The Langfield Brothers: Box Set

42. Brooks

FORTY-TWO

brOOKS

Sara: Meet me in the laundry room.

Me: Why does that sound dirty?

Sara: Because I’m me. But seriously. I’m all by myself. This place is creepy.

Me: Be down in five.

Sara: Great. I’ll just sit on the dryer and wait.

Me: Sara.

Sara: What?

Me: You better not be naked when I walk in there.

Sara: Oh. Hmm. But all my clothes are wet.

Me: Crazy girl, if the guys walk in and see you, I can’t be held accountable for what I’ll do to them.

Sara: I put a sign up. The laundry room is closed for the next thirty minutes. Hurry Brooks. Don’t want me to get wrinkly.

Me: Why would you get wrinkly?

Sara: Because I’m wet!

Me: Get me out of here now.

Sara: Is there a problem, Brookie?

Me: You can’t jam a fucking plug in my ass while giving me a blow job and then expect me to sit through a press conference. Get me out of here.

Sara: Can we watch Christmas movies?

Me: Of course. When?

Sara: December

Me: When?

Sara: I said what I said.

Me: Just downloaded the Hallmark app. Think we’ll be set for December.

Sara: I love you.

Me: Chinese takeout and The Holiday lined up for tonight. You want me to pick up anything else on my way back to the hotel?

Sara: You’re my favorite person.

Me: Didn’t answer my question, crazy girl.

Me: But you’re my favorite person too.

Sara: My brother is here! Brooks! What did you do? My brother is here!

Me: Love you, crazy girl. I’ll be home to pick you all up soon. My brothers are excited for your family to join us for Christmas.

Sara: You are the best person in the world! Just so you know. I’m crying. And you are so getting lucky tonight.

Me: I’m lucky every night, Sar. Merry Christmas.

Sara: So hear me out. You, me, a bottle of bubbly, and a hot tub at midnight.

Me: You don’t want to go to the party? Rumor is that Lake will be there.

Sara: Honestly, I just want to be alone with you.

Me: Where do you want to go for Valentine’s day?

Sara: hmmm. I mean I love Italian.

Me: So Italy?

Sara: smacks face emoji Brooks Langfield, you are too rich for your own good. I meant an Italian restaurant. Although now that I’m thinking, I kind of want steak.

Me: Plane will be ready to take us to New York at six.

Sara: New York!

Me: Lennox is meeting us for dinner. You’re welcome.

Sara: Oh my God! You are literally the best.