The Geography of Happiness (Mackenzie Country)

Epilogue

6 months later

Terry

I set my steaming cup of tea on the side table and slid back into bed with my teeth chattering and my breath fogging in front of my face. Winter in the Mackenzie was no laughing matter and my Painted Bay wardrobe was going to need an upgrade. In Painted Bay I’d greeted the colder months with little more than a switch from shorts to jeans, the addition of a jersey or sweatshirt, and maybe a coat if it was raining.

The Mackenzie Basin was a different beast altogether. Layers of thermals and a polar-rated jacket didn’t go amiss even on a good day, when the sun glistened off the snow-clad hills and a bluebird sky beckoned you outside for a brisk walk. Add a hoar frost and a howling southerly and you didn’t breach your front door without life support and an emergency beacon.

It had taken six months, but Hannah and I had finally finished packing most of our Painted Bay life into storage containers on my parents’ farm, jammed the remainder into a van, and headed south to Mackenzie country. To Oakwood. To Spencer’s house... to our house.

Six months of hope, worry, second-guessing myself, second-guessing Hannah, and second-guessing the craziness of what I was doing. But never once did I second-guess Spencer. Never Spencer. In the bedlam that was our life for those six months, Spencer never hesitated once in his commitment to come to wherever I needed to be. Sometimes for just a few days every couple of weeks, usually longer if he could manage it.

We couldn’t have done it without Matt who made no bones about the fact he wanted Spencer to stay in the Mackenzie and was willing to do whatever he could to make that happen, even though we couldn’t promise him anything at the start. We had to be open about where we landed if this thing between Spencer and me was really going to happen. So much couldn’t be predicted.

I didn’t remember the moment I realised I was hopelessly in love with Spencer, I just was, like it had been that way forever. And if we worked hard, the rest would fall into place, I had to believe that. And finally, there we were. In Oakwood. And I couldn’t have been happier.

There were still a lot of unanswered questions about the future. I had zero idea what I was going to do for work, for one, although that didn’t worry me as much as it maybe should’ve. When Jam found out I was planning to move, he’d been knocking at my door the next day, keen to sign a lease on the hardware store with the option of buying me out down the track. Two weeks before we moved, we made that lease official, which gave me a bit of money to live on whilst I figured myself out.

When I floated a few ideas with Spencer about maybe training as a primary school teacher or a social worker, he’d been super supportive. But I’d also been approached by a friend of Liam’s, regarding a position as a disability support worker for the regional Otago area, a possibility that genuinely excited me. But I was determined not to rush into anything. It had been a whirlwind and stressful six months, and the idea of making decisions that were centred more around what I actually wanted and my future was an entirely new way of thinking. It was going to take time to get my head around it.

I took another swallow of tea, my warm breath puffing white into the milk-grey dawn illuminating the room. My gaze landed on my phone. Ten past eight and all was well.

And it was.

Finally.

Spencer’s first visit to Painted Bay over the New Year had been a nervous one for us both. Although we’d spent a wonderful week together in Auckland waiting for Hannah to recover enough to come home, it had still felt like we were living in a bubble, not reality. Returning to Painted Bay changed all that.

Coming clean with Judah was one of the hardest things I’d ever done. Admitting that I’d once harboured feelings for him had shocked the hell out of Judah, but it went a long way toward soothing any hurt feelings he nursed. I was gonna miss that snarky drama queen in my daily life like losing a limb. We’d been each other’s rock, but our friendship was tougher than any geographical distance. We knew that. And Judah had been stoically in my corner for the rest of the shenanigans that entailed when I came out to everyone else.

Family and friends were... surprised... read: shocked. And I was pretty sure Leroy was still getting over it. All except for Amber, who said she’d wondered about me more than once but was delighted I’d found finally someone who made me happy. Everyone took it on board, ribbed me endlessly for a few days, asked a bazillion questions, and then got on with life. When they finally met Spencer, most everyone loved him from day one. Judah too, although in typical protective Judah style, he took a little more time getting there.

As for Spencer, he fitted into my Painted Bay friendship group like a glove, a fact disturbing in itself. He rolled with all the good-natured ribbing and gave as good as he got. I was so proud of him. In contrast, I could’ve killed Leroy and Fox when they took Spencer out to see the mussel farm and made sure he got a good dunking in the ocean just to see if country vets could swim.

Fucking friends.

But although Spencer enjoyed the ocean and persistently said he was happy to settle wherever it best suited us, I knew in my heart that he desperately missed his mountains and merinos. But even more surprising was the fact that I did too. The Mackenzie had won me over, but exactly how to get us all there had remained an unanswered question for months.

A persistent wound infection had set Hannah’s recovery back by weeks, and with the pressure to give Nolan Academy an answer, I’d almost fucked things up by running scared... again... and deciding she couldn’t go.

Hannah’s reaction had both surprised and dismayed me. Outright anger—something I’d rarely seen in my daughter. She told me I was jumping to conclusions, that I needed to trust the medical team who had no issue with her attending under a strict rehabilitation protocol, and to trust what I’d taught her and how I’d raised her.

I’d stubbornly refused to listen, and it needed Judah and Spencer relentlessly tag-teaming on Hannah’s behalf that allowed me to finally understand that most of my concerns were rooted in my own issues and not Hannah’s. As long as her medical team approved, she should be allowed to go. She deserved to go. She was ready to go. And if anything untoward happened, we’d deal with it like we’d always done, as a team, only this time with Spencer there as well.

The crisis cemented Judah and Spencer’s friendship.

I started work with a counsellor.

And between Hannah, me, Nolan Academy, Spencer, Judah, and even Amber—God help us—we nutted out a plan.

I rented a small flat in Wellington and for the first semester, Hannah stayed with me while Spencer came and went as he was able. Amber became a regular fixture in our lives, learning about Hannah’s needs and capabilities as they forged a new relationship. There were tears and misunderstandings along the way, but Amber and I weren’t teenagers anymore and we got through it, becoming friendly, if not exactly friends.

It was a win for everyone.

When Hannah’s rehab started to reap benefits toward the middle of the first semester, she moved into the Nolan dormitory along with Gabby, and I handed over the role of primary backup to Amber while I supervised from the wings , waiting for it all to go to shit while Spencer did his best to distract me.

It didn’t go to shit. Not even a little bit. Go figure.

The Academy was delighted with their new student and Hannah blossomed before our eyes. She was where she needed to be. The plan was that I would visit regularly while she was in school, and in vacation time she would come to me... to us in Oakwood. Spencer had even gifted a budget for Hannah to set up her chosen bedroom exactly how she wanted it.

And finally, we were there... along with a posse.

Because, of course, we had zero chance of being able to leave Painted Bay quietly or with any grace. Oh no. That would’ve been way too easy.

Instead, we’d been shadowed every step of the way by a bunch of nosy friends wanting to eyeball the place, not to mention the men living there, all so they could stamp their seal of approval, for fuck’s sake. The same friends who were right then holed up in the cottages at Miller Station and fraternising with the locals—namely our other group of friends—the ramifications of which didn’t bear thinking about. The shenanigans that went down at the huge cookout at Miller Station the night before only served to prove my point.

Liam and Leroy—one of the stranger meetings of minds—had hit it off from the start, spending hours around the firepit debating rock bands and plotting the demise of the known universe. Holden, Jules, Fox, Morgan, and Zach bonded over a discussion on the business vagaries of fisheries and sheeperies—as Leroy liked to call the stations just to take the piss. Judah, Gil, Kane, and Abe bemoaned the state of the New Zealand dance scene, argued the best clubs in London and New York, and discussed the contextual and psychological history of tango.

I was still recovering.

Best thing about the whole evening had been watching everyone ooh and aah over the newest addition to Miller Station—the beautiful wee Kirby Alice Nichols-Lane, a two-month-old bundle of gorgeousness who was passed around the huge circle of eager arms like she was the best present ever.

Zach and Luke looked like every other new parent, exhausted and barely able to keep their eyes open, while Gil and Holden were clearly smitten in their roles of doting godparents. I’d watched closely as Gil cradled Kirby to his chest and whispered soft nonsense as she slept in his arms. His eyes glistened with tears and so much love that my heart almost couldn’t take it.

So, when he and Holden announced their own surrogacy plans over dinner, I wasn’t surprised, although everyone else clearly was. That included Zach and Luke who whooped with delight and ripped out of their chairs to embrace the other couple amidst many tears. There were going to be some great stories told to those lucky kids about their parents sometime in the future, and I hoped I’d be around to witness them.

Spencer spooned me from behind, his arm snaking around my waist. I smiled and pushed back into all that bare hot skin. His hold tightened, like he wanted to make sure I wasn’t going anywhere. He needn’t have worried. I was done being anywhere except with him.

The geography didn’t matter as long as we had each other—a lesson that had been a long time coming. Along with the reminder that I also had a right to a life and that my happiness counted as much as Hannah’s. Now we had a chance for both.

“It’s too early.” Spencer’s warm breath brushed the nape of my neck, sending goosebumps popping down my spine. “Go back to sleep.”

“I can’t.” I rolled in his arms and kissed him on the nose. “Besides, it’s after eight.”

His eyes remained closed. “Like I said, too early.”

“We’re supposed to be there by ten.” I poked a finger into his chest. “We need to get moving.”

“Mmm. I’ll get right on that.” He snuggled further under the blankets, making me chuckle.

I peeled one of his eyelids open with my fingers. “You do realise Gil will be cooking everyone breakfast in the homestead by now. Aren’t you worried what they’re talking about? Just the idea of it terrifies me. We should’ve stayed the night like I said.”

Spencer groaned in protest. “And do what exactly? Supervise?”

I patted his cheek. “Precisely.”

He snort-choked. “Our friends don’t need supervision.”

“Maybe yours don’t,” I huffed. “Mine are a different story.”

Spencer opened one eye. “You have a point.” Then he kissed me on the nose. “Don’t worry, they’ll be fine. Gil’s in charge. But... since we’re both awake—” He snuggled closer. “—I have an idea how to fill our time rather than talking about our friends.” He yanked our groins flush to emphasise his intent, and to be fair, he made an excellent point.

I pressed my mouth to his and he held me in place with a hand around my neck, his tongue sliding between my lips to sweep through my mouth. I loved the way Spencer kissed in the morning, slow and considered, like he had all the time in the world. It was the best part of my day.

“Gotta love morning breath,” he murmured, ending the kiss with a lick up the side of my face.

“Speak for yourself.” I licked him back. “At least I diluted mine with a cup of tea.”

“Ew.” He shuddered. “Even worse.”

“Shut up.” I ran a finger through the heavy scruff along his jaw and pressed a kiss in place, the prickly sensation still fresh and exciting even eight months down the track. “It’s only Judah and Leroy I worry about.” I brushed the hair from Spencer’s lashes. “Those two are trouble.”

Another groan from Spencer, louder this time. “I see I’m gonna have to work through this inane conversation while I up my game.” He aligned our naked bodies, his cock thick and hard against mine.

“Argh,” I grunted. “I’ll admit that’s a good start.”

“Told you.” He kissed me softly. “And Morgan and Fox will keep the others well under control.” He kissed down my neck.

“I’m not so sure.” I slid my hand down his back, grabbing his arse and giving it a squeeze. “Until the day I die, I’ll never forget watching Leroy try to flip a sheep onto its back under Holden’s direction. I’ve never heard cursing like it. Fox almost pissed himself laughing.”

Spencer chuckled against my neck. “Until it was his turn. He’ll be wearing those bruises for days. Holden sneakily chose one of his wiliest ewes. Even I’ve had trouble with that old lady.”

“I knew it.” I pulled Spencer’s head up so I could kiss him more thoroughly. “The whole damn thing was rigged. And damn, if Judah and Abe weren’t the only ones to actually manage it.”

Spencer nibbled the lobe of my ear, sending fire to my balls. “Judah is a lot stronger than he looks.”

“Mmm.” I stretched my neck to the side so Spencer had better access and grumbled, “He’ll never let us forget it, the smug bastard.”

Spencer chuckled. “Your own effort was stellar also, if a little misjudged.”

I scoffed. “You’re biased. Getting one leg off the ground doesn’t count.”

“I could kiss it better.”

I cupped his face in my hands and met those wicked eyes. “Not that leg, you idiot.”

Spencer’s hand slid around my dick, his thumb brushing the slit. “But it feels so... swollen and... tense. A massage could relieve the stress, and I prescribe one immediately.” He squeezed and I drew a sharp breath. “I also call time on this conversation. I want your friends out of bed right this second.” He repeated the swipe manoeuvre thingy, and I swear I saw stars.

“Okay... deal. Fuck that feels good. Come here.” I hooked his top leg over mine, slid my hand between his thighs to cup his balls.

Spencer grunted, his teeth latching onto my neck, one of my many, many hot buttons he’d discovered over the months. Then again, maybe it was just Spencer. And maybe it was me too. I’d come a long way in six months, an eager and willing student in our bed, and Spencer’s misspent bachelor days had come with some excellent pluses in that regard. There weren’t too many tricks he’d missed along the way and I was down to learn all of them.

“Hey,” I protested as he flipped me onto my back before disappearing under the covers to swallow my delighted cock down his throat. All protest ceased. Instead, I threw the covers back so I could watch him work, thankful for the shiny new lock on Spencer’s bedroom door.

The sight of my dick shuttling in and out of Spencer’s mouth never ceased to fascinate me. It was my favourite thing and he knew it. I let him go for a bit and then laid a gentle hand on his head and he immediately rolled onto his back.

I scrambled to my knees, straddled his chest, and fed my cock deep into his mouth. He took it all, his eyes fixed on mine, so much love swimming in their depths it almost broke my concentration. He tried to pull me deeper, but I kept my rhythm. Spencer might love the feeling of me deep in his throat, but I loved those short, sharp jabs of pleasure at the shallower end. Compromise was a thing. Shallow, shallow, deep, until his face blew red, saliva dripped from his chin, his eyes glazed, and sweat ran from his brow in the ice-cold room. Until a burn started at the base of my spine and electricity thrummed through my body. Almost... almost?—

I grunted as he flipped me onto my back and shoved the lube into my hand. “I want to come on your cock.” He straddled my hips and smiled at my furrowed brow. “I’d prepped for last night until we zonked out, but I’m still good to go.” He winked and I couldn’t stop the grin that spread over my face.

“Well, all righty then.” I popped the lid on the lube and slid a set of slick fingers between his legs. “But we need to be fast.”

“Quick and dirty?” Spencer leaned down for a kiss. “Sign me up.”

The second our lips met, I slid the first finger into his arse. One quickly became two, but after a few thrusts, Spencer pulled himself free and shuffled into position.

I steadied my cock and frowned up at him. “Are you sure that’s enough?”

“Mmm, hmm.” His expression changed to one of intense concentration as he held my gaze and began to slowly sink down.

Tight heat engulfed my cock centimetre by centimetre—skin on skin and so fucking incredible, I still cried almost every damn time. It wasn’t our go-to. It wasn’t something we did on the regular, but I loved it just the same. We’d been with each other so long before the first time we did anal, tested and so sure of each other by then that any need for condoms was quickly dismissed. Now, I couldn’t imagine doing it any other way.

I hadn’t bottomed for Spencer and I honestly wasn’t sure it would ever be my thing, but he seemed not to care. He said he was happy with how things were and he didn’t give a fuck if I was never ready. When we were in the mood, he craved me inside him, and that’s all there was to it.

“I love you,” he whispered, leaning forward on his hands to brush his lips over mine. The change handed me control, giving me room to rock up into him as he focused on working his own cock. “So good,” he grunted softly into my open mouth. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” I whispered back, my dick pushing through the tight clench he had around my shaft. Almost there. Almost—a wave of heat unfurled in my belly and exploded in my heart, releasing a shuddering soft cry.

Spencer leaned back to watch me ride the pleasure, stroking faster until he spilled onto my belly with a muffled grunt and finished sprawled on top of me.

I wrapped him in my arms. “You mean Every. Fucking. Thing. To me, Spencer. Everything. I hope you know that.”

He lifted his head. “Right back at you, baby. The whole fucking world.” He kissed me softly. “But right now, I think I’m about to go up in smoke.” He wriggled free of my arms and launched himself onto his back, his body slick with sweat. “Jesus, that’s better.”

I chuckled. “Don’t move.” I dashed to the en-suite for a quick cleanup before returning with a warm facecloth for Spencer. Then I curled against his side and listened to his breathing drift into a soft snore while I marvelled at how much my life had changed in under a year.

The scratch of Miller’s doggy nails on the bedroom door put an end to my musing and had Spencer grumbling into his pillow. “Damn dog.”

“He smells the sex,” I surmised. “Probably needs comforting.”

Spencer huffed. “What he needs is training.”

I chuckled and threw a leg over Spencer’s thighs. “He doesn’t like to share you. It’s cute.”

“It’s not cute when it interrupts our sexy times.” Spencer rolled onto his side. “Lucky that we happen to know a good dog trainer, right? Now, come here. I need to kiss you again.”

“Dad, Spence, you need to get up! We’ll be late.” Hannah’s cane rapped on the bedroom door.

Spencer groaned and fell back onto the mattress. “We’re cursed.” But there was a lilt in his voice that told me he was grinning inside. The fact that Hannah was on her canes, not elbow crutches, and that she was actually ready before us, was a big, big deal. It had taken four months of hard work and physio, but her determination had finally paid off, and for her end of semester recital, she’d performed a simple dance using only her canes—the first time in over a year.

More rapping on the door. “I know you’re not asleep cos I heard you talking.”

I grinned and patted Spencer’s chest. “Remember how thrilled you were that Hannah also wanted us to shift down here rather than stay in Painted Bay?”

“Don’t remind me,” Spencer grumbled, but there was a smile on his face.

“Welcome to the world of teenagers, my darling.” I kept my voice hushed. “Zero boundaries.”

“You do realise I can hear you, right?” Hannah said saucily.

Spencer snorted and I poked him in the ribs.

“Okay, listen up,” Hannah rattled on. “Judah called to ask why you weren’t answering your phones and to tell us they plan to go fishing. He says he needs moral support so he doesn’t have to kill Morgan for even suggesting it. And Miller’s hungry. I can feed him when I feed Gabby if you want. I promised Judah we’d pick up pastries on our way. He says it’ll help him deal with the day. And do you want me to start breakfast?”

Spencer and I stared at each other. I checked my phone and held it up for him to see... five missed calls. I heaved a sigh. “I told you. The man is nothing but trouble.”

Hannah giggled. “But he’s great, and we owe him. You need to get up.”

Spencer raised an eyebrow. “She’s your daughter.”

I held his gaze and dropped my voice back to a whisper. “She loves you too, you know.”

Spencer froze, his eyes brimming. “She... really? She told you that?”

I cupped his cheek. “Not in so many words, but I know my daughter. She’ll tell you when she’s ready.” I raised my voice. “Okay, we hear you, my love button. The whole street hears you. Even Judah probably hears you. So, to answer your questions, yes, you can feed Miller. And yes, if you start breakfast, that would be great. I’ll think about the pastries, and you need to decide what you want to do. Fish or stay at the station.”

“At the station,” she shot back. “Zach has new puppies.”

I grinned. “All right. We’ll shower and be out soon. Judah will cope if we’re late. But no more shouting... please.”

“Cool bananas,” Hannah answered breezily, and the hall fell quiet.

I shook my head and fell back on the bed. “Teenage girls. Who knows how their brains work?”

Spencer nuzzled into my neck, then nipped me with his teeth. “Come closer so I can tell you again how much I love you.”

Like I was going to argue with that.

I turned into his arms and he kissed me, slow and tender, his fingers threading through my hair, a soft hum of pleasure in his throat—like I meant the world to him, like he’d been waiting for me forever. “I think we were always going to find each other,” he murmured. “Even if you’d never come to the Mackenzie. Somehow, some way it would’ve happened. I have to believe that because the idea of living without you and Hannah feels like a special kind of lonely hell. I went through a lot of people before you walked into my life, so I know what a rare find you are—” He ran his nose through my hair. “—and how fucking lucky we are. You taught me that.”

I pulled his face around so I could see his eyes. “And you taught me that I matter. Every time I needed you, you were there, for both of us. But at least she has an idea what she wants to do with her life, unlike her father.”

Spencer’s eyes sparkled with humour. “Plenty of time for that.” He kissed me softly. “We have our own path to forge, right?”

I nodded, my heart pounding full in my throat. “We do, finally .”

He grinned and took both of my hands, bringing my knuckles to his lips. “And so it begins. The brand-new story of you and me and Hannah. Are you ready for it?” He raised a brow, his eyes swimming with an emotion I’d waited my whole life to see directed at me.

I didn’t think I could love him any more than I did in that moment, and I leaned in and planted a fierce kiss on his lips to let him know. “I can’t fucking wait.”

THE END