The One Who Holds Me (Sovereign Love #4)

24. Alex

24

ALEX

THEN

“ I ’m really sorry, dude.” Kwame removes his baseball cap and places it on the bench we’re sitting on. “If I had known things would turn out this way, I would’ve kept my opinions to myself.”

“It’s okay, man.” I shrug, staring into the distance at the fall leaves scattered over the green grass. “It’s not your fault. I’m actually glad you said something because now I know the truth.”

Silence passes between us for a few minutes as students walk past to and from campus. Sirens go off in the distance, reminding me about the busy New York streets and how much I miss exploring them with Olanna. She and I used to walk on this side of campus most weekends when we needed a break from studying.

Kwame’s apartment is close by, so when I told him I was on my way home from my library shift, he insisted we speak face to face. I’ve been avoiding human contact as much as possible the last few days because I need the space to think, but Kwame, as usual, has figured it out and he won’t let me get away with it.

“Alex, please, don’t take this the wrong way, but I gotta ask, man.” Kwame looks me in the eye. “Why?”

I shrug before leaning back on the bench. “Why what?”

“Why does this bother you so much? Even if your parents had told you, it’s not like they know where to find your birth parents. Your parents have given you everything you’ve ever asked for. Isn’t that enough?”

“No.” I raise my voice slightly. “No, it’s not enough.” I lean forward. “You don’t get it, do you? I feel lied to and cheated on. They had twenty-one years to mention something to me. I would’ve looked for them.” I pause before continuing.

“I need to know about my roots and why I am the way I am. I need to know if I share any characteristics with my birth parents and whether I have relatives out there—brothers, sisters, uncles and aunts. I need to know whether there’s anything in my family history I should know. I don’t want to wait ten years down the line to find out I have a genetic disorder I could’ve planned for.” I turn my head away and stare at the trees in the distance.

Kwame stays silent while I calm down, and then he speaks. “Okay, I get it now. But, dude, how are you going to find all of this information when your parents don’t know themselves? It’s not like you can just get up and go to Ghana, so why are you torturing yourself?”

A lightbulb moment shines on me, and I straighten my back before looking at Kwame.

When realization hits him, he shakes his head. “Alex, no.”

“Yes, yes, yes. That’s a brilliant idea.” I clap my hands and tap Kwame’s shoulder. “I can even go alone.”

“Alone? No, dude, that’s a terrible idea. You can’t just go to Ghana now. How about you wait till summer vacation? Didn’t your parents plan on taking you there after college graduation?”

I push myself up and walk the length of the bench. “No, summer is too far away. I can’t wait.”

Kwame stands up too and puts his cap back on. “But will your parents ever agree to this?”

“Once I explain to them, they will. Fall break is only two weeks away and I’ve got some money saved up from my library shifts. I have a Ghanaian passport, so I don’t need a visa. All I need is to book a flight and sort out accommodation.” Excitement surges through me as I whip out my phone and start searching for cheap flight tickets to Ghana.

“Alex, wait.” Kwame squeezes my shoulder. “I worry that you’re making hasty decisions without thinking about how people around you will feel. Look at the situation with Olanna. You still haven’t told her about the surgery and I worry that when this is over, it’ll come back to bite you hard. Please, think about this before you make a decision you’ll regret.” He pats my back before walking away and heading toward his apartment.

I pause my search on flight tickets and sit on the bench again, mulling over Kwame’s words. But no matter how much I think about it, the situation remains the same—I need to know the truth.

Back in my apartment later that evening, I sit on the edge of my bed and stare at my phone, trying to give myself some time to change my mind. But the more time I waste, the more certain I become that this is what I want to do. My parents won’t like it, but I hope they’ll understand once I explain.

I pick up the phone and dial Dad’s number before putting it on speaker. He picks up on the second ring. “Hello, son.”

I exhale before responding. “Hey, Dad. Is Mom there with you?”

“Yes, she is.”

“Son, are you okay? Is the pain getting worse?” Mom’s panicked voice comes through the phone.

“No, everything is fine. In fact, the pain is ninety percent gone. I need to talk to both of you.”

“Okay, we’re listening.”

I lean forward and rub my forehead before saying a silent prayer. “I would like to go to Ghana during fall break…alone.”

There’s silence for a few seconds as I expected, and Mom is the first to break it. “What do you mean, alone?” she asks and when I explain the same reasons I told Kwame, she raises her voice. “What is wrong with you, Alex? Why are you acting as if we committed the greatest sin in the world by adopting you? All we have ever done since you came into our lives is love you like our own child.” Her voice breaks and she sniffles. “You are our child, Alex. Our only child. Now you just want to leave us?”

“Mom, I never said anything about leaving you. Of course, you’ll always be my parents. All I’m saying is that I need to know the truth about who I really am.”

“But you’re an Obeng and you always will be,” Mom says between sobs and Dad still hasn’t said anything. “You just had surgery and you're still recovering. Why would you want to travel alone?”

“Mom, I’m no longer in pain and I’ll have my follow up with the doctors before traveling.”

“Yaw?” Dad’s soft voice comes while Mom’s sobbing fades. “Are you really sure you want to do this?”

I nod before remembering they can’t see me. “Yes, Dad. It will give me peace of mind.”

There’s a pause before Dad sighs. “Okay.”

Relief washes over me while Mom speaks again. “Okay? Daniel, d?n na ?haw wo ? Why are you agreeing to this?” she says and then continues in Twi as the sound of retreating footsteps come through the phone, followed by the slamming of a door.

“Please, don’t worry about your mom. We never planned for you to find out like this. I’ll speak to her.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

He responds with another sigh. “But son, can’t you wait until Christmas or summer break, so we can go with you?”

“I’ve thought about this and I think it’ll be best if I do this now, Dad. Please.”

He exhales. “Okay. I may not fully understand your reasons, but I agree you deserve some closure. How long are you planning on being there for?”

“Just the week of fall break.”

“Have you looked at tickets?”

“Yes, and I can afford them.”

“You also need to sort out accommodation.”

“Yes, I’ve been looking, but I haven’t reserved one yet.”

“Don’t worry about that. We have some vacant apartments in our properties in Accra. I’ll sort something out for you.”

“Awesome.”

“I also have a friend in Accra who has a tour guide agency. I’ll ask him to arrange for someone to help you navigate your way around Accra. I’ll also send you all the information we have about the orphanage.”

“Thank you so much, Dad. I really appreciate it.”

“You’re welcome. Good night, son.”

Getting off the phone, I walk up to my bedroom window and watch the blanket of stars spread across the sky. Soon. Very soon. I’ll find out the truth about my birth mom and why she abandoned me.