-Peter-
The retreat committee meeting had been a disaster of epic proportions.
Why did people completely lose their minds even after being given clear and concise instructions?
How hard was it to read something, internalize it, and make a new plan? I did this every night and found it quite satisfying.
Apparently, I was one of the only people in the company who felt this way. Everyone else refused to release their stranglehold on the hysteria that had set in and had to be reassured every ten seconds.
I don’t know how Amelia, our CEO, had found out about our retreat committee meeting—I suspected Jessica had something to do with it—but she saved the day when she came in, gave everyone a censure disguised as a pep talk, and then left us with the mandate to make sure everything went off without a hitch.
She’d also threatened to never give us a day off again if the activity went awry, which had finally forced people to focus.
Now, an hour later than I usually stayed at work, I returned from client meetings to find Jessica still at her desk.
She’d taken off her black jacket and had rolled up the sleeves of her cream blouse. The scowl she was giving the screen was blistering enough to melt iron.
“Problem?” I asked.
Jessica jumped. That had been the second time today I’d surprised her. Perhaps it was petty, or something else completely, but startling her was strangely satisfying.
She turned and glared at me. I’d always been a little afraid of her glare, but now I found it intriguing. As long as it wasn’t actually aimed at me. In this case, she was angry at something the computer had done. Or, more likely, what people had sent her.
“Why are you back?” There was more irritation in her tone than I’d expected.
“I still have work to do.” I pointed at my office.
“You usually take it home,” she said as she turned back to her screen.
Normally, this would be when I would stop talking and head into my office, but I didn’t want to walk away from her. Not yet. “What are you working on?”
She shrugged. “Still answering emails about the retreat.”
I frowned. “Still? I thought they’d tapered off.”
“Loads more came in when people realized that they didn’t get to pick their teams.”
Amelia had been adamant about that in our meeting. “Do they know that wasn’t our decision?”
“They don’t care. A bunch of employees are threatening to not come.” Jessica sounded tired. My body leaned toward her, and my fingers twitched to rub her shoulders which were practically scrunched up to her ears.
“Tell them to take it up with their supervisors.” I stepped to stand beside her chair. Not too close, but closer than usual.
“That’s what I keep sending out.” Jessica signaled to the screen.
I read the highlighted text. She’d crafted a much more diplomatic reply than I would have. “People are still giving you trouble?”
“They are.”
My frown deepened. I should have known about this. I should have been on top of it. “Why aren’t these coming to me?”
Jessica glanced up at me with a hard look on her face. “You were with clients, and the last thing you needed was another distraction, so I took you off the recipient list.”
My heart warmed at her thoughtfulness, but my brain iced over at the realization that she’d been trying to do this alone and people had been disrespectful to her when I should have been helping.
In one swift movement, I reached out, touched her screen, and minimized the window she’d been working in. “You’re done.”
“What?” Now her glare was directed at me, but I didn’t care. I took her by the shoulders and gently pulled her to her feet.
“You’re going to go home and relax.” I reached around her and grabbed her jacket off the back of her chair.
As usual, her perfume was distracting, as was the fact that I could see her chest rising and falling from breathing hard.
Was she angry?
It didn’t matter. She needed rest.
“I’m fine,” Jessica insisted.
She wasn’t. The crease between her eyebrows told me she’d been squinting at her screen for too long, and the fact that she’d taken off her jacket told me she was more than a little frustrated. “You will be, when you get out of here. Don’t you have friends in town? Go to dinner with them.”
Jessica’s teeth clacked together, and her jaw thrust forward. Her blue eyes stared into mine, daring me to make her do anything.
I didn’t let up. She would be here for another two hours if I didn’t kick her out. “I need you on point tomorrow and for the rest of the week.” The real issue was that I needed her to be at the top of her game in case I faltered.
“What about you?” She reached out and poked me in the chest. She’d never done that before, and it felt like a knife, but instead of stabbing, it brought more of those delightful zings under my shirt.
“What about me?” I said in a soft voice.
Jessica’s gaze still held mine. “You need to unwind.”
A chime sounded from my pocket, and I remembered that I was supposed to see Marissa tonight. “I’m meeting a friend for dinner in an hour. I won’t be here long.”
Jessica opened her mouth, and I wondered if she was going to ask who I was seeing, but then she shut her jaw and shrugged her shoulders. “I can stay and finish this up.”
“No.”
“No?” She raised an eyebrow.
“No,” I said again. “You’re leaving. I’ll send a strongly worded message to all of the supervisors telling them to get their people to act like grown adults and not junior high students, then I’ll go too.”
Jessica stepped toward me, and the air between us grew dense. “I’m going to hold you to that.”
“You can.”
“I’m going to text you in an hour and make sure you’re not here.”
I nodded. “I’m going to do the same, as well as checking your account to make sure you’re not working from home.”
We glared at one another, but there was something besides animosity coming from both of us.
Jessica spoke through gritted teeth. “Fine.”
I offered her the jacket. “Have a good night.”
Jessica opened her mouth to say something but closed it before snatching her jacket away.
Our fingers brushed, and a now familiar tingle ran up my arm. “I’ll see you in the morning,” I said.
“Uh-huh.”
With that, I went to my office and slid behind my desk. I saw Jessica’s retreating form and heard the elevator ding.
Only then did I realize that I’d had that entire conversation with Jessica without having planned it first.
I hadn’t intended to bully her into leaving—I hadn’t intended anything actually—it had just happened. Naturally. Without me having to observe and rehearse beforehand.
What was the smart, sassy, beautiful Jessica doing to me?
On the other hand, when I hadn’t been reliving mini golf from the night before, I’d been thinking about how to handle Marissa.
She’d texted me a dozen times throughout the day, and I’d had to have a conversation with her about the retreat. The exchange had been short, but I’d promised that we’d talk more tonight.
After I’d composed an email to the supervisors, had Tyrell look at it, and then sent it off, I headed to the hospital.
Instead of the train, I took a rideshare. One that didn’t require me to engage in a conversation, and by the time I got to the hospital, I had a solid plan.
Keep things concentrated on Marissa’s condition and the retreat.
No talking about old times between us.
No touching.
No talking about Jessica, and if she came up, redirect to the retreat.
Allow Marissa to spew ideas for the meal after mini golf, as well as the gift baskets Ameila had decided she wanted to send home with everyone.
Do not stay for more than thirty minutes.
I’d reviewed the conversation in my mind a dozen times, and as the rideshare dropped me at the hospital, I felt I was as ready as I could be.
I was really looking forward to having the rest of next week off so I could arrange flowers and be by myself.
Unless Jessica would agree to spending the evening with me again.
That thought tried to stick in my brain, but I gently pushed it aside. I couldn’t be thinking about Jessica while I was with Marissa. She would notice my inattention and try to figure out what was going through my mind.
I didn’t want that to happen.
I waited outside the hospital for three minutes until the food I’d ordered arrived. Marissa loved sushi, and since this would be her last meal until after her surgery, I’d decided to treat her.
Her parents had informed me they would not be here this evening, which is one reason I was on guard. Marissa’s parents were a good buffer between us, and their absence was likely calculated.
With the take-out bag in hand, I made my way to Marissa’s room. She smiled when I stepped inside, and I noticed that she’d taken the time to do her hair and makeup.
I resolidified my mental checklist as I approached.
“Sushi!” Marissa squealed. “My favorite. You remembered.” Her eyes glowed with gratitude.
“Indeed.” I unloaded on a small table near the door, then took a plate to her.
“Sit with me.” Marissa patted the bed.
I shook my head and settled into a nearby chair.
Her smile remained, even as she dug into her dinner. “This is delicious,” she said after the first bite.
While pleasantries were acceptable, I wanted to keep ahead of what might happen, so I said, “Do you have any ideas for the gift baskets?”
Marissa waved a hand. “I have a whole list on my phone.”
“Why didn’t you send it to me?” I asked.
“Because I knew you’d be by tonight.”
That made sense, but now this felt like even more of a trap.
“Will you tell me?” I asked. Marissa loved to tell me things.
This distracted her. She went through her ideas, which were excellent, and chatted about the activity. She was more excited about it than anyone else I’d talked to today. After a few minutes of her telling me that she’d make a beach-themed mini golf hole with all breakfast foods, she abruptly stopped and held up a finger. “I think I should be there for mini golf.”
“You’re going to be in a huge cast.” I pointed out. I supposed, if she was up for it, someone could push her around in a wheelchair, but the doctor had told her that she should be laying down with her leg up as much as possible.
“Virtually.” She smiled. “Like a video call.”
This again.
Marissa snapped her fingers. “I know! You can have Jessica carry me around on a tablet.”
We’d talked about this before, and I’d been hoping Marissa wouldn’t bring it up again, but here we were. From what I knew of Jessica, she might enjoy doing something like that, but only if it was for anyone besides Marissa. “It’s something to consider,” I said even as I thought of three other people who could do it.
“Great, I’ll call her and let her know.”
A spike of irritation filled me. “It can’t be Jessica.”
“Why not?” Marissa pouted.
“Because I need her.”
Marissa’s jaw hinged open, and anger flashed in her eyes.
I realized my comment could be interpreted several ways and clarified. “She’s running the mini golf activity. She can’t be doing that and worrying about you. I’ll find someone else to take care of you.”
Now Marissa sulked. “Why is she running it? Why aren’t you doing it?”
I stared at Marissa. “Me?”
She laughed, and the sound was too loud for the space. “Right. I forgot. You’re not exactly a people person.”
Time for some flattery. “People are your thing.” Which was true. Marissa was usually great with people; she loved parties and found almost everyone interesting.
When I thought about her like that, she and Jessica weren’t all that different.
Except they were.
Marissa beamed. “So true.” She pushed aside her half-eaten sushi roll and looked at me. “Being trapped here has given me some time to think. We don’t do anything together anymore.”
I didn’t point out that the two of us had hardly hung out since college, and that, for my part at least, it was a choice, not an oversight.
She continued. “So when I’m out of here and can move around, we need to do stuff. There are a lot of fun things to see in the city, if you know where to look.”
Marissa was beautiful, smart, business savvy, and liked to have a good time. I’d known her since my early teens. If there was anyone I should be comfortable with, it should be her, but I wasn’t. Not even close. The thought of having to plan for an entire afternoon or evening alone with Marissa made me want to loosen my tie. It would take hours of flower arranging and maybe a pep talk from Aunt Mei before I could even consider it.
On the other hand, spending an evening with Jessica filled me with the exact opposite of dread.
I cut that line of thought off.
Keep things about Marissa’s condition and the retreat.
I steered the conversation back on track. “Why don’t you get through surgery first and heal?”
“Right. Of course.” Marissa hit me with a wide smile. “After that.”
If I told her no now, I’d have to explain, and I wasn’t even sure what to say other than I thought of her as a friend but that she drained me. So I gave a noncommittal grunt and rose to gather the plates. When I noticed she’d only had a few bites, I frowned. “You didn’t eat much of this.”
“My parents brought a late lunch,” Marissa said without hesitation.
“But you are eating, right?” I’d watched her go through this before, and it hadn’t been pretty.
“Of course!” She patted her completely flat stomach. “Just trying not to gain ten pounds while I’m here.”
It wasn’t my place to push, but I made a mental note to watch her when she came back to the office and make sure she was taking in calories.
Marissa pulled out her pout again as I threw the garbage away and picked up my suit coat. “You’re leaving already?”
“The change of plans for the retreat has caused a minor catastrophe in everyone’s mind. I have a couple of hours of work to do before I can go to bed.” Marissa knew how I felt about getting enough sleep.
“I bet.” She laughed. “Okay, well, let me know what you decide on the baskets and send me pictures of them.” She held out her arms for a hug.
No touching.
But this was Marissa, and hugging was her thing with me. I inwardly winced as I broke my own rule and went to her side.
She wrapped her arms around me, and all I could think about was how it would feel to have Jessica hug me like this. It would be a very different experience and one I wanted to have. Marissa tugged me down, and it felt like she was trying to pull me on top of her, but that could have been me just being off balance.
“Good luck tomorrow.” I patted her back.
“I’m nervous.” She squeezed me tighter.
Now I truly felt I’d been trapped. “You’re in good hands.” I straightened, and she kept holding on. So I reached around and pried her fingers apart. She finally let go and scowled up at me.
“They’ll take care of you.” I reassured her.
Before she could trap me in some other way, I gave her a nod and departed.
In the hall, I found my heart racing and my breathing labored, but it was completely different than it had been the night before with Jessica.
Same physical reaction, but the underlying causes were in contrast.
Marissa stressed me out, where Jessica put me at ease. A realization that was becoming more and more apparent to me.