The Fallen Ones (Holloway University #1)

9. Caleb

Chapter 9

Caleb

M y pulse coursed quickly though my veins. Picking Lily up shouldn’t be so damn hard, but here I was, riding the struggle bus about it. I knew it was the impending party and night coming up that had me all twisted in knots.

This was a different pick-up though. This was something that just felt so suffocating, I wasn’t sure how to navigate it. Our friendship had always been so easy and calm. We were like two puzzle pieces that just fit together. Made for each other.

Now?

Hell. I couldn’t tell which way was up or down. Having nearly kissed her now, I was feeling so much torment at the desire for more, for a repeat, that I was losing my damn mind. I hadn’t told Jace or Damien about what transpired between me and Lily. Her small body shuddering at my touch. My nearness. The way her breath hitched and her brilliant gray eyes searched me for something I was desperate to give her.

I’d almost lost it on her. She wanted to be forced, well, I wish I’d have just said fuck it all and gone for it, even if she screamed at me to stop.

God, what the fuck was happening to me?

I’d had to jerk off twice after I left her place. Once in my car and once in the shower.

The party wasn’t far away, so I just had to keep it together until then.

“Caleb?” Lily’s sweet voice pulled me from my current dilemma and brought me careening back to the present.

“Oh. Hey. Sorry. I was going to knock,” my voice trailed off. I offered her a quick smile instead, hoping I wasn’t coming off as weird as I felt.

“You’re so odd,” she said with a laugh, grabbing her jacket off a hook by the door and stepping out to greet me. I smiled at her and took notice how close her body was to mine. I nearly broke and reached for her, but I snapped out of it and took a step away to put distance between us.

“So, costume shop and dinner?” I asked as she fell in step with me. I knew this was the plan since I’d texted her to see what she was up to today. I knew I had to get Damien’s devil costume request in and since I knew she still hadn’t gotten a costume, this seemed like the best way to do it. Unfortunately, it also reminded me of the last time I’d gone into a costume shop with her and how close I’d been to sealing the deal.

We hadn’t spoken of it since. Not even a hint of it. It was like it had never happened at all.

I found that troubling for reasons I really didn’t want to explore.

“Yes.”

We made it out to my car, and I opened the door for her. She slid onto the seat of my Buick, and I closed her in and went to my side and got in.

I started the engine and glanced at her. “Any ideas on what you want to be for Halloween?”

“Invisible?” She let out a nervous laugh and twisted her fingers into her lap as I pulled into the street.

“Why invisible?”

She shrugged and looked out her window. “I don’t know, Caleb. I’m sort of back and forth on this party thing. Shouldn’t losing your virginity be special? Shouldn’t it be with someone you love or at least like a little bit? This whole idea just seems dumb, especially when I couple it with the fact I’ve sworn off those feelings?”

“Have you though, Lil bit?” I asked gently, glancing at her again. She looked so sad as she sat in her seat, her fingers tugging at a loose string on her sweater.

She frowned at my question before staring out the window again. We drove in silence for a long time before she finally decided to answer my question.

“I-I don’t know. I want to be normal, but then I see this ugly memory on repeat in my head of my mom whenever I think I’m coming around to falling for someone.” She sighed. “I guess I don’t know. Maybe this party will help.” She gave me meek look. “Or it’ll be another awful experience to add to my list.”

“This experience is going to rock your world,” I said fiercely as I put the car into park at the store. “I know it will.”

A smile teased her plump lips. “Why are you so positive?”

“Because. I’ve had sex many times just to do it. It’s a great feeling, especially when you know there’s no strings attached.” I came up with my answer quickly, really hoping I didn’t fuck up by saying no strings attached. All I wanted to do was bind Lily in as many strings as I could and keep her at my side for eternity.

“I just hope I don’t suck,” she said with a weak laugh.

I took her hand in mine and stared into her pretty eyes. “Lily, you’re perfect. You were made to love and be loved. I wish you could understand that.”

She stared back at me for a moment before we both instinctively leaned closer to one another.

“Promise?” she whispered, her warm breath feathering across my lips.

“With everything I am.”

Fuck it. Just kiss her. Make your move. Do it. Fucking do it…

A horn blared out from behind us, making her jerk away from me. I let out a soft curse, my pulse thundering in my ears. Slowly, I eased away and let out a breath. Staring out the window, I sat there for a moment trying to collect myself before Lily’s soft voice broke through my tormented thoughts of her.

“We should go,” she said, clearing her throat.

“Right.” I opened my door and got out. She was already out of the car by the time I tried to round it to open her door for her.

She offered me a quick smile, her cheeks flushed. “Do you want to grab some pizza after? Or Chinese?”

“Either is fine,” I answered, hoping I sounded normal as I opened the door to the shop. She followed me in and quickly went to a costume rack.

“I don’t think being a sandwich is the way to go,” I said, smirking as she touched a costume which looked like a slice of bread with peanut butter on it.

“You’re right. It’s a couples’ costume.” She moved past it and went to look at bodysuits for cat costumes.

I watched her touch various costumes for a long time before I grabbed a red body con slip dress with cutouts along the sides. The dress left very little to the imagination, which was perfectly fine by me. Quickly, I grabbed a sparkly red mask along with a devil’s tail and horns headband with thigh high red high heel boots and approached her. If I could get her to wear this, Damien might not be such a prick the next time I saw him.

“Hey. I think this would be an awesome costume.” I presented the items to her.

She stared at them for a moment before finally meeting my eyes. “A devil?”

“Yeah. Think about it. You’d be doing wicked little things all night long, hopefully. There isn’t a better costume out there. Plus, you look stunning in red, Lil bit.”

Her lips quirked in the corners for a moment before she looked back at the items in my hands.

“Try it on. You know you want to,” I coaxed.

She hesitated for a moment before taking the costume from me and going into the dressing room. I breathed out a sigh of relief and crossed my fingers.

The moment she stepped out to show me the costume, I nearly fell over. Fuck, I’d never seen a hotter woman in my entire life. My dick reared its head in my pants as I envisioned her legs in those boots wrapped around my waist as I fucked deep into her tight, virgin pussy.

“What do you think?” she asked, spinning in a circle for me.

“Uh, wow,” was the only answer I could get out of my mouth.

“Is it a wow good or a wow bad?” She twisted her fingers in front of her and licked her lips.

“It’s a wow good. You look…fuck, Lily. You look good.” I dug my phone out of my pocket and turned on the camera option.

“What are you doing?” she called out, her voice wobbling.

“Taking a picture so you can see you the way I see you,” I answered, half-lying and half-truth. I wanted her to see herself, but I also needed to get a photo off to Jace and Damien so they knew what she’d be wearing at the party.

I captured the picture and quickly went to show her.

She stared down at it for a long time before nodding her head.

“Yeah?” I asked. “You going to do it?”

“Yeah,” she answered, her voice breathy. “I am.”

“Awesome. Go get undressed and we’ll get this bought.”

She gave me a nervous smile before heading back into the dressing room.

I thumbed out a message to our group task to the guys with her photo attached.

Caleb: She has her costume. Damien, you fucking owe me.

Jace: God. Damn.

Damien: You owe me. You’re welcome.

Caleb: I’d rather she be an angel.

Damien: She is…until she’s not.

Jace: I don’t even care what she is other than mine.

Caleb: Ours. Not yours. Remember our deal.

Jace: Whatever. Ours.

Damien: Don’t try to steal her for yourself, Jace. You think we have problems now. Fuck me over on this and the shit we went through will be a fucking picnic next to what I’ll do to you if I don’t get what’s coming to me.

Jace: Fuck off.

Caleb: Knock it off. We have a deal. She belongs to all of us. We need to learn to deal with that. But I’m with Damien. I’ll help him fuck you up if you screw us over.

Jace: I’m not going to screw anyone over. I said I’d share and I will, so shut the hell up over it.

Damien insulted him some more, but before I could reprimand the pair, Lily came out fully dressed in her street clothes again, the costume in her hands.

“Ready?” I asked, stuffing my phone back into my pocket.

“Ready.” She gave me that wobbly smile again before I led her to the cashier to purchase her stuff.

“Let me,” I said, swiping my card before she could.

“No, Caleb?—”

I turned to her abruptly and ran my thumb along her bottom lip. It was a knee jerk reaction I didn’t think through. She stared up at me with wide, surprised eyes.

“Only thing you say to me is ‘Yes, Caleb’. Understand?”

She nodded mutely before I released her and grabbed the receipt. I had no idea why the fuck I did that, but I knew it was only the beginning to all the things I was prepared to do to her and for her.