Where the Darkness Goes

Chapter 4

CHAPTER FOUR

GARRETT — AGE 17

Save me a game when we get back, ok?

It’s stupid, but it’s also the third draft, and if I spend any more time on this text, Will is going to notice for sure. And then there will be questions.

“You sure Tessa doesn’t want to come with us?” I cock my head to the side, trying to sound nonchalant and not at all stalkerish. Wearing an expression that I hope says I don’t actually care about your response, and in fact, I’ve nearly forgotten what I asked , we make our way to the neighborhood ball court. It’s rundown, with no net and a faded backboard that hasn’t been replaced since my dad was a kid, but it works.

“Why would she?” Will scowls, stopping abruptly to tie his laces. They’re always coming untied.

“Hmm? Oh. I don’t know. Just seems like she’s bored in the house all day.”

“It’s summer. She has Britney over, like, all the time. She’s fine.” He stands back up. “Besides, it’s not like she’s any good. We need a strong team.”

I nod. He’s not wrong, though I wasn’t really suggesting Tessa play with us, just that she… what? Watch?

That’s not really better, I guess, but I can’t help thinking of her holding that controller out for me. I like playing video games with her. Will kicks both our butts most of the time, but it doesn’t matter. He knows I can beat him when I’m not taking it easy on her.

When it’s just the two of us, though, and she does that stupid little victory dance: hands in the air, wiggling fingers, spinning in a circle?—

“What are you smiling about?” Will scowls at me from across the court, and clearly, there’s been a whole conversation I’ve missed.

“Nothing. Let’s play.” He passes me the ball as we divide into our usual teams.

When I looked back at the house on the way here, I could’ve sworn I saw the curtain in her bedroom move. Like she was watching us. Probably just checking to make sure we were gone, but part of me wondered if she was watching us for another reason. Watching me , specifically.

It’s stupid. This is stupid.

She’s Tessa. She’s like a little sister to me. She’s always been like a little sister to me. She’s the one I taught to play freeze tag and the one whose hair I cut gum out of—though her mom wasn’t too happy with me over that.

She’s been my friend as long as I’ve known Will, and we can never be anything else. Period.

Maybe that’s not what this is about anyway, these confusing feelings I’ve been having lately when I’m around her. Maybe it’s just that I miss her sometimes. As a friend. We used to spend a lot more time together—all of us—but lately, I spend most of my time with the guys playing ball or out on dates with girls from class.

I feel like I’m seeing her less and less, and I have no idea why that bothers me. We’re growing up and growing apart, which is normal. It’s not like Tessa is my responsibility.

I just feel bad for her, I guess. My house is filled with my siblings and chaos, and hers always seems so empty and quiet.

My phone buzzes in my pocket with her response, but I don’t dare check it. Still, the knowledge that it’s there waiting for me, that she’s home waiting for me, keeps my chest feeling tight the entire game.