The December Market (Shelter Springs #2)

21

Rafe adored his mother, but sometimes she could be more stubborn and unreasonable than he was.

It made him hurt for Amanda, for the stigma she bore with some in town simply because her father had been Dennis Taylor.

She didn’t seem to be bothered by his mother’s obvious reluctance to accept her help, though he knew it must sting.

Instead, Amanda simply went to work helping load the remaining merchandise into boxes and taking apart the shelving units and pegboard. She listened to Isaac’s nonstop chatter, she was cordial to his father, she talked easily with Crista, who apparently served on a library committee with Amanda.

When his brother, Joe, and their two kids showed up to help, she seemed easy and comfortable with them, too.

She didn’t even seem to notice that his mother’s spine was straight as a frosty tree branch, about to snap.

Finally, when everything had been packed away, he saw that Amanda’s mouth was tight with fatigue. He wanted to pick her up, tuck her against his chest and carry her out to her SUV. If not for his stupid broken arm, he might have tried it.

She stayed at it until they had carried the last display piece out to Joe’s truck, then gave them all a polite smile.

“I’ll take off, then. Thank you for all your hard work making the market a success,” she said to Crista. “I hope you’ll think about coming back next year. Your paintings and ornaments have always been a huge hit.”

Crista shuddered. “It’s hard to think about next year at this point, to be honest. Right now if I never see another watercolor brush again, I won’t mind at all. I just want to get through the holidays and make it safely to Utah next week to see my family. But I expect I’ll be back again next year. I love doing it.”

“I’m glad to hear that. Good night, everyone.”

Rafe did not like the idea of her walking to the car by herself. “I think we’ll take off, too,” he said quickly. “I can come over to the house if you need me to help you unload the truck.”

“Not necessary,” his younger brother said. “I’m going to park the truck in the garage and unload after the holidays.”

Rafe hugged his mother and sister-in-law, nodded to his dad, then grabbed Isaac’s hand. His son was tired as well. Rafe could see the signs, confirmed when Isaac didn’t protest at having to leave before his cousins did.

The two of them headed out behind Amanda, reaching her as she walked out of the convention hall to the parking lot. She looked up in surprise when she sensed their presence. “Oh. I didn’t realize you were leaving as well.”

“Yes. It’s been a long day for Isaac. We’re parked right by you,” he pointed out.

“Oh. Of course.”

“Bye, Amanda,” Isaac said, giving her another of his generous hugs that always seemed to take her by surprise.

“I’m sorry about my mom,” Rafe murmured. “I’ll talk to her.”

She shook her head with vigor, looking alarmed. “Don’t. She didn’t do anything.”

“Maybe not overtly. But we both know she wasn’t very gracious, when you were only trying to help.”

She shoved her hands in the pockets of her parka. “My presence upsets her. I understand that. The pain of losing your cousin is still fresh and I’m a reminder of that.”

“She can’t hold you responsible for something that was not your fault in the slightest,” he pointed out again.

“Look! It’s snowing,” Isaac exclaimed, interrupting their conversation. He stuck his tongue out to catch a snowflake, which made Amanda smile and lose some of her fatigue.

“Good night,” Rafe murmured. “I hope you have a restful day tomorrow.”

“I plan to sit on my sofa and do absolutely nothing except cuddle my cats, read a good book and maybe wrap a few presents.”

“You’re going to come to my concert, though. Right?” Isaac said anxiously.

She smiled. “I’ll be there. A delightful December concert will be exactly what I need to put me in the holiday mood.”

“I wish we had a cat,” Isaac said. “Can I come visit your cats?”

“Sure. Whenever you want, as long as your dad says it’s okay.”

“We’ll see.”

He sure hoped Isaac didn’t become a nuisance. His son could go after what he wanted with a single-minded determination he only could have inherited from Rafe.

“Good night. It’s been fun hanging out across the row from you for the past two weeks,” he said.

She gave him a doubtful look. “Why don’t I believe you?”

“Maybe under all those cute holiday sweaters, you’re a big skeptic.”

“Possibly.”

“Good night,” he said again, leaning in to kiss her cheek, savoring the scent of cookies and strawberries and Amanda.

He would have liked to give her another real kiss but it was snowing and the parking lot was filled with people, including his son.

She had told him he couldn’t kiss her again. That didn’t stop him from wishing for something he couldn’t have.

Rafe found the chance to talk to his mother about Amanda the next day when he and Isaac decided on impulse to drive to the Shelter Inn retirement apartments to visit Paolo the afternoon before Isaac’s school performance.

They had just walked inside the building, Isaac running ahead, when Rafe spotted his parents coming toward them from the other direction.

“Well, hello,” Louise said with delight, hugging Isaac. “This is a nice surprise. What are you doing here?”

“We made chocolate pretzel logs today and thought Abuelo might like some,” Isaac informed her. “We have red ones and green ones and some that are red and green. They’re soooo good.”

“I’m sure he will love them. That’s very nice of you,” she said with raised eyebrows at Rafe.

“I had a wild hare,” he said with a shrug. “We made some for our neighbors and had some extras. I had to come up with something to keep Isaac entertained today. He’s been awake and going hard since six and is a little jacked up for his show tonight. And for Christmas in general, I guess.”

She chuckled. “Boy, can I relate to that. You always loved the holidays. You had enough energy all through the month of December to light up the whole town’s Christmas lights.”

“Sorry I was such a pain.”

His ADHD had seemed like a curse when he was younger, until he figured out strategies to deal with it, like staying physically active.

“You were never a pain,” his mother declared, giving him a fond smile. “You just had a big personality trapped in a child’s body.”

“Well, thanks for putting up with me.”

She shook her head. “I would do it all over again a hundred times if I had the chance.”

“Can I go see Abuelo ?” Isaac asked, clearly impatient with the conversation and eager to give their treat to his great-grandfather.

“Yes. Go ahead.”

“Do you think he’ll let me play with the remote control car while I’m here?”

“I wouldn’t be at all surprised.”

Isaac grinned with delight and raced toward his grandfather’s apartment, carrying the plate of pretzels they had made.

“I’ll come with you, mijo . I think I forgot my hat,” Rafe’s father said.

It was the perfect opportunity to talk to his mother, one he couldn’t pass up.

“Have you been visiting Abuelo all afternoon?”

“No. Only a few minutes. I made green pozole today and you know how much he likes it, so we decided to drop some off for him so he doesn’t have to fix dinner before the concert tonight.”

“That’s nice of you.” His mother was usually kind to everyone, which made her coolness to Amanda stand out in stark contrast.

“I’m actually glad to have the chance to talk to you.”

“I’m always glad to talk to you too, son,” she said with a smile.

He hesitated, remembering that Amanda had asked him not to talk to his mother. He decided he needed to do it, anyway, even if he did feel more than a twinge of guilt at overriding her wishes.

“I wanted to ask you something.”

“Oh?”

No other way to do this than to be straight. “Why don’t you like Amanda Taylor?”

She visibly tensed, suddenly wary. “Who said I don’t like her? She’s a lovely woman.”

“Yes. She is. Yet you hardly ever exchange even a handful of words with her.”

“Sure I do.” Louise looked startled. “I talk to her all the time. I chatted with her last night while she was helping us take down your sister-in-law’s booth at the market.”

“No. You didn’t. When you couldn’t avoid her completely, you spoke in monosyllables.”

She gave him a sharp-eyed look. “Why should it matter to you whether I talk to Amanda? Are you interested in her?”

He wasn’t prepared for his mother to turn the questions back on him, though he should have been. That was one of her favorite tactics to catch her children off guard. Follow a question with a question.

“We’re friends,” he said, grateful he didn’t blush or he would be fiery red in this moment. “We happen to be close neighbors now, and for reasons I don’t quite understand, Isaac suddenly adores her. Beyond that, she works tremendously hard for the town of Shelter Springs.”

His mother was still eyeing him with growing interest, making him wish he had never brought up the topic.

“There’s more to it, though, isn’t there?” Louise said.

He could never seem to fool his mother. Even when he had been an unruly teenager, into trouble with his cousin and his brother, Louise had somehow always known. She used to tell them she had spies everywhere.

They had believed her. How else could she have such an uncanny knack for finding out all the dumb things they used to do?

“Amanda is a kind woman who has endured a great deal of tragedy in her life. She’s also innocent of anything her father did. It’s not her fault Dennis Taylor climbed behind the wheel while under the influence. It’s not fair to blame her for Alex’s death.”

“I don’t,” she protested.

“On some level, I think you do. Why else would you be so cool to her? You’re always friendly to everyone else except Amanda. It’s a stark contrast, obvious to everyone.”

His mother looked horrified. “If that is true, I’m sorry,” his mother said after a long moment. “I didn’t mean to hurt her. I wasn’t aware I treat her any differently than anyone else or that anyone else could sense my...turmoil.”

“She can see it. It cuts her. For what it’s worth, she blames herself, not you.”

His mother closed her eyes. When she opened them, he saw they were filled with sadness. “You’re right. When I see Amanda, I’m reminded of her father and that dark time, as fresh and raw as if it happened yesterday. When I see her, I somehow feel like we have lost our Alex all over again, right at the time of his life when he was on the brink of amazing things. It makes my heart hurt.”

“Mom. I miss him, too.” Alex had been far more than just a cousin. He had been Rafe’s best friend, as close to him as Joe and their sister. “But imagine for a moment how hard all of this has been for Amanda over the years. She was only a teenager too, yet for all this time, she has been forced to carry the weight of her father’s choices.”

His mother pressed a hand to her mouth and he saw tears forming in her eyes. “That poor girl. She must hate me.”

“No. She doesn’t hate anyone. She only feels sorrow for us and the pain our family and all the other families involved have endured. I’m afraid some part of her feels like she has to pay penance for what her father did.”

“She most certainly does not. Oh, that breaks my heart. How do I make it right? I should talk to her. Apologize.”

He considered that. If his mother talked to her, Amanda would know he had gone to Louise despite her wishes. She would likely be angry with him. He decided that was a small price to pay if it eased some of her pain.

“You could talk to her, if you feel it’s necessary. Or you can simply try to treat her from now on with the same warmth and kindness you show to everyone else. I think that would make a big difference for her.”

“I will definitely do that,” Louise vowed. She gave him a careful look, and Rafe tried to keep his expression impassive and bland.

He apparently didn’t succeed.

“You do like her, don’t you?”

He frowned, feeling his face heat again. “I told you. We’re friends and neighbors.”

Louise chuckled again and reached up to touch his cheek. “I know my son. I suspect there is more to it than that. But you don’t have to tell me right now.”

He hesitated, then plunged forward. “Would it bother you, given all the history between our families, if Amanda and I did start to...have a relationship?”

He couldn’t quite believe he was actually considering the possibility—or that he was talking to his mother about it. But somehow over the past month, Amanda had started to work her way into his heart.

“Absolutely not,” Louise assured him, looking delighted. “If she makes you happy and treats you and Isaac in a loving, kind way, that’s all I want for you. Especially after everything the two of you have been through.”

“Thanks.” He hugged his mother, grateful for her constant support. He suspected her feelings toward Amanda wouldn’t change in an instant, but he knew that now Louise was aware her reserve was hurtful, she would do everything possible to change it.

His mom would be on board. Now he only had to persuade Amanda to give them a chance.

He expected that to be a much harder sell.