The Only Song (Only You)

7. Jaxon

Chapter 7

Jaxon

“ J axon, you needed to chat?” Bert stands before me. A flash of red hair dips behind the closing doors and when I glance around, the room is empty, except for me and Bert.

“Yes.” I force the words out of my dry throat. I made the choice earlier today, and it’s the right one. “I want to change stand partners.”

Bert’s eyebrows shoot upward. Yeah, I bet he wasn’t expecting that . But my nerves around Sadie haven’t settled, nor has our bickering in rehearsal stopped. I had to do something.

“No,” he says firmly, then turns away to pack up his music score.

My head rears back. I’ve negotiated about my partners in the past. I’m used to a discussion, but Bert’s tone clearly shows this isn’t up for one. Am I really about to be stuck with her for the next three months?

“But—”

“No.” Bert glares this time.

I stifle my groan. Sharp pain spears between my brows, a headache I’m sure is from this very situation.

“Is there some bad blood between you two?” Bert asks.

Bad blood? I don’t think I could call secretly hiding a boner when she gets too close to me bad blood. Or the fact that I spend most of rehearsal staring down my music stand so I don’t stare at her. But the secret I’ve been hiding about after that night six years ago? That could be considered bad blood—except she knows nothing about it and never will. If Sadie finds out about what happened while we’re on tour, it’s going to make for the most miserable experience ever in my life. Even worse than the day I walked out on her.

“Jaxon, I really don’t see what the issue is here,” Bert continues, packing away his baton now. “Sadie was first on the waitlist. You even voted her in.”

“She doesn’t have the experience,” I blurt. What am I doing?

The conductor turns to me slowly, his gaze so piercing it makes me want to swallow my words whole.

“What she lacks in experience, she makes up for in skill. Not everyone can keep up with you, Jaxon. But she can.”

My breath freezes. All the feelings I had when I was in college resurface. Fears of being replaced. Anxiety over not living up to my expectations. Now add Sadie in the picture. On good days, she felt like motivation, but on bad days, she felt like a threat. If these past two weeks were challenging, the next three months will be torture.

I open my mouth to speak, but Bert cuts me off again. “No one is changing seats. And Jaxon? I’m only going to tell you this once. Clean up your bickering or I’ll find replacements for you both .”

My body tensed as if an ice bucket was just poured all over me. There’s no malice in his tone, just the strict nature of a conductor who wants an orchestra running like a well-oiled machine.

An orchestra led by me, and subsequently, Sadie.

Bert leaves me then with a curt nod. After his footsteps fade, I’m left in the rehearsal studio alone, the weight in my chest heavy. I just served both our seats up on a platter to be cut. Fuck. At the peak of my career, this would be a blow to my reputation. For the start of Sadie’s, this could kill her chances before she even has a reputation. A reputation she doesn’t have because of what I did.

I tip my head back and sigh. There’s no way out of this and it’s then I realize I’m going to have to convince Sadie Love to… like me? Tolerate me? And I, her. For the sake of making it through this tour, of course.

A few sobering minutes later, whilst mulling over my options, I break through the rehearsal room doors.

Instantly, I stop in my tracks. A melody floats down the hall. Piercing, melodic, enthralling. My feet are moving towards it of its own volition until I’m before a practice room watching through the window.

Watching Sadie.

She stands before a music stand, eyes narrowed into slits as she squints at the notes she’s stumbling over in a difficult passage. Soon enough, I’m caught staring when her hazel eyes lock on mine through the glass.

She places her violin down and opens the door, lips twitching with annoyance or amusement, I can’t quite tell.

My gaze drops to where she bites at her lip and heat rushes to my cheeks. And my cock.

“Are you creeping on me, Tanner?” she asks.

I sober right up. The mouth on this girl. “It’s late. What are you still doing here?”

“Practicing. What are you still doing here?”

I roll my eyes. I can’t give her the proper answer, so I skip her question instead and head towards her music stand. Instantly, my brow bunches as I try to decipher the smattering of music markings all over the page. “Let me help you.”

Her jaw drops as her round honey-hazel eyes widen with surprise. She croaks out, “Excuse me?” but I’m already reaching for the pencil.

Her hand snaps forward just as mine wraps around the pencil. Smooth skin brushes mine momentarily until she lets out a surprised gasp and snatches her hand back, eyes avoiding mine as she blushes red as her hair.

I chuckle softly, my mouth quirked into a crooked smile. “Do I frighten you, Sass?”

Her nose bunches. “A little.”

My smile widens. “I won’t take that offensively.”

“You should. You’re quite frightening.”

I roll my eyes at her and turn back towards the music. “Try the passage like this.”

I make adjustments to her fingerings and bowings to match what I use for my solo. I’d perfected it after hours locked in a practice room, going over the same motif until I didn’t stumble over it anymore.

“I usually don’t share these kinds of things,” I murmur. “Consider this… a peace offering.”

I take several paces back, suddenly feeling the need to put as much space between us. Maybe I shouldn’t have barged in here and offered to help. Especially as Sadie stands speechless, brows furrowed in confusion.

“Why are you helping me?” she asks.

There are so many layers within me she unlocks with that question. Why am I helping? Because I’ve been a dick for the past two weeks. Because I don’t want either of us kicked off the tour. Because six years ago, I made a bad choice, and she’s paid the consequences.

“I’m… trying to apologize,” I stumble out.

Her head tilts, eyes regarding me as if trying to detect a joke. When she finds none, her lips quirk in a way I know means she’s up to something.

“What are you apologizing for?” she asks innocently, but it’s laced with a hint of mischief. “Are you apologizing… for being an ass?”

“Always one for words, aren’t you, Sass?”

“It’s Sadie ,” she corrects.

“Sass suits you better.”

She pins me with an even harder glare. It looks like she’s about ready to shove me out of the room.

“This isn’t really sounding like an apology, Tanner,” she says, arching a brow.

She’s right. It’s not. I seem to be struggling to get the words “I’m sorry” out, which is why I end up saying, “I have some pet peeves.”

“You’re my pet peeve,” she mutters loudly, fully intending for me to hear it.

“ Sass ,” I warn. But when I shoot her a glare, my heart leaps to my throat at the sight of her. Her arms lean back on the desk behind her in a way that accentuates her gorgeous body. Black sweater tucked into skinny jeans. Crimson red waves curling over round breasts. Hazel eyes staring right back at me.

She’s beautiful.

And she knows exactly what she’s doing and enjoying it.

“Am I your pet peeve?” she asks, fluttering her lashes playfully.

I swipe a hand down my face. “No. You are?— ”

“Oh! I know why you’re apologizing!” She leans forward, pushing off the table, and it makes her sweet scent waft over to me. “Is this because you berated me for how I marked your music?”

“No.”

“Is it because you kicked me in our stand?”

“Sass.”

“Did I offend you by opening my legs?”

I tip my head back and grind my teeth. Being stuck with this girl is going to drive me insane.

I’m not sure how either of us will find a way towards a truce like this. But maybe if I offer, she’d want to move stands herself? Bert wouldn’t be able to argue with that. So I muster out my last attempt at putting space between us.

“Do you want to be partnered with me?”

“What?” Her face slackened, all former amusement gone.

“I know I haven’t been the best partner. Do you want to switch stands?”

Her surprise transforms back into a challenge. Or a tease. “And lose my chance at a solo? Oh no. No, no, no, Tanner. I’m staying right where I was assigned.” She steps forward, index finger pointing at me. “Next to you .”

“Right.” I nod tightly.

“Tanner?” Her voice drips with a sweetness that feels like a trap, and my heart pulses in anticipation. “I still didn’t hear an apology. Do you need help with it?” She takes another step closer to me now as she runs her tongue over her bottom lip. “Here. Repeat after me.”

Oh, god.

“I’m sorry, Sadie...” She punctuates each word before gesturing for me to repeat it back to her.

I stare at her, unamused. “I’m sorry, Sass.”

“ Sadie ,” she grits.

I arch a brow, but she remains unperturbed and continues.

“I’m sorry for being a perfect and complete jackass who?—”

“Alright, that’s it.” I spin back towards the door.

“Hey!”

I flash her a smirk and her cheeks redden. “We need to get along, Sass. Three months together is a long time. Don’t burn me now.”

She looks at me with a fire in her eye. “I’m only just getting started, Tanner.”

And maybe it is a bad idea we’re both stuck like this, but I can’t deny even as I walk out the door of her practice room, that I haven’t felt this alive in years.

Six long years.