FORTY-FIVE
GAVIN
Me: What do you know about Camden Snow?
Brooks: He’s a right winger with a wicked good slap shot?
Beckett: We pay him too much to have him on second string…
Aiden: He’s currently on a date with Millie.
Fuck. I grip the bottle of whiskey I just swore to myself I wouldn’t drink and pour two fingers into the tumbler. After a heavy sip, I lean against my kitchen counter and brace for everyone’s commentary.
Beckett: Duck. Really?
Brooks: This kind of situation warrants more than just a duck.
Beckett: I know. My ducking phone auto corrected.
Beckett: Duck.
Beckett: DUCK
Aiden: You make this too easy.
Aiden: Goose.
Me: Are you done yet?
Aiden: He’s a good guy. He’ll be good to her.
Me: The fuck he will.
Beckett: So I take it we aren’t staying away from Millie?
Me: No. I’m done with that idea.
Beckett: Do you like your face?
Me: Ford will come around.
Brooks: LOL
Brooks: Sara says that was mean. Sorry.
Aiden: I mean, you weren’t wrong the first time.
Brooks: This is Sara. All I want to say is FINALLY!
I chuckle into my whiskey glass. Exactly. That’s the energy I’m looking for. But as I stare at the clock, watching the time slowly drag on, I worry that I might have real competition now. Camden is a catch. Obviously. He plays for the NHL. Though I could change that. I grunt as I force that idea from my head.
So yes, he plays for the NHL, he’s closer to her age, he doesn’t have a kid, and he isn’t best friends with her dad.
Fuck. This situation really is shit.
And he also hasn’t treated her like absolute garbage for the past few weeks like I have.
I glance at my phone again, wishing Millie would text me and tell me she’s having a terrible time. Or that she regrets going out. Fuck, even if she texted to ask about Vivi right now, I’d be happy. At least then I’d know she’s thinking about us. That we matter.
This is ridiculous. Why am I just staring at the clock? Dropping the phone onto the kitchen counter, I grab my whiskey and head into the living room. Bypassing the couch, I go straight toward the grand piano I bought for the only woman I’ve ever loved. Then I settle on the bench in front of the instrument that has never been played, and in my dark apartment, I run my fingers across the ivory keys.
The sound that comes from the instrument is jarring, making me pull back with a sharp breath in. I glare at the damn thing, then curse under my breath. I’m a fucking idiot. The last thing I want is to wake Vivi. It’s after eleven p.m. With my luck, she’ll be up in another hour or so anyway. I should be reading up on how best to handle teething. Maybe searching the margins for Millie’s replies. There has got to be something out there that will take Vivi’s pain away.
Mentally, I add it to the list of the thousand things I want to do tomorrow. I hang my head and let out a resigned sigh. Every inch of my body is buzzing with adrenaline. I’m desperate to tell Millie how I feel, to tell her father that I’m in love with his daughter, and her brother that he’s just going to have to deal with it. I’m ready to tell the world that she’s mine , and she’s out on a fucking date with someone else.
Keys jangle in the hall, and then the knob is turning and the door is opening, and there she is, her auburn hair wild. The relief that hits me is so bone deep I rub my legs to soothe the ache. In doing so, I hit the keys on the piano, startling us both.
“Shit.” Millie jumps and spins, her eyes wide. Then, wearing a confused frown, she steps forward. “What are you doing?”
“Did he kiss you?”
“What?”
“Did. He. Kiss. You?” I grind out.
She tilts her head, her shoulders lowering. “Gavin,” she says, her voice soft, placating.
My blood is pumping as I wait for her response. “It’s an easy answer, Millie.”
“No.” She clasps her hands in front of her. “We grabbed dinner and watched a movie.”
I spin on the bench so I’m facing her. Like this, with me seated and her standing, she’s barely taller than me. My mouth waters as I get a hit of her fruity scent, as I get lost in the way she licks her full lips. The moonlight filtering in makes her golden eyes glow and brings out the freckles dotting her skin like constellations. She’s effervescent, her dark curls so perfect I have to clutch my thighs to keep from pulling on one.
“Did you want him to kiss you?”
Millie juts her chin out defiantly. “What do you want me to tell you?”
“The truth. Do you think about kissing him? Does the idea of your lips touching his make you ache? It makes me ache, Millie. Makes me sick to my stomach. Makes me want to trade the kid, but only after I beat the shit out of him. But I can’t really do that just because he’s looking at my nanny.”
She presses closer to me, her knee bumping mine. “Your nanny? That’s all I am to you?”
Tipping my head back, I grasp her by the backs of her thighs and hold her in place. “You know you’re more than that.”
“You called me Peaches,” she taunts, one brow arched. “Earlier, when I walked out of your bedroom, you said, ‘Sleep okay, Peaches?’”
I suck in a breath at the sharp pain that lances my chest. I did.
Gently, she strokes my cheek, her expression softening. “And you wear a bracelet that says Peaches on your wrist. How long, Gavin? How long have you been wearing that?”
I close my eyes, relishing the feel of her hands on me again, soaking in her heat and inhaling her scent. I want to commit every detail of this moment to memory. Millie drapes one leg over my thigh, then the other. I grip her waist so she doesn’t fall as she settles on my lap, straddling me. The heat between her legs has me stirring to life and squeezing her tighter, holding her to me, trying to wrap my brain around what’s happening right now.
She clutches at my shoulders. “How long are you going to pretend we’re nothing when we both know that, you and me, we’re explosive together?”
“Exactly,” I say, my throat thick. “Explosive. We’ll blow up our lives. We’ll blow up the lives of everyone we know. I was willing to do that, Millie. I was willing to destroy my relationship with everyone I knew so I could have you. But then you destroyed me.”
Eyes glistening, she presses her palms to my cheeks. “I destroyed me too. But I wasn’t ready.”
My gut twists, and so does my expression. “And I’m supposed to believe you suddenly are?”
“No,” she whispers, ducking and giving me the most earnest look. “You’re supposed to see that I am. For weeks I’ve been here every step of the way. Not because I’m your nanny, but because I’m your person. I’m your person, and you’re mine. Please stop punishing me and touch me. Kiss me . Because the only person I ache for is you.”
Her golden eyes are imploring, begging me to believe her. In those eyes, I see my future. I saw my future in them a year ago too, when I showed up at her apartment in Paris. I think I saw it the day on the plane when I found out who she was.
If I hadn’t, I wouldn’t have risked blowing up my friendship with her father. I wouldn’t have risked my reputation. She was worth it all. And though she broke my heart when she told me she wasn’t ready, I’m not even upset that things turned out this way.
Because when Vivi showed up at my door, had Millie been here, had we not gone through these tests and trials, I would have wondered if she felt obligated to stay. I’d have worried that she was settling and that she’d one day regret being forced to mother a child who wasn’t hers.
But now? Now I know she loves my daughter. She chose my daughter even when I didn’t choose her .
We’ll be stronger because of our time under tension. I’m confident in us, in our future. And I’m not worried, because even in the face of my hostility, Millie loved me and fought hard to get us here.
I press a thumb against her bottom lip, and she moans in response, her hot breath washing over me.
“Please, Gavin.”
“Please what?”
“Soothe the ache. Make me feel better. Make us feel better.” She sucks my thumb into her mouth.
Heat washes over me, and my need for her threatens to take over all logic. “You drive me fucking crazy, Peaches.”
She bites down on my thumb and swirls her tongue again, making my cock throb.
“So punish me,” she taunts. “Spank me, bite me, fucking devour me. But don’t shut me out.” She rolls her hips. “Don’t deny me. I can’t?—”
The pressure against my hard length makes my control snap. I spin her and lift her onto the piano keys, the sound jolting and yet so perfect for the uncontrollable sensations taking over. With my hands on her thighs, I hold her in place.
“You can’t? What about me? What about what I need? You want me to punish you, but I want to worship you. I need to apologize for how I’ve treated you. I failed you. Failed us. I should never have walked out that door. And I never should have let you end us because you were scared. So baby, please say I can have you. Promise me you’re mine. Put me out of my misery and tell me you’ll never let me walk away again.”
The air between us grows so thick I may suffocate as I wait for her to promise me forever. Whether she understands the implications or not, that’s what I’m taking. Her forever.
“I’ve only ever been yours,” she whispers, slipping a hand down her chest. “My body.” With a pinch to her nipple, she gasps. “My heart.” She uses her free hand to tip my chin up. “Me.” Her lips ghost against mine. “You have owned all of me since the day you took my virginity.”
“And I always will,” I promise her.
I don’t take that responsibility lightly. I may not be the man her father would have chosen for her, but I’ll protect her. I’ll care for her. And I’ll love her every day for the rest of my life.
Finally, I wrap my hands around her waist and pull her closer, barely registering the dissonant sound of the piano keys as she brushes against them, because the moment her lips are on mine, she’s all I feel, all I see, all I hear. Our tongues tangle together, and our moans mix, creating the most beautiful tune.
From this moment forward, it’s the two of us and Vivi. No one else matters.