue, catching me off guard with his question.

"Just on my way to yoga." Actually, that's the least important thing to report. "Training is going great; next week, we'll be dancing at the French Championships," I quickly add, feeling my heartbeat quicken.

"So you have a new dance partner?" he asks.

Now would be a good moment to tell Vico about the significant changes in my life. Instead, I mumble in agreement.

When I share the news of my pregnancy with my family, I should look them in the eyes. It's too important to discuss over the phone. "I'll be coming home for Christmas. Will you be there too?" I ask in a deliberately casual tone. He doesn't answer. I take the phone away from my ear to check the display for technical issues. Everything seems normal; he should still be on the line. "Vico?"

"Um...," he clears his throat extensively. "I can't."

"Why?" Christmas is one of the most important holidays. The whole family celebrates together.

The whole family. My chest tightens on the spot. It reminds me once again that it will never be the same. The whole family doesn't exist anymore.

Tears well up inside me. Oh God, not again.

"Well, Matteo suggested that we, uh, that we train in the Azores." Even though I can't see him, I just know that he's nervously rubbing his hand against his jeans. "We'll fly on the twentieth of December and won't return to Italy until early January."

This can't be serious. I stop and lean against the cold wall of a residential building. My nose starts to swell. "But we were supposed to..."

Saying goodbye to him was difficult. The thought of seeing each other again at Christmas was comforting. And now, he doesn't even want to come home at all?

"What's really going on?" I continue, still fighting back tears. There's something, I know it.

"Nothing. Cliff diving is just essential, Aurora. My future depends on me focusing on training right now," he urgently assures me. "I don't need to explain this to you, surely. You know how competitive sports work."

Of course, I do. Yet I feel the disappointment of his refusal all over me.

"If you don't come, you'll miss something incredibly important," I announce the big revelation. The joyous celebration of the miraculous wonder growing inside me, the one that will turn my life upside down—hopefully in the best way possible.

Unconsciously, I place my hand on my lower abdomen. Perhaps I'm still grappling with it, but I feel how significant what's happening to me right now truly is.

Maxime and I are going to be parents.

"Next year, I'll be there. I promise," he replies with finality. There's more firmness in his tone than I'm used to, and suddenly, I'm certain that something is wrong with him.

"Listen..." I say, wanting to put my concerns into words.

"I have to go," he says before I can speak further. "We'll talk soon."

I don't have enough time to respond; he ends the call immediately.

What was that?

Lost in thought, I push myself away from the house wall. I'm almost late now, so I hurry. I slip through the entrance door of the studio, where some participants of today's Yin Yoga session are engaged in animated conversations. I spot Sky by the coatrack.

She waves and smiles, taking my yoga bag from me. "Finally! I was afraid you wouldn't make it."

The door to the studio opens, and the participants flow into the room.

"Sorry, I was on the phone with Vico and lost track of time." I quickly take off my jacket and hang it on the crowded coatrack.

Sky unpacks my yoga mat and the two yoga blocks. "Alright, shoes off, and let's get started."

"Yes, ma'am," I reply with a grin. Here, outside the academy, with Sky by my side, I feel wonderfully carefree. No one looks at me judgmentally, and no one blames me for anything.

I know exactly whom I have to thank for that.

She must know. Before Sky turns away, I hold her back.

"You're the best friend anyone could wish for," I tell her, as this is long overdue.

Not only because she found this new yoga studio for us, so we won't risk running into anyone from the academy. But also because she's there for me in every situation. Although I'm looking forward to my life with Maxime, it pains me tremendously that I'll be moving out after the French Championship.

As if she knows what's going on in my mind, she briefly pulls me into a hug. "Won't you reconsider? My offer still stands."

No one is more generous than Sky. As fantastic as her suggestion is, I can't accept it. "If Maxime moves in with us, we'd intrude on you." I nod significantly toward my belly. "Besides, we'll soon be three."

It just wouldn't work. We can't live with her.

"I know." She snorts, throwing her arms up. "It's just that I'll miss you terribly."

"We'll stay friends. Nothing can change that." Besides, it's only a thirty-minute walk between our apartments.

For a moment, which feels too long, she looks at me wistfully. Then she nods. "We won't allow it."

"Never." Once again, I have to blink back tears. This pregnancy is changing me. It's making me far too emotional.

While I try to keep my emotions in check, Sky links her arm with mine. "Come on, the class won't wait for us."

A few seconds later, we slip into the solemnly quiet room. Thick curtains hang in front of the windows, and the indirect light creates a cozy atmosphere. I take a deep breath and look forward to forgetting the negative energies I encounter daily at the academy for one evening.