War (Boston Bolts Hockey #3)

41. Ava

FORTY-ONE

AVA

After five away games and ten days apart, I’m running around the house like a lunatic trying to make sure everything is ready for when Tyler walks through the door.

“Mama!” Scarlett cries out from the floor as I rush past her. She’s got her arms out, making grabby hands.

I stop in front of her and boop her nose. “Do you want pizza, my little love?”

“Pizza for me.” She points at her chest proudly.

I laugh. “Yes, baby girl. Pizza for you.” With a kiss to her head, I pick her up and head for the kitchen. “Can you sit in your seat so I can finish up?”

She frowns.

“Josie,” I holler. “Can you come sit with sissy until Da—Tyler is home?” I blow out a breath. Shit. I almost referred to Tyler as Daddy. When I’m talking to Scarlett, that’s not an issue. In fact, it’s becoming a habit, but Josie still doesn’t call him that. She doesn’t call me Mom, either. And even when Scarlett does, it’s obvious it’s confusing and uncomfortable for Josie. She’s scared to get her hopes up, so I’ve tried really hard to avoid the word when talking to her.

Scarlett, naturally, doesn’t know the intricacies of the situation, so she finishes the word for me, then repeats it over and over. It’s her favorite word because Tyler is her favorite person.

“Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!” she sings, banging her hands against the tray on her highchair.

I run my hands through her hair. “Yes, little love. Daddy’s coming home.”

When the sound of gravel crunching catches our attention, she kicks her feet and points to the door. “Daddy home.”

Josie bolts down the stairs, her focus determined. “Tyler,” she shouts as she throws the door open and runs out into the cold.

Smiling, I shake my head and move in that direction too. It’s hard not to get emotional as I stand at the window and watch Tyler open his arms to our girl and carry her toward the house, wearing a big smile. The night we came up with this crazy plan, he promised he’d always come running back to these kids. And the way they run to him just as desperately is heart-wrenching. He doesn’t see the love they have for him. All he wants is to give them everything. What he doesn’t realize is that he is everything. To them. To me.

And just like he runs to us, we’re always going to run to him.

“Daddy,” Scarlett calls when he slips inside the house with Josie in his arms and his travel bag slung over one shoulder.

He drops the bag but keeps a tight hold on Josie as he heads toward her little sister. I wait my turn as they get their hugs in.

As soon as he spots me in the corner, he smirks. “You going to keep creeping over there like a little stalker, wifey, or you going to come give your husband a hug?”

“That all you want?” I tease as I shuffle toward him.

He kisses both girls one more time before setting them down and reaching for my hand. Roughly, he tugs, causing my sock-covered feet to slide across the hardwoods. “You know it’s not all I want,” he murmurs as he pulls me into his chest and rests his head on my shoulder. He breathes me in the same way I’m doing to him. “Ten days was too much,” he mutters.

Nodding, I squeeze him tight. “Too long.”

He straightens, towering over me and hiding me from the girls. Then he presses his lips to mine. “Fuck, I missed you. ”

“Same.”

“Wish you and the kids could travel with me.”

With a palm to his cheek, I kiss him again. “One day.”

“Where’s Bray?”

I nod toward the stairs. “Showering after practice. He should be down any minute for dinner.”

Chin lifted, Tyler surveys the kitchen. “And what are we having for dinner?”

“Something very special.” Grinning, I shimmy my shoulders.

“You cooked?”

I laugh. “Yeah, pizza.”

Pulling me into his chest again, he laughs. “Fancy.”

“Hey, you said pizza was your favorite. I’m trying to give you all your favorite things tonight.”

Focus fixed on my face, he licks his lips. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. Pizza, and then you get to teach me how to skate.”

The way his blue eyes widen in surprise makes all my nervousness over this plan worth it. Yeah, I’ll probably fall down a hundred times, and it’s cold out—and dark—but I want to do this with him.

“I even bought skates.”

Tyler’s smile is so full of pure joy it makes my chest ache. “Best night ever. Best wife ever.”

Apparently I wasn’t the only one with surprises. After pizza, we all bundled up and headed for the pond, where I discovered that Brayden and Tyler had strung lights overhead and also around the trees, still covered in a dusting of snow in February.

With a flick of a switch, the entire pond lights up. The snow kissing the edge of the pond is almost diamond-like, sparkling from the overhead lights. As if Tyler has the ability to control nature, the northern lights make an appearance so the sky is a mixture of purples and pinks, like the heavens are putting on a show just for us. It’s a winter dream. Nothing I ever thought I’d experience. Then again, I never could have imagined skating with my husband and our kids.

Josie spins around us, and Bray is almost as good on the ice as Tyler, so he’s got a helmeted Scarlett in his arms, and he’s skating slowly as music plays on his phone.

“Stargazing” by Myles Smith plays as Tyler holds his hand out to me.

“Promise you won’t let me fall?” I ask from the edge of the ice.

Rather than wait for me to come to him, he tugs on my arm and clutches me to his chest. “I might not always be able to stop the fall, baby, but I promise to always be there to pick you up.”

My legs wobble, not only because I’m like a newborn deer on the ice, but because of his words.

With an arm looped around me, Tyler turns us. “Grab my waist and follow my steps. It’s like dancing. One foot glides, then the other follows.”

It’s nothing like dancing, but rather than argue with him, I focus on the task at hand. Being on the ice, the space where Tyler is most comfortable, feels sacred. Especially as the kids skate around us.

As I get more comfortable, he spins Josie until she’s squealing in delight. And when Brayden approaches, he reaches out for Scarlett, who’s calling out for him, and Bray swoops in to guide me.

Skating backward and holding my hands, he says, “You’re not bad for a first timer.”

I laugh. “Thanks, Bray. I’m trying.”

He squeezes my fingers. “We can tell. And it means a lot to them.”

My chest pinches as I take in his sincere expression. He’s not just talking about skating. He’s praising me, in his teenager way, for how I’m handling being hurtled into my role as a mother.

But once again, he keeps himself set apart from our family. He says them , like I’m doing it for them and not him.

There’s no use trying to drive home the point again. He’s not hearing it, and I understand. He’s been let down time and again. All I can do is keep showing him how much he matters to me.

“Big game tomorrow?”

He shrugs. “Yeah. ”

“Did Ty tell you we’re all coming?”

Eyes widening, he fixes his attention on me. “Really? But it’s an hour away.” He shakes his head. “You don’t have to do that. It’s not like?—”

“I’m really excited,” I say. I won’t give him the chance to tell me once again that I don’t owe him anything. “And now that I’m so good on skates, maybe your team could use me. What do you think?”

Snorting, he pretends to pull away from me. “I mean, if you’re so good…”

I squeeze his hands, refusing to let him go. “Don’t you dare.”

He chuckles. “Fine. Come to the game tomorrow. Just, stay in the stands, ’kay?”

Tyler skates up beside us and holds out a hand to me. “What are you two talking about?”

“Bray. Bray,” Scarlett calls.

The guys swap me for the toddler once again. I’d be embarrassed if I wasn’t still wobbling so much.

Brayden takes off a bit faster, spinning. The sound of Scarlett’s giggles floats on the chilly air.

“He’s a hard nut to crack,” I murmur.

With an arm around me, he hums. “I appreciate how hard you try.”

“Always, Ty,” I peer up at him. “And not just because you want me to. I love that kid. He just needs us to keep showing up for him.”

Angling in, he presses his lips to my forehead.

“When did you learn to skate?” I ask, in need of a subject change.

He chuckles. “I’m Canadian. I was born on skates.”

“Right. You came right out of your mother’s womb with death sticks on your feet.”

Laughing, he spins slowly so we can keep an eye on the kids. On the other side of the pond, Josie is telling Brayden a story as she spins, talking with her whole body, like she always does.

“I was probably three. My parents were still married, and they used to take me out to the pond behind their house.”

“When did they get divorced?”

“I think I was five. My dad met Dory through work. It was an affair. My mom never mentioned that part to me, but I put the pieces together when I was older.”

I roll my eyes. “That woman is awful. I’m so sorry I didn’t see it when I was with Xander.”

A low grumble vibrates between us.

“Did you just growl at me?”

Pulling back, he hits me with a scowl. “I really would prefer we never mention past relationships again.”

I flatten my lips to keep from laughing. “Past relationships?” I roll my eyes. “I’ve had a whole whopping one . But yeah, I’d rather not talk about all the women who have owned pieces of you either.”

“There’s been one.” Tyler’s voice is so soft, my head innately tips closer to his, my eyes searching his expression.

Is he going to tell me about the one who got away? My stomach twists in jealousy.

“We don’t need to talk about it.”

“She’s owned me since the first moment I saw her. Knew when I looked into her pretty green eyes that she was my forever.”

A soft breath escapes me as understanding sweeps through me. “Oh.”

Tyler’s lips lift on one side. “Yeah, oh. I remember thinking your eyes were the same color as the ring my mother used to wear on her finger. I forgot about that though until Christmas morning when I pulled the ring from my safe.”

“ Ty .”

He shakes his head. “You’re the only girl outside my mother to ever own any piece of me. And now you have a piece of her. It’s how it was meant to be.”

I think he’s right. I think all along this was our story. Our destiny.

“My dad called while I was away.”

Surprise zips through me. Tyler and I talked and texted every day while he was gone, and he never mentioned it. “Oh yeah?”

“I know it makes no sense that I still want to talk to him, that I still seek his approval.”

Heart aching, I squeeze his hand. “He’s your father.”

“Right. ”

“You don’t ever have to explain yourself to me. Loving someone even when it hurts is natural.”

Shoulders sinking, he sighs. “I told him they aren’t welcome here if Dory can’t treat my family the way she would treat Xander’s. I won’t have my kids believing they mean less than other people do. So much of my life has been shaped by my childhood. By the way I tried to squeeze myself into a box in hopes that by molding who I was, they’d love me. I won’t let our kids do that.”

“I’m proud of you,” I whisper, emotion pricking at the backs of my eyes. “What did he say?”

“He said I have one hell of a wife and that my kids have one hell of a mother. He’s sorry he didn’t find a woman who cared for me the way you so obviously care for my kids.”

Tears well, but I blink them back. “He did?”

Tyler pulls me into his chest, hugging me close. “And he already told Dory the same thing. She will no longer be part of his family if she can’t love the people who matter to him.”

“ Ty ,” I whisper, so completely shocked by this turn of events.

Chin tucked, he smiles down at me. “It was the first time he ever picked me. And it’s because of you. Because you stuck up for me.”

“I’ll always stick up for you.”

Angling down, he brushes his lips against mine. “Thank you for the pizza tonight. And for letting me teach you how to skate. This is exactly what I needed. You’re everything I’ve ever needed.”

His words heal parts of me, and I’m not even sure he knows it. Going for lighthearted is the only way I can keep myself from tearing up. “I like when you teach me things.”

He chuckles. “Oh, wifey. I’ll gladly teach you something new every day for the rest of my life.”

Beaming, I hold out my glove-covered little finger. “Pinky promise?”