The Horde King of Shadow (Hordes of the Elthika #1)

Chapter 33

SARKIN

“That’s why I chose this,” Klara said.

Again she was being vulnerable with me. Again I felt this resistance in me to give in.

“I gave you cruelty,” I argued.

And you gave me beauty.

What had I really offered her?

“No,” she said. “True cruelty hinges on your enjoyment of seeing someone suffer. I’ve witnessed that in Dothik, felt it within my own family. You would never want me to suffer, Sarkin. I know that.”

I blew out a harsh breath, leaning my forehead against hers. “I’ve given you no kindness though.”

“That’s not true either,” she said, her words brushing against my skin. “How could you think that?”

It’s not enough, I thought to myself, feeling my heart thunder in my chest. I closed my eyes. This couldn’t continue.

I made the decision, right then and there, to be better for her. Better for us .

She was soft and understanding. Forgiving.

I was cold and controlled. Unyielding.

I might not ever be the type of male she’d envisioned herself with. But I needed to try to meet her in the middle. Or else we would both be miserable. She might retreat back into herself, just like what she’d done in Dothik. I understood self-preservation better than most. I understood the toll it took.

All I knew was that it would be hell to see her like that. To see her a shell of the female before me now, with tears shimmering in her eyes and a soft, hopeful smile on her features.

Her mother raised her beautifully, came the sudden thought. But why keep that to myself?

And so I repeated the thought out loud, my voice gruff but certain, and I was rewarded with a radiant smile. I felt deep affection swell in my chest, a feeling that was becoming more and more difficult to ignore when it came to Klara. I rubbed at it, not sure I’d ever felt it so keenly, so heavily before.

“I wish I was more like her,” she told me, pulling away to trail her fingers through the starlight grass at the edge of the spread blanket. We were whispering in the meadow like two young lovers who’d snuck away from a village to be together. “Growing up, my mother longed for freedom more than anything else. I’ve been having this overwhelming thought that she would have loved to fly with the Elthika. It would have suited her perfectly. She was brave and fearless. She savored moments, like she was memorizing every last detail. She was this warm, perfect beacon of wildness and joy. She had the loudest laugh in the entire horde. I remember her laugh so distinctly, even though I’ve begun to forget her face.”

There was solemn grief mixed in with her soft smile as she spoke about her mother. I remembered my own. My mother’s quietness, her distant love, her mental retreat from me. She had become a shell because her body had betrayed her. Perhaps she’d kept me at arm’s length so that it would hurt less…when the inevitable happened.

I couldn’t help but think that our mothers were opposites of one another…and they had both loved us in different ways.

“I hate most of all that she grew fearful,” Klara told me. “She changed in Dothik, especially after my dreams became more and more frequent. Anything to protect me, to hide me from the priestesses’ watchful eye. Their ever-watchful eye. I think I became afraid too.”

Swiftly, I pulled her into my lap, catching her quick gasp, but I couldn’t stomach the defeat I heard in her voice. I rolled until we were lying on the blanket, with her stretched out underneath me, her hair a wild, wind-swept halo around her head.

“Oh,” she breathed, her eyes reflecting the falling stars above us as she looked at me.

I leaned down. She arched up, but I didn’t capture her lips in the kiss I so desperately wanted to give her. Instead, my gentle words brushed her ear as I said, “You are beautiful…Klara Dirak’zar.”

She sucked in a sharp breath, as I felt a sense of rightness take root within me, spreading through bone and vein. It was the first time I’d ever called her that. It was the first time I’d ever claimed her for my own line. Our line. The name our children would one day bear.

“Klara Dirak’zar of Rath Serok and Rath Drokka, queen of the Sarrothian. I hope you know how much of a rarity you are,” I finished, pulling back so I could meet her eyes. She looked struck. Surprised. “And you were wrong on the wildlands outside Dothik that night. You do have a great name, and it will be remembered long after you’re gone. And when you claim your Elthika, you will claim their name as well. You will be a fearsome thing.”

“Thank you,” she whispered. Her expression was serene. Her hands came to press into my chest, curling her fingers into the scales, and I wished it was off of me. I wished I could feel the naked press of her skin against my own. It had been too long already. “ Kakkira vor. ”

“I don’t see you as a tool for me to use, Klara,” I said again, risking this calm, pleasant moment to bring this thread of conversation back to the forefront. But I needed her to understand how I felt.

“Sarkin—”

“Let me say this so you never have to doubt again,” I said, brushing my fingers over her scar on the side of her face. “You were marked for me. I believe in no god or goddess in this life except in my Elthika. She marked you for me. And I answered her call.”

I felt her breathing quicken against my chest.

“We may never understand the Elthika. Not fully. They live on a different plane of existence from us. They draw their energy from heartstones, their power is like the sun to them. They are magical beings, gods and goddesses in their own right,” I said. “And Zaridan led me to you. As a rider, you learn much from your bonded Elthika and they learn from you, more than you thought possible.”

“What did she teach you?” Klara asked.

My lips quirked. “Patience and discipline. I was reckless once.”

“I can’t imagine that,” she confessed.

I brushed my thumb over her cheekbone. “My purpose in saying this is that you were a gift to me, aralye . Not a weapon to use against your people. I will spend our lives learning from you, just as I have from Zaridan. My only request is that you continue to have some patience with me.”

Her gaze warmed. She had that same struck expression, like she was seeing me for the first time.

Perhaps she was. For this was the first time I’d ever truly felt open with her.

“Of course,” she whispered. “Of course, Sarkin.”

“And I meant what I said earlier. You can ask me whatever you want, and I’ll answer you.”

She smiled. Leaning forward, she pressed a kiss to my lips, a chaste thing, but it made me restless for more.

“Let’s just enjoy tonight,” she said, her eyes trailing past me to look at the falling-star storm overhead. “Let’s just enjoy each other. We have a lifetime to talk. And we have meat pies to eat.”

I chuckled, though I’d be lying if I said a part of me wasn’t relieved. Tonight was a first step in the right direction for us. As long as she understood I would take that journey with her, that was all that mattered.

“Sarkin.”

“Hmm?” I asked.

“Kiss me,” she whispered. “ Hanniva. ”

My nostrils flared at that word like she had me trained. Before there was the possibility of her changing her mind, I captured her lips. I’d meant to kiss her gently, but whenever she said please in her language, it drove all reasonable thought out of my brain.

Her shuddered sigh drifted over my tongue, and I groaned.

“I love when you do that, aralye ,” I rasped, biting at her bottom lip. “When you breathe into me like that.”

Her hands dove into my hair, our movements becoming hurried and possessive. The fire being stoked, those embers burning low. The sizzle of falling stars overhead and the distant sound of Elthika songs joined our soft moans and the rustle of our clothes. She tugged off the riding tights hidden underneath her dress as I nibbled my mark above her collarbone.

I rolled us so Klara was on top, her bare legs straddling my hips. Pushing the material of her dress up to her hips, I watched as she unclasped the catches on my pants, pulling my hardened cock free.

“Let me feel you, wife,” I growled, hissing, my back bowing when I felt her drag the head of my cock against her slick, hot entrance.

She rolled her hips down in one swift movement, and we both cried out. And as the stars fell around us, as the starlight grass glowed with the stroking fingers of an unseen wind, I watched my wife move above me. I watched the sublime pleasure cross her beautiful expression and listened to the music we made.

A song all our own.

And I thought, How easy it would be to love her .

Only, this time, I kept that thought to myself.

In the aftermath, long after it went quiet in the meadow, long after we’d nearly finished the meat pies in the basket, we were lying next to one another. Klara’s hands were exploring me, tracing unseen things, her cheek pressed to my shoulder. I’d wrapped us up in the blanket to cover our naked flesh, shielding us from the worst of the chill. The rustle of grass around us felt calming. If I wasn’t careful, it could lull me to sleep.

But we needed to get back soon. I was loath to leave this place though. There was peace here. And that peace felt like Klara in my arms, happy and sated.

We were connected here. I didn’t want anything to ruin that.

Klara’s fingers traced down my back, and I suppressed a pleasurable shiver. I felt them pause over the textured flesh toward the base of my spine, flesh that had never quite smoothed with time. It was where my tail had once been. For a moment, I thought perhaps she’d find it too strange, that she would pull away from me, shuddering.

Instead, her touch lingered. Why had I never realized how sensitive I could be there? I felt my cock begin to throb, a low growl reverberating up my throat as she stroked and explored the old wound. I couldn’t help but capture her lips in a soft kiss. Her hot exhale floated across my tongue, making me crazed.

“You said I could ask you anything?” she asked against my lips.

The edges of my lips curled up in a lazy smile. I pulled away, knowing what the question would be. “Yes, aralye .”

“Did it hurt?”

“Not so much in the moment. After…yes. Like hell. It’s a phantom ache that takes years to shake. Sometimes I still feel it. Especially in the cold.”

“Do you miss it?”

“No,” I admitted, looking down at her in my arms. “All riders know how dangerous it can be. I was glad to be rid of it.”

“That’s what Sammenth said, that she would be relieved once hers was cut off,” Klara said.

“I always knew mine would be gone one day,” I told her. “I always knew I would be a rider. So, mentally, it was an easy transition. For others…it can surprise them, how traumatic it can feel. But it’s our duty to adapt to the Elthika. Not the other way around.”

She nodded against me, the fingernail of her thumb scraping over the scar, making me suck in a sharp breath.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, jerking her hand away.

“Mmm,” I growled. “No, it feels good, wife .”

“ Oh, ” she whispered, her eyelids going half-lidded at the purr in my voice. She smiled, and I didn’t think she knew how seductive, how beautiful it was to me.

“Any other questions?” I teased, tracing the tip of my nose against her temple.

“Let me think,” she said, her tone relaxed and languid. “Hmmm…what does Zaridan’s name mean?”

I chuckled. “What made you think of that ?”

She shrugged her shoulder, her hand returning to my back to explore more of me, tracing over deep ridges of muscles and raised edges of scars. “You said I could ask you anything.”

“That I did,” I said, huffing out my lazy amusement. “Her name comes from a word that means shadow . Zarikin .”

“That seems fitting,” she replied. “Did you name her?”

“No. She was first seen over a century ago,” I told her. “I read the records in Elysom myself. A horde traveling to the Arsadia from the north. They typically pass over the Zarikin Mountains on their way here. That’s where we believe she lived before I bonded with her.”

“She lived there with Lygath?”

“Yes,” I answered. “Or so the stories tell. The Elthika are nomadic by nature, much like your Dakkari hordes. But they do tend to return to one location more often than others, where, more times than not, they choose to nest. To hatch their young.”

“But Zaridan never took a mate, right? Or had hatchlings of her own?”

“Not yet,” I said. “The Vyrin are particular and stubborn, like I told you. As such, there are not many left.”

She went quiet, processing the information.

“And Lygath?” she asked.

“What about him?”

“What does his name mean?”

“Ah,” I murmured. “It means ghost . Spirit . Wraithling . If you ever saw him, you’d understand why. He’s so quiet. He appears out of thin air sometimes. You never hear or see him coming unless he wants you to know.”

“What?” she whispered, frowning, pressing up from my chest. Even I sensed the sudden, startling change that went through her. “Quiet, you say?”

“Yes,” I said. “Why?”

“He’s silver? A little smaller than Zaridan?”

I stilled. Silver-scaled Elthika were rare. “Yes.”

“I—I think I may have seen him.”

My heart leapt in my chest.

“ Where , Klara?”

There hadn’t been an actual sighting of him for years . He’d hidden from Zaridan, even.

“At the Tharken cliffs. That night, just as we were leaving. I?—”

She cut herself off, looking down at her own lap, unseeing. She shook her head.

“What is it?” I asked, sitting up to cup her cheek with my palm, lifting her face so I could see her eyes. “You’re sure you saw him?”

“Ever since she marked me, I’ve always seen Zaridan in my dreams,” she told me. “But I’ve always seen another too. For even longer than Zaridan.”

I jerked. “What?”

“I saw him in my dream when I went over the cliff that night in Sarroth. There was an Elthika flying over the heartstone forest, and I was running, trying to chase him down.”

She shook her head as a knot lodged itself into my chest.

“I never imagined it was him,” she confessed, looking at me. “But if that was Lygath at the Tharken cliffs, then that’s the Elthika I’ve been dreaming of since I was a child. How can it be that I dream of both of them? Zaridan, I understand, if she was leading you to me. But Lygath?”

Karag who’d had gifts similar to Klara’s had always said they’d seen their intended Elthika long before they ever claimed them.

Realization churned in me, but I didn’t want it to be true.

“What does that mean?”

I couldn’t lie to her. Not when we’d just begun anew.

“It means there’s a very high possibility that Lygath is the Elthika you have a chance at claiming,” I said. A fierceness rose in me. “But Klara, there is always a choice. Do not choose him. If you see him at the Tharken cliffs, choose another. Lygath might be Zaridan’s brother, but he is dangerous and highly unpredictable. Most believe he cannot be claimed. Countless have tried. And like most Vyrin, he has no hesitation about killing riders if he thinks them unfit.”

Her face went a little pale at the words. “You think he’s meant for me ? How is that possible?”

I shook my head. “Please, Klara. Tell me you’ll be smart about your choice, that you’ll keep a level head when the choosing comes. It draws near. I need to know you’ll stay away from him.”

If she felt the claiming bond with Lygath…I didn’t know if anything I said would sway her. It was a powerful feeling and an undeniable truth.

“There has to be a reason I’ve dreamed of him for so long,” she said softly. “Maybe this is it. Maybe Zaridan marked me not only for you but for him.”

Fuck, it was entirely likely . The Elthika could see more than we could ever hope to see.

I closed my eyes, pressing my forehead to hers as I took a calming breath, to slow the sudden thundering in my heart. “Promise me you won’t choose him.”

“I can’t do that,” she said, honesty threading through her voice.

“Klara—”

“But I can promise I’ll be smart. I’ll listen to my instinct,” she said, and I felt the warm press of her lips on the corner of my mouth. “Besides, if I fall, you promised you would catch me. Right?”

Suddenly the choosing loomed, distracting and menacing.

“Of course I will,” I answered after a brief silence. “Of course. You never have to fear that.”

I just wished I would never need to.