To Defend A Bride (Entangled with the Enduar #3)

Chapter 24

Chapter 24

MELISA

I pull off my nightgown and use it to staunch the wound on my arm as I look for another dress to wear to meet Ra'Sa. Judging by the moon’s course in the sky, he might already be waiting for me. The smell of blood fills my nose, giving me a light headache.

At least the gash on my ribs doesn’t hurt so much.

Estela once told me elm tree sap can help with wound healing. There’s one near my room. At the very least, I imagine it should help stave off infection.

Reaching for a chilled bucket of water, I wash my skin and then pull on a new dress. My body warms in mere moments, and I am grateful for the change of temperature.

As I walk out of the house, I continue to think of Estela. She'd shown me friendship when I let very few see me. Not Hibsej, not most of the other comfort women. She was like Seranya, in that regard.

The memories of two women, both important to me for very different reasons, comfort me as I cross the backyard. Pausing at the start of the trees, the deep night presses against my skin and the backs of my eyelids as I sigh. Then I push deeper, looking for the tree.

Its silver and brown stripes stand out against the pines. Pockets of sap are scattered up and down the trunk, and I pop a few, coating my fingers in the sticky substance while holding up my arm to inspect the wound. In the dim light, I see some of the blood has started to clot, but the wound is hot and tender.

I hiss as I smear the sap over it.

A branch cracks from behind the tree. Out steps Ra'Sa. A light flickers dimly in the center of his chest, almost like the flicker of a pixie.

“You’re hurt again,” Ra’Sa says.

His Fuegorra mixes with the moonlight, illuminating his features. Harsh lines bracket his mouth and tense between his eyebrows. He looks like he would burn down the entire forest.

But those eyes are blue, like the open skies. Panic flares up inside me, compounded by my shitty night.

"What the hell are you doing? Where’s your glamour?”

“Midnight passed—don’t worry, no one will find us. Now tell me what happened?" he demands, pulling me into the shadows of the trees.

We walk away from the cabin, away from the slave pens, until I can’t see any signs of Zlosa. Ra’Sa presses himself against a rough tree trunk, encasing me with his body as he looks at the wound. The gem in his chest glows brighter.

I panic more, placing my other hand over the glow, trying to hide it.

"Let me go, and turn that off," I whisper.

His head snaps up, but his fingers continue to gently cradle my injured arm. Blood weeps from the slash, staining his blue skin.

“Did Eneko do this?”

My anger fades at the look in his eye. It's too intense, too consuming. I spent my time with Eneko wishing he were Ra’Sa and now… now I'm here.

Heart galloping, arm stinging, and lungs constricting. I'd rather be anywhere else than seeing his face when he realizes where I've been.

“No. It's payment to his wife," I say softly.

His eyebrows draw together. "What does that mean?"

I worry my lower lip. If I tell him, he will be disgusted. Disappointed. He might even leave. Men only defend that which they think they’ve conquered. It's just how they are—territorial, cruel, jealous.

That’s why heroes are dangerous. They deluded themselves into believing such behavior is honorable because they are the ones doing it.

My actions are not noble. They rarely have been. Even when I longed for the Enduar before me, it was out of selfishness, not love. I doubt I can even love like a proper person.

I’m merely a smiling viper who broke her own rules and allowed herself to... feel.

“Melisa, I know you were with Eneko. What happened?”

His blue eyes pierce me from the depths of my soul, but I stare back, fearless as the jaws of ruin open wide. One last breath pushes past my lips.

The waking nightmare comes swiftly. My heart beats at a frantic pace, and my palms start to sweat as the tips of my fingers turn numb. I try taking the deepest breaths possible, but the air simply refuses to enter my lungs.

This cursed man's arms wrap around me, pulling me off the tree and then holding me as close to his chest as possible.

"No," I choke.

He shouldn't touch me. I can't be the kind of person who is touched by one man and then another. I can't do this to Ra'Sa.

"Shh, I am here," he says. "I know how to help you through this, remember?"

A choked sob breaks out as I stand there, weak and defenseless against his kindness. "You don't know, Ra'Sa."

“Tell me what you needed to pay her for?" he murmurs.

I shake my head.

Just do it . He came with you to get information, nothing more. This is all a part of the mission.

I pull away from the Enduar. The perfect man with a kind soul and a smile that lights up the heavens looks at me with such tender concern I simply don't deserve.

I take my other arm and pull back the sleeves, revealing the hundreds of scars across my arms. They are so rarely on display.

“You’re right. I was with him , but Hibsej met me after. This is payment for laying with her husband," I spit out.

As the words leave my mouth, my head buzzes. I feel as though I am watching this exchange happen from the top of some tree.

I take another step back when Ra'Sa's bright blue eyes drop from my face to my arms. His large hand reaches up and wraps around one of my wrists, brushing against some of the deep scars that had been dangerously deep when they were made.

He soaks in the years of wounds.

"The long sleeves,” he murmurs, more to himself. “I thought that you only wore them for winter."

I don't respond.

He gives me the same look he did while we were traveling. Memories of his arms wrapped around me turn. He held me close while my attack raged. Cherished me. Whispered sweet words.

“Why are you still here?” I demand.

“Because I don’t care about where you were—I care about you.”

I laugh bitterly into his chest. “You don’t know what I did. I used the same hand you now hold. I put my mouth on his cock. If we are being honest, I got lucky he didn’t demand more tonight. I won't be next time. Will you hold me then?”

The sex would be awful, like it had been the first few months. But being held after? How could I live with myself?

Ra’Sa remains silent, and the absolute absence of sound drives me crazy. I try to pull away, but he refuses to let me go.

“Again, this is what I am, Ra'Sa,” I say into his chest.

I expect him to finally drop my hand, to let me go, but he still doesn’t. So I tear away.

"Melisa, I want to be with you,” he says softly and steps toward me. "It's all right."

"All right? You are good. You want a family, and children to carry your bloodline, and a mate . I-I’m a leech—latching onto people who can secure my future. That's the whole reason you and I know each other!”

He shakes his head. "You're wrong."

I look at him, tears falling down my cheeks.

Tonight wasn't supposed to be like this; we were supposed to send a message to Estela. I wasn't supposed to tell him any of this, but he was so damned gentle. So kind.

I wanted to be comforted, not to comfort, for once in my godsdamned life.

“I’m a whore, Ra’Sa. Take my information, and leave me to my shame,” I spit at him.

The moonlight bathes him with such noble, beautiful colors. It makes my chest hurt. He must be young and stupid to approach me so swiftly, knowing that the woman he pursues is... me.

“While you were with him, there came a moment when you felt a waking nightmare creep up, wasn’t there?” he asks, voice low.

I don’t understand how he could know that.

“What?”

“While you were with him. You said, ‘Ra’Sa, please come for me’.”

Shit.

“I—I did,” I whisper as he approaches.

He is devastatingly beautiful, like some fallen god. He looks at me with the light chiseling out his features. There's no humor in his face.

I have never seen anything like this.

It puts me wholly at his mercy. I’m exposed.

Ra’Sa nods once. “I know—I heard it.”

“What the fuck do you mean?”

Melisa, I can speak to your mind, which means I am your mate.

A tentative smile crosses his face as my mouth parts. He looks at me like I hold the key to hope itself.

All the humans wanted this except me. They wanted perfect lives with pastimes and gardens and pretty jewels.

I just wanted safety.

“No.”