Troubled (The Binding Chronicles #4)

39. Death Waited in the Wings

Death Waited in the Wings

V ivienne was floating.

Everything around her was dark and empty.

Shadows didn’t exist in this space because light was a foreign concept. There were no stars. No moon. Nothing at all, except her.

She was weightless, and nothing was right.

She couldn’t see anything, but when she tried to open her eyes, nothing happened. It was as if her body had forgotten it was attached to her mind. She couldn’t feel her fingers, her toes, or even the burning pain that had been devouring her from the inside out earlier.

She just... was.

How long had she been here? It felt like minutes, but it could have been decades or centuries.

Time had no meaning in this place, wherever it was.

Would this emptiness be her home for the rest of eternity? She’d always assumed that if she ever met her final death, life would just... end.

Maybe she’d been wrong .

Maybe this was it.

She didn’t feel dead, though. She didn’t feel anything at all.

Vivienne didn’t know how long she floated through the nothingness of this space that was like the Void, but not. Nothing seemed to matter at all until something pierced through the darkness of the space where she currently resided.

At first, it was nothing more than a silver spark.

There one moment, gone the next.

Was it a figment of her imagination?

Sometime later, it happened again. Silver flashed, bursting through the darkness like an exploding star before it disappeared.

This time, she was sure it was real.

It happened again.

And again.

Each time, the flash of silver was brighter and remained longer before vanishing.

Something deep within her stirred. The strange flashes called to her, speaking to a part of her that didn’t quite make sense.

More silver appeared. The tiny tendrils of bright light multiplied. Soon, this place that wasn’t a place was more silver than black.

And then she heard it. A faint, barely audible murmur broke through the darkness. It was as if she was deep underwater. She could barely hear them, but the sound reverberated through her soul.

“Viv?” The voice faded in and out. “Come back.”

Her heart ached at the sound, and for the first time since she entered this strange place, she felt .

She didn’t quite understand what they were saying, though. Come back? Where was she?

“Please... need... ”

The voice was growing fainter, and the silver ribbons were disappearing again.

Something within Vivienne screamed, and she knew that if they left, they’d never return. She’d be stuck in this place of darkness forever.

Somehow, that hurt more than everything else she’d experienced so far.

She strained for the light, wishing she understood how to move in this place.

“Vivienne.” Again, that voice called for her. “Please...”

She didn’t know how she did it. She wasn’t sure whether it was through pure will, strange magic, or something else entirely, but it didn’t matter. Not really. All that mattered was that one moment, she was in that weightless, nothing place, and the next, she wasn’t.

Silver light engulfed her, caressing and embracing her, and then, it vanished.

For one long moment, there was nothing but blackness.

And then, there was pain.

Oh, gods.

It was everywhere. Her head pounded against the confines of her skull. Her limbs were made of lead and unable to move. Her chest was on fire, burning, burning, burning.

Breathing in was like inhaling shards of sunlight, and her lungs felt like they were moments away from bursting into flames. Every beat of her heart was like a dagger piercing her chest.

Nothing was good. Nothing was easy.

Why had she come back? In the emptiness, she had felt nothing.

That was better than this.

If this was life, she didn’t want it. She didn’t want to be caught in this painful existence, alive only to feel the utter agony coursing through her. Aches and pains had nothing on this .

It was as though she’d ingested silver, and now the deadly compound ran through her veins in the place of darkness.

Even thinking hurt.

A low moan crawled up her scratchy throat. The rough sound was wrong. All of this was wrong.

What had she done to deserve this? A sharp inhale came from beside her, and fingers brushed her cheek. The touch was gentle, but Vivienne couldn’t stop herself from wincing. Her skin was on fire, and every touch was too much.

The emptiness from before had been a mercy. A reprieve.

This was torture. Recompense for the lives she’d taken as a soldier. Retribution for her failures. Punishment for her sins.

This was hell.

“Can you hear me, Viv?” The words were a pained whisper. “I’m sorry. I’m so gods-damned sorry.”

Wetness fell on her cheeks like raindrops from above, a cooling balm to the inferno roaring beneath her skin. She shifted her head towards the salty rain.

“Open your eyes,” the familiar voice murmured. “Please.”

Why did that last word tug on her heart so much? Why did it have her fighting to open her eyes even though the movement sent searing pain racing through her? Why did she?—

Her breath escaped her on a ragged exhale as brown eyes met hers.

Worry lines creased Marius’s forehead, and tears streaked down his cheeks. Black blood was spattered across his nose and chin, but he didn’t seem to notice. The worry-free man she’d come to know was gone, and someone deeply troubled was in his place.

“It hurts,” she whispered, the two words the first ones that came to mind.

She hated admitting to the pain, hated that she wasn’t the strong one right now, but she couldn’t get her mind off the agony coursing through her.

“I know.” More tears ran down his cheeks. Had she ever seen him cry before? “They gave you some strong medicine to wake you up, but I’m afraid it won’t last long.”

She didn’t need to be a healer to know he spoke the truth. Fire raged in her chest, and death waited in the wings.

Her gaze crawled past the prince. The king and queen stood against the wall with a team of healers and witches that she vaguely recognized.

“Why?” The word burned its way up her throat, leaving her on a gasp.

Why wake me up?

Why bring me back?

Why do any of this?

The question seemed to pain him almost as much as it did her.

He cupped her cheek and leaned closer. “The First... those creatures she Made weren’t normal. And they... they hurt you.”

Not just her. Flashes of a bloody forest went through Vivienne’s mind.

Her chest tightened. “Are they...”

“Dead, all of them,” Marius said, his eyes never leaving hers. He was perched beside her.

She was on a four-poster bed, she realized. Someone had ripped off her bloody outer garments, and bandages were loosely wrapped around her stomach.

They didn’t stop the burning.

“You did it.” Pride warmed her heart, a momentary reprieve from the fire.

He nodded, giving her a watery smile. “I killed the First with the dagger, and the rest of them died instantly. ”

“Good,” she breathed. “That’s good.”

At least Marius was safe. Even though she’d be gone soon, even though this pain would surely devour her from the inside out, he’d be safe with his sister and brother-in-law.

Her eyes grew heavy, and somewhere nearby, death smiled.

It wouldn’t be long, now.

“Marius, I—” she started at the same time that he said, “Bind yourself to me, Vivienne.”

They both paused and stared at each other.

“What?” She could barely force the words out of her mouth. She must’ve misheard him.

“Bind yourself to me,” the prince repeated. “I love you, and I don’t want you to die.” His words came faster as if he knew they were ludicrous. “The healers don’t think that regular blood will be enough to save you, but if you’re Bound to me, if I’m your Source, and we’re tied together, it should be enough.”

She blinked up at him, her brows furrowed. Pain was clouding her mind and making her mishear him. Right? There was no way he said what she thought he said.

Still, she had to check.

“You… love me?” she asked.

“I do. I think I fell in love with you the moment you killed someone for me.” His lips creaked up, and he repeated, “I love you so much, Vivienne Beaumont. You stole my heart, and I don’t want it back.”

She never thought she’d hear those three words directed at her, especially not on her deathbed coming from the prince of the realm.

Despite the pain and agony coursing through her, she smiled back at him. She’d been an utter fool, falling in love with the man she’d vowed to protect... but he loved her back .

If she’d stolen his heart, he’d wormed his way into hers. He saw her darkness, and he didn’t turn and run the other way.

He loved her.

Somehow, that made everything not hurt as much.

“I love you, too,” she whispered, the words taking an eternity to make it out of her sore throat.

Their audience didn’t matter. Not really. The only thing that mattered was the man in front of her.

He bit his lip and kissed the back of her hand. “So, what do you say? Will you Bind yourself to me?”

She stared at him. “A Binding is... forever .”

An eternity together.

“I know,” he murmured, sweeping his thumb over her cheek. “There’s no one I’d rather spend my life with.”

“You would do this for me?” she whispered. “I don’t want you to regret this.”

She didn’t want him to regret her.

Bindings, like Tetherings, could not be undone. They lasted as long as the stronger partner was alive. There would be no going back, no deciding in a day or a year or a century from now that he no longer wanted this. No longer wanted her.

His eyes softened, and he bent, brushing his lips over hers. The kiss was feather-light, but it reverberated through her entire being.

“Never,” he vowed, his voice deepening. “I would sooner chain myself to this castle and swear never to leave its four walls before I regret you.”

She searched his eyes for any sign of a lie, but there was none.

Despite the agony she was in, Vivienne’s heart soared at the declaration. “Okay,” she breathed. “I’ll do it.”

A mountain of pillows supported Vivienne’s back as she sat up in bed. Before leaving, the healers had given her a potion that tasted like bitter ash mixed with blood, but it had healed the wounds in her stomach enough so that she could move.

Marius stood on Vivienne’s left, his fingers laced with hers. A white bandage was wrapped around his arm, but he didn’t notice it. He had taken her hand the moment she’d agreed to the Binding and hadn’t let go since.

She wasn’t ashamed to say that she was grateful for the support. When the healers had given her the medicine, the pain in her chest had dulled to a steady throb, but the burning was still there. She could feel death waiting in the wings, bidding its time.

King Sebastian and Queen Luna stood in front of the bed, wearing dual expressions of worry.

“You’re sure about this, Marius?” The king’s gaze was dark as it traveled first to Vivienne, then to the prince beside her.

“Yes.” Marius squeezed Vivienne’s hand. “There’s no one I’d rather Bind myself to.”

The queen exchanged a look with her husband before dipping her head.

“Alright. We trust you.” She smiled at Vivienne and came to stand beside her brother. “You must be very special, and I can’t wait to get to know you more in the coming years.”

Acceptance, just like that. No wonder Marius loved his sister so much.

Vivienne’s heart warmed, and she nodded. “Thank you, Your Majesty. I look forward to it.”

The queen tsk’d. “None of that. You might not be marrying my brother, but you’re about to Bind yourself to him. You’ll be around for a long time. Call us by our given names, please.”

That would take some getting used to.

“Alright, I will.” Vivienne shifted on the pillows, hissing as the fire expanded in her chest.

Marius noticed immediately. Of course, he did.

“We need to do this now,” he said seriously. The jovial prince was nowhere in sight as he focused on her. “Hold on, Viv. I know it hurts, but it’ll be over soon.”

Even though pain filled her so completely, she trusted him.

“Okay,” she whispered.

The king—Sebastian—retrieved a golden chalice from a nearby table. A servant had brought it earlier. “You both agree to this Binding, correct?”

He waited until they verbally consented before crossing over to the bed.

“A priest would usually perform the Binding, but since we don’t want to risk a repeat of what happened to me and Luna, I’d like to conduct the ceremony. Is that alright with you?”

A Binding performed by the king himself. Whoever would’ve guessed?

“It’s fine,” Vivienne rasped.

The prince squeezed her fingers. “I don’t care. Just hurry.”

He helped Vivienne lift her good arm to her mouth, waiting as she pierced her tender flesh with her fangs. There was a flash of sharp, piercing pain before the coppery tang of blood filled her mouth.

Sebastian was there with the chalice the moment she pulled her arm from her mouth, and he caught her blood.

“This is familiar,” Luna commented, the hint of a smile dancing across her face .

“Very,” the king replied when the cup was half-full. “There won’t be any surprise Tetherings, though.”

“Thank Isvana,” his wife murmured.

Marius handed Vivienne a cloth bandage as the king moved the chalice away from her arm. The prince’s thoughtfulness warmed Vivienne’s heart. Usually, her skin would heal on its own, but with all the damage the creatures had done to her, this was needed.

Pressing the cloth against her wrist, she leaned against the pillows. Even the small act of biting her wrist had taken far too much energy. Keeping her eyes open was the most strenuous of tasks, and yet, she refused to look away as the prince produced a dagger—not the obsidian blade—and pressed the tip against the soft skin of his right forearm.

The scent of his blood hit the air, and her fangs pulsed. Even now, on the brink of death, the darkness within her wanted to drink from him.

But that would have to wait.

Once the chalice was full, Marius bandaged his wound before reclaiming his seat on the side of the bed.

The king took the chalice and began to chant. He spoke in Isvana’s ancient tongue, asking the goddess of the moon to bless their blood and the Binding.

Soon, the prayer ended.

“It’s time.” The king turned to them. “Who would like to go first?”

Vivienne had thought that when the time came to Bind herself to the prince, she’d be nervous, but a sense of absolute calm washed over her instead.

She whispered, “Me.”

She was ready for this. There was no one else she’d rather be Bound to. She loved Marius with all her heart, and what better way was there to show him than by doing this ?

Sebastian handed Marius the chalice. The prince shifted, smiling as he lifted the cup to her lips.

“Open up,” he murmured.

She parted her lips instinctively, keeping her eyes locked on his as he tipped the cup.

The moment the crimson liquid hit her tongue, Vivienne barely bit back a groan. She’d tasted Marius’s blood before, but that had nothing on this. His blood tasted of maple and amber, just like his scent, but it was more . Deeper. And now it was mingling with hers, creating a distinct flavor that she never could’ve imagined, even in her wildest dreams.

She drank and drank.

The fire went from a dull roar to a quiet hum; her darkness sang, and every single part of her felt like it was floating.

When the chalice was half-empty, Marius pulled it from her lips. His gaze never left hers, even as he lifted the cup and drank without hesitation. His throat bobbed as he swallowed their blood, drinking until every last drop was gone.

The tang of magic filled the air as Sebastian began to pray again.

Vivienne could feel her body healing, pulling strength from her new Bound Partner. Wounds stitched themselves together, skin formed where it had been torn, her pulse slowed and returned to normal, and the fire that had been threatening to consume her vanished.

And when black bands appeared on their wrists, intricate swirling bracelets that indicated their bonding to everyone, Vivienne smiled.

She’d never seen this coming, but now that it was here, she couldn’t imagine her life any other way.

Two had become one.

Bound together through eternity.

Never to come undone .

And her heart soared as a deep sense happiness unlike anything she’d ever felt, filled her body, mind, and soul.