The Grand Duel (The Grand Men #4)

Chapter 26

TWENTY-SIX

Lissie

I don’t go home. Instead, I walk the half mile to Mayfair, heading directly to the man who has the answers to my questions.

I’m angry and in the worst frame of mind, but I can’t go home and stew on the possibility of Charles being the man I slept with at The Nightingale.

And yet I know it.

Christian confirmed it.

I know it was him without a shadow of a doubt. It’s that fact, the knowing, the obviousness of it all, that makes me feel even more stupid than the fact I trusted him.

When I arrive at his building, I walk to the main reception and ask them to call up.

“I’m sorry, he isn’t home. He asked to speak to you, though.” The man holds the phone out to me, and I stare at it, knowing Charles is waiting on the other end of the line.

I shake my head and step back. “No, that’s fine. Sorry to bother you.”

I leave the building, walking as fast as I can to the underground.

My phone starts ringing, and I stare down at it, his name lighting up the screen.

Knowing he’ll worry if I ignore it, I answer the call. “Hello.”

“Lissie, is everything okay? I had a call from James asking to let you in. You can go up if you need to. Where are you?”

I stare at the poster on the streetlamp in front of me, the entrance to the tube right beside me.

“Lis?”

I pull my coat tighter around me as my body aches at the sound of his voice.

“I’m here, Charles,” I say, my voice a broken whisper. “I’m heading home now.”

“It’s gone midnight. Why are you out?”

“I had a shift.”

“You’re finished already? I can come home.”

“No. Don’t come home. It’s fine. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” I quickly hang up, knowing it’s not fair when I’ve not given him an explanation.

But he never gave an explanation either.

He had so many opportunities to tell me.

I get home just after twelve thirty, my eyes heavy after the few days away and my head pounding. I text Jovie and ask her if she’s awake, but I already know she’ll be at work and won’t reply for a while.

She still hasn’t called me back.

I have missed calls and texts from Charles, but I don’t open them. Instead, I shower and crawl into my bed, wrapping myself in my duvet.

Charlie

I stare up at her window, wondering whether she’ll answer if I call. She didn’t answer the last ten times, but she’ll be leaving to head into the office soon, and I want to catch her.

She came to my home last night, and I wasn’t there. She sounded sad, and it only confirmed what I thought in the car yesterday, she’s still upset with me.

“Uncle Charlie, we see Daddy now?”

I feel Ellis’s feet knocking into the back of my seat. I twist, finding he’s reached across to hold his cousin’s hand. Ave smiles back at me.

“I just need to send a text, and we’ll go.”

I’ll be late in today. 11:30/45. Do you need a lift?

I’m already in the office

Everything okay?

When nothing comes back, I head over to Mason’s city home, taking the lift up to the penthouse with Ellis and Ave in my arms.

Mason waits on the other side, dressed in his suit, his phone to his ear. “No, that’s perfect,” he says, taking Ellis and kissing his head before leaning in and rubbing Ave’s full head of hair and then kissing her cheek. “Yes, cash buyer.” I follow him into the living area, letting Ave down when she wriggles out of my hold. She tots over to Mason and clings on to his legs until he bends to pick her up, making the phone conversation and kids in his arms look like a breeze. “If you can… Yes… Offer three point four cash and see what they come back with… Thanks. Bye.”

He hangs up and instantly starts fussing the kids. “Hello, Miss Waverley,” he says, tipping her back over his arm and tickling her with his face in her belly. She throws her head back, laughing.

“Daddy,” Ellis says, pushing against Ave so that he can get to his dad. “Daddy.”

Mason sits, placing each child on a thigh before looking up at me. “How’s Scar?”

“She’s okay. Said she’ll be done just after two.”

“Perfect. You free this afternoon?”

I shake my head. “I’m in court. Why’s that?”

“Doesn’t matter. Thanks for bringing them back and staying last night. Nina was shattered when she got here.”

“They both looked tired. Scarlet is working a lot. I missed these two anyway,” I say, leaning down to ruffle the kids’ hair. “You okay?” I ask.

“All good, my friend.” He gives me a knowing smile. “You?”

I nod, keeping my smile well hidden this time. “What’s?—”

Mason’s phone starts ringing, and he hands me Ave, holding up a finger to me before stepping away with Ellis in his arms. “They agreed at three point four?… Oscar, that’s great work… Yes…” He turns and looks at me. “Yeah, happy to proceed… As soon as this afternoon?”

I look down at Ave and roll my eyes. “Uncle Mase is going to be Mr Monopoly at this rate.”

“I’ll be in shortly. After two… Well, I’ll have to give the buyer’s assistant a call to confirm, but we could head over after?… Alright, mate, see you in a bit.”

“Got your fingers in all the pies, Lowell?”

“Yes. But I think you’ll like this pie, Aldridge.”

I shake my head. “I’ll see you over the weekend.”

He takes the kids, and I leave, heading for the office.

When I arrive, I follow the dogs into Lissie’s office, feeling like it’s been forever since I’ve seen her face. Only she isn’t in. Her office light’s off.

“Hello, Mr Aldridge,” Edna says to my back. “I must say it’s lovely to have you back.”

“Where’s Lissie?” I ask, turning on her.

She frowns at me, and I get instant shame.

“Sorry, Ed, I’ve got to be in court in an hour, and I thought Lissie would be in.”

“She was. She popped the files you need on your desk. I think she’s added some more notes, so check them over before heading off. She’s now over at the HQ. I think Arthur was really impressed with everything she sent over before leaving for Italy.”

I run my hand through my hair, hating that it feels like she’s avoiding me.

“How was she?”

“Quiet, actually. She’s in work mode, I think, just trying to catch up.” She narrows her eyes on me. “What’s going on?”

I nod and go to walk past her. “Thanks again for having the dogs, Ed. I appreciate the few days’ break.”

“I told you yesterday?—”

“I know,” I tell her. “But still.” I scrub at my face, feeling a headache coming on. “I’ll see you a little later, okay? I probably won’t make it back into the office until after close. Could you let Lissie know that? That I’ll be late.” I pause at my door, a thought coming to me. “Can we find a calendar that I can update on the go?”

“Like a shared calendar?”

“I want something that will send alerts, if that’s a thing. It will help us all to know what’s going on.” And it will be peace of mind for Lissie. “Something I can access from my phone with ease when I’m not where I’m supposed to be.”

“Of course. I’ll sort it on Monday morning.”

I smooth my hand down my tie as I walk into my office and to my desk. Lissie has left the file on my desk, the added notes a breakdown of new evidence provided.

Sitting back in my chair, I flip the page and start reading through the documents.

Lissie

I didn’t sleep last night, and I’m almost certain it shows today. It’s four thirty, and for the first time in…well, ever, I sit at my desk and count down the seconds to five o’clock.

The printer chugs and whirls, spitting out a piece of paper that has a lump forming in my throat.

Like a coward, I forced a smile and told Ed I’d see her on Monday morning when she poked her head around the door ten minutes ago to say goodbye.

I stand, sliding the printed paper into an envelope and sealing it.

I place it in my bag and then turn off my computer, making my way to the playroom. The dogs are asleep, completely shattered from their walk. Still, when they see me, both of their tails start wagging.

“You girls are the only thing to make me smile today.”

Luna stands, Daisy following.

I let them out, crouching down to cuddle them.

Once the lump in my throat grows too tight, I push them away and stand, letting them follow me as I go to Charles’s office.

I inhale the smell of him the second I step through the door, my eyes closing in reverence. When I open them again, it’s with the memory of his touch on my skin, the taste of him…the lie he kept.

I make my way across the room, my heart like a lead weight slowing me down, before placing the letter on his desk.

Refraining from looking around his space, I turn and head straight for the door, the sound of someone in the distance only registering for a second before Charles is walking into the room.

I stop short.

“There you are!” he says with a smile, a little out of breath. “I thought you’d left already, and I’d missed you.”

I swallow, our eyes locking and shaking me to my core. “I thought you’d be in court until late?”

“I finished up early and wanted to make a dash back to catch you.” He still wears a smile, but his eyes have grown wary. “I’m sorry I wasn’t home when you got to mine last night?—”

“I know that it was you,” I say, needing it to be known regardless of how dangerous it is when my throat is thick with emotion.

He frowns, but then I see the moment it clicks, and his smile vanishes completely, his face draining of colour. “Lis, I…I was?—”

I shake my head, hating that he doesn’t deny it. That it’s true. “I don’t want to talk to you about it right now. I thought I did, but I don’t.” I don’t dare blink, staring through him.

“Please, Lissie. Let me explain.”

“Explain what?” I snap. “That you’re a liar?”

He steps towards me, and I widen my eyes. He stops, his throat working as his wild gaze pins me. “I never lied. I just didn’t tell you. There wasn’t ever a good enough time and?—”

“A good enough time would have been when I showed up here the first day.”

“It wasn’t.” He shakes his head, his frown deep. “Trust me, please. I contemplated every scenario and what was best for you.”

“Best for me?” I repeat. “This is what’s best for me? You pretending to explore whatever this is whilst knowing…” I clench my teeth, emotion overcoming me. I swallow it down and let out a shaky breath. “I don’t owe you this conversation. I feel…I feel completely humiliated.”

I walk past him, not wanting to feel like this for a second longer. I can’t. At least not in front of him.

He stops me at the door, flattening his hand against the wood when I go to pull it open.

“Lissie,” he says, voice firm, but the panic that laces the word, my name…it hurts.

“My resignation is on your desk. Let go of the door.”

He grabs my waist and turns me, towering over me. “You’re not quitting over this.” His throat works, his eyes pleading, terrified even. “I know you don’t owe me anything. I know you’re hurt and angry. But please let me explain.”

I stare at him until it’s impossible to for a second longer, dropping my eyes to his chest.

“I wanted to tell you, and I planned to, but I knew it would make things awkward around the office. I thought about how it would go, me telling you, and there was no outcome that made sense. It was messy. It messed with my head for weeks and killed me to see you again after being with you that night.”

I shake my head, needing him to stop. “I feel like a joke. Like all this time I’ve been trying to get to know you, and then the second I think I might, I find out I don’t know you at all.”

“That’s not true.”

“You should have told me.”

“I know.”

“I let you touch me,” I croak out. “Thinking it was new and something, but it was just another round to you. Another girl.”

“No.”

“Yes,” I snap. “That’s exactly what it is.”

“Lissie, please.” He lifts my chin. “I’m so sorry.”

I brush his hand away. “Don’t touch me.” My eyes burn. “I can’t even look at you right now. I feel like I know nothing about you.”

His eyes dart around my face. “Don’t say that.”

“It’s true,” I mutter back.

I’ve never felt so stupid in all my life.

I feel his stare lingering on me still, his chest visibly shaking with each breath. “I didn’t know I’d want you like this, Lis. I had no idea when I made the decision not to tell you that I’d want you in the way I want you now. It’s not an excuse, I know that. But it’s the truth.”

“You had other opportunities to tell me.”

He shakes his head.

“Like when you flew me to Italy and put your hand between my legs.”

He stills, my words clearly hitting. He leans back, leaving room for me to open the door if I please.

I don’t know why I don’t.

“I didn’t think I had a chance with you. The more time I spent with you, the more I knew it, and I didn’t want to ruin whatever was happening between us.”

I let my eyes lift to him.

“Will you let me take you home? Please. Or to mine? Just…” He places his hands on his head, watching me. “There’s so much more to this that you don’t understand.”

“Then tell me.”

He rubs at his face. “I-I can’t.”

I huff a humourless laugh, my anger igniting again. “You can’t.” I repeat the words he gave me in bed yesterday morning. “Is there anything you can do, Charles?”

He says nothing.

I turn and pull open the door.

“You have no idea what you’ve done to me.”

I stop when he passes me and stands in the doorway, blocking my exit.

“Do you know what it took for me to touch you like that? What it took for me to be that way with you?”

I throw my hands out to my side. “I have no idea! Because you haven’t ever told me.” I stare at him, my eyes stinging. I shrug. “You can’t.”

“You didn’t tell me everything either.”

I frown, the pain in my chest stealing my breath. “I told you enough.”

“Lissie—”

“This isn’t going anywhere,” I tell him. “I’ll say something I regret if we continue to do this now.”

He steps into me. “Don’t quit.”

I clench my teeth, hating the way I don’t want to let him down, let Ed down. “I can’t continue working here with you.”

“Let me figure this out. It’s not simple. I wish it was, but it isn’t. I didn’t know how to explain myself then, and I still don’t now.” He swallows, begging me with his eyes.

My chest aches, the emotion in my throat threatening to spill over. It’s been the longest day. “I’m going home,” I say before adding with a choked whisper, “Move.”

He stands on the spot, watching me for a minute before defeat flashes in his eyes, his jaw clenching tight.

With devastation marring his face, he steps to the side.

A tear falls down my cheek the second I pass him, the dogs at my feet as I walk to the reception and head right out the doors.

I spend the entire journey home overanalysing everything I said to him. My brain works on overtime, bringing more and more pieces of the conversation into focus.

The way he looked at me.

The way he tried to stop me.

Something in my gut tells me he was being sincere, but then there’s this torn open wound that runs right down the middle of me, and that part of me just needs a minute.

I dump my things inside my flat door and make the three steps to the sofa, where I sink down and stare at the ceiling.

I still haven’t heard anything back from Jovie, and she’ll probably be asleep now, but I know that if I don’t speak to her soon, I’ll spiral into a hole I won’t be able to climb out of.

Are you awake?

I lie in the same position for over an hour before my phone pings. When I check it, a pang of pain travels through me at the name on the screen.

Charles

I’m just checking that you’re home and are okay?

I shake my head, hating how desperate I am to reply to the message.

I need Jovie.

I’m home

I’m so sorry, Lissie.

I’ll clear my weekend plans, and we can meet somewhere. I can explain everything.

Please don’t quit.

I want nothing more than for him to explain why he didn’t tell me, to make it make sense and it all go back to how it was. But all day I’ve tortured myself, going over every moment since that night.

I remember being in the office with Elliot and Mason.

“I’m there to take the load off. Make his life easier, so to speak.”

“Ahh, I see. And how’s that working out for him so far? Are you making his life easier?”

I remember thinking how odd the question was when Elliot had asked it, and yet last night, lying in bed, I cried at the realisation that they knew. They were part of the joke, and Charles sent me to them knowing that.

It’s those things, the small comments and big gestures, that seem so contrived now I know the whole story.

And so, no matter how badly I want, and probably need, him to explain, I can’t think of anything worse.

I’m not sure I’d even believe him.