The Only Song (Only You)

19. Jaxon

Chapter 19

Jaxon

W e’ve made it to the last concert in Chicago, and my body is aching for a reprieve. I’ve sucked up sleeping on the couch to give Sadie her space, but I can’t say it hasn’t been making my shoulders and neck more sore. Not the best position for me with the injury I’m nursing. But after what happened with Smith, the last thing I want her to feel is me imposing on her.

Every night I lay on the couch and my back protests, I see her face in my mind. Tear-stained. Stricken. Defeated. It makes me want to swallow the desire to share the bed with her, listen to her soft, steady breaths, hold her hand until we fall asleep.

It’s not appropriate. It’s not professional.

She deserves space.

Still, I think it’s stupid that women can’t just go about their day without perverts trying to make dirty moves.

I should’ve punched Smith in the face.

I shake my head to clear my thoughts. Orchestra members filter out the backstage room as I clasp the locks on my violin case and push it to the side. My fingers reach for the large white box behind it. I waited to open it until after the concert so its contents wouldn’t attract anyone’s eye and it’s finally empty enough in the room for me to bring it out.

Using the handy Swiss-knife I bought in Switzerland on one of my first international tours, I swipe open the tape.

I can’t hold back my grin as I pull out the shiny silver violin case. It’s as mesmerizing as the day I bought it for myself. I kept it as my spare in my home in LA, but I couldn’t wait to pick it up from Xander and had him ship it to me instead so Sadie would have it for our next flights.

The way it shines reminds me of her. Effervescent. Radiating. Eye-capturing.

It’s okay if she doesn’t want to open up to me yet, but I can at least try and make her life easier in other ways. Make her smile. I’ll do anything to see her hazel eyes sparkle and those pretty lips tilt up for me.

I place it down beside my own. To my left, I can see Sadie’s violin atop her case, unpacked. It’s a beautiful, deep dark wood, almost black. Her bow matches it. But her case… looks beyond repair. Its edges are tattered, the black fabric torn up, the handle held together by duct tape and the metal clasps for the straps rusted and flaky.

I’m not going to watch Sadie struggle with that old case anymore.

A professional needs to take care of their instrument. And she is a professional. She deserves this.

I don’t know why I feel compelled to be the one to give it to her, but I do. I want her to have it. It was a favorite of mine and now it gets to be hers. If she’ll accept it. I hope she will.

Leaving our cases and violins backstage in safety, I break through the backstage doors into the lobby and immediately search for her. My eyes scanning quickly over other musicians mingling amongst the crowd and the masses of students grouped up with their school music teachers.

My heart begins to race at the thought that I might have missed her, but then out of the corner of my eye, I see her. Crimson red hair. Signature black bow. Tall and slender with curves I want to run my hands over.

Sadie .

But something looks wrong. Her shoulders are slumped, chin dipped down as she worries at her bottom lip and my heart tugs.

Why isn’t she happy? She did a stellar first concert weekend. She should be celebrating.

Musicians all around us are being handed flowers, but she’s standing with her hands wringing over her stomach like she’s being delivered the worst news and that’s when it hits me.

Across from her is a tall man with graying red hair and a thinner woman with pursed lips.

It doesn’t take a genius to guess who it is. Sadie’s parents.

I’m striding towards her before I can even think better of it. I don’t think about whether or not she’d want me there, but I’m not just going to stand here and watch after what she told me that one night.

I don’t want them to take more from me than they already have. If I see them, I know they’ll find a way to ruin this for me and I won’t be able to get them out of my head.

“You should’ve told us you weren’t in the first chair,” a snarky female voice quips. I freeze in my tracks. It feels like a whip and based on the way Sadie clenches her fist, I know it’s struck her. “It was disappointing to come all the way out here.”

“I told you not to come.” Sadie’s voice is strained. I want to reach out to her, pull her into me again and hide her from all these people trying to hurt her.

“How could you say that to us? We’re your parents,” her mother hisses. Her father gives a disapproving grunt, aimed at Sadie. They have no idea how this impacts her at all. But I do. “Why do you hate it when we give you advice?”

Sadie scoffs and her eyes finally snag up from the floor to clash with mine. Her lips part in surprise as we stare at each other across the space.

Her parents pivot, and once they track her gaze to land on me, their expressions transform. All sense of disappointment and disapproval evaporates as they beam up at me with delight and adoration. It’s sickening they didn’t have this reaction to their daughter.

“Oh, Jaxon!” her mother exclaims, bridging the space to come shake my hand enthusiastically. I force a smile on my face to not appear rude, but it hurts to see how they smile for me—not for her.

I look back at Sadie, distraught written all over her face. Her lips turned downward, hazel eyes dull in the light. Everything about her feels like she shines less and I see it now, why she never thought she could make it as a performer.

If she’s constantly getting put down, how could she believe she’s a light?

I take a step towards her but am immediately cut off.

“Jaxon. Your performance was astounding, as always. I was just telling Sadie she should’ve had a solo as well. It’s like we came all the way out here for nothing. But it’s fine because we love watching you perform.”

My eyes grip on Sadie’s. She’s blinking back a few tears and I can see her full bottom lip tremble. I remember how she told me it was her parent’s favorite pastime to compare her to me .

How unfair .

No one should grow up being constantly compared to anyone at all.

I choose my next words carefully, pushing down the anger rising in me to defend her. Because I don’t want to embarrass her, I want to empower her. “Sadie’s the most talented violinist I’ve ever met. And the best partner, too. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for her.”

Sadie’s eyes widen as her parents look at me confused, like they can’t comprehend how their daughter could have helped shape the musician in me. They have no idea she’s been my motivation since day one.

Sadie’s mom tuts. “Such a great leader. See, this is what I told you, Sadie.” She waves a hand over me. “Look at how professional he is. Nothing but nice things to say, whereas you tell us you don’t even want to see us.” She shakes her head and I can see Sadie’s face turn red. She looks… defeated even after I’ve tried to pick her up. And it’s what her mother says next that makes me realize why.

“You need to be just like Jaxon. Try harder, honey. You’re not trying hard enough.”

She exhales sharply as her shoulders tense. With one angry look at me, she runs towards the backstage entrance.

Because who wouldn’t want to burn the world down if they were told they aren’t good enough?