The Darkest Song (The Eternal Darkness Duet #1)

Chapter 25

Chapter 25

T he next few nights flew by. We swam naked in the ocean, which of course led to other things. I played violin for him, and he taught me a dice game from the middle ages which quickly turned naughty. I discovered gambling could be fun when the loser had to pay up with sexual favors. I began to suspect he was losing on purpose. Every night we talked for hours, and when dawn approached, I fell asleep in his arms.

One night, while we were lounging by the pool, Julian informed me we’d be returning home the following evening. One of his siblings was getting married and there would be a week-long celebration.

His announcement surprised me. I hadn’t realized vampires got married, and when I said as much, he laughed. “It's not as common for us, as it is for humans, but it lasts a lot longer.”

I rolled my eyes playfully. “Sure, when you’re immortal.”

He turned his head to look at me, his expression becoming serious. “Vampires take their vows seriously. Divorce doesn’t exist in our world.”

I rolled onto my side on my lounge chair, so I was fully facing him. “How do you know you're choosing the right person? Staying married for a few decades is hard for humans. How do you manage it for centuries? What if you grow apart?”

“We’re not human, Sarah. We don’t love the same. When two vampires fall in love, something inside of them clicks, like two halves of a whole coming together.”

I’d had that exact thought about Adam, that I became whole when I was with him. The reminder tugged at my heart and I rolled onto my back to look up at the sky.

“What is it?” Julian asked.

I just shook my head.

“Sarah.” He swung his legs off his chair and sat up, facing me.

I shook my head again. “I’m so confused, and have no one to talk to.”

“You can talk to me.”

I laughed, harshly. “Can I?” I shot him a look. “About Adam?”

A muscle ticked in his jaw. “Yes.”

I sat up and turned sideways on my chair so that I was facing him. “Okay.” I paused, not knowing where to begin, or how much I should reveal. “I thought I loved Adam, after only a few nights. When I was human, I would have laughed at that. I’d have said it was impossible to fall that fast. But when I was with him it felt real.”

Julian opened his mouth to say something, but I cut him off. “And now I’m with you, and I feel-” I shrugged and looked away.

“How do you feel?” he asked softly.

“I feel… A lot.” I threw my hands up in frustration. “How can I feel this way with you, when I felt that way with Adam? And if what I felt with him was only a reaction to his blood, how do I know my feelings for you aren’t the same? The second I tasted your blood I wanted you. I wanted you so bad I’d have let you fuck me right there in that cell, with Adam chained to the wall. And what happens if I drink from another vampire? Will I fall in love with him too? How can I tell what's real?”

Julian held up a hand to stop me. “First of all, you will never drink from another vampire. You belong to me, for better or worse.”

Part of me wanted to slap him for the reminder, but another part of me was thrilled.

“Maybe you did love him,” he said, surprising me. “Vampires fall fast, and hard. It's like our animal side instinctually recognizes our mate when we meet them. But it's also true that our blood is an aphrodisiac to other vampires. That's why we feed during sex. You would’ve desired Adam as soon as you drank his blood, which happened when he changed you.”

I was confused. “What do you mean, I drank his blood when he changed me?”

“When Adam changed you he drank nearly all of your blood. When you were at the verge of death, he would have cut or bit himself and fed you his own blood. That is how we are created. When his blood filled your empty veins, you were changed.

I squeezed my hands into fists and felt my nails cut into my skin. “None of it was real. He orchestrated everything, and I fell for it.”

Julian reached over and took my hands in his. “There’s no way you could have known. You weren't even aware vampires existed.”

I stared at our clasped hands. “Then how can I trust what I feel for you? Is it real? Or is it because I drank your blood?”

“What do you feel for me?” he asked softly.

I wasn’t going to admit that it felt like love, so I lied. “I don’t know.”

He gave my hands a little squeeze. “Then say nothing. Let's just enjoy being together.”

I knew it wouldn’t be that easy, but I nodded. “Okay.”

T he next night we flew home. When we arrived back at the castle, Maria was waiting.

“I need to speak with you,” she told Julian, the second we walked in the door.

He sighed heavily. “Can it wait?”

She glanced at me, then back at him. “No.”

He pressed a kiss to my hair. “You head up. I’ll be up shortly.”

I nodded and headed for the stairs as Maria followed Julian down the hall towards his office. But I didn’t have to wait long. Julian walked into my room only a few minutes after me.

I smiled as he entered, then I saw his expression. “What's wrong?”

“Nothing serious,” he said, looking around the room. “But we need to leave again. There’s been some trouble, and I need to go handle things.”

“And you want me to go with you?”

His head jerked towards me. “Yes.”

I blinked, surprised by his tone. “Okay.”

He ran a hand over his jaw. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be snapping at you.” He gave me a small smile and stepped towards me, reaching for my hands. “I want you to come with me. When I’ve handled my business, we can enjoy ourselves. London is wonderful this time of year.”

“London!” I smiled excitedly. “I’ve always wanted to go to London!”

“Good!” He pulled me closer, wrapping his arms around me. “I can’t wait to show you around.” He dropped a kiss on the tip of my nose. “I’ll send Helen up so she can help you get packed.”

“Now?” I asked, wanting more than a nose kiss.

“Yep.” He swatted my ass before walking out of the room.

Okay. I was going to London.