Unfettered Vampire (Found & Freed: The Unfettered #5)

5. Chapter 5

Chapter five

Ned

One year later

“ N ed, wake up!”

Lello’s voice lances through my brain.

“Wake up! Wake up!”

I groan and roll over. “You have a mate to pester now. You can leave me alone.”

“He has gone out with Brodie to find parts for the pool pump, and I want to make cookies with my BFF!”

“I’m not your BFF,” I grumble into my pillow even though it is pointless. Lello decided in the harem that I was, explained what it meant, and that’s been the end of that. I’ve literally never had any say in the matter.

“Yes you are, silly billy. Come on, up, up. You don’t want to waste your day off, do you?”

I turn my head and open one bleary eye to glare at the annoying little kelpie and to tell him in no uncertain terms that spending the day in bed is the perfect way to spend my day off, but as soon as his bright blue eyes and beaming grin come into focus, the words wither on my lips.

“Fine,” I sigh heavily.

Lello squeals in excitement, and it is hard to fight my own grin. Being a soft bastard is one thing, being blatant about it is quite another.

I roll out of bed, throw my robe on and follow Lello down to the kitchen. He skips ahead of me and starts pulling the blinds down, even though the autumn sky is cloudy and not too bright.

“Good morning Pink, Good Morning Jade,” he all but sings as he yanks on the blind cords with far more force than is necessary.

The two poor sods look up from their cups of coffee with half-awake expressions. Like deer in the headlights. I know the feeling.

I sigh. “Lello, why don’t you go hang out with Gray, while us old farts have coffee and wake up?”

Not that Pink or Jade are old like me, but they have definitely been cured of the exuberance of youth. Unlike Lello.

The kelpie whirls to face me. “Good idea! He gets up every morning to watch the sunrise. He is not a lazy sleepy head like you guys!”

He dances off while singing softly. Presumably in search of the demon.

I stagger over to the coffee machine. Thank heavens for small mercies.

Behind me, Jade huffs out a sigh of relief. “I love Lello, but he is too much in the morning.”

Pink chuckles in agreement. “I’ll always be in awe of him for being so cheerful, even in the harem. I don’t know how he did it.”

My chest tightens painfully. Pink had been the very opposite of cheerful during our slavery. He had given up. I’ll never forget the look in his eyes the moment he decided to sacrifice himself to save us all. I owe him a debt that can never be repaid. And I don’t even know how to express it.

So I do what I always do. Ignore it. Pretend it doesn’t exist. Just like my feelings for Morgan.

I tighten my grip on my coffee cup as the all too familiar waves of emotion wash over me. Longing. Pining. Regret. I’m such a sappy bastard. It’s pathetic. This crush has gone on long enough, it is high time to be rid of it.

Ever since that night I freaked out, Morgan has been nothing but pleasantly professional. It is clear I burned my bridges there.

Sometimes I catch a glimmer in his eye, but that is probably my imagination. Or simply plain old lust. It feels big-headed to admit it, but I am good looking. Attractive enough that Ritchie wanted me for his harem.

And when I look at the others, it is clear that the sicko had high standards. Hells, even my nightmare of a maker was drawn to my looks. The sick fucker wanted a cute boy to fuck for all eternity.

So, all in all, it is hardly surprising that Morgan sometimes desires my body. But I’m so tired of it. I don’t want to be an object of lust anymore. I want to be loved. Yet here I am, stuck looking like this for all eternity. All because I had the shitty luck to cross paths with a vampire in the precise year that genetics and the flush of youth conspired to make me highly desirable .

Now I’ll never get to be the withered, tired old man that I feel I am inside.

I sit down at the table with Jade and Pink. Hells, I’m in a whiny mood today. If I could make feeling sorry for myself an Olympic sport, I’d win a gold medal.

As I bring my coffee cup to my lips, a cold shiver runs over me. An icy feeling that creeps over my body. Ah ha. That’s it. That’s what is wrong with me. I need to feed. Being hungry always makes me moody.

I guess I should be happy with the good timing. It is my day off. Which means slipping off to feed is not going to be a problem. I just need to hit someone up on Grindr. Glamor them. Feed. Then run away, leaving them feeling dazed and incredibly horny. But hey, they have Grindr, so I’m not going to feel bad about that.

I hear Red’s footsteps a few moments before the kitchen door flings open, but I still jump to my feet. Red’s hair is all over the place and there is a frantic look in his eyes. He is clutching one of the cushions from the living room to his chest.

“You alright, Red?” I ask.

He nods distractedly, walks right up to me, and sniffs my shoulder. His fingers trace lightly over my robe.

“Fluffy,” he murmurs.

I look at Pink and Jade for help, but they just stare back at me. With very carefully blank expressions. I think they know something, but for some reason they aren’t sharing. Well, screw them.

“Can I have it?” asks Red.

“My robe?”

He nods feverishly .

What the hell is going on? I have pajamas on, and it is not like I really feel the cold anyway. So I shrug out of my velvet housecoat and hand it to Red.

He all but snatches it from me. Then he turns and runs out of the kitchen.

I stare in utter bemusement at the empty spot where he was just standing.

“He is nesting,” whispers Pink.

Oh. Oh shit. Suddenly everything makes sense. Sort of.

“I thought omegas didn’t nest until they were older?” I ask.

“That’s why I’m whispering,” says Pink. “We don’t think he has realized yet.”

Jade lets out a quiet groan. “Do you think Brodie is going to be able to cope with Red’s heat? It’s going to be more intense now that he is nesting. Can a human help with that?”

Pink sips his coffee. “Brodie is a healer, I’m sure he’ll figure something out. He’s always been able to help Red through his heats before.”

Oh hell’s balls. The next few days are sure going to be interesting. My dreams of a peaceful life have never felt further away.

G oing out to hunt actually feels peaceful. It is a good escape from the drama unfolding at the house. Not that drama is anything new. There is always something going on.

First it was Lello and all the drama with Carter, and then his herd trying to steal him. Then it was Gray finding his way back to sanity and settling with Mal. Followed by Blue and Sammy being an absolute pair of idiots.

It has been quite the year. But that’s what living with six young men and assorted mates is going to get you. I’m clearly a glutton for punishment. Home is one disaster after the next. Work is full of pining for someone I can never have.

Compared to all that, feeding is simple. Straightforward. Peaceful.

I walk around the corner and the hotel I’m heading to comes into view. I stare at it for a moment, then I check my messages. Yep, this is the right place.

Wow, WellHung45 has expensive taste. Not that I’m complaining.

I slip inside the hotel and quickly navigate my way to the room number Mr. WellHung45 has given me. It is depressing how good I am at finding my way around hotels. All this experience from Grindr hookups and I’m not even getting any action. It is simply a straightforward way to get a stranger to allow me near their neck.

At least tonight’s victim has a lovely set of abs. And a glorious happy trail. Maybe I’ll admire the aesthetics in the flesh before I feed. It is not as if I feel like doing anything else. Well, only with one, very out-of-bounds person.

I knock on the door of room 303 and plaster on my most charming smile. The door swings open and I freeze. Then I blink. Then I blink again.

Morgan cannot be standing in front of me. I’m seeing things because I was just thinking of him and now my mind is glitching. I blink again, but he is still here. With a look of absolute horror slowly consuming his handsome features .

“You’re PowerBottomAtRockBottom?” he wheezes.

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

“Where are the kids?” I snap.

He startles and then rouses himself. “With a babysitter. From a very reputable agency.”

“You have a nanny! You don’t need flipping strangers taking care of the kids!”

Morgan swallows. His Adam’s apple bobs. “It’s your night off.”

My hands go to my hips. “And you couldn’t wait?”

“I didn’t want you to know,” he says softly as his eyes flutter closed.

Damn, he looks good. Navy blue henley and dark jeans. I only ever see him in suits. This casual look suits him. Really suits him.

Angrily I shake my head in a futile attempt to clear it. “How often do you do this?”

He winces and doesn’t open his eyes. “Would you believe me if I said this was the first time?”

I stare at him helplessly. I swear I can hear sincerity in his voice but surely I am only hearing what I want to hear.

“I’m not in the grave yet,” he continues. “I need…”

He trails off and I jump in. “And a man feels less like replacing her?”

His eyes snap open and cloud with hurt. Deep and visceral. Fuck. I’m such an asshole.

“Marrying Jennifer didn’t stop me from being bisexual,” he says, with far more calm than I deserve.

Our eyes lock. Time freezes. He sees my apology. I see the growing question in his eyes. We are both here for the same thing. Or so he thinks.

Tension thickens the air between us.

He is warring with the idea that he could still invite me in, and damn is my heart fluttering at that. I’m tempted, oh lord am I tempted.

But I’m not feeding from Morgan. I’m not biting him and leaving him even more horny than he already is. It is stupid, but I hate the idea of him hooking up with someone else and the thought of him being high on vampire venom while doing it, makes me hate it even more.

Of course, I could feed and then stay.

I swallow audibly. I haven’t had sex since I was freed from the harem. I’m not sure I’m brave enough yet. And sappy old fart that I am, I don’t think my heart could take a hookup with Morgan. I want to make love to the man. I don’t want to be fucked by him.

And none of this, absolutely none of this, is anything I can tell him.

So there is only one thing I can do.

“Let’s…let’s never speak of this again,” I croak.

The light in his eyes dims, and he nods.

Somehow, I turn and start walking away. My body feels robotic and not at all like my own. Then a sudden thought hits me like a thunderclap and I’m whirling around to face Morgan again.

“Delete the photos I sent you!”

Morgan blushes. A beautiful crimson coloring of his cheeks. “Likewise.”

I nod, turn, and this time my body is working, and I can flee. I reach the outside and gulp in a breath of fresh air. Like hell am I deleting those photos. Now I know they are Morgan’s, they are my prized possessions. I’m going to be staring at them every night before I go to sleep. Even though I understand that it is going to be a form of self-harm. I’m going to be torturing myself. But I’m not going to have the willpower to stop.

But that’s a problem for later.

I sigh heavily as I open up Grindr on my phone. Right now, I still need to feed.

As the youngsters say, fuck my life.