The Sound of Us

Chapter Twenty-Nine. “Set Fire to the Rain” by Adele

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

“Set Fire to the Rain” by Adele

SKYE

I was awoken the next morning by the scream of a siren and flashing red lights.

Bolting out of Dante’s bed, I ran to the window. He’d left two hours earlier for his morning class, insisting I stay and sleep after our wild night together, so I knew the emergency vehicle wasn’t for him. Still, my heart pounded as I pulled on my clothes and ran outside.

“Do you know this guy?” A paramedic waved me over to the back lane, where Noah was lying on a stretcher beside two turned-over recycling bins. His eyes were closed, and for a moment I thought he wasn’t breathing.

“Noah Cornell. He’s the station manager at WJPK radio. What happened? Is he okay?”

“He needs to take a trip to the hospital. Are you family…?”

“He’s my boss. I was just visiting his tenant who lives in the apartment above the garage. I’ll give him a call.”

“No.” Noah’s voice was barely a whisper. “Don’t call Dante.”

“He’ll be worried,” I said. “He would want to know.”

“No.” Noah shook his head again, so I let it go.

“Is there anything you need me to do before they take you to the hospital?” I asked as the paramedic hooked him up to an IV. “Do you need your phone or your wallet? Should I lock up your house?”

“Pets. Wallet. Keys.”

“I’ll be right back.” I went in the back door and was instantly greeted by three wet noses and wagging tails. Growing up, I’d had a Border Collie named Maya who had been my constant companion until she passed away when I was thirteen, and I was able to give them the assurance they needed given all the commotion outside. I checked their food and water and grabbed Noah’s belongings from the kitchen table along with the six bottles of pills on the counter in case he needed them.

By the time I was back outside, the paramedics were loading Noah into the ambulance. His eyes were half-closed, and he had a nasty gash on his forehead.

“Do you want me to come with you to the hospital?” I asked. “I can help with the insurance, call someone…”

Noah nodded. “Call my sister, Bella. And the pet sitter, Lisa. Where’s my phone?”

“I’ve got it.” The paramedic handed it to me as I climbed into the ambulance. “Good thing you had it on you and could call for help.”

Noah gave me the code and I called his sister and pet sitter as the ambulance raced through the streets.

“My idiot brother is supposed to be resting, not taking out the trash or going to work,” Bella grumbled over the phone after I told her the situation. “I told him this would happen if he pushed himself. I told him to take the treatment. But no. Stubborn ass wouldn’t do it. Tell him I’ll be there in a few hours.”

I relayed her message and gave Noah’s hand a squeeze. “What happened? Did you fall, or…”

“Pancreatic cancer.” He swallowed hard. “It’s terminal. It’s getting more challenging to manage.”

My breath left me in a rush. “Noah, I’m so sorry. Why didn’t you say anything? We could have done more to help you. All the meetings and the running around you’ve had to do…” And then it hit me—the reason he didn’t want me to call Dante.

“Dante doesn’t know, does he?”

“No, and you can’t tell him. He’s already lost too many people.”

I felt dizzy, my knees going weak, and I was glad for the bench they’d cleared for me to sit. “You can’t keep this from him, Noah. He’s going to wonder where you are.”

“Meetings.” He forced out the words as his eyes closed and his face twisted in a grimace. “Tell him I’m on a road trip.”

I stared at him aghast. “I can’t lie to him. Not about something like this.”

“I’m going to give you something for the pain,” the paramedic said to Noah. “It will knock you out for a bit. Is there anything else you need to tell her? Anyone else she needs to call?”

“Not Dante.” His words faded. “Not yet.”

With Noah’s wallet in hand, I was able to handle the insurance and paperwork. It was clear he’d been at the hospital many times and had made an impression on the staff because so many of them came to see him while I waited for his sister to arrive.

By midafternoon, Noah had adjusted to the pain medication and was able to sit up in bed. His first words after he woke were about Dante.

“Tell me you didn’t call.”

“I didn’t, but it’s not fair to keep this from him.” I had been tempted to call Dante anyway. I couldn’t imagine how he would feel if he found out Noah had been there for hours and no one had called to let him know.

“He’s not ready.”

“No one can be ready to hear something like this, especially if it’s someone they love.” I had no doubt about the depth of Dante’s feelings for Noah. It was clear from the way Dante talked about Noah that he was the father Dante never had.

“You don’t understand,” Noah said. “When I found him, he was living on the street with nothing but a piece of cardboard to sit on and his bass. I’d never met anyone so completely broken, and so alone. He was estranged from his father and grandmother, and he blamed himself for his sister’s death. He was just sitting there waiting to die.”

“He told me everything,” I said, in case he felt he couldn’t share. “Even about what his dad had done.”

“Bastard didn’t give a damn.” Noah’s face curdled. “He saw Dante fall apart and told him he was weak. It was only after Dante got his life back together and started university that his dad became interested in him again, and then only because he wanted Dante to take over the family business.”

“I’ve never met him, and I hate him already.” My hand curled into a fist. “I also hate the system that let him walk free. I’m glad you found Dante. You saved him.”

“Music saved him,” Noah said. “I would never have walked around that street corner but he was playing his bass and I could hear his pain—‘Candle in the Wind,’ ‘See You Again,’ ‘Fire and Rain,’ ‘Fast Car,’ ‘Dog Years’—but I also heard genius. It didn’t matter that it was coming from someone sitting in a filthy alley whose eyes said he was dead inside, because the music told me that there was still a tiny part of him that was fighting to survive.”

That was me. After the accident. When I blamed myself for my father’s death. When his last words were the embodiment of my biggest fear. When I was broken physically and emotionally and the doctors thought I would never walk, much less play ball again. But I had my mom and Jonah and Isla to pull me out of the darkness. Dante had been alone.

“I knew I had to help him,” Noah continued. “Not just because his musical talent needed to be shared with the world, but because someone did the same for me.” He reached for his phone and showed me a picture of an elderly man standing on a boat in the sunshine. “Dave Duncan.” Noah smiled at the picture. “He was the station manager at WJPK before me.”

“I saw his picture in your office.”

“I put it up there after he left so I would never forget what he did for me.” He tucked the phone away. “I found love when I was a young man traveling across the country with my guitar. Caroline was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen with the most beautiful voice I’d ever heard. It was love at first sight and we went on the road together until she got pregnant. We settled down with our little boy, Knox. We had six glorious months and then…” He let out a ragged breath. “We lost him.”

“I’m so sorry, Noah.”

“She never recovered,” he said. “One day I came home, and she was gone. She left a note telling me not to follow her. Every time she looked at me, she saw his face. She couldn’t take the pain.” A tear trickled down his cheek. “I tried to find her. Eventually, I gave up—not just the search, but everything. I was busking on a street corner when Dave found me and helped me get my life back on track, but I promised myself that one day I’d find her again. I told Dante that if he ever walked into the station and I was gone, that’s where I would be—back on the road, looking for Caroline.”

“That’s a hard way to leave someone.” I had been angry with my father, feared him, even resented him, but the shock of having him there one moment and gone the next was something I still hadn’t fully come to terms with.

“Better to leave him with the knowledge that I was following my heart rather than chasing shadows to my grave.”

“That’s very death metal of you,” I said.

Noah gave a weak laugh. “You remind me of Caroline. She loved music and people. She was curious and brave. But she couldn’t find her way out of those dark places. I worry that Dante won’t find his way out either. It’s why I’m still here. I couldn’t leave until I knew he had people to support him. But he’s got friends now. And he has you.”

I didn’t see any point in hiding the truth since he seemed to know already. “Yes, he has me. I’m sorry if we broke any of your rules. Dante said we had to fly under the radar because you wouldn’t approve, although I heard otherwise.”

“I don’t have rules about love,” Noah said, shaking his head. “The heart wants what the heart wants. But I know why he said that, and it was for a good reason, so don’t give him a hard time if it ever comes up.”

“If you know he’s got support, why not tell him the truth? We’ll be here for him. I’ll be here.”

“You don’t understand.” He curled his fist around the bed rail. “He’s got his LSAT this Friday. If he finds out I’m here, he’ll come to the hospital and he’ll sit on that chair and he won’t get up, not even to write that test. He’s been working toward that goal for three and a half years. I can’t be the reason he loses his dream. I don’t want him to resent me when I’m gone. I want him to have good memories to hold on to in the bad times, and there will be bad times because he wants to be a lawyer for the wrong reason. Revenge is nothing but a road to pain.”

Noah’s words resonated with me. I’d been on the wrong path, too. Basketball had been my father’s dream, not mine. But it wasn’t that easy to let go. I still kept up my training because I was afraid that if I stopped, I would have to admit I had failed my dad. Maybe it was the same for Dante. Maybe he couldn’t let his law dream go because then he would have to accept his dad would go unpunished.

“I’m pretty sure he would resent you more for not letting him be here for you than he would if he missed the chance to pursue a dream that you are so sure won’t make him happy.”

“I know it won’t make him happy.” Noah drew in a shuddering breath. “He’s not a lawyer, Skye. He doesn’t spend his free time at legal clinics or pouring over law cases. He spends it in the studio, or with his band. Music is in his blood. It fills his soul.”

“You fill his soul, too,” I said. “He loves you like a father. He needs to know you’re ill.”

Noah tugged on the wires attached to his chest. “A better solution is to get the hell out of here and then it won’t be an issue.”

“Noah. You complete idiot.” A short woman with flaming red hair and a bright-green coat walked into the room. “Get your hand off that wire. You’re not going anywhere. I go home for a few weeks, and this is what happens. I’m not letting you out of my sight again…” She trailed off when she saw me and her green eyes widened. “Who’s this? Your girlfriend?”

Noah threw back his head and laughed. “Christ, Bella. I know I’m hot but she’s thirty years younger than me. This is Skye. She works at the station. Skye, my sister, Bella.”

“You’re working?” Bella’s voice rose even higher. “For the love of God…”

“I have homework, so I’d better get going,” I said, not wanting to get in the middle of their family drama. “I need to stop by Dante’s place to get my stuff. I can also check on the dogs and take them for a quick walk if your pet sitter isn’t still around.”

“You’re a saint.” Noah tipped his head to the side “Please don’t tell Dante about this.”

I felt sick at the idea of keeping a secret from him, especially one of such magnitude. “I won’t lie to him, Noah. I can try and avoid him to buy you some time, but—”

“Give me one week,” Noah said. “There’s stuff I need to do first, and it won’t happen while I’m in a hospital bed.”

“One week. And then if you don’t tell him, I will.”

After taking care of Noah’s pets, I returned to Dante’s place to get my bag. I made the bed and took a few minutes to wander around, checking out the concert posters on the wall and Noah’s collection of vintage guitars. Music was everywhere, but I couldn’t see even a flicker of Dante’s personality reflected in the vast collection of memorabilia. Dante was a collector of experiences, not things. He felt music. He didn’t need replica hells bells or shrunken Iron Maiden heads to bring it to life.

After I tidied up the bedroom, I went to his desk to find a piece of paper to write a sexy note. I was flipping through the mess when I saw my name.

For the briefest second, I hesitated. I had no desire to look at his personal papers, but I couldn’t think of any reason why he would have a letter on Havencrest University letterhead with my name on it.

It only took me a few seconds to skim through the contents. Havencrest’s president had written to Dante to thank him for funding the WJPK journalism internship, and to let him know that the first recipient of his generous scholarship was me.

My breath left me in a rush, and I collapsed into the chair. I must have read it wrong. People who set up scholarships were rich. They didn’t live above a rundown garage in an apartment filled with someone else’s stuff. They didn’t wear worn jeans and frayed T-shirts and eat pizza off paper plates.

Hands shaking, I read the letter again and again in the hopes that it wasn’t really my name on the page. But no matter how many times I stared at it, my name stared right back. Bile rose in my throat and my vision blurred. My instinct had been right the day I’d packed up my bags to go home.

How could he do this to me?

Why did he lie?

My heart pounded so hard I could barely hear for the rush of blood in my ears. Noah had to be in on it, too. He’d just told me Dante had a reason for saying he wanted to keep our relationship under the radar—and that reason had to be the risk of someone finding out that the scholarship hadn’t gone to the best candidate. Dante had probably agreed to fund the internship to save the station on the condition Noah hire me. Quid pro quo. But why? For an easy hookup? A challenge? Was it all just a game?

I felt utterly ridiculous, remembering my total shock when Noah had called to offer me the job after my terrible broadcast; the day I’d overheard Dante tell him he didn’t want to supervise me; Dante’s hot and cold, and his insistence we keep our relationship secret. Sweat beaded on my forehead and I dropped my head to my hands. Who else knew? Were the friends I’d made at the station really my friends?

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

My ears rang with memories of my father’s words, his admonishments, his anger and disappointment. How could you miss that shot? Why weren’t you there to catch that throw? You are the greatest disappointment of my life.

I couldn’t breathe. There wasn’t enough oxygen in the room. I pushed the chair back, grabbed my bag, and ran out of the apartment.

I had always felt like I didn’t deserve Dante’s praise—great job on the copy, excellent piece, good girl…

Pulse racing, caught in a spiral of panic and humiliation, I retched into the garden, bringing everything up.

I’d fallen for him, utterly and completely. I’d bought the whole damn story, but everything was a lie.

My heart splintered into a thousand pieces.

In the end, my father was right. I was never going to be good enough.