To Defend A Bride (Entangled with the Enduar #3)

Chapter 22

Chapter 22

MELISA

NOTE: In this chapter, there is a serious trigger warning. When you see **, you will know it’s starting.The same symbol will show it is over.

E neko’s breath stinks of fermented grapes, and wine churns in my stomach. The lack of food was a mistake. It almost feels like my belly is trying to crawl up and nestle in my throat.

When we at last near the thick patch of trees that hides his home, I lose feeling in my hands. Invisible needles stab at my skin.

Enough. You’ve done this before.

When Eneko's hand slides down my back, I tense. His touch is rough and possessive. Ra'Sa's was gentle and careful.

I smile sweetly, blinking rapidly to erase that thought.

Eneko stands, swaying, and holds out his hand. Between our nights together, he couldn’t care less about me, but now his eyes watch with such care.

Each movement feels like someone else is puppeting my body. When I walk over to take his hand, it is warm—too warm—as he helps me down.

He smiles. "You're nervous again. It's been a long time since I've seen such shyness from you."

"I am sure I have no idea what you mean,” I respond.

He purses his lips. "You wish to play coy? Very well. Come. My wife has been crawling all over me for the past week. I require release."

He guides me to the cabin’s front door. Every sound is hauntingly familiar as we walk up the three steps and gaze into the dark home. Somewhere, Hibsej waits, and the boys sleep.

But I don't need to think of that right now. All I need to do is appear willing.

He stumbles around the table and past a few upholstered chairs as we move to the master bedroom in the back. I follow along—dutifully—as he casts me his greedy smile.

Just as we reach the master bedroom, one of the doors cracks open. Eneko is too drunk to notice, but I turn back to glimpse Hibsej. She glares at me.

I wish she would leave and spare herself from hearing this.

But she doesn't. She never does.

I let my gaze fall from her face as I am pulled inside. When the door shuts, the rest of the world goes quiet.

**Serious Trigger Warning Starting**

Eneko removes his coat before tugging his shirt over his head. Then comes his undershirt and the rest of his clothes. He stands before me naked and ready for servicing.

The giant stumbles over to the bed and sits down. I grab my headdress and give him a sly smile.

He grins and holds up his hand. "Wait."

I let go of the headdress.

"Dance for me."

Breathe. In and out.

“Yes, Eneko.”

His eyes blaze as I finally speak his name, which is only reserved for these four walls.

My dancing is decent enough. I can move my hands over my head in a graceful arc. Even stepping side to side comes naturally to me. When I take my headdress off, it’s with a flourish, followed by unbinding my hair.

He watches, mouth slightly agape, before he begins to touch himself. I look away, focusing on the task at hand. Slowly, I undo the front-facing laces of my dress. I make a show of pushing off the straps before I let the gown slide and fall to the ground.

Eneko grins as I stand before him in the thin nightgown I wear to these meetings.

If this were a regular night, he should tell me to stop here so he can splay me across the bed. But the seconds stretch on, and he doesn't.

Just continues to work himself frantically. Watching, lusting.

Panic claws through my mind. My throat closes, and my eyes burn.

Dear gods. Ra’Sa, please come for me.

Kill him.

Please.

But my thoughts belong to me alone. He can’t save me. No one can. So I cross the space between us.

When I reach over and place my hand atop the one he uses to touch himself, he smells of sweat and wine. He groans. Slowly, I lower my head. My mouth connects with salty flesh.

He grabs my hair and pulls me back. Then he surprises us both with his choked grunt as he comes.

I force myself to look at his eyes as it happens, trying to keep the disgust off my face.

He slumps back.

"I really did wait too long for you to return. We should've done this the night you turned up.”

"Yes, Eneko," I say softly.

He adjusts himself on the bed.

"Sit—wih me," he slurs.

I do, gently brushing the hair out of his enormous face.

"The king wants me to leave," he blurts out as he often does.

I continue stroking despite my shock. The Enduar King wanted me to find out if there is tension within the giants, and he wants to know if Rholker will attack him.

"He'd take you away from me?”

“Rholker doesn’t like his new advisor,” the giant breathes.

“I don’t know much about Regent Uvog.”

Eneko closes his eyes. “Regent Uvog is dead. Lord Fektir has taken his place.”

I recognize the name. It’s Queen Marej’s father. He owns most of the northern yards.

“That’s awful for the regent,” I continue.

“It’s a fucking shame,” Eneko says. “And now, I have to go to the Ogre Swamps to visit some mine. Hibsej will be furious. She’s going to nag me from the second my eyes open.”

I let him speak, waiting for him to pause before I ask, “Why the mines? To retrieve tools for the lumber yards?”

He shakes his head. “No, there’s something valuable there. Something the Elf King cares about.”

The Elf King. Gods.

“The elves look at us like we are brutes. I don’t care for the new king, but Rholker insists he needs the alliance. If I were king, I’d kill them all, alongside those damned trolls. We giants don’t need allies, we need to expand.”

The words tumble out of him, and I try to breathe evenly.

“What’s wrong?” he asks.

My shoulders tense and shivers run over my arms. “Forgive me, Eneko. I am merely sad to see you leave again. Especially so soon after we were reunited.”

He sighs. "I cannot bring you. I already asked."

I relax. "I will miss you. May I ask how long you will be gone for?"

He grunts. "Two weeks. And I leave soon."

"How soon is soon?"

"In the morning," he says.

I force myself to stroke up his arm. "That is soon."

He nods under my hand. "Killing your people isn't enough, you know. The others, they are too stubborn—don't accept their fate. Not like you. You are the best of them."

Silence, and then he whispers, “I missed you.”

I listen to the words, humming my agreement as I pet him like a dog.

"You are a kind foreman. You think of your men. It is a shame they do not return your favor."

Like this, stripped of his pomp, I hate him more. I hate his weakness. If the world saw him now, they would see him for the pathetic, leashed pup that he is.

"Stay until I fall asleep," he says, wrapping his arm around me and pulling me close. "I promise to give you a proper rut when I return."

Godsdamnit. I need to get out of here.

I say nothing; I just lay next to him, tracing his arms and giving him the comfort he needs to sleep. Once he begins to snore, I extricate myself from him and push away.

**End of Trigger Warning**

I grab my clothing, deciding to wrap my cloak around me instead of getting fully dressed. I can survive the short walk to my room. Only then do I notice some of his seed on my clothing and flinch.

Grabbing the area of fabric between my thumb and finger, I hold it off my skin.

With one hand pressed to my mouth, I rub it against one of the chairs. I close my eyes, trying to breathe deeply, and slip away.

Even after it’s wiped off, the feel of it clings to my skin. It lingers like a ghost when the damp fabric brushes over my belly.

When I touch the door handle, my hands burn from what I’ve done. I see Eneko’s face over and over, wanting me.

If I could peel away the areas of me he touched, I would.

I hurry out of the damned room and start to run. When I leave the cabin, the cold air lambasts my burning skin.

Kneeling, I grab a handful of snow and press it to my feverish cheeks. It burns, but then the sharp pain is replaced with… nothing.

Numbness.

I use the gritty powder to scrub my mouth clean of Eneko. I rub until my lips and tongue feel raw.

Only then do I stand and walk to the backyard.

My room is unlocked. A fire is already burning, too.

Taking a deep breath, I enter and find Hibsej sitting on my bed with a knife.

She looks at me with tired, hate-filled eyes. "Finished so soon?"

I open my mouth. "My Lady, I?—”

"Shut the fuck up." She holds out her hand, reaching for my arm.

I let it fall out of the cloak, revealing my shift. She grabs my hand, jostling me all the way to the shoulder, and pushes my sleeve up. Dozens of cuts are exposed.

Notches. A reminder of every time I touched her bed.

Sometimes, it's a quick slice, only lasting for a few days. Other times, it’s deep. It burns and refuses to heal for weeks on end. I almost cried the first time she did it, but it's been a long time since I cried over something so trivial.

When she pulls out her knife—a regular kitchen knife she brought from inside—I look the other way. The sharp sting causes a hiss to push past my lips. Instead of fading into a dull ache, it intensifies.

Forcing myself to look, I see the wound spans the entire circumference of my arm. She still holds the knife to my skin. My mouth parts in horror, but she looks at me with such fierce disgust.

"For a week, I had my family all to myself. You shouldn't have come back," she sneers.

I meet her eyes, enduring the pain. “My Lady, please?—”

“Speak plainly. I’m no lady, and I tire of your pandering.”

For a minute, I am silent.

“You know that if I hadn't returned, he would've found someone else."

She shakes her head, but I see the shine along her waterline. "Before he saw you, he never wanted anyone else."

Pity flourishes in my chest, like a drop of ink spreading through water. Another drop is added. And soon, it’s too murky to see.

"Hibsej…" I say softly.

For whatever reason, the sound of her name coming from my mouth makes her remove the knife from my skin. I ignore the burn and how the blood feels running down my arm. I pretend not to hear how it drips onto the floor.

“Eneko built this room before he ever knew I existed. If it hadn't been me, it would've been someone else. He's told me that children ruined your body.”

The irony of that statement has always struck me as unsettling. Although she and I have had the same number of children, Eneko can’t tell because of our size difference.

It makes me sick.

As I’m lost in my thoughts, Hibsej inhales sharply.

"But they were his children who hurt me. I did it for him,” she murmurs.

Hibsej is complex. She’s cruel and sharp, but sometimes… I think I’m the only person she can talk to.

I can't bring myself to hate her. Not when I've seen how she’s treated, pitted against me, and always— always —given the short end of the stick. In a way, I envy her. She cares for her sons in a way I wish I could care for Wren and Thea.

"I know,” I say.

Her look of surprise is filled with hatred. "Why?"

The question isn't for me. She gave Eneko so much. Her body, her time, her talents. She gave him strong sons.

Why does he betray her?

"Because he doesn't deserve you," I say at last.

She purses her lips as the tears well in her eyes. “I hate him.”

I nod. "I know.”

She stands, and I still see the conflicting emotions war across her features. "I don't need your pity."

Right now, she isn’t just my master’s wife, she’s a fellow person. Someone I know very well.

“And yet, I feel it all the same.”

She brushes out of the room, knocking a bucket of water on the fire she'd lit, and ensuring it won't be dry enough to heat my room tonight.