The Darkest Song (The Eternal Darkness Duet #1)

Chapter 7

Chapter 7

N ightmares plagued me, making me relive my attack. Then the dream changed, and I was attacking Allie. I ripped her apart and drank all her blood, then I left her body on the floor in my apartment. Then the dream changed again, and I was standing over my mothers grave. It was night, and it was raining heavily. The rain washed the dirt away, until I could see her coffin, then the coffin opened and my mother crawled out. Her body was half decomposed, and I was terrified. I wanted to run, but my feet were frozen to the ground. She grabbed me with skeletal hands and yanked me to her, then she sank her teeth into my neck.

I woke with a cry, shooting straight up in bed. My heart pounded uncontrollably while my eyes darted around the room, searching for my mother.

“Sarah?” I jerked my head towards the door at the sound of my name. “Are you alright?” It was Adam.

I shook my head quickly, trying to rid my mind of the terrifying image of my mother.

“I’m coming in,” he called, as he opened the door. He stepped into the room, his eyes immediately falling on me in bed. “I’m sorry,” he said, his hand still on the doorknob. “I heard you cry out...”

I swallowed. “I had a nightmare.”

He nodded slowly. “That happens a lot in the beginning. At least, it did to me.” He looked away, his expression troubled, as if he were remembering.

“Is it night?” I asked, not wanting to have to go back to sleep. If the nightmares would continue, I didn’t ever want to sleep again.

“Yes,” he said, looking at me again. Our eyes met and held for a moment, then he cleared his throat and looked away. “I’ll be downstairs.”

He stepped out of the room and closed the door, and I listened to the sound of his footsteps as he walked away before I threw off the blanket and jumped out of bed. I went into the bathroom to wash my face and brush my hair, before going downstairs. I saw my torn, blood stained clothes on the bathroom floor, and decided to stick with Adam’s t-shirt and gym shorts.

When I started down the stairs, I saw Adam in the entryway below. He stood in the open doorway, looking out, and when he heard me approach he turned to look at me. I smiled nervously and continued down the stairs.

“We have a lot to discuss,” he said, when I reached the bottom. “But first you need to feed.”

My stomach plummeted, and I started shaking my head. “I can’t. I’m not ready. What if I end up killing them? I can’t kill another person.” But even as I said the words, my lips trembled with anticipation.

Adam held up his hands to stop me. “Calm down. There isn’t anyone within miles of this place. Vampires can survive perfectly well on animal blood, and the surrounding forest is full of them. Come on.” He turned and walked out the door, and I took a deep breath to steady myself before following him outside.

When I stepped out into the night air, my senses came alive. The stars sparkled like diamonds, and the breeze against my skin was a caress that made the hair on the back of my neck stand up with pleasure.

“Are you ready?” Adam asked, startling me.

“What?” I jerked my head to look at him. “No!”

He smiled reassuringly. “You’ll be fine.”

I shook my head. “I’m not ready.”

He walked over to me and took both of my hands in his. I looked down at our joined hands, then back at him.

“You need to feed, Sarah. If you go too long without it, your vampire instincts will take over and you’ll lose control. That’s when bad things happen.”

“But I threw up all the meat I ate,” I reminded him.

“Vampires need fresh blood to survive, not old processed meat. That’s why you threw up.”

Oh.

“Now close your eyes,” he said.

I narrowed my eyes at him.

“Close your eyes,” he repeated, giving my hands a squeeze. I did as instructed, and he released my hands. “Now listen.”

At first all I could hear was my heartbeat, pounding in my ears. It sounded too loud, and too fast.

“Be calm,” he murmured. “Focus on my heartbeat.”

“I don’t think I can do this,” I said, but then I heard it. It was slow, and steady. I could feel my body relax as my heartbeat slowed to match his. After a minute our hearts and our breathing were completely in sync.

“Now what do you hear?” he asked softly.

“The wind,” I said, keeping my eyes closed. The wind sounded like music, far off in the distance. But there was so much more. “I hear frogs. And there are mice in the grass. There’s something in the woods.” I turned my face towards the sound, and hunger hit me.

Without thinking, I opened my eyes and ran towards the woods. I darted into the trees, dodging branches as I cut through the underbrush in search of my prey. I moved with a speed that shouldn’t have been possible, and leapt onto the animal before it even knew I was there.

Kneeling on the ground, I gripped its body tightly as I sank my fangs into it. I sucked deeply, letting my eyes close as warm satisfaction poured over me. I drained it quickly, then pulled my fangs free and licked the blood from my lips. My tongue scraped over my fangs, and I shuddered with pleasure. Then I opened my eyes and saw what I had done.

Regret consumed me as I looked down at the rabbit in my hands. I’d been so lost in my hunger, I hadn’t fully realized what I was doing, but looking at its small, lifeless body made me want to cry. I sank back on my heels, and ran my hand over its soft, brown fur, and I felt heartbroken.

I heard Adam approach, and I looked up at him through the red shimmer of tears. He crouched beside me, and lifted the rabbit out of my hands and gently lay it on the ground.

“It's okay,” he said softly, taking me by the hands. He stood, pulling me up with him. “We feed to survive. It's no different from a human eating a steak.”

I looked up at him. “I don’t know why I’m so upset. I didn’t even cry when I killed that man. But this feels different.”

“That man had it coming, Sarah. He didn’t deserve your tears.”

I looked at the rabbit. “It was so helpless. Rabbits are so gentle, and I-” I broke off on a sob, and Adam pulled me into his embrace. I rested my head on his chest, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, and let him hold me while I cried myself out.

He rubbed my back, not caring that I soaked his shirt with bloody tears. When I finally stopped crying, I pulled back and looked up at him.

“Thank you,” I murmured, sniffing.

“You don’t have to thank me,” he said softly. “Come, let's go back to the house.”

“We can’t just leave her,” I said, looking down at the rabbit. And suddenly I realized why I was so upset. The rabbit was Allie. Soft and gentle, innocent, and completely undeserving its terrible fate.

Without a word, Adam sank to the ground. He thrust his hands into the earth, pushing through the vegetation and dirt as if it were nothing. I watched, stunned, as he dug a hole with his bare hands, and buried the rabbit. When he was done, he stood and brushed his hands on his pants.

“Thank you,” I said. “I know it’s foolish-”

“It's not,” he said, interrupting me. “Nothing about you is foolish."

I looked away, embarrassed, but also pleased by his words. I turned and started back towards the house, hyper-aware of his presence as he followed. I was puzzled by how comfortable I felt with him. He was a stranger, and a vampire. I should have been terrified, but for some reason I felt safe. He felt safe.

By the time we stepped out of the woods, I’d calmed considerably. “I think I want to stay outside a while longer,” I said, as we neared the house.

“Do you want company?” he asked.

“Sure.” He sat down on the porch steps, but I remained standing. “Thank you,” I said, without looking at him. “For being so understanding, and for helping me and letting me stay here.” I shot him a glance and saw that he was watching me. I looked around, taking in my surroundings. “Everything looks so different. Everything shimmers. It's so beautiful.” I looked up at the sky. “Do you ever get used to it?”

He leaned back on his elbows and tipped his head back to look up at the sky. “Eventually. It took years for the newness to wear off. Now, I’d give anything to see a sunrise.”

I looked at him. “But some vampires can go out in the sun, right?”

“Yes, but it will be a long time before I reach that point.”

I walked over and sat on the steps next to him, and leaned back on my elbows to look up at the sky. We stayed that way for over an hour, with neither of us speaking. It should have been awkward, sitting in silence with a stranger like that, but it wasn’t.

Eventually my thoughts turned back to the problem at hand, me being a vampire , and I spoke, breaking the comfortable silence between us.

“I’ve replayed everything, over and over again, trying to make sense of it all. I can’t stop thinking about the vampire that attacked me.” I turned my head to look at him. “Why bother changing me just to abandon me? If they just wanted to feed, why didn’t they put me in a trance or whatever, and heal the wounds from their bite? Or kill me, right?”

He frowned. “The thing is, changing a human involves more than just feeding from them. It's not something that can happen by accident.”

I thought for a moment. “Maybe they planned on coming back later, except I went to the store and then ended up here with you? They could be at my apartment right now, waiting for me.”

He shook his head. “That doesn’t seem likely. As your sire, they are completely responsible for you. Which means they would be held responsible for any trouble you caused.”

“Trouble, like what happened in the park,” I said, my mind racing.

“Exactly. Every vampire remembers what it is like to be a newborn. That initial hunger…” His voice trailed off as if he were remembering. “Leaving a newborn to fend for themselves is to release a terror upon the world. Which would definitely draw notice from the human authorities. Which is exactly why abandoning a newborn is forbidden.”

“Who would do that?” I asked. “Who would risk angering the, um, Strategoi like that?”

“Someone who had nothing to lose.”

“What do you mean?”

“There are criminals in the vampire world, just like in the human world,” he explained. “Rogue vampires who like to stir up trouble. Not everyone is content living under the Strategoi’s command.”

“So a criminal vampire changed me without consent to piss off the Strategoi?”

He shrugged. “It's possible.”

I slowly shook my head. “I might never know who did this.”

“I hope you never find out, Sarah, because that means that whoever did this to you never finds you.”

He was right, but going the rest of my existence without answers was going to make me crazy. I sighed and looked back up at the sky. We fell back into silence for a while, but I was no longer able to enjoy it.

“I think I’m going to bed,” I finally said, standing. “I mean, I just need to be alone for a while.” I hesitated. “Um-” I broke off, not knowing what to say.

“Call out if you need anything,” he said, understanding. “I’ll be nearby.”

“Thanks.” I exhaled with relief and went inside. I spent the rest of the night laying in bed, staring at the ceiling, trying to come up with an explanation for why a vampire would change me. I eventually drifted off, and thankfully, did not dream.